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May 10, 2006

Oh! That's what this is.

Wow. It's so weird. I was just toodling along, going through the submissions on the film I'm casting, when BAM! Something went wonky. My emotions started flying all over the place and I couldn't for the life of me understand what would make me so completely fly off the grid.

tnmomswedding.jpg

Ah yes. 11 May 2006 would've been my mother's 73rd birthday. There ya go.

Even though it does, somehow, get less heart-wrenching each year, I guess there are going to be days when it just slices right through my heart that I had to lose my mom when I was 30.

I know, I know! I had her for THIRTY YEARS. Some daughters get nothing close to that with their moms... or if they do, they don't have the CLOSENESS that we did. Damn, we were so so so so close. She was SUCH my best friend. And my therapist. And my mentor. And my MOM, dammit.

Ugh.

So, now that I GET why I'm suddenly a basketcase, I can get through it and continue on. Because that's what Charlsie's only daughter would do, right? Absofuckinglutely!

Posted by bonnie at May 10, 2006 11:04 PM

Comments

Oh, Bon. So much love to you.

Posted by: Amy Ingalls Author Profile Page at May 11, 2006 4:03 AM

So touching. Hugs.

Posted by: kittin sticks Author Profile Page at May 11, 2006 8:53 AM

Awww, Scat! Big hugs.

I was just thinking late last night how it will be when my parents will, eventually die (must be that psychic energy!).

I'm sure in a lot of ways it makes it a lot more painful that you were sooo close and to lose someone that close. But to know you had the best relationship with her you possibly could have while she was still here has to make you feel pretty fucking great.

corny poetry time (TM) (okay I know I haven't ever quoted poetry before (because I think it's corny) but I'm trademarking it anyway):

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."

(I totally put the 'tis in there thinking I was being corny/extra dorky but it turns out it really is "'tis")

Posted by: babes at May 11, 2006 11:52 AM

Dearest Bon...
Thank you so much for being 'so open'. Precious memories that can never be taken away. I love you dear.

Posted by: PameLa at May 11, 2006 1:20 PM

BonBon, I love these pictures of you and your mom.

Sending you big love.

Posted by: Erik at May 11, 2006 7:26 PM

Happy birthday, Charlsie. Rest well. Send Georgia my love while you're there.

XOXO love you, honey

Posted by: Ali Author Profile Page at May 11, 2006 8:31 PM

I know the worst day in my life will be the day my mother dies. I totally feel for you. And I love the pictures.

Posted by: christina at May 11, 2006 9:45 PM

I love you, Sis.

Posted by: Debra at May 12, 2006 3:52 AM

love the pics...i can relate...but memories are forever...hugs~
XOXO

Posted by: delora at May 12, 2006 7:22 PM