May 14, 2010

Interesting

I haven't uploaded a photo in the 2010 Photo a Day challenge since May 11th.

I took only 11 photos on the 12th, which is of course 12 of 12. I still haven't uploaded them.

I'm not motivated to post anything at this blog because it is so completely overrun with spam comments that we've had to just turn off the whole dang thing. (Well, that's not true, there are still a zillion spam comments waiting for moderation, but I can't even sift through them to see if there are real ones, so why bother, y'know?)

Completely disgusted by the violation of privacy settings (I'm calling it rape, since Facebook has been so aggressively shady about rolling out these "new features" that most folks don't even understand), I've pulled off almost all vids, photos, notes, links, and tags at Facebook, while uninstalling almost all apps and extras. I've also been going at least two days between log-ins at the Facebook, which is ridiculously less frequent than I used to.

I used to think in status updates (like, whenever something would happen, I'd say, "Ooh, 'Bonnie Gillespie is...' HA! That's funny," and then remember that for when I next logged in. Now I don't. I'm using Facebook for its reach now, not for pleasure.

And amazingly, I'm not HURTING for a place to share a list of my favorite shows, a random share meme, a link I found that I think might be interesting, or anything else that social networking (via e-groups, then message boards, then Friendster and MySpace and Facebook) has been so good about helping me cultivate over the years.

I'm so busy with the launch of Somebody's Basement that I really can't focus on anything else. Oh wait, yes I can. Like the casting offer we put out today for the lead in Everything But. Or the casting deal memo that's about two steps away from being executed on the next film project (breakdown next week if we stay on schedule). Or like the collaboration with a few of the finest industry players in this business which will launch later this year. Or my pilot, the treatment for which I have a meeting over the weekend. Or the web series I'm exec producing. Or the fact that my stepson will be in town in just over a month!

Oh...

I see why I'm no longer focused on things like snagging a photo a day, or 12 on the 12th, or updating my status at Facebook. I am so completely overrun with all the other things in my world--things I love, love, LOVE--that I'm just making time to Tweet (thank goodness for the Twitter) and even that, I'm behind on somehow.

I'm feeling okay with this. There's a transition going on both online and within my life. It's like all of the online stuff I did to grow my business has worked. And now I have to run my business. I'm using different muscles now. And it's the best kind of sore, y'know?

This is pretty awesome. Believe me, I am sooo blissed out right now. Even if you don't get a daily status update saying so. :)

Posted by bonnie at 11:42 PM | Comments (0)

March 16, 2010

Good Credit

Okay, this is going to be a long, ranty one. So, settle in.

I've been a member of the AFTRA/SAG Federal Credit Union since the '90s. They have my checking account, my savings account, my stepson's Coogan account, my husband's checking account, my husband's savings account, and until today my credit card account. They also once had a signature loan for me. They're good. Except for today.

Seems the AFTRA/SAG Federal Credit Union credit cards are under new management this year and, just like the last time they went under new management four years ago, I didn't receive a bill. Yup. It's a total scam. They change companies and then the second or third bill doesn't come, so you are late with your payment and they can lop on fees, offer you the opportunity to pay by phone, and offer to enroll you in auto-pay plans. Awesome. I remember this well. It happened in late 2005, when the credit card went under new management the last time.

So, February's bill never came and I was traveling and therefore totally didn't notice that I hadn't written a check 'til Miss Henry called me last week to tell me I hadn't. Crap. So, I do a payment by phone immediately and ask her what repercussions this late payment has on my account (increase in APR, fees, etc.). She assures me that the only charge is this $39 fee, which she can reverse since I haven't been late with a payment since 2005, when--strangely enough--the company change happened last time. Awesome. Charge reversed. February bill paid. March bill on its way with the fee showing, but she assures me it's been reversed. Gives me a confirmation number. Yada yada yada.

Today's mail includes a letter from the credit card company ("cardmember services" -- no company name anywhere to be found) stating that "Because you have not consistently paid the minimum monthly payment on or before the due date, we have reduced your credit limit." They've reduced it to my current balance. I usually keep a good five grand available on any credit card, because it's not only good for my credit rating, but it's also always nice to know I have that kind of credit available to me, should an emergency hit.

Let's note for the record here that I have a FICO score of 788.

788.

I am an excellent customer, if you are a bank. I always pay my bills early (except for when my credit card company inexplicably neglects to send a statement, apparently). I never bounce checks. I am your worst nightmare, if you want to ding customers with fees, because I will almost never give you the opportunity to do so. However, if you want a customer who will always pay her bills and carry a balance so you can collect interest, while never costing you in collections, I am your dream come true.

I am also planning on buying a house this year, so I don't need any drama where my credit score is concerned. I am looking forward to my 4.5% home loan after putting only 3% down, plus first-time buyer credit. I am not dicking around, here.

So, when I got a letter telling me that my credit limit had been slammed down to the current balance I carry on my card, I made a phone call.

First there was Marie, who told me that perhaps Miss Henry hadn't been made aware that my credit limit had been lowered, and that's why she didn't disclose it last week when I asked what ramifications existed due to missing February's payment. She then transferred me to Carmen, since what I wanted was a reversal of that cap. She couldn't offer me that.

Neither could Carmen. She said she could certainly put in a request to increase my credit limit, but I'm no dummy. I told her that was not what I wanted, because that would trigger a notice in my credit report that I was seeking access to more credit, just before buying a home. No thank you. That makes me look like a bad risk. Not interested. I just want y'all to undo the punishment you saw fit to bestow upon me without notice, last week.

The call got escalated to a supervisor, Kent. (And let me state for the record that I handled this call VERY well. Sometimes I get hot-headed. Sometimes I yell. Today, I did not. I am very proud of that. Especially because I have every reason to yell.) I stayed calm and repeatedly asked for what I wanted: A reversal of the punishment they put on my account. A return to the credit limit I have enjoyed--yet never hit--in nearly a decade with this credit card.

Nope.

Not gonna happen. They can put in a request for a credit limit increase--which will show up on my credit report as consumer requested--but there's no guarantee I'll get it (bullshit. I'll get it. I'll get it and more. I have excellent credit. They want me to have access to--and to use--many more thousands of dollars on their card than I already do).

Fuckers.

So, I tell Kent not to bother with that request, as I'll simply close my card and transfer the balance elsewhere, rather than giving another penny to this ridiculous company that wants to punish someone with a fucking 788 FICO score.

(*breathe*)

Anyone wanna tell me a great credit card company that loves new, excellent customers who want to transfer over thousands of dollars?

(Yes, I understand that this will also show up on my credit report, and probably does me more harm than "requesting" the increased credit limit. So, what I'll probably just end up doing is closing the account so it shows up "closed; paying as per cardmember agreement" and wait for a credit card company to send me an incentive application that includes 2.9% APR for balance transfers. That's how I closed my Chase Visa, years ago.)

But man, I'm so fucking mad I could spit tacks. This is why we hate the banks, people! You punish good customers in ways that screw their credit rating. You put us between a rock and a hard place and remind us why stuffing money in a mattress is never a bad idea.

Posted by bonnie at 1:05 PM | Comments (4)

February 28, 2010

Such Plans

I had such plans for February.

I really was going to blog more.

Especially after my trip to Atlanta. I even have photos!

Ah well. I'm beat. Overworked. Thrilled, but way overworked. Totally gratified. And tired.

So, here's my "I swear I was going to blog more in February" post.

More next month. It's a longer month. That means the odds are better, right?

Posted by bonnie at 10:17 PM | Comments (1)

December 31, 2009

Welcome 2010

It's funny, I wasn't going to do a year-end post today. And really, the only reason I feel the need to, now is that I keep seeing all of these status updates on Twitter and Facebook today with people grousing about "what a shitty year 2009 was" and I keep thinking, "Huh? Yeah, I mean, I know it wasn't the BEST year ever, but it sure as shit was one of MY best years."

I'm in awe of the good people I'm surrounded with, and I met (and surpassed) so many goals in 2009, professionally and personally. I never felt alone, I never felt lost, I never felt so down that a look or a word or a THOUGHT from a friend couldn't fix it.

I have NO complaints. :) I am SO excited about all that 2010 will bring.

And even if 2009 was a year you can't wait to see gone, why focus on THAT? I don't get it. It's like folks whose Twitter streams and Facebook pages are shrines to all the things they want to criticize. Dude? What's the POINT? How's about we focus on what we want and not what we don't want? I'm so filled with love and hope and excitement over where we're headed, I can't even remember what was "wrong" with 2009. It's like a fight with a loved one. The next day, who can even remember what seemed so important during that fight? It's just not worth it. (And even if you can remember vividly, why do you want to dwell on that?)

It's like one of my favorite new mantras of the year, "I can feel better or I can keep thinking about THAT."

So, let's feel better. Let's be so freakin' excited about what's ahead for 2010 that we can't even remember what might have been less-than-awesome about 2009. Cool? Well, whether it's cool with y'all or not, that's how I'm gonna do it.

I'm in love with my life and ain't nevah gonna apologize for that!

Welcome, 2010! I love ya' already. :)

Posted by bonnie at 3:44 PM | Comments (3)

August 25, 2009

Why I Walked Out on "District 9"

I had seen the billboards all year long.

I knew this was gonna be a great film. I mean, look at those cryptic ads! The online movement! The geek fanbase! No reason not to go. It'd be fun!

So, on a total whim, Keith and I popped in to see this District 9 last night.

Let me back up.

I've been sick. Like... in bed since Friday night sick. No, you didn't see that on Facebook or Twitter because I'm pretty dang militant about leaving everyone else out of the loop when I feel like ass. (Well, everyone other than Keith, who has to take care of me.) When folks assume I'm not posting because I'm working so dang hard that I don't have the time, I like that. That's the vibe I want out there. I'm not sick often and I'm not a good patient when I am, so I really do prefer to keep that experience in-house. (Thank you, honey.) And I *reeeeaallllly* dislike all of the, "Oh, you're sick? Poor thing. Feel better," well-meaning but overall whiny-sounding wishes. Very sweet, but really, envision me kicking ass, not getting my ass kicked. Thanks.

But Monday, I had had enough! I had just finished a call-in to LA Talk Radio (that link is an MP3; I'm in at 15 minutes) and decided I felt well enough that I had to leave the house! Had to honor the spiritual call to happy hour and a frosty vodka jalapeño passionfruit cocktail with my hubs, the old-school daiquiri drinker.

Man, that jalapeño is great for opening up "sick head" after three days! (And the cheese plate is good too.)

So, we're in this great mindspace of loving each other and having an impromptu date, celebrating my progress to being vertical for a change. The jazz trio is playing and our waitress is awesome. We're loving life, talking about all of the big plans we have for the $250M we'll win in the lottery this week. It's just a lovely night in Santa Monica. One like so many we've shared in our five years here.

As we walk back up the Promenade toward home, on a total whim, Keith and I pop in to see this District 9.

I knew it was going to be dark. But I thought maybe Ironman +2 dark. Not Ironman +200 dark. (Plus, what made the dark parts of Ironman so live-with-able for me was all the humor and the, um, yum, Robert Downey, Jr., of it all.) Even so, I can handle dark, so long as the ride is good. The story is well-told. The adventure is exciting somehow.

I never got excited. I got grossed out a couple of times. Full on covered my eyes at one point (Keith asked, "Do we need to go?" and I shook my head, sure I could soldier through it). And then I started thinking about Keith's military days and how he still has those war dreams sometimes. I realized we were watching stuff that might cause more of those. And for me too! I wasn't enjoying myself anymore. There was one particular choice that was so distasteful in my mind and heart (I won't share it here, lest spoilers exist in the sharing of it) that I turned to Keith--probably ten minutes after he asked me the question--and said, "Yeah. Can we go?" He nodded. We grabbed our stuffs. Out we went, into the welcoming, warm air and the music of the street musicians on the Promenade, tourists and homeless and locals milling happily together. Laughter. Freedom. Life.

Ahh... much better.

The last movie I walked out of before District 9 was Gone Fishin' back in grad school. I stayed put for Spice World (gleefully so) but couldn't sit through that.

Anyway, I guess I just like my cinematic journeys to be fun rides. They don't have to be HAPPY all the time. They don't have to be schmaltzy or sappy sweet. I do like the dark too. But I like the dark with just enough light that I remember it's just like life. We DO have sweetness if we choose to see it.

Oh, and because one of my fine Twitter followers asked why it is that I don't see a lot of movies, I should set the record straight.

I read a LOT of scripts. I watch a LOT of reels. I consume a LOT of TV and Internet programming. I go to a LOT of plays and showcases and comedy shows. And I attend a LOT of screenings and watch a LOT of things in less "consumer plunking down ten bucks" ways. But, yeah, it's pretty rare that I show up as a consumer and plunk down ten bucks to see a film in a theater with strangers who talk, text, smack on their popcorn, sit right in front of another patron or kick the backs of the seats in front of them, in order to "go on the ride" with an audience like that anymore. It's not as enjoyable an experience as it once was, which means if I have the option (and, because of my job and because of Keith's job, I usually do), I'll watch a screener in my laptop with a glass of wine and a pause button when needed, almost every time.

So, the comment about how long it's been since I had walked out of a movie being an indicator that "I don't go to many movies" was more about the act of seeing movies in theaters than hitting eject on ones I don't like, when I'm watching them from home. :) I do that too.

But to fork over many-many dollars for our tickets, the popcorn, my water, and Keith's soda and then forfeit that money in exchange for our happiness just 45 minutes later is a different thing. That's saying something.

In this case, it's saying, "I like the happy."

(Bonus: Up all night sick. Both the over-extending of the physical before truly well and the emotional turmoil of the film's graphic imagery were enough to keep me doubled over most the night. Whee!)

(See why I'd rather not share when I'm sick? I'd rather it just look like I'm working my arse off. Which I'm happy to get back to, today. Once I watch Glee again, in order to really cleanse the District 9 palette.)

Posted by bonnie at 2:14 PM | Comments (11)

August 11, 2009

Happy Birthday, TicTac!

So, I celebrate the birthday of my car.

I know, I know, it was "born" before I took it as my own on 11 August 1989, but this is its birthday, so there.

And it's its 20th birthday. 20th!!!

Baby TicTac, you have protected me from injury in accidents. You have gotten me places safely when I've been reckless. You have made me look damn fine just by letting me drive around with your top down... for 20 years.

Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm nearly "the 40-year-old with the convertible," and that's kind of sad and mid-life-crisis-ish, but I say that's only if it's age 40 when you buy your first convertible.

If instead, you're celebrating 20 years with it, you're still cool.

In my book anyway.

Happy birthday, Mighty TicTac. I promised you 20 years ago, I'd never let you go.

Posted by bonnie at 3:12 PM | Comments (1)

March 20, 2009

Charger Plate

Okay, so the first time I ever heard the words "charger plate" was somewhere in the neighborhood of November 2008 when Fawnda was rambling about her woodland creature napkin holders and other stuffs she'd bought from the Pottery Barn for Thanksgiving dinner.

So, tonight, Keith and I are out for a wonderful date at a favorite place and it's nice and quiet as non-trendy places that serve amazing food should be on a hot Friday night.

Well, around 8:30pm, the hostess lady came around and started picking up all of the salad forks from the unoccupied tables. She placed them on a silver platter covered with cloth napkins. It was a very formal experience.

Around 8:45pm, the hostess lady came back around and started picking up all of the charger plates (hence the whole conversation about WTF a charger plate is and why it's necessary and whether we're out of the loop for not needing nor caring whether we ever have such a thing under any plate--or removed before the introduction of our plate--at any time).

And around 9pm, the hostess lady came back through and out went all of the wine glasses.

Huh?

So is the rate of theft of extraneous silverware, charger plates, and wine glasses exponentially higher as we reach 9pm on a Friday in Santa Monica?

Does the likelihood that anyone will order a meal requiring a salad fork or wine glass plummet after 9pm? (Does it matter that the restaurant is open 24/7?)

And that charger plate. Do we just--as a society--require less-formal arrival conditions in fancy restaurants at a certain hour?

(Seeing as I have never had an interest in--nor knowledge of--a charger plate prior to five months ago, I guess that whole last part is lost on me. But I thank the Wiki for schooling me a bit.)

So, huh?

I really kinda wanted to ax the hostess lady about it, but was too much in love with my dinner. And my hubs.

Holy crap.

Sometimes there is nothing a bottle of Ferrari-Carano, kisses from the beloved, a lobster tail, a slab o' meat, and a big-ass potato can't fix.

(Note: Nothing needed fixing. I had another sentence there, but it ended in a preposition. And I blog so infrequently now that I figure I might as well be more grammatically correct. Hence my use of "ax" for "ask.")

What?

This is why I don't blog much anymore. Twitter better. Shorter. Ahh...

Posted by bonnie at 10:28 PM | Comments (2)

October 30, 2008

I am SO excited!

I know! I must be! If I'm blogging instead of Twittering or Facebooking about it, I must be really excited. :)

So, what's the excitement about?

1. FINALLY received my vote-by-mail ballot (and JUST in time for the deadline too) after Keith requested both online and received his the next day... like two weeks ago. I was so pissed. Like, "I'm the one who didn't want to wait in line and have to make nice with crazy neighbor lady who volunteers for ALL SHIFTS in EVERY ELECTION--bless her heart for doing that. I think that rocks and it's the kind of thing I would like to do. But she's effin' crazy and making nice with her is VERY tedious when the lines are long and we're around each other for longer than a, 'Good morning' in passing--and YOU'RE the one who gets your ballot and mine is nowhere to be seen?" Dude! So not cool. But now it's here and I can vote tonight when we get back from dinner and mail it in the morning and be done with it all. Now... does that mean the ads will stop?

2. Fun dinner tonight at favorite place with super-cool people and I'm really in need of a little play time. Haven't had much of that that hasn't been actual WORK masquerading as play time lately. Woo!

3. Super-dang-cool proposition that I got yesterday about an opportunity for some showcasers has come together and it actually is happening tomorrow and I'm just really, really pleased at the "residual effects" of having decided to produce a showcase a couple of years ago. More later. Wee bit superstitious on the "big stuff" as I'm sure any actors reading this know all about. ;)

4. Amazing phone meeting this morning with a producer on two films I'm casting starting next month. Revised deal memo in his hot little hands. Should start work tomorrow, technically. On contract for several months. LOVE IT!

5. Last week's amazing phone meeting with two producers on another film I'm *hopefully* casting had its follow-up phone meeting (scheduled for 10/28) postponed 'til next week, but I'm still optimistic. It's a great script, so hopefully it will come together. And if not, no biggie, because...

6. Last week's spoken word series attendance yielded a huge chunk of news from a favorite filmmaker whose next script I was always going to be casting (but we were looking at mid-to-late 2009 to start, last time we talked). Now it looks like I'll start work on THIS one before the year ends and I have to say, as much as I like making new relationships with new filmmakers and producers, there's something really wonderful about working with people who've hired me before. We have shorthand. And there's no negotiating on the deal memo. It's just DONE. They know I'm worth it. ;)

7. I've lost 45 pounds this year, plus 6" from my waist. This isn't "news" but it's the kind of thing people LOVE to read about for some reason, so there it is. :) Still have more to do, but DAMN it feels good to have done such good work over such a long stretch of time--so consistently--and have folks say, when they see me now, "Damn, girl! Where did you GO?!" while looking at my ass. ;) Or what's left of it. ;)

8. Had a great time speaking at UC Irvine yesterday. I seriously love getting paid to go speak to actors and it's happened more times in the month of October than in any previous month this year. I'm REALLY liking this trend and hoping to head out of town to do more and more of it. :) There, I've put it out there. Let's make it so!

9. The book is now accurately-depicted on Amazon.com... AND it's in the hands of the Yale Drama Department, thanks to a showcaser who bought (discounted--of course) copies for the grad division and the library! Wow! That's badass. THANK YOU! (Bonus that he's one of my all-time favorite actors and I'm so happy he's showcasing with us, as I'm such a fan of his work!) Will spend the bulk of the days after the showcase packaging and mailing a few hundred copies out to other schools, plus to all of the contributors and proofers who aren't based in LA (or who couldn't make it to our little "thank you" party last week).

10. Showcase is next week and RSVPs are coming in steadily, though lighter than last time out. Eh... it's election season. I have a very good feeling that everyone will be READY for a party, come Wednesday and Thursday. And we're gonna throw 'em one. With HILARIOUS original scenes and brilliantly talented actors directed by one of the most gifted men I know. Can't wait! (Hope you'll join us! Free everything!! :) Just the way we like it.)

And that's it. I love my life, I love my husband, I love my kitties, I love where I live, I love what I KNOW is going to happen next week, and I love love love that I'm just moments away from a frosty margarita and side-splitting laughter that will last for hours I'm sure. See y'all later! :)

Posted by bonnie at 6:16 PM | Comments (0)

September 14, 2008

I don't care about your politics.

Seriously.

Stop subjecting me to it.

Let me clarify.

Stop subjecting me to it in places I don't expect to find it, places I don't visit to find it. If you're politically passionate and I know that about you, I'm probably not visiting your blog (or MySpace page or Twitter stream or whatever) right now because I really just don't give a shit how you feel about anything political and since that's all you can seem to talk about right now, I'll just avoid places where that's gonna happen. No prob.

We can live in peace while you go on and on and on about the importance of whatever issue and I ignore your incessant ramblings. We'll reconnect when you've gotten it out of your system. Great.

But when you come in to my email world and blast me with "sign this petition" and "forward this email" and "raise money for this cause" and "boycott this product" and on and on and on, I am seriously ready to warn you: I've reached a breaking point and am considering doing bodily harm to you. Or at least making a voodoo doll of you and poking it. A lot.

BONUS: When you blast these emails to everyone in your address book and don't bother to BCC the list. This means that every flippin' one of the sometimes 1000+ people you've emailed all at once now has 1000+ new email addresses in front of 'em, and while I'm sure your friends are all very nice people, I get enough fucking email every day as it is. I do NOT want some fuckwit in Wisconsin hitting "reply to all" on your gawtdam email about your political passion, continuing the debate "in public."

Look, I don't mind debates.
I don't mind passionate people.
And if I see you in person and we want to talk politics, you bet, I'll have at it.

But I never provided my email address to anyone (not a family member, not a friend, not a co-worker, not an actor, not ANYONE) in order to receive BLASTS about how YOU FEEL about politics. Nope. Didn't sign up for it. I'm opting out of all your bullshit emails. All of them. Yep. You send me bullcrap about your political agenda--even if I agree with it 100%--and you're done sending me email. Period. New mail rule: Straight to trash, unread.

I can avoid blogs and MySpace pages and Twitter streams when I don't want to be subjected to political whatnot. But when you come into MY SPACE and blast your agenda, uninvited, it's the same thing as if you called me on the phone and read from a script about the damn issue. I'd hang up on you and block your number. So, I'm doing that online now.

I remember thinking others should absolutely care about my political opinions. The very first election in which I was old enough to vote, I got so involved that I wrote up a 14-page bullet-point list of why I was voting the way I was voting and actually sent it to my "other party" best friend and to my "other party" cousin. I thought it was awesome that I was so passionate and informed and involved at such a young age. And shouldn't they want to see that?

Nope. I'm surprised they bothered to speak with me after that.

Look, wear your campaign button. Put your campaign bumper sticker on your car. Put your campaign sign up in your front yard. Go to rallies where you can gather with others who want to yell and stand together and debate and cheer and whatever else. And when I want to do those things, I will do them too.

YES, I am very, very, very passionate about issues I feel strongly about and YES, I am very, very, very opinionated about how I'm gonna vote and why.

Here's the difference between me and all of these simps who keep blasting the emails: I don't give a CRAP how you vote or how you feel about the issues that are important to you. Now, let me qualify that.

I absolutely, sometimes, give a very big crap about how you feel and will engage you in conversation about that when so inspired. I may even visit your blog or MySpace page or Twitter stream now and then--when I'm in the mood to consume such stuff--to see how you're feeling about any one particular political issue.

But I'm not likely to engage in debate with you unless we're out together in person, sipping cocktails and having an intelligent, inspired, passionate conversation about our positions.

I do not log in to my email accounts to read a BLAST of your opinions. I don't fucking care. I didn't sign up for your "opinion emails." And I'm certainly not going to change my political views just because you're obsessed with blasting me about yours.

Just like none of the 50,000 weekly readers of my column visit to find out what I think about the upcoming elections (and duh, could you possibly know me and have read anything I've ever written ever and not figure my political leanings out? Duh), I didn't share my email address with you so that you could cram your political opinions down my throat.

I don't care about your politics.

One person actually asked me what extreme thing (from a list of things) she should do in the name of raising funds for her favorite issue.

My response?

"I'll donate money to your cause if you promise to shut the fuck up about it forever and ever."

That's more extreme than any tattoo-getting, head-shaving, or Peace Corps-joining any day.

(And I know it's futile to rant about how forward people want to be about sharing their political opinions. They're gonna keep doing it. They can't help it. And it's their right to do so. But dammit, now I have a link to send the assholes who think I invited their bullshit into my inbox, the next time it happens. Which I anticipate to be any minute now. The stream is endless, it seems. *sigh* So, you got an email from me in reply to an issue-laden email blast I never signed up for in which there was a link to this blog post? Great. Now you know. I'll never see any of your emails again. The "straight to trash" rule has been applied to your email address. Congrats!)

Posted by bonnie at 12:17 PM | Comments (4)

August 21, 2008

Long Overdue Long Update

Phew! Okay, so.

I have been working on the edits for the 3rd edition of Self-Management for Actors since August began. I got my first seven chapters to proofers on August 4th. The book has 46 chapters. I continued to get chapters to my awesome proofers daily through the 15th and had all of their feedback by the 18th.

I've been entering changes and trying to cut content (the book was originally going to be 368 pages but looked like it would be 630+ pages as of the 15th) since then and--today--the 520-page *near-final* manuscript was FedExed to the final team of proofers who do the cover-to-cover read and get notes to me by the 29th.

And then this lovely book hits the printer on September 1st. And will be in stores everywhere by Thanksgiving (if not sooner).

Our international distributor tells us we've already sold 800 copies. Yay! But also: Oops. The book is now 150 pages longer than originally listed (and it's now also eight bucks more per book). Wow.

It was the last couple of days that were the most intense. I woke up at 6am Wednesday and said, "Today is the day I call failure on my SMFA3 goals." I just knew there was no way I would have everything ready in time. No way. But when I went to bed at 5am Thursday, I had logged in 22 hours of work on the book, 45 minutes nap time, and 10 minutes on Wii Fit.

I slept for four hours this morning and then finished up everything to have Keith take the manuscript to Kinko's to copy and then FedEx out. I was back in bed at 4pm and up at 7pm. So, my sleep patterns are wonky (and the heat works well with that... bleh) and now I'm feeling all buzzed and antsy. I've found that opening three weeks' worth of mail and paying a few bills has helped calm me down. Soon, I will listen to at least a week's worth of voicemails, as I've not even had the phone volume UP for at least that long. Book mode is serious focus, y'all.

In other news, the breakdown for the November 2008 Cricket Feet Showcase went out on Monday. Submission deadline is the 25th. Auditions will be held on September 8th. I'm so looking forward to meeting our new cast!! And to working with Chil and Eitan and Tamika and Keith again, as always.

I can't believe what a great couple of years it's been, doing this showcase. Just awesome.

I'm being interviewed by Spun Gold TV next week. This will mark my third televised UK interview in 18 months. First was for BBC Breakfast. Second was for UTV in Ireland. This is another London-based outfit and they're sending an actor to Hollywood and following her as she meets with people. Apparently, it is now known in the UK that I give good, "cheeky" TV in a very fun, biz-savvy manner. Cool. That'll help when we're ready to take the roadshow abroad.

News on that: We're going to try and do some LA-adjacent tours and speaking engagements in the last two months of 2008, and then we'll head to other cities and states (and countries?) in 2009. Very much looking forward to this. Haven't been on the road in a long time.

Saturday is my 20th high school reunion. I will not be there. Two main reasons: 1. August. 2. Atlanta.

I mean, c'mon! October, I could do. But Atlanta in August? Dunwoody Country Club in August? In formalwear? Really? Nah. I'll have more fun hearing the stories, I'm sure.

Let's see... what else?

The four-week class I was supposed to teach at the Hayworth got pushed to November.

I've lost 40 pounds since Christmas. (And five inches off my waist, thankyouverymuch.)

I get to hang out with the director of Another Harvest Moon next week and catch up on all the tales from the set and plans from here.

I can only imagine the tales will be outstanding (the ones I've already heard are hilarious and touching and inspiring).

And that the plans for this film are... big. I got chills looking through the photos at the website just now. Dear GAWD, this film is going to be amazing.

I still need to read a script that's been sent to me for a casting bid. It's a $2M thriller and looks good from quick skim of a couple of pages. (Honestly, I've been so busy with the book, there's been no time to do other stuff.)

I've learned I'm really good at compartmentalizing. (I mean, I knew that already, but it's become VERY clear with all of this work on the book this month.) When I go into book mode, I'm a machine. It has been nearly three years since I've had this experience, but it really is like riding a bike. It all comes back to you and hopefully you've given yourself enough empty road to not bump into anything at first.

As with the 2nd edition, I have both the HUGE worry that I've messed up whatever was good about the book by making changes to it AND the certainty that it might possibly be the best book for actors ever written.

This "sure you suck" and "sure you rock" simultaneous opinion is pretty tough to maintain, but somehow I find a way. ;)

Okay. Not sure what's next. So much got set aside in the past three weeks that I just need to start on something... but I also need to just CHILL. Perhaps I'll play computer solitaire for about five hours straight. That'll be fun. And maybe a walk to the beach when Keith gets home, just to remember what that's like. Oooh! Or a midnight trip to the gym. A good sweat in an over-air-conditioned facility might feel REALLY good right about now.

Or maybe I need to just sit here for a minute. :) Just be.

OH!!!!! HUGE thanks to the actor who sent me free passes to the Magic Castle (I've never been!!) and also to the actor who sent me half-off passes to Glen Ivy Hot Springs (I've definitely been!!) as encouragement for working so hard on the book. :) I love you guys. Also love my friends who made me take playdate breaks once a week or so while all of this was going on.

Man, I've got it so damn good it's just ridiculous.

I hope you can say the same, everyone. I've missed keeping up with you all. Catch me up! What's going on in your world?

XO

Posted by bonnie at 10:46 PM | Comments (7)

August 7, 2008

Two Things

Taking a very quick (2/3 of the day's work done) break from edits on SMFA3 to post two things.

One, I've found if I approach my writing/editing work with the same mindset I approach Wii Fit and iTunes playlists, I get a LOT done. I look at a master list of tasks and see where I'm under-performing and start there, build up, beat my last score, play what's not been played enough, and then go back to the master list to see what needs to be done next. Only when I've gotten two hard things done am I given a treat of an easy thing.

(No, that does not mean that I only value success unless it's part of a struggle, like I wrote about in this week's column. Although, I appreciate your concern. ;) Believe me, I'm much healthier now. In many ways.)

It's just an interesting pattern of my process. I tackle the hard stuff. Hit it hard. Work it over. Get it looking manageable. And then I get to PLAY with an easy one, with one I'm good at, with one I OWN. ;)

(Keith mentioned last night that it makes him sad to see me get frustrated when something doesn't work the way my brain thinks it should. For instance, we were playing this ridiculous bull-run game on Wii and the way you have to turn the controller in order to steer your... well, steer... is just beyond the way my brain can comprehend moving a game controller. I am sooo Atari 2600 generation, y'all. Anyway, I told him not to be too sad, seeing that, as it's my DRIVE. It's the same way I learned to play the piano as a child. I'd mess up my fingering, slam my fists on the keys, and then take a breath and start again until I got it exactly right. Which I always, eventually, would. Same approach, decades later. I don't mind it.)

ANYWAY...

So, I'm enjoying seeing the similarity in the way I approach my work-work *and* my play-work, as well as my workouts. Very interesting and revealing.

And, it would seem, efficient.

20 chapters in the hands of proofers already (and the first ones only went over on Monday). I am right on schedule with this book (assuming no days off between now and the 15th, when the last three chapters go to the proofer patrol and I begin entering changes based on their feedback).

Woo!

(Oh, and the bull-run game left me in a pool of TEARS from laughing so hard, last night. It really is silly and fun and stupid and hilarious. Especially when I body-check Keith's bull with my bull's butt.)

Okay, so now for the second thing.

HOW CUTE ARE WE?!?

This is me with Rockstar Intern Julie at Showcaser Karaoke on July 27th. CLEARLY, we are up to something and someone doesn't want us caught at it. (But Kimberly caught us anyway. She's good like that.)

HOWL!

This photo just says SO MUCH and I love it all! :)

Okay, back to work!

Posted by bonnie at 4:17 PM | Comments (1)

July 18, 2008

Catching Up

I keep feeling like I'm trying to catch up.

On so much.

Not in the hectic, running, omigod I'm crazy kind of way. Just in that, "Wow! There is a LOT going on and I keep NOT blogging about it," kind of way. I blame Twitter.

Today is the day I officially dove into production on the third edition of Self-Management for Actors. I have six weeks to work on it, then it's off to the printer just after Labor Day in order to hit stores and Amazon.com in October (on schedule. Well... on NEW schedule. Already blew the first deadline, as y'all may recall). Bless my Proofer Patrol!

I'm really excited about this new edition and all of the fabulous new essays contributed from working actors, demo reel editors, managers, agents, fellow casting directors, directors, and producers. It's gonna be awesome. That whole new section on "Advanced SMFA" is going to rock. Just have to get the dang thing written! ;) Okay, so I'm on it.

Also changing my daily schedule quite a bit by adding so much Wii Fit to the day. It's wonderful. I love it. I'm so sore in so many great places and I just feel amazing. I'll share "results" in a week or so, but I can already tell this is a great idea. ;) I'm not saying midnight visits to the gym don't work, but I'm a heck of a lot more motivated to sweat with these challenges than with the silly machines at the gym.

Gonna play with the July showcasers this weekend and next. I love this group! They're so warm and passionate and wonderful. :) All showcase alumni are welcome, but both weekends' events are probably going to be most heavily populated by the most recent showcasers. That's always the way. ;)

I'll be hosting an event for the SAG Foundation with Minnie Driver and Jeremy Renner next week. That should be fun. Also taking meetings with some "corporate future planner type people" next week regarding the next couple of years in the Cricket Feet, Inc., gameplan. Probably not going to cast something I thought I would like to cast (because I'd simply rather not. Weird), and I'm happy for the time to devote to the book.

No spa vacation next week as planned. Used half the spa money for the Wii Fit/Wii bundle and general life stuff. (No. Not a new iPhone. Nancy is doing just fine, thank you).

I'm sleepy.

This has been a boring blog entry. It's summertime. What can I say?

Posted by bonnie at 7:25 PM | Comments (0)

April 22, 2008

Welcome to my world.

Occasionally (okay, I'll be honest: FREQUENTLY) Keith has to stop me from writing any given week's column about the ridiculousity that is my collective inbox.

Y'see, I cast these cool indie films. And, while I get that most casting directors do the "very inaccessible" thing, it's because I *also* happen to produce showcases and write the aforementioned columns, plus the books, and do the speaking engagements that I pretty much cannot be inaccessible. My *other* jobs rely on knowing what's going on with actors, being reachable, being *gulp* willing to read such stuffs.

So, tonight, while enjoying a glass of wine and wondering if I did the world a disservice by cleaning up the atrocious spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors in this week's column's email, I toodled upon this post, by a fella whose book is being cast as a movie these days (Go, Joseph Middleton, with your bad-ass self! And congrats to the writer!), and my eyes glazed over, much in the way they do DAILY at several given points.

And then I realized, it wouldn't matter if I were to write a column about this sort of email. I'll continue to get dozens of them a day. DOZENS. Among the hundreds of emails I get per day--many of which are just fine and dandy, and some of which I actually find time to answer--there are these emails that make me wonder why I don't have unlisted contact information.

In fact, I spoke with a manager today who was pitching three actors on one of the films I'm casting and she said, "I think I called your cell first."

When I told her, "I don't have a cell," she was SHOCKED.

"I have an iPhone, but I don't have the phone set up. I use it for email," I told her.

"What?!?" she asked. "What if someone needs you?!?"

"Someone always needs me," I replied. "And I check email hourly, so if they really need me--and I believe them--I'll call them back after I see their email about the emergency. But the problem is, everyone thinks their BS is an emergency. And have you seen how many projects I'm working on? Do you realize how many producers, directors, writers, agents, managers, publicists, and actors are certain that they have an emergency situation happening? Believe me. The ONLY way I get *any* down time--and I don't get a lot--is because I have no cell phone. The number you called was my husband's. Because 70% of the time, I'm with him. So if someone is SURE they need me, they have to weather the Keith to get to me. And that's about as good as my having no cell phone at all, frankly."

She laughed like crazy.

But, whether I had a cell phone or made my home phone unlisted or whatever, what would it matter? It's all gonna keep comin', no matter what I try to do to stop it.

So, when I want to write a column about the actors who call me, email me, fax me, FedEx me, anything me to try and find out "how to submit on my projects" when I FLIPPIN' PUT THE DAMN THINGS OUT ON ACTORS ACCESS, WHERE EVERYONE ON THE PLANET CAN SUBMIT, DUDE, I guess it's nice to have someone in my life who reminds me that THAT is not a column. It's a rant. It's, at best, a blog post.

Because--just like the idiot who takes up two parking spaces out in front of my house, when he could just as easily pull up two feet to allow another car to park behind him--there will always be people who JUST DON'T GET IT. And they wouldn't think you were giving THEM a tip, no matter how much you made it all about them, anyway.

*sigh*

(For what it's worth, I got about three sentences farther in to the post than Tucker Max did. I'm patient like that.)

Posted by bonnie at 11:21 PM | Comments (6)

January 18, 2008

Is It True?

Do we set out on a path for "who we are" in high school and determine our own fate when we're too young to even decide on a haircolor or an elective or a boyfriend and then that's just who we are?

I ask this both because this is the theme of one of the films I'm currently casting and because I recently reconnected with someone who totally remembered me from high school (who I, sadly, have to admit, I don't *really* remember, although she totally looks familiar to me) and she said, "I always knew you'd make it in Hollywood. But I really thought you'd be an actor."

And I remember an encounter with my high school best friend (after our ten-year reunion) in which he said every time he sees Julia Roberts on screen, he screams because he knows I could do it better if I would just get my shit together and do it.

(It's good that he said this, as it caused me to drop out of grad school and move to LA to give acting one more shot, at which point I became very sure acting was not my dream anymore, but dangit, wouldn't you know I'd grow up to become a writer and casting director of all things. Oh, and be really happy with all that.)

But my point in posting this is that I'm remembering this guy from high school. His name is Steve. In our senior yearbook (no, Alex, I'm not telling "that story" yet. Heh heh) he listed, in the "clubs and activities" section, one thing.

"420."

And at our ten-year reunion, in that little, "What have you been doing since graduation?" booklet (the one in which I wrote about traveling the world, going to grad school, working in the recording industry in Hollywood and in college radio in Athens, and having the Barbra-Streisand-turned-Oprah-Winfrey pipe dream), Steve wrote one thing.

"420."

So, we're coming up on our 20-year reunion. (And I say "we" knowing full well that I won't be going anywhere near Fulton County or North Springs High School in 2008 without having dropped a good 50 pounds and having scored a much better StarMeter ranking.)

Just wondering. What do you think Steve will say in his update this time around?

Are we THAT close to "who we will always be" in high school?

Posted by bonnie at 11:42 PM | Comments (9)

January 10, 2008

Random

So I'm watching the episode of Seinfeld in which James Spader comes 'round and gets all "step nine" on everyone, apologizing for the wrongs, as he works his 12-step program. And I'm reminded of a time a couple of years ago when someone (once) very close to me came 'round and got all "step nine" with me, apologizing for all sorts of things that I just thought were parts of our fractured relationship. Turns out he was an addict and I had no idea to what degree.

That was really meaningful. Still is. I didn't need an apology. I thought we had a pretty dang good relationship for the kids that we were. But it's nice to know the power of, "I know that I hurt you. And for that, I am sorry."

* * *

Next up... I joined the Twitter. Not sure I'm loving the straight-to-the-BonBlogs updates just yet, as a few of those in a row and my pretty, graphics-included blog posts are bumped off the main page, making the BonBlogs' landing pad not look so lovely. But does anyone visit the BonBlogs "proper" anymore? Is this all just read via RSS nowadays? So the Twittering is welcome?

Here's a cute Twitter-related graphic I found. Just goes to show that I'm generally a year or two behind everyone, on these tech trends. That makes me old, right? Remember when I used to be an early adopter? Damn late-30s.

* * *

Have I mentioned that I am totally overwhelmed and humbled by the resumés we've received from AMAZING directors for the 2008 Cricket Feet Showcase season? I mean, WOW.

* * *

I am feeling ridiculously self-righteous over how many "Common Errors in English Usage" in the page-a-day calendar I treated myself to for Christmas I "win" on. It's a movie premiere, idjits! Not a premier. The "t" in often is not pronounced. A character cannot be one-dimensional. Oh, lordy, this is going to be a fun year! (Until I hit that run of a few pages in which I'm proven wrong about something grammatical. That'll suck. Heh.)

* * *

I am currently wearing a shirt that will be thrown away the next time I take it off. I bought it in 1990 when I worked at the GAP and sold all of those cool T-shirts to Michael Stipe before the MTV VMAs in which he took one off for each trip to the mic to pick up an award. It will make me sad to lose this shirt. But c'mon... an 18-year-old shirt? Really?

* * *

I am officially a crotchety old woman. I actually emailed the local news channel to tell them their lady news anchor needs to take off the jangly, bangly bracelets she's wearing while flailing her arms about, delivering the news. Sorry, kids, that's Microphone 101. But the fact that I have now emailed this exact comment to two different local news channels within three weeks is... well... disturbing. I think I'm turning into--not my mother--my grandmother. She once called up the local Toyota dealership because their mascot dog was sitting on the hood of a car and said, "I wouldn't buy one of your cars with that mangy ol' dog's clawmarks all over the paintjob."

Next week, that dog (Mr. Toyota) was sitting on a MAT on the hood of that car.

Go, Cleo.

* * *

That is all.

Posted by bonnie at 11:22 PM | Comments (11)

November 17, 2007

A Story I've Never Told

No... this isn't the "how I almost didn't graduate from high school" story. That's comin'. Not today. ;)

This is the "why Con Air is one of my favorite movies" story.

I know I know... WTF, right? I mean, it's Con Air. It starred Nicholas Cage doing the worst southern accent ever and--of course--the future Mr. Bonnie Gillespie, AKA John Cusack, as a sandal-wearing federal marshal. And, well, it was just BAD, as movies go.

Okay, I grant you all of that. It was a total dick flick. BUT... I happened to go see this movie at the dollar cinema on Alps in Athens after having had, well, the most non-boy day ever.

See, I have a cousin who is a midwife. (By the way, if I should ever choose to have a child, the midwife thing is about the coolest thing EVER. And I now know this for a fact.) And for a few years between Tracy's life in the ATL and Tracy's life in Hawaii, there was Tracy's life in Athens. And that was some of my favorite time, as a grad student at UGA.

(PS--Go, DAWGS!)

Anyway, Tracy used to come home from work and talk about the various issues she faced as a midwife at county. The phrase: "It was an exploding vagina day" rings in my memory. Egad!

But, I learned a lot, listening to my health-care-giver family member. A friend I trusted (and continue to trust). Someone who is adjacent to coochies every day. I mean, damn. Right?

Okay, so something I had never experienced, being "an only child" (who wasn't really an only child, but who was born a full 16 and 18 years, respectively, after her *planned* male siblings), was the whole "sister having a baby" thing. I mean, sure, each of my sisters-in-law had babies, but I wasn't invited in for that show (and why would I be, not even being old enough to babysit said kids, right?).

So, when my cousin Tracy invited me to shadow her for a day's work at Athens Regional Medical Center, I figured, "What the Hell!"

I put on scrubs. I signed in. I waited for hours and hours and hours. And nothing happened. Nothing.

Tracy assured me that there would be babies. There would be emergencies. But it was like life... you couldn't really predict when and what.

So, I hung out. Got to know the other midwives (girly-boys and girls). Began to understand these people who spent years of schooling--at great expense--only to basically give their time away at county and go home at the end of the day, needing hooch and good friends like me on the porch (another-another story to come later) to toast them for their thankless life-saving or--at bare minimum--coochie-healing.

And then, after ten hours of hanging out (and as a gal who don' sleep much, that's never an issue), I was called to emergency--thrice--and there were three "may not make it" babies delivered in 50 minutes. And I was there for all of 'em. One didn't make it. One made it just fine. Another made it with special help. And I learned something from all of it.

There was the 17-year-old with her boyfriend and his family. Balloons. A party.
There was the Hindi woman who would only allow me to be there because I was "a female teacher" and that was sacred to her.
There was the 40-something woman whose 13th child would be born prematurely. And dead.

I got to see an episiotomy. An epidural. A natural childbirth.

I got to experience all of the sounds and smells of this world. And I still own the scrubs I wore.

But the point of this blog post is this: I left the hospital, after having experienced more estrogen in 50 minutes than I've probably felt course through me before or since, and felt the need to reboot.

Not to have a drink.
Not to get laid.
Not to meet my posse at the Engine Room and throw darts 'til dawn.

I needed more testosterone than I had ever experienced.

And Con Air was showing at the dollar movie.

So, I paid my buck, sat there amongst the frat boys and their dutiful girlfriends, and--in my scrubs--watched Con Air and decided it was one of the best movies I had ever seen.

And tonight, I watch it rerunning on some local channel--even with the "bad words" edited out--and I love it exactly the same.

It reminds me that there is such a thing as hormonal balance in life. And isn't it weird that I still value that? I mean, aren't I knockin' around at the expiration date on my ability to have chillens?

Eh, it makes me ever-grateful that I married a man who has a son. Therefore, I have a stepson. And that kid loves me like crazy and I'm thrilled that that is true. Yeah, even Quinn wants me to be knocked up when he comes to live with us in a couple of years (a seed I'm sure his dad planted in him, but whatevz), but I'm just so very happy that I appreciate the reproduction that happens because it's s'posed'ta.

If it's gonna, it will.

And I'll get to any of mine when/if the time is right. Put the bunny back, the bad-southern-accented boy said. ;) Ah, the irony!

And that's the story of one of my favorite movies ever.

I know. Right?

Posted by bonnie at 4:30 AM | Comments (5)

October 10, 2007

My Mom's Tooth

I remember my brother being ridiculed by my mother for having stolen a car and getting in a head-on collision when he was a teenager, messing up the work those braces had done.

(When your parents are Depression-era, you're constantly reminded that it cost a hell of a lot to do things like fix your teeth.)

Sure, Mom was happy he lived through the crash (and Daddy was more mad about the car), but she was absolutely certain, from then on, that his "bad teeth" had everything to do with having wrecked his face.

My brother assured the family that genetics are a strong thing and that all he had was exactly his version of "Mom's tooth" that juts out and turns, just for fun. Of course, Mom was certain that it was the fault of teenage recklessness and that alone--as further evidenced by the fact that I had braces and, therefore, did NOT have that jutted out tooth. The end. Car wreck = messed up teeth. No car wreck = perfect teeth. Thank you, braces.

So, tonight I'm looking in the mirror and I see this tooth. It is my mother's tooth. Absolutely, positively, 100% my mother's tooth... right there on the right side of my mouth.

And I wore my braces and didn't total a car and even wore my retainer as directed by the orthodontist, well into my late teens.

But. I know this about my mother: If she were still alive right now, she would look at my mouth and say that I didn't treasure the gift that was the orthodontic experience she provided--as a single parent strapped for cash, grateful for the subsidized lunch program that allowed me to eat at least one full meal each day (even though it was usually a sloppy joe or fish sticks or overdone greenbeans with a slab of ham)--and that I clearly wasn't wearing my retainer for as many years as that damn thing would fit me.

And then my brother would enjoy being right.

I and then--and only then--I would say to my mom, "Y'know, you're right. If I had worn my retainer more, my teeth would still be straight."

That's what siblings are all about. Then, now, and forever.

Posted by bonnie at 12:05 AM | Comments (1)

September 28, 2007

Friend Shui (or "Why I Disabled Messaging at MySpace")

Okay, so I love The MySpace. Love it. I was very late to the party, but haven't ever regretted showing up for it.

Benefits have included nearly tripling readership of my weekly column, reconnecting with some of my longest-lost friends, landing on the radar of international media outlets, and being able to communicate directly with actors who are up for projects I'm casting without always having to go through their people.

But.

I already get hundreds of emails per day. Hundreds. They. Never. Stop.

And MySpace messaging has spiraled out of control for this chica. About 65% of the messages I receive are from actors looking for advice I've already spelled out--in great detail--at my column. And since it seems that few (very, very few) people actually consult my FAQ before reaching out, I am forced to either ignore the bulk of the messages or answer in the form of sending someone to read my FAQ or columns.

Think I'm being ungrateful for the love? Absolutely not! I am not at all having any kind of problem with the fact that people want to ask for my advice. It's the... other stuff... that gets me less excited to log in at my MySpace account.

Examples.

Hey Bon,
I know we've never met. I desperately need an agent. Please watch my reel and tell me to whom you'll be recommending me. This is urgent.

Hi,
Can you look at the 200 proofs from my recent photo shoot and help me choose a headshot? I've read your series of articles on headshots and find the advice good but useless for my particular situation. I need your help one-on-one.

Help me join SAG. You're my only hope!

Yo,
You haven't answered my messages. What the hell is wrong with you? You act all accessible but clearly it's all just an image you're trying to project. I've sent you five messages in two days and you haven't gotten back to me. You suck. I'm reporting you to the BBB as a fraud. Your book sucks.

All 100% true-story messages (but with better grammar and spelling, because I can't flippin' bring myself to recreate some of the more mind-numbingly bizarre elements of these messages).

Point is... 65% of the messages I get range from wholly inappropriate to flat-out presumptuous and rude.

So, I learned how to disable messaging for non-friends at MySpace. (As Brendan knows, this was a banner day for me. Cut way, way, WAY down on the volume of stuff. Awesome.)

But that's only taking care of the majority of the messages. There's still another bunch of stuff coming in that I'd rather have come through... well... anywhere else. Like, via email at my column, via comments at my MySpace page, via comments at the BonBlogs, or via email at any of the various accounts I have set up to deal with things like showcase-related correspondence, casting stuff, speaking engagements, or books I've written.

Dang, y'all, I'm OPEN. I'm WAY accessible. Especially when you consider the sheer volume of stuff coming my way.

(Someone recently asked why I don't do speaking engagements at such-and-such facility. I was stunned. I'm like, "Uh... is it not enough that I'm at SAG once a week most weeks? That I'm somewhere out there speaking to groups of actors all over town--usually at places where actors needn't spend a penny to be there--already? You just need me to be at this particular place because it's your favorite? Uh... no. Not looking to add places to the itinerary. Thanks.")

So, I guess this is like the same thing, but in terms of ones and zeroes. Friend Shui. Optimizing the accessibility. Working smarter. (We've covered this before.)

Thank you thank you thank you for your understanding.

And for those who want to turn this into anything other than what it is, well, I guess I just have to start getting okay with being misunderstood sometimes. It's certainly not going to get easier as we continue in this direction.

*sigh*

There's a reason I say: If I had known how popular going into casting would make me, I would've done it in high school. But getting used to this level of sought-outtedness in my 30s is okay too. ;) Thanks, y'all. LYMI!!

Posted by bonnie at 6:43 AM | Comments (3)

September 26, 2007

Oh, how I love Thursday!

I know, I know... Thursday isn't here yet... but I already love it. Why?

Well, for one, it's the first day in a dozen or so in which I don't HAVE TO leave the house. Woo! Yay! Yippee!!

AND! As much as I love my rockstar intern Julie, she will not be helping out tomorrow, and that means I also have a totally bra-free day!!!!!!!!

Yay, Thursday! Yay!

(I know. Sometimes it is the little things. No I'm not saying my boobs are little. Dear gawd no. You get my point.)

Posted by bonnie at 11:12 PM | Comments (2)

September 25, 2007

I Don't Like:

Bad dreams.
The new DirecTV TiVo craptastic device.
People with no sense of personal boundaries.

I Do Like:

Compliments from people I respect and admire.
The contents of my iPod.
Making up words.

The end.

Oh... wait... and I am endlessly amused by the house on the 101. Endlessly.

NOW the end.

Posted by bonnie at 11:24 PM | Comments (1)

September 21, 2007

Rain Is Here

They've been talking about rain coming for days now. And it is here. Yay!

Click for Pier Cam

Funny thing about having cats and living in a place where it never rains. They aren't like my kick-ass kitty from back in Georgia was (that'd be Muffy, who lived to be 18, y'all--my longest long-term relationship, for damn sure). He would deal with the thunderstorms, flood warnings, even tornado watch alerts. Tough cookie. He was like, "Oh, yeah. That's that stuff. Pff."

These kitties... these, princess-delicate California kitties (even though two of 'em *did* live in the North Georgia Mountains for a year or so before moving here)... well, they're clinging to me like we're enduring "the end of days." They don't understand why the sky is different. The sounds are different. The smells are different.

So cute, these princesses.

To celebrate the end of this crazy week, I shall pour myself a lovely pomegranate martini. Thank you to my lovely casting helper from a couple of weeks ago, Andrea, who brought me this Pama Liqueur when she learned I couldn't have gluten (I think she was originally planning on pastries of some sort).

Hee! Congrats, Keith, on your Clint Eastwood audition. That's a damn good day. Oh... and GO DAWGS! That is all. Happy weekend, everyone! XO

Posted by bonnie at 5:49 PM | Comments (1)

September 20, 2007

Blogging... I just ain't in the mood.

I keep thinking I'll get it up for a blog post but I've seriously got a whole lotta nuthin' to say right now.

What a useless blog post, huh?

Eh.

All is well. Just not in a bloggy place.

Oh, and why is it that the little MySpace face for "cold" looks so sad? Who are you to tell me that I'm sad about being cold? I like being cold. It's much better than being hot. Beach living rules and I love the "need an extra blanket" nights in September. I'm not sad.

PS--I love "premiere week" (weeks?) on TV. Goodness, this is fun!

PPS--New (excellent) book for gym reading is already a third finished in one session. Dangit. I really need to read slower.

Posted by bonnie at 9:43 PM | Comments (1)

September 4, 2007

Okay, so...

No news. Sorry.

However, I did grab some balls and call Mr. Superagent at 6:45pm (after having spent a good part of the day on the phone with a good many other superagent types--closing deals on The Kitty Landers Show pilot--which got me thinking, "Why am I so weirded out about this? I talk to these cats ALL the time. Call him. Yes, again. Just do it," right as an email from MCJ--HBTY, MCJ--came in, making me sure it was a sign I needed to make the call).

Highlights of the conversation:

• I want to get everybody on board.


• You need a team to get behind you.


• Everyone has been out with the holiday and I'm out tomorrow so...


• I was very impressed with you at our meeting.


• You have great energy.


• You've got a great shop set up already.


• We need to take you to the Debbie Zane level.


• Call me Thursday after I've talked to the whole team.

So. There it is. Whatevz.

Continued thanks for all of the lovely vibes y'all continue to send.

It's hot.

• TiVo has overheated and shut down.
• Can no longer upload things via Fetch (and can't get new 'puter 'til October due to the cool new stuff Apple's announcing tomorrow--but I do love my Mighty Mouse. A lot).
• I love, love, LOVE our A/C. (It is at its best when one foot away from me and pointed right down my shirt.)
• My neighbor smokes the most funky, skunk-like weed I have ever smelled (not that I know a lot about that stuff, but this seriously smells like skunkbutt. His parents must be so proud).
• My future Mr. Superagent is a UCLA fan. We almost came to blows when I gloated about the UGA game on the phone just now. C'mon! It's not like he's a *shudder* Gator or something vile like that! I think we'll be able to work it out.

(I know, that's a Ga. Tech Yellow Jacket... it's what I had local. Y'know.)

Woof!

PS--Visit Julia's site for a very cool "spied a funny T-shirt" post. PPS--Also came across this while looking for superagent-related images. Weird, huh?

Posted by bonnie at 7:43 PM | Comments (4)

August 25, 2007

Quickies

1. Balls of Fury is exactly the movie you expect it to be. The 14-year-old boy in me loved, loved, loved it. The guest of the Hong family in me really enjoyed how much camera time brilliant character actor James Hong got. The on-the-rise casting director was thrilled to be introduced to the film's director (Ben Garant) as, "a wonderful casting director and producer to watch."

(There will be more photos to come... including one in which James "approaches me" with a paddle. *tee hee*)

Anyway, it was a great honor to be their guest and spend the day at the red carpet thingy. Really fun. Brought home a pair of Balls of Fury tighty-whities for Keith. As it should be.

2. Still blushing from the Joseph Mailander review, I come across this. My NBF Kevin Charnas had this nice thing to say:

Bonnie Gillespie was adorable and hysterical. And I wanted to run up and hug her...and not in a pervie way. Although, if my peep accidentally rubbed up against her, it wouldn't have been a tragedy.

Heeeeeeeeee! Oh, how I LOVE these blogger friends I've made! Such *very* cool people (and not just because they adore ME, but c'mon, that's fun too)! Heeeeeeee!

3. Will spend most of Sunday writing Monday's column on the particular issues minority actors face (Thank goodness for the wonderful bounty of feedback last week's request begging yielded!) and scheduling actors' auditions for the November 2007 showcase.

4. My chest hurts. Sun poisoning is not cool.

5. If it's possible, I'm more excited about the November showcase than either of the other two, at this point (meaning, the pre-audition excitement is like WAY super-overwhelming right now, just based on who's coming in on this).

(Yeah, number five could've gone with number three, technically, but I'm tired and wanted five and couldn't come up with anything clever to say. Clearly. *yawn* I think I need some sleep. Yeah. I'll dream of ping-pong, I'm sure.)

Posted by bonnie at 11:32 PM | Comments (1)

August 9, 2007

Dear Middle-Aged Balding Entitled A-hole at El Cholo,

You don't know me.

If you're lucky, you'll never actually know me, because I will make your life hell. And it's not because I dislike you. It's because I find you to be just about the lowest form of being there is, and--sadly--because you're White and Gainfully Employed and living in the place that values your kind over all others--you're also valued by people who (if they really thought about it) would spit on you. Not because spitting is cool. But because you are the king of what is wrong with this place.

So, I have already had a big conversation with myself about what it means that I'm seeing this crap (because I believe that what we see is a reflection of our reality and that concept makes me sad because OMG, if this guy represents my reality I'm in big-ass trouble), but I figure my brain needed to entertain this foolishness and share it with y'all just to cleanse the palate for better things. Believe me, just about anything is gonna be better.

So, we're at El Cholo, finally using a gift card Keith received from a lovely friend of ours for having done computer work (which he so rocks at) to have a proper date, which is well deserved. It's Thursday. It's a little packed. We've been at our patio table for an hour or so and when another table clears out, an elderly man and woman head over from the bar area to the patio table. IMPORTANT NOTE: There is no wait list for the patio. It's the honor system. Only if you want a table inside do you put your name on a list and get one of those cute little red-blinky vibrating "your table is ready" indicators.

As Ma and Pa Kettle amble over to the now-vacant table, MABEA (Middle-Aged Balding Entitled A-hole) rushes over--cute little red-blinky vibrating "your table is ready" indicator (NOT GOING OFF) in hand--screaming, "Hey! We were first! We've been waiting! That table is OURS! You get up!" His two other MAB (maybe/maybe not EA) friends swarm nearby, and the octogenarians, looking appalled at this jaggoffery, get up and move back into the bar area, figuring they must've done something wrong.

Of course, I want to run over and say, "You're not doing anything wrong! He's an asshole!" And then I realize, in a life more than twice the length of mine, they've surely seen many an asshole and know that's what they're seeing. I don't need to point that mess out. I should just continue enjoying my date.

But then...

Dinner is over for the MABEA and his MAB friends. Keith and I are still enjoying our date. Yeah... we hang out a long time. We drink. We talk. We flirt. We work. It's good.

Anyway, MABEA and his friends head over to the valet and MABEA sees a very lovely young lady returning to her beau at another patio table. He stops and watches her ass. Like SERIOUSLY takes in her ass as if it exists for him and him alone. Because that's not enough assholery here in front of the patioful of observers, he collects the fellow MAB with a cheesy '70s mustache (as opposed to the fat one) and tells him to act as if he's saying something to him. No, no... he's not saying anything. He's giving him an over-the-shoulder view of the juicy ass (which is no longer in clear view, as the lovely lady has sat down with her beau to continue their date). Mustache MAB is less amused by this than MABEA seems to be, who heads back to valet tugging on his nutsack while talking loudly about how much he would "hit that shit" if not for the (certainly, happy) wife he's got waiting back home for his sloppy, drunken, middle-aged balding entitled a-hole kisses.

*shudder*

Anyway. My point is, hello. Yes. I saw you. I let your vibe interrupt a good ten minutes of my date tonight. And you suck. You can expect a character based upon you in a future script coming your way soon. This will not be a compliment, despite the fact that you might want to take it that way.

You are a special kind of broken. And sadly, your credit rating is better than mine. There is something seriously wrong with that.

That is all.

Posted by bonnie at 10:51 PM | Comments (3)

July 6, 2007

fun stuff (a BB exclusive)

I'm on the Oxy campus (sitting b/w the fountain + gym steps--where Brandon used to show up to flirt w/ Lucinda Nicholson or to tutor D'shon Hardell), way early for my speaking gig this morning.

I am endlessly amused by the 90210 exteriors + entertained by hummingbirds dive-bombing one another.

Drive to Eagle Rock was insanely speedy.

Quinn + his dad are out w/ "Aunt Liz" and Adam. Man, I wish that kid didn't have to go so soon. We have the BEST time.

Reporting from the still-unnamed BlackBerry, I'm days-away-from-37-Bon. ;)
--
Bonnie Gillespie (via BlackBerry)
http://cricketfeet.com
http://more.showfax.com/columns/avoice

"If I had known how popular going into casting would make me, I would've done it in high school."

Posted by bonnie at 8:38 AM | Comments (3)

June 27, 2007

"Did you get what you wanted?"

My mother was a complicated woman. I mean, she was simple (like most Depression-era kids were), she saved everything, she always worried she was being abandoned or undervalued, and she was also really smart. And maybe that's where it got complicated.

It would've been so easy for her to have just been broken and country. But instead, she was also fiercely intelligent. And she did groundbreakingly cool stuff in the field of Esoteric Astrology. But being country, she was embarrassed when Oprah asked her to join John Gray and Iyanla Vanzant in the late '90s when she was doing the "honor your spirit" series. She was sure she'd be judged and called a fool.

Cut to a decade later and her simple-but-smart daughter feels all sorts of personal turmoil and wonders how much of it is inherited and how much of it is learned and--most importantly--how much of it has to stick around a moment more. Oh, how I love being in my "nine year." Those of you reading who don't know numerology, pardon the shorthand. But I'm actually thrilled, because the first half of 2007 has been all about seeing evidence of what I don't want to take with me into my next nine years. And the keepers headed forward with me... wow. I'm just thrilled. (And really eager to get going with the purging of the other stuff.)

Beautiful, brilliant, lovely, goddess-like Frances Uku reminded me yesterday that there is value to cutting off what isn't working. That it is hard to make the break, but that in the end our personal strength comes from our ability to show up and give (which means that sometimes we DON'T give).

So, I think back to a year ago, when I joined the MySpace (which turned out to be a great idea, since doing so--and then promoting stuffs there--more than tripled my column's readership) and ceased visiting all online forums whose moderator didn't send up a flare asking for my attention. (Believe me, I had been all over the 'net. So paring down to about nothing was a huge cut.)

But now, it seems that it's time for me to make another cut. I've had to bring on more helping hands than I ever thought I'd need. So, maybe I need to do another round of "gotta go's". Be less accessible. Yeah, the idea makes me shudder (and I'm not sure that I can actually do it), but perhaps self-preservation is the theme for the end of my 9 year.

Anyway, I think back to one of the last things my mom said to me before she passed away. I was in the kitchen with my stepdad and one of my brothers, crying over how I'd been--yet again--lied to and screwed over by another family member. Mom--fading in and out from a room away--asked what I was crying about and I said, "Momma, don't worry. It's the same old so-and-so bullshit it's always been." And she asked the same question she'd asked anytime I wanted to be upset about that family drama.

Did you get what you wanted?

And this is when I stopped crying and said, "Y'know what? I did. Thanks, Mom. You're right." I got past the emotion I was feeling and embraced the fact that--even though I got hurt along the way--I got what I wanted out of the encounter (in this case, a ride to the airport, after having commuted home to be with my dying mother; the fact that I had to deal with the bullshit baggage that had nothing to do with me meant nothing, in the final analysis).

All this to say, another round of cuts is coming. I love being accessible. I love answering questions and being available and building up my readership through my posts and creating "brand loyalty" through having such a transparent process in all things. But maybe I now understand that there are parts of the job that require inaccessibility. Maybe it's okay to be full-on out of touch.

Then, when I am in touch, it's a seriously big deal. And it's a choice made from where I'm supposed to be--not where I *think* I'm supposed to be, being all filled with perfectionism.

Hmm. Something to consider, as I move into the "taking better care of me" part of my nine year. And next year, when I ask myself, "Did you get what you wanted?" perhaps I'll be okay with the being called a snooty bitch, which has already started happening.

As Uku mentioned: "The best thing you can do is step out of the ring. It can be hard when you are a naturally helpful person. There are plenty people who appreciate your time and insights. Unfortunately they don't make as much noise!"

So... I'll come back around to answer the question: "Did you get what you wanted?" at some point. And today the want is this: HAPPY.

Posted by bonnie at 1:49 AM | Comments (8)

June 26, 2007

Am I a "Rules" girl?

No. I am not a "Rules" girl. I never did that whole "don't accept a date for Saturday if it's requested after Wednesday" or "no sleeping with him 'til after X amount of time" or whatever (seriously, I don't even know exactly what The Rules are, just that they all looked ridiculous when I skimmed them when the book came out years and years ago).

But I *am* a "Susie Policy" kind of girl.

I actually believe, when IMDB or MySpace has a system for fixing problems (see pages 2 and 6 of this thread and/or pages 4 and 5 of this thread for my take on 'em), that that's good enough. And getting worked up over how fair or unfair the system is just a waste of energy.

And when drama comes up, I'm one to remain solution-oriented and focused: "That's great. I hear you. Now how do we fix this so that we can get on with the work?" And what I have low tolerance for is folks who get in my way while I'm working.

I've never understood the need to wallow in the drama. I've never been one to have a conversation that didn't involve how to improve a condition. And people who look for ways to complain, bitch about unfairness, or vent instead of working on a solution to the problem simply baffle me.

Yes, I vent. And when I'm done letting off steam, I am GO for takeoff on fixing the situation, leaving it better than I found it. And if it's not fixable, I'm out. I'm not going to sit around complaining while trying to find workarounds when there are direct routes that get the job done just fine.

I guess I just don't understand creating "movements" to "right injustices" that don't seem to exist. I'm a by-the-books kind of gal and if I don't like the way some system works, I don't try to make sure everyone else sees the flaws... I channel that energy into creating a new system that works better for me (and maybe for everyone else).

When I speak to groups of actors, I hear things like, "So, you're saying I need to do this in order to book more work?" And that question just blows me away.

NO.

I am NEVER saying that doing ANY one thing is going to result in ANY other thing, as far as this business goes. It's an unpredictable, unfair, illogical, irrational, fickle, ridiculous business. And I love it. LOVE it.

If there were a pill you could take to make you book more work, I'd have developed it and I'd sell it and I could retire from doing the harder work I do every day.

I guess I just don't understand the mindset that has some folks ignoring the hard work they could be doing in order to get better results and instead looking for ways to fight the system over things they're never going to control (and which don't have anything to do with their success in life anyway).

*sigh*

What do I know?

Oh! I know what I know! This particular Mercury retrograde has been excessively ass-kicking to the highest order.

And our UPS lady has a crush on me.

That is all.

Posted by bonnie at 5:32 PM | Comments (0)

May 31, 2007

I'm all kinds of grateful.

AKA: "Why I love my life today" (without images; sorry).

In five days, I've been on the mic in front of hundreds of people (live; many thousands or more otherwise) both as host and guest of some very Whoprah-like speaking engagements, plus a pilot for The Hollywood Reporter (yes, it's true; the gig that's been in the works for a year now is finally lifting off... and making it an on-camera version is sooo much cooler than writing it up. And no, I can't say more than that just yet).

In 15 or so hours, I'll be in the midst of auditions for the next Cricket Feet Showcase, which I honestly could cast based on submissions alone at this point (seriously, we have some amazing actors in the mix and I cannot wait to get them up and working in front of my favorite industry friends).

I'm exhausted. I'm overworked. I'm sad to miss my hubby for a few weeks while he goes on location to shoot a film (but I'm excited for him and this cool new gig... also excited for all of the silliness I can get into with my friends while he's away... *hee*). I'm totally entertained by the fact that gender is a stronger factor than species, where Archie and Keith are concerned (yes, my boys of different species are exactly alike). My cousin is in O Magazine (page 75, for June) and I'm so very proud of her. Gave copies of my books to my favorite maître d' tonight and blushed three shades of red when he asked me to inscribe them for him. My new best friends are Lee Garlington and JoBeth Williams. In that order. Our new logo for Cricket Feet, Inc., will roll out in time for our fifth anniversary as an entertainment corporation (July, 2007) and it's freakin' gorgeous (thank you, Communicatrix). I'm hoppin' up and down with excitement for rollin' that mess out. It's a load of greatness. You will all love it. I promise. It will touch you in that special way. (Not creepy... you perv!) ;) Hee!

Oh, my goodness! I'm just so very happy and grateful and pleased and filled with grace and happiness and love. It absolutely does not suck to be me right now. Not even a little bit.

PS--I look like a goddess in my new favorite blouse. Girls are lovely and well-represented. *sigh* I'm so freakin' easy to amuse. ;)

Posted by bonnie at 1:47 AM | Comments (5)

May 23, 2007

Okay, so now I'm pissed!

One of the things I do to try and limit my MySpace time (because, seriously, it can be a time-suck beyond all others) is log in around 11:35pm and force myself to log out before midnight.

I love it. Because I'm in, I'm out... I get it all done, and I'm logged out and no longer "online now" (well, I guess that doesn't really count, since those little indicators stay lit way beyond when you actually log out and I could turn those off in my preferences if I really wanted that to be the way I limited my MySpace time), and most importantly, my little "last logged on" thingy says I was last logged on the day before (since I tend to hit "logout" at 11:59pm and change).

It works for me. Keeps me on-task. Gives me just enough time to hit the MySpace, approve the friend requests (and enjoy watching the ever-increasingly amusing race between my friends and my comments for the big 3000 mark), change out a primary photo, and fire off quick answers to the many messages I receive. The *long* messages get bookmarked to be answered later.

And therein lies the point of this blog entry (well, the point that's between the point I already made and the point that goes with the title of the post).

I have learned that there is a really easy way to get me to answer emails, MySpace messages, blog comments, etc., ever.

And here's the way.

Be quick about it.

Have a quick question. I'll reply with a quick answer. If you ramp up for days to the point (even if that point boils down to a quick question after all), I'll bookmark that shit for answering later. Seriously, if you've sat with me when I've checked my BlackBerry for "messages since last check," you'd know that this is the ONLY chance you have of getting your email answered. It's not personal. It's just a matter of 1's and 0's and freakin' TIME.

[Unless you want your question to get an answer at "The Actors Voice," in which case you have to email me at the address that exists for no other purpose than to be an opt-in for that scenario or say yes when I fire back a quick, "Hey, can I use this?" in response to your long-ass message.]

So, if you want to hear from me and you're freaking out that you haven't yet, try being brief. Try shooting me a one-line comment to which I can reply with a one-line comment. That shit works nine times out of ten. And the emails that scroll for days? They get flagged to answer later.

How many emails are currently in my "flagged to answer later" folder? That'd be 3343 at ONE, primary email account as of this moment (and that includes messages that are getting pretty crucial, w/ regard to casting, speaking engagements, and friendships what will be OVER if I don't at least shoot back an "XO" soon). God forbid you want to know what's "starred" in my spam-catching gmail accounts.

Bless my bones for even being able to keep my head straight for a minute.

Okay, so what's the point of this entry?

Well, I signed off at 11:59pm and went back to sorting/marking the submissions on Another Harvest Moon. (I'm seriously trying to get to a point where my built-in analysis of value structure regarding which rep is the one who rates "highest" becomes a no-brainer, rather than having to review who said what and at what moment which photo was submitted and who included video and what pitch call was better and blah blah blah, but that's another story for another blog entry.) Then I got to a stopping point and received an email saying I had a new comment at my MySpace page, so I did the cool covert thing those of us who don't log in constantly seem to do... I visited my MySpace page "from afar."

Yeah, it said I was still online (but, as mentioned above, that happens... even after I've logged out... so I'm not worried about that), but the disturbing thing was that it said I had logged on most recently 5/23/07.

WTF?!?

I logged on 5/22/07 at 11:35pm as per usual... and I logged out at 11:59pm.

DAMMIT!

So, now I've fallen down the rabbit hole and I'm still on the MySpace way after midnight. That's the surest way to ensure I don't get work done! Bastids!

Ah, well, I'm definitely getting my money's worth. ;)

Posted by bonnie at 12:44 AM | Comments (1)

May 5, 2007

I blame FX.

So, I've been catching up on TiVo'ed TV and that means a lot of The Shield and The Riches (I tend to stay on top of things like America's Next Top Model and Heroes no matter how busy the week gets.

Well, after consuming several hours of both of these fine yet angst-filled FX shows, I've found I'm having *really* creepy dreams.

Lots of dead people. Lots of dying people. Lots of lying. Lots of covering up lies. Lots of suspicion and emotional turmoil.

This is NOT how a Bon gets her rest on.

Oooh, goodie! The Biggest Loser marathon on The Style Network. That oughtta cleanse the palate a bit! Phew!

Posted by bonnie at 2:11 PM | Comments (0)

March 28, 2007

Eff Off, Spam Faxers

So, every morning since Friday (usually starting around 6am), we've been receiving a half-dozen spam faxes (or rather, spam fax attempts, since I'm up and intercepting the calls to prevent waste of paper and ink) from...

Number Unknown (and yes, we have anonymous call block),
310.388.8002,
310.388.8021,
514.958.0000, and
514.958.0001.

Eff you, spam faxers. And eff you, state of California, for not offering the most intense level of nuisance call block available to consumers in other states.

PS--I am super busy, miss my regular blogging, and hate to roll out such a negative nellie blitz now that I'm taking a moment's break from Cricket Feet Showcase-based work to post at all. Meh. Spammers suck.

Posted by bonnie at 6:24 AM | Comments (4)

March 12, 2007

Today is 12 of 12

So, today is 12 of 12 and so far all of my photos have been of cats. And vodka. And expressions on my face that have to do with trying to get a column finished while wishing sleep would come.

*sigh*

At least I'll win the "most boring 12 of 12" contest this month.

Update: column finished (but I didn't do my usual promotional blast. Just NOT in the mood), Snickers bar eaten (chocolate does not put me to sleep, but it totally should), sun just now starting to show up. *yawn*

Blah.

Bored.

Ugh.

Whatevs.

Posted by bonnie at 6:52 AM | Comments (2)

March 8, 2007

Okay, so...

I was just a total a-hole to a guy in page five of this thread over at the Showfax message board.

And I feel both bummed that I stooped and proud that I didn't tell the dork to suck a fart out of my ass, which is what I really wanted to say.

Is that wrong?

Oh... and Keith wanted me to blog about elbow wrestling, which I will do... later. Got showcase stuffs to do.

Posted by bonnie at 1:28 AM | Comments (7)

February 14, 2007

Stuff I have to get done.

1. Showfax.com/The Actors Voice-related.
a. Choose which of the 120 headshots I received should be used in Monday's Bad Headshots, Good Headshots column.
b. Edit those headshots into the format that works for presentation in the column itself (half of this task is already done).
c. Write the column.

2. Showfax.com/The Actors Voice: POV-related.
a. Decide which of the half-dozen contributions from CDs in other markets (I know! I can't believe how many people came through at once!) gets to be tomorrow's piece.
b. Notify the others that their contributions will run in March, April, or May (and hope they aren't mad).
c. Edit the piece I choose and write the "framework" piece to go with it.
d. Update the Wiki to reflect above.

3. Broken Windows/San Diego local hire-related.
a. Decide how many of the actors who said they would work as San Diego local hires but who refuse to make it to San Diego for an audition actually even deserve a response (I'm thinking: none).
b. Decide whether we should schedule new people into the slots left open by those who somehow can't make it to San Diego or leave the schedule a little "open" so as not to over-exert the production team during auditions (I'm thinking the latter).
c. Field the seemingly non-stop calls from people pitching themselves or their clients for these roles (some of which have already been cast by now).

4. Broken Windows/Los Angeles callbacks-related.
a. Confirm all callback appointments that were given out yesterday (in progress).
b. Find receipts from December prereads' production meal we covered, plus parking, and the callback space rental, so that I can get reimbursed.
c. Get a casting intern confirmed to run sign-in, since Keith will be OOT.

5. Broken Windows/name actor offer-related.
a. Follow up on outstanding offers.
b. Decide on next round of offers, if these all lapse without being accepted.
c. Arrange for meetings between name actors already attached and our director (half of these have already happened).

6. SAG CAP casting director/agent event-related.
a. Review list of actors (30--mostly kids) registered for the event.
b. Choose sides for each pair of actors and prep some back-up sides in case there are changes to the group after selecting the sides.
c. Find an intern who wants to help out on Saturday.

7. Cricket Feet Casting Actors Showcase-related.
a. Save and upload demo reel footage on newly-submitted actors so that the rest of the team can review them.
b. Review the venue contract.
c. Book and pay for space for auditions (verify dates with production team).
d. Find the scenes I have listed/contact comedy writers to ask for exclusive material.
e. Contact HHH sponsors to see if they'd like to be showcase sponsors.
f. Contact potential crew/tech/usher/music pros to check rates/availability.

8. Potential casting job-related.
a. Read Porndogs and watch trailer.
b. Follow up with Another Harvest Moon producer and re-read script.
c. Provide bid to Scab director.
d. Check in on How I Lost My Mind and Killed Someone financing status/timeline.
e. Find out of we're too late to work with Paul and Chris, both of whom sent scripts in the past few months when I was too busy to even return their emails, much less read the material. (KEITH! IF YOU HAVE DONE THIS, LET ME KNOW.)

9. Consulting-related.
a. Answer emails from actors who want private consulting.
b. Follow-up with kids' acting camp in Montana.
c. Establish rate for video series services, should THR deal come through.
d. Prep for BBC interview.

10. Other-related.
a. Decide whether I'm going to file for unemployment on the survival job thingy (doubtful... just not my style).
b. Prep 2006 financial records for meeting with tax preparer (I only ever got those four hours done... then stopped).
c. Do initial research on organizational needs/office flow issues bartered out.

*sigh*

Any advice?

Posted by bonnie at 11:58 AM | Comments (6)

February 11, 2007

A Question I'm Asking Myself Right Now:

(and I asked myself this same question when I attempted to do "the headshot columns" last year too).

Why, why, why, why, WHY do I attempt this column?!? Why?!?

Seriously, it is so so so so so so so much work. I can only hope it is also totally worth it, to those who read it. But, after having done so much work all week long on this AND now having put in four straight hours with another 14 or so stretched out in front of me, I'm just totally spent.

And no closer to being finished with it.

*sigh*

Not looking for wisdom (though, feel free to share any), just venting. And giving myself something to read the NEXT time I think attempting this type of column is a good idea, down the line.

Posted by bonnie at 6:23 AM | Comments (1)

January 25, 2007

Words That Are Designed To Hurt

There's a lot of theorizing going on lately, what with Michael Richards calling black men "niggers" and Isaiah Washington calling a gay man "faggot," but I have to say that I don't think of these recent outbursts as acts of racism or homophobia.

Remember when you were a child and you would yell at your parents, "I hate you! I wish you were dead!" before slamming the door to your room in a clever adolescent temper tantrum? You didn't say these words because you hated your parents or wished they were dead. You said these words to inflict pain.

The only difference here is that these folks are adults, not clever adolescents in the clutches of a major temper tantrum. Does that mean the rules are different for them? Yes and no.

We all have moments in which we feel completely backed against a wall. We, at those most primal moments, can choose to be filled with grace OR to lash out in whatever way will get us OUT of those situations, based on animal instinct. And in these cases, I'd say we witnessed public displays of the NON-grace-filled choice.

Hell, isn't war a public display of the non-grace-filled choice?

So, I don't see any point to getting riled up about "hate speech" as if it's the WORDS that were used that are the problem. Words have no power beyond what power we give them. And when the words are used only to inflict pain on another (when the grace-filled choice doesn't get made), the focus needs to be on how we can all make better choices.

It's always fine to open dialogue about racism and homophobia and closed-mindedness of all kinds, but far more important (I believe) is a conversation about choosing grace, even when all you can think about doing is hurling the heaviest weight you can lift at someone--for whatever reason.

But, as for "what the words mean," I think it's simple. Just like rape isn't about sex (it's about violence), these words aren't about race or sexual orientation. They're about inflicting pain.

Posted by bonnie at 2:22 AM | Comments (5)

January 14, 2007

Hmm. Okay.

So, I have a meeting next week for which I need to have a vision of the Cricket Feet "corporate identity." I know. *shudder*

But the truth is, we're coming up on the fifth anniversary of Cricket Feet, Inc., and I haven't got a damn clue what we're about, in terms of branding.

We cast. We publish. We do really geeky computer junk. We support my addiction to writing for and speaking to actors.

But what are we about? What's our business plan? What's our identity?

Use the comments section to give me a word or two, if you have a thought. If you want to read my casting philosophy, FAQ, or way-too-damn-long bio, have at it. Every producer and actor says working with me is exactly like they thought it would be, after having read my casting philosophy. But casting is soooooooo only a sliver of what Cricket Feet, Inc., is about, right?

Posted by bonnie at 3:24 AM | Comments (4)

January 8, 2007

Dear Santa Ana Winds,

Go away. I do not like you. It is currently 88 degrees in my home and you are creating very unpleasant pressure sensations in my sinuses.

I trust that you will take this note in the spirit it is meant: GO AWAY. I mean it.

Love,
BloodynoseBon.

Posted by bonnie at 3:13 PM | Comments (4)

December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas

Looking forward to our annual orphans' Christmas celebration. I can't believe this is our sixth year doing it. I guess you *can* build a family in Los Angeles after all. ;)

From 2004. From 2003 (click to enlarge). From 2002 (click to enlarge). From 2001.

I guess I never uploaded my photos from 2005. Or did I take no photos at the 2005 event? I know I got glutened while there, so perhaps I took no photos. This year, I'll be fine for photography (since I got glutened at the movies yesterday afternoon and spent the evening in bed sick, sick, sick. Glad I got that out of the way (*sheesh*). I'd really like to not get glutened anymore. That'd be nice).

Anyway, Merry Christmas, everyone! Stay grateful! I'm off the the kitchen to make my famous dip (hey, it's one of a few things I CAN make, so that makes it famous).

Posted by bonnie at 6:18 AM | Comments (1)

December 20, 2006

Foreign Money

When I was six years old, my brother married my sister-in-law. I was the flower girl. My sister-in-law had been in my life since I was six months old and I had just assumed that she would join my brother in living at our house after they got married. I hadn't even considered that the two would go live elsewhere. I was cute and sweet like that.

When they returned from their honeymoon, they brought me foreign money. I had never seen it before. It had lovely colors, shapes, and textures. The bills were different sizes. There were holes in the coins. And there was such artistry in them! I treasured these pieces of foreign money. And a collector was born.

Quickly I learned that every other place in the world had money that was more beautiful than ours. And every time anyone I knew visited another place, their souvenir for me was whatever they had left over, when emptying their pockets (after exchanging the "big" money for American bills). I began to treasure this collection, because it was not only made up of money from places I would likely never visit, but of gifts brought to me by people I knew and loved. It wasn't like I went to a bank and exchanged money so that I could *have* a collection. I *had* a collection because people who loved me brought me back little bits here and there.

By the time I was an adult, this collection was pretty dang impressive. I actually bought one of those collectors' exchange rate books to find out what the money was worth. But putting coins into sleeves and labeling them, like collectors do, somehow took the fun out of it all. What I loved about my collection was taking it out and handling it, comparing the designs from different parts of the world. Nothing was "mint" except by accident, so what did I care if someone on eBay would pay top dollar for something that I happened to have? I never intended to collect something that was worth something... only something that was worth something to ME.

Cut to July 2006. I'm auditioning actors for Three Poems and a gorgeous young man comes in for the role in which we will cast, well, a most gorgeous young man. It was a fun day of casting, let's just say that (we had a lot of eye candy to enjoy). So, this young man comes in and says, between takes (we're going to exchange out his scene partner and do a little redirect, so there's some chitchat), "I was actually reading your book in Afghanistan last year." Huh?!? That's random. "You were? Um, how?" "I knew I wanted to be an actor and I was living in Norway, so I signed up for a term of service in Afghanistan that would then allow me to come to the US to pursue acting. I ordered your book from Amazon.com and had it with me while I served in Afghanistan. It was essential to my ability to put my plans together for coming here. And now here I am, auditioning for you!"

I was in a state of shock. I mean, sure, I GET that my book is "out there." I've had the thrill of walking past the largest bookstore in Manhattan and seeing my own book displayed in the window, facing millions of people who pass by every day. I've received the emails that say, "Your book changed my life," and "I'll thank you when I win my Oscar because I never would've thought I could do this career without you." But something about having this amazingly talented, naturally MEANT for acting kid in front of me, telling me that he had been in a few different continents in the past couple of years, all the while reading my book and planning for this moment... I don't know... it just felt like one of those WONDERFUL punches in the gut. The kind where you GET that there's a ripple in the water a world away, just because you toss in a pebble.

Sure, I remember the very first days of putting Self-Management for Actors together. I remember the binders upon binders of information on the foot of our bed in our apartment in the Hollywood Hills. Only the bedroom had air conditioning and I was on migraine watch. I had to stay cool and quiet... perfect environment for doing my book. But I was scared. What if SMFA *wasn't* really a book? What if it was just a bunch of ramblings from a kid actor who could never really cut it as an adult? What if it was all anecdotal and not at all practical to actors working today? What if--even worse--it was all wrong? I could actually MESS UP someone's career with this load of hooey.

Keith assured me it was GOOD information. My friends on the BackStage.com message boards assured me it was GOOD information. My mentor Judy Kerr assured me it was GOOD information. My friends at higher tiers in the industry assured me it was GOOD information. So, onward I went. Six weeks in my bedroom from start to finish... then the book was off to the printers. I couldn't believe it was done.

So, why am I thinking about all of this today? Well today I received a little package from Thor Knai, the talented (and, oh yeah, really gorgeous) actor who spoke with me about my book this summer. See, he's back in Norway right now and we had been sending comments back and forth on MySpace. I mentioned that I collect foreign money. He mentioned that he liked reading my books. We each sent packages across the world and here I am fondling my kroner bills and coins with glee. I hope he's enjoying Acting Qs as much!

Posted by bonnie at 10:45 PM | Comments (3)

December 9, 2006

Hi. I'm an idiot.

So, I pull out my Jury Duty summons to call the "on call" line today. It's very clear, on the paperwork, that you may call in at any time on the weekend before your first proposed service date (mine is Monday), as long as you are already registered.

Well, duh. Of course I'm registered. How else would I get a jury summons unless I had registered to vote? Duh.

So I call in, expecting to be told to either show up on Monday or call again Monday afternoon to check in about Tuesday, blah blah blah.

The system tells me, instead, that I'm not yet registered. I need to push another series of buttons in order to GET registered... so I do that, and of course the system tells me I am LATE in registering (you're supposed to register within five days of receiving the summons, apparently) and therefore I cannot serve as scheduled. I HAVE TO REQUEST A DEFERMENT.

"I don't WANT a deferment," I say to myself. But then I think, "Oh, wait. That actually would be good, as this week is already insane in the extreme, schedule-wise." So, I hit the buttons that allow me to postpone service 'til NEXT Monday, since that's when the industry will be GONE and even if I am the only one in town and therefore HAVE to serve, so what? I'll get a lot of writing done.

I hang up and say to Keith, "Wouldn't you think they would put somewhere ON this summons that you have to call twice? Once to register and once again to report? I mean, I'm an intelligent person. How could I miss that?"

I reread the first line of my summons: Do not appear without registering. No problem! I'm registered. Otherwise, how would I have received this notice?

A few lines down, I see: You are required to register using the telephone within five days of receipt of this summons. Oops. Missed that.

"Maybe they should've put that in bold," Keith says.

Yeah. It's pretty bold.

I'm an idiot.

Oh well... jury duty next week. Fair enough. I deserve to get put on a really long, boring trial after having been that stupid.

Posted by bonnie at 1:00 PM | Comments (3)

November 25, 2006

Broken Windows and Blue Men

So, if you've been keeping up with the numbers for Broken Windows submissions, you'll like this update.

As of Saturday the 25th at 7:30pm:
UNVIEWED.....VIEWED.....SELECTED.....SCHEDULED.....CALLBACK.....ROLE
12.....509.....279.....0.....0.....SARA
3.....70.....118.....0.....0.....TEDDY
4.....199.....105.....0.....0.....KATIE
15.....430.....263.....0.....0.....NATE
7.....202.....177.....0.....0.....BETH
10.....414.....201.....0.....0.....AMY
13.....428.....274.....0.....0.....WALT
3.....223.....107.....0.....0.....DJ
2.....1.....57.....0.....0.....BRIAN
11.....540.....244.....0.....0.....JOEY
7.....211.....150.....0.....0.....STEVE
1.....33.....54.....0.....0.....MARY
4.....93.....112.....0.....0.....DORI
0.....97.....89.....0.....0.....BENNIE
9.....895.....289.....0.....0.....WAITRESS
2.....14.....16.....0.....0.....WOMAN HIT BY CAR
0.....52.....39.....0.....0.....TEENAGED BOY

All of the numbers added together equal the total submissions. (I'll let y'all do the math.) Hee!

Anyway, that's submissions after one week and one day. Including days like Thanksgiving and "everyone is out of town" weekends. Pretty impressive. This is a big project. We have formal offers out to "name" actors on a couple of role. The pitches have been really dang cool. I'm excited.

I am LOVING the PBS special on Blue Man Group (Inside the Tube). I saw them in their original venue off-off Broadway in 1996 and I still can't imagine what their show must be like in such a large presentation (the theatre I went to had about 75 seats).

Anyway, migraine hell seems to be about over. I've done a lot of sleeping to try and recover from it. Still feel like I've been hit by a bus, but I guess I've felt much worse many times before. But coming that close to a "real" migraine for the first time in two years is scary stuff. Hate hate HATE that I had to miss Thanksgiving, but what'r'ya'gonna'do? When a migraine starts up, you hit the cold, dark, quiet room and stay put.

*sigh*

Back to work! Ooh! COPS is on! Yippee!

Posted by bonnie at 7:51 PM | Comments (2)

November 17, 2006

Happy birthday to my favorite ex-boyfriend!

Hope you have a delicious birthday celebration, rockstar weekend, and the best new year of Chip EVER!

Much love to ya, Chipper! XXOO

PS--New breakdown going out this morning for a feature film with 50 (!) roles. Yippee!

Posted by bonnie at 10:57 AM | Comments (2)

November 11, 2006

12 of 12 is Sunday

I'm actually really tired, so I'm going to bed (also, the Frankenputer that Keith has been building is making a really loud whirring sound, so I'm annoyed at being in the same room with it. I'm also hungry. Overly hungry. Like where you're so hungry that you aren't hungry anymore, so go with it? Yeah. Like that. Sleep is like that too. Sometimes I get so sleepy that I wrap back around to not sleepy--or incapable of sleeping, probably--and just stay right on not sleeping. So, here I am, still not eating, but going to bed earlier than usual. Yes, I am aware that it is like 3:30am. What?).

ANYWAY!

12 of 12 is Sunday and if you've never done 12 of 12 then you definitely should do it this month because:
a. it's a Sunday, which means you won't be taking boring photos while you're at work (except for me... Sunday is the day I write my column)
b. the bonus photo is THANKSGIVING or whatever you're grateful for or whatever (that's always a good practice)
c.
d. if you don't do 12 of 12 either this month or next (or both, I guess), then you can't say you've been doing it since its first year (and when it's as big as PostSecret or effin' YouTube and Chad makes $1.6 billion off it, you'll just be some sad Johnny Come Lately who started up in 2007 and everyone will say, "Oh, you are SO a year late," and you will cry).

Holly Cow, is this a post written in the style of Erik KiKi Patterson or what?!? Jeebus!

Anyway, charge your camera batteries, clear off your memory card, and get ready for a fun 12 of 12 on Sunday. Deal? Okay, now I'm to bed. XXOO

Posted by bonnie at 3:38 AM | Comments (3)

October 31, 2006

Things To STOP Saying

Okay, so I catch myself saying "DUDE" a lot. Not out loud as much as in my head. I know that's weird, but it's like I use the word "DUDE" as a substitute for "dang" and "c'mon" and "are you kidding me" and "boy, please" and "seriously" (among other things).

So, while I was thinking about the many ways in which I can use the word DUDE, I noticed a phrase that has LONG been a least favorite of mine (see item number six in the list of The Top 17.4 Ways To Piss Me Off) coming out of the mouth of a local morning show host ABOUT EVERY 20 SECONDS. Seriously.

Watch channel 5 (the KTLA Morning Show) and listen to the chick--Michaela Pereira--during her entertainment news segment (the only time the guys on the crew will let her talk for more than a minute at a time) and COUNT how many times she asks, "Do you know what I mean?" She uses it as an effin' punctuation mark to her EVERY sentence. Seriously, people, if someone doesn't know what you mean, you can bet that same someone will ask you to clarify. Stop it. Dude.

Well, I've also noticed that people have started saying "all of the sudden" instead of "all of a sudden" and I totally blame shows like Next and Parental Control and other MTV type programming for melting the brains right off kids and teaching them that however the hell they WANT to say it WORKS. (I mean, if the non-word alright can make its way into the dictionary, anything is possible. I actually heard a Real Worlder say, "Mark and I's relationship is complicated.") Yes, part of what I love about the (American) English language is how very OPEN to change it is. It's also part of what makes me effin' batshit crazy. *shudder*

So, then I listened to myself to see if there is anything other than the internal DUDE that I'm saying too much. Something that I'm saying AS A FORM OF PUNCTUATION instead of as the words themselves. And I found it. I absolutely have a phrase that must be just as annoying to others as "Do you know what I mean?" is to me.

"Here's the thing."

I start out about a third of my sentences with that. It's basically a, "Here. Listen now. This is the important part." And seriously, if you're listening to me, it's all important. You know that.

So, here it goes: I pledge to attempt to curtail my use of "here's the thing" as a means of underscoring my most important points.

Dude.

Posted by bonnie at 9:14 AM | Comments (11)

October 28, 2006

Boo!

I know I haven't blogged in awhile.

As I said in an email earlier today...

Eh, no. Way busy. (As usual.) A new column I pitched to my boss at Showfax rolls out on Wednesday (and I'm its managing editor), so I've been working like nuts with casting directors in New York and Canada all week. Also trying to nail a place down for Hollywood Happy Hour so that we can do a year-end event (which means a place has to be secured by Tuesday pretty much). And just got a new deadline for HILMMAKS casting stuff, so life is pretty busy 'round here. Quality problem, of course. ;) Lovin' it! Lovin' you! XXOO

Just the same, wanted to stop by and say HAPPY HALLOWEEKEND! Have fun, be safe, and remember to set your clocks back and all that good stuffs.

And goooooooo DAWGS... and KEEP VOTING FOR TIFFANY! Thanks!

Posted by bonnie at 9:26 AM | Comments (2)

October 22, 2006

Do you like the funny?

If so, then you should go buy shirts, mugs, and hats from one of my oldest-ago friends on the planet (er... we met in Quo Vadis Dixon's English class at North Springs High School in 1983).

Bonus: He's really talented and smart and funny and creative and even Mr. Wonderfulest.

To answer your questions about what I must've done wrong to shower my husband with public bloggy love, I did nothing wrong. He's just a good. And sometimes a good needs to be told he's a good. And in front of people. Nothing wrong with that.

Don't forget that you can keep voting for my niece Tiffany up 'til November 3rd. I'm convinced that she will always be in the smack-dab middle (as that's where she is every time I go vote, except for that one time when she was LAST and I spent the entire day voting until she was up to the middle... and yes that was the day that she led California to the tune of like 93%). Huge thanks to the other passionate sources of many votes. ;) Y'all rock.

What else? Um. I thought I had more updates, but I guess I don't. I've been spending the weekend updating the Casting Wiki like there is no tomorrow (sorry, Rockstar Intern Julie, that means more work for you... ready and waiting) and I think that'll be the topic of my next column, as working on the Casting Wiki has totally changed how I feel about keeping hardcopy headshots. And maybe I should say so.

Can you believe that I've only been casting for three years and eight months? FREAKY. Thank you to Parry Shen and Chad Darnell for recent really cool shoutouts. I really appreciate the love.

Oh, and hey, Santa Ana winds... could you GO AWAY please? Thanks.

Posted by bonnie at 2:03 AM | Comments (3)

October 11, 2006

MCJ at Dan Tana's

MCJ (my cousin Joni) is in town for a day. On Thursday, we're taking her to Dan Tana's for the first time. No, she's not Paris. No, we're not Nicole. She's not coming to LA to experience what she's seen on Entertainment Tonight. She missed the Thirty Silly celebration and hopes to meet the Dan Tana's regulars on her li'l trip to town. Come play! (It's 12 of 12 AND our Nonaversary too. So many reasons to celebrate!)

PS--I love my NBF Milissa. We had a blast tonight at the Running with Scissors premiere. I encourage everyone to find his or her dozen-years-younger version to hang out with from time to time. It's fun!

Posted by bonnie at 3:10 AM | Comments (2)

October 5, 2006

Hi

I haven't blogged in awhile, have I? Hmm. I also haven't read blogs in awhile. I'm so behind. Spending a lot of time on the Casting Wiki and also gearing up for this weekend's read-thru.

Busy, busy, busy. As soon as I'm sure I couldn't get busier... well... whooooosh! There's another boost. I actually now have a subfolder in my email inbox of "stuff to read" because if the email is too long to skim, I'm not even reading it lately. Ack! And I never have time to get to the flagged messages. Quality problem, of course. It's just a dang good thing the gym is open 24 hours or we'd never go.

Look at me with Deb and Eitan last week (this was after the panel discussion at Samuel French). Aren't we cute? Okay, break over. I'll try to blog again soon. But seriously, I'm not even sure when I'm going to get my column done with this busy casting week. (I know, I know... quality problem. Shut up. Blah blah blah.)

Oh! It's almost 12 of 12 time! Are you ready? I will spend our fourth nonaversary away from my loving husband... as he will be on set. Again... quality problem. ;) Yay!

Posted by bonnie at 12:38 PM | Comments (6)

September 22, 2006

Car vs. House

Oh man. This is rich. Y'know those news stories about cars flying into homes and barreling through? Well, welcome to our 'hood today.

Just before 7:15am, there's a huge jolt to our building. It can't be an earthquake, though it feels like it might be. No... something has hit US. WTF, right?

Keith, who was sleeping in the bedroom, launched into the livingroom and to the front window, where I'm seeing a Volvo far, far "forward" of the other cars parked out front (including the TicTac).

I say, "Oh my GAWD! She hit the building!" (And I know she hit the frame because it was too big a jolt to have just been the garage door.) And then I watched her get back into her car and begin to back out. I asked Keith, "Is it okay for her to just leave?" And he, looking carefully at who this bird is, said, "Sure. It's her building."

Yup. The lady we make our rent check out to each month just creamed Bob's garage (and if you know Bob, you know he keeps his LIFE in there, so this should be interesting). Her son (our landlord) is now down there, inspecting the damage. So far, in the game of Russian Senior Citizen in Volvo vs. 1963 eight-family brick two-story dwelling, the score is 1-zip.

Posted by bonnie at 7:44 AM | Comments (6)

When Andy Dick Arrives, It's Time To Go

Maybe everyone else in Hollywood knows this, but I'm pretty new to The Big Hollywood Private Party thing. So, you have to understand, when Keith and I arrived at the Stone Rose and my name was *actually* on the list, I was already thrilled and amazed. (No, it's not that I thought Jessica was "just being nice" -- heck, she'd invited me even before I'd interviewed her -- it's just the usual nervous doing something new for the first time thing.) But there are pretty much always random famous people at industry parties.

First up, Greg Grunberg. We'd been at the party for about an hour. We'd done the cool schmooze with most of the film's stars and crew members, plus a few of Jessica's best friends (all of whom were really thrilled with the article I had written) and a couple of actors she's hoping to have "break out" with my help (hey... if I can help, GREAT! I'll try). We'd had a couple of cocktails and a few nibbles of the yummy food they kept putting out, and found a great little spot to sit on the awesome patio. Soon, another couple leaned over, introduced themselves (I think we all joked about the shrimp or something), and when Greg came over to join them, he was introduced to us as well. Shake hands, all cool, blah blah blah. So, he's not really involved with this project but he knows the people. Same as me at this point, right? Right. No weirdness.



And then there's Kevin Sorbo. Kevin Sorbo? Really? Hmm. Well, that's kind of cool. I can't figure what his attachment to this group might be (nor is it any of my business to do so, really), but he's enjoying himself and people are enjoying him, so I figure maybe there's some other project in the works and that's just how this town works. Or, heck, maybe people are just friends with famous people and invite them like anyone else. It's just that it's a little odd somehow. And it shouldn't be (and it isn't, when I know the celeb... but it's weird when I don't).



So when Alfonso Ribeiro shows up, it's getting a little late. We've now had more than a few cocktails, Keith has told "the luckiest man in the world" story, my DVD cover has been autographed by a half-dozen members of the cast (and Jessica, of course), and I've been pegged as "and guest" in a handful of photos by random photographers. Fair enough. Alfonso is working the room. Keith approaches him to remind him that we know people in common (Alfonso directed an episode of a TV show our friend starred in, and we went to a taping, blah blah blah) and it's clear the man has women on his mind (and Keith's in his way). Very funny watching someone who shouldn't have to work at it having to REALLY work at it (it's like being at a college bar at last call and seeing the BMOC doing whatever it takes to go home with someone... even though he should be able to go home with anyone anytime anyway, right?).



Enter Andy Dick. Now something happens. Most of the crowd has gone by now. The servers are clearing off the tables to make room for these enormous cotton candy platters and other yummy dessert items. Everyone is hugging Jessica and her publicist goodnight and saying thank you and congrats. Most importantly: The tab has been closed. It's like Andy Dick walks in and The National Anthem plays on an old-timey TV station (sign-off 'til morning). But it gets louder, more frenetic, and bizarrely more "Hollywood" all of a sudden. I feel like I'm at a rave. Still, I head over to Andy to ask whether his recent emails to the director of a film I'm casting are actually coming from him (and I should be approaching him about doing the project) or not. "Yeah, I don't really DO the online thing. If she's hearing from 'me' through MySpace or something, it's my web guy, not me." (Note to self: Never have someone think they're hearing from "me" when it's really "my people" doing the correspondence. At least be true in that respect.)

So, maybe the rest of the world knows that when Andy Dick arrives, it's time to go. I learned it for myself on Monday. So, we left the Stick It DVD party and went to Dan Tana's, where I spent the rest of the night groping my friends, slamming too many free drinks, and talking about Oliver Freaking Stone.

(And, apparently, where I lowered my tolerance to the point that, come Wednesday morning, I was laid out with some sort of flu that I'm still fighting. Bleh. Oh well... well-earned, I s'pose.)

Posted by bonnie at 4:21 AM | Comments (5)

September 10, 2006

12 of 12 is Tuesday

Here's your 30-hour warning that 12 of 12 is coming.

Get your cameras ready. And on Tuesday, start snappin'. Woo!

Posted by bonnie at 8:46 PM | Comments (0)

August 19, 2006

I believe

that homes should come with as many dishwashers as there are residents. That way, we could all just get along in our chosen methods of loading up the damn things.

That is all.

Posted by bonnie at 7:02 AM | Comments (7)

August 6, 2006

I Love Gimlet Night.

In addition to teaching one another the meaning of cray cray and discussing hard-hitting issues like the marketing strategy behind Snakes on a Plane (and whether John Cusack needs to be traded in for Seth Green on our "must" lists, seeing as the over-40 thing is not as cool), we do things like...

...deconstruct the job of the publicist who reps someone like Mel Gibson or Star Jones, play live CLIFF and realize the EASIEST thing to do is decide who goes off the cliff (and that we actually will choose a live-in partner with whom we'd like to have sex--since maybe that could happen down the line--and, when one of the choices is someone who is dead, we'll choose that person as a roommate, since, y'know, he'll be gone in a minute and we'll have the place to ourselves), talk about serious effin' career moves that have made strong women out of us all, realize we're all a little bit Charlotte and a little bit Samantha, AND...

...most importantly, decide that being named an onomatopoeia is a really good idea (see: Thwok) because if all people were named by the sounds they made (use your imagination), we could always choose our exact right partners. *ahem*

Loves me some Gimlet Night.

G'nite!

Posted by bonnie at 5:46 AM | Comments (1)

August 2, 2006

Musings after 3am.

There are friends you love.
There are friends who love you.
And there are friends with whom you engage in mutual worship.
And that last one is the best kind of friendship there is.
For reals.

Posted by bonnie at 3:22 AM | Comments (2)

July 23, 2006

bleh

bored
too hot to think
therefore
no work is getting done
can't don't need to don't want to sleep
and tv is silly
silly
silly
brain too fried to even do sudoku
so
sprinkle catnip on the floor and
watch the animals play
resoak everything in ice-cold water
go online
and
bitch
bitch
bitch

bleh

Posted by bonnie at 3:45 AM | Comments (4)

July 22, 2006

Long, Rambling Post

I got flowers today. (Of course, I mean Friday, but y'know how my timelines work.)

The amazing Mister Trevor Murphy sent me flowers (and I'm not entirely sure why), and the funny thing about getting flowers from cute boys is that Keith, who is rarely jealous, gets his fur up a bit over this kind of thing. (Boys are so adorable like that.) Maybe it's just for show. Still funny.

Thank you, Trevs. You're precious.

Ready for some great news (and something encouraging for every friend who's ever shot a pilot that didn't get picked up)?

Nobody's Watching, the pilot Bob Clendenin did last year, has found a new life on YouTube (seriously... watch the whole three-part episode. It rocks) and now (according to tomorrow's article in The Hollywood Reporter) is going back into production.

No idea what this means for Bob and the show he's in that DID get picked up this season, but MAN what a great problem to have!

My tooth hurts.

My fingernails are longer than they've been in like... ever. Being healthy is fun.

There's a WAY pimped out orange Corvette that's been parked on our street for a few weeks. I finally saw the guy who owns it and said to Keith (who was in the other room), "Describe the guy who owns the orange Corvette." "I've never seen the guy who owns the orange Corvette." "I know. Describe him anyway." "Um... white, 55, pot-bellied, bald?" "Yup. Cute little ring of silver hair. No comb-over, though."

Don't you just love stuff that's a wee bit predictable?

Oh, and am I the only one who almost always confuses the words etymology and entomology? I guess it's because of the whole Spelling BEE thing. *snork*

Okay... back to work.

Posted by bonnie at 3:40 AM | Comments (3)

July 8, 2006

I am...

...too stupid to edit audio.

The amazing David Lawrence sent me the audio file of our radio show and told me I could feel free to edit out commercials and put clips up on my site with a link back to his.

And here I am with thousands of dollars of editing software and I can't for the life of me figure out how to edit audio.

My FCC license should be revoked, I tell ya.

All this to prove that I am, in fact, about to turn thirty-silly and that's code for I'M OLD.

*grumble grumble*

Posted by bonnie at 1:43 AM | Comments (8)

June 18, 2006

Keith and Mini-Keith

Of course, Quinn is less "mini" with every visit, but I swear this kid behaves EXACTLY like his father, even though he lives 2200 miles away 49 weeks of the year. That *has* to be a pain in the ass to the ex. I mean... Keith's "quirks" are a pain in the ass to ME and I love the guy! Imagine having parted ways and still having a daily reminder of the power of genetics! Phew. Bless Quinn's daily parentals. They're doing a kick-ass job. This is a very good kid.

Click to enlarge.

Keith was at Nelson's overnight (babysitting Lois while Nelson hung out with Meryl Streep in Manhattan) and Quinn asked to stay here with me. No problemo, except the kid was up at five ayem... and I went to bed at four. *yawn* Methinks I shall sleep a bit tonight! Tomorrow is a big day.

Anyway, I spoke with each of the dad-types, and Quinn said hello to each too. Nice thing about a kid in a non-traditional family unit... he doesn't question the fact that we call two dads for me on Father's Day. When Keith returned from Nelson's, the boys played soccer for hours in the park while I finished my column and finalized casting decisions on the two shorts I'm casting. We then walked "forEVER," (says Quinn) to get to Color Me Mine to paint a dragon for Quinn and a cooking spoon holder for Dad.

We always celebrate Quinn's half-birthday during his visits, so we made that event today. It was a big celebration with way too much walking for Quinn's liking, although he did enjoy seeing the Chicken Car parked up on Lincoln. You know the one. It's like an Angelyne or a Dennis Woodruff sighting, but for the 310 exclusively. Gotta love LA.

Thankee, everyone, for the love re: Pissy Little Mood. She's gone. Gotta love the water sign gals! As soon as I get a real understanding of how a negative statement can resonate through us like a pinball locked between bumpers while a positive statement can be forgotten the instant it's said, I'll share the meaning of life with everyone. I promise.

And now that the boys have gone to bed and I have another few hours of work to finish, the eternal question: Do I open that bottle of wine?

Posted by bonnie at 11:34 PM | Comments (4)

Pissy Little Mood

I've had an ego-bruising day (seems I have those every now and then, especially after a few weeks of "highs"), so I tried to distract myself by creating my FAQ page.

Whatevs. Still pissy. Bleh.

Posted by bonnie at 1:11 AM | Comments (6)

June 17, 2006

Debrief

Okay, so it's time to officially say that I did not complete the task of finishing my screenplay during the 14-Day Screenplay Challenge.

Here are my thoughts on that: What I learned during these 14 days is that I like to do things I'm very good at doing. No... I like to do things I'm sincerely excellent at doing. This is why I don't cook. I'd far prefer to pay someone who is much better at cooking to do so for me. And, while I love love love writing and I adore reading a good screenplay and I am passionate about casting a great screenplay, I think I will always prefer to enjoy the talents of existing brilliant screenwriters.

During the 14-Day Screenplay Challenge, I cast a short film, made offers to actors on two other films, moderated a panel at the HBFF, wrote two columns (plus "Your Turn" pieces), had about a half-dozen power meetings and/or industry relationship-building dinners, and welcomed Quinn for his annual visit. AND I created an outline for a screenplay and put just over 18 really decent pages into Final Draft.

It is what it is. And I am not a screenwriter. Not now at least.

Congratulations to my friends and colleagues who completed their screenplays (or who will in the coming days)! I am inspired by your creative output and will look forward to reading your work (and maybe even casting it) someday soon.

Just got back from seeing Cars with the kiddo (and his son). *giggle* It's cute. Too long, but cute. I have a rant coming about parents with unruly or crying children... but it'll have to wait. Seriously, I want to rage, but I worry I'll get the whole, "You don't know how it IS," thing, from parents. Let me just say that I think a pretty basic rule of courtesy should be: If your child is wailing, screaming, or otherwise howling, YOU NEED TO TAKE SAID CHILD OUT OF THE SCREENING AREA. Why do parents think that standing in the BACK of the space (y'know, so said parents miss none of the on-screen action) is "good enough"? Consider acoustics. Please.

Oh, if you go see Cars, be sure to stay for the closing credits. Very clever stuff. Typical Pixar fun.

Babes and I had a rockstar time on our gal-pal date last night. Most of the bloggers were outstandingly good at doing spoken word stuffs, dinner with "Buk" and his awesome producer was fantastic, and Bukowsical! is possibly one of the best plays I've seen in Los Angeles in years. Seriously. It was phenomenal. Babes and I laughed about a zillion laughs, resolved at least a dozen tangents, and said, "KiKi would love this," about five times.

All in all, an exceptionally fine first wedding anniversary!

Oh, and what's up with the 30 or so recent Google searches for "teach my ass" leading to the BonBlogs? Huh?!?

Posted by bonnie at 6:11 PM | Comments (6)

June 16, 2006

Ow-oooooooot Tonight!

Singing like Mimi:
I've had a knack from way back / Breaking the rules once I learned the games / Get up / life's too quick / I know someplace sick / Where this chick'll dance in the flames / We don't need any money / I always get in for free / You can get in too if you get in with me / Let's go out tonight / I have to go out tonight / You wanna play? Let's run away / We won't be back / Before it's New Year's Day / Take me out tonight! Meow! / So let's find a bar / So dark we forget who we are / Where all the scars from the / Nevers and maybes die
Hee! *happy dance* Very soon, I'll hit the town with the lovely Miss Babes McPhee for some theatre and booze and more theatre.

We'll start off at Subject Line Here (and our ticket price goes to a good cause, so that's a great first event of the night--get all warm and fuzzy feeling, plus see the lovely CoCo doin' her thang).

Then, after drinks and snacks nearby, we'll head to Sacred Fools' critically-acclaimed late night show, Bukowsical! (starring several Friends of Bon; including two actors I've cast before--Kathi Copeland and David Lawrence). Very excited!

Do say hello, if you happen to spot us two silly girls catting about the 'wood on my first anniversary. *hee*

Re: Earthlink's shenanigans, I guess they either finished early or scrapped the plan only to screw us another day. After 10 hours offline, we're back. I hope for good. Man, wireless DSL can spoil a girl.

For those who were eagerly awaiting a review of the 12,000 BTU portable A/C, the review is in: IT'S A RAVE. Holy jeebus, my living room is an icebox! Yippee!

*basking while making casting phone calls*

Life remains the good.

Posted by bonnie at 11:34 AM | Comments (9)

June 12, 2006

Happy 12 of 12!

This month's 12 of 12 was much more exciting than last month's 12 of 12 for me. (Visit Chad for all of this month's participants. He was shooting for 75.) PARDON THE NAME-DROPPING LINKAGE AND RANDOM STORY-TELLING. I figured it was a good time to get everyone up to speed a bit.

Oh, and click any of these photos to see the larger version.

Started the day with the assigned "bonus photo" (one taken at 7am PDT). Keith heard my alarm going off, grabbed a cat, and came in to show me his phone reading "7am," which I made my first photo. (Back to sleep, since I went to bed at 5am. Keith, however, was on his way to the Funk Bros. with his ailing auto.) A couple of hours later, I was up and scheduling callbacks for Salvation, Texas. Happily, I also got to CAST two actors today. Yippee! Congrats to Mark and Alison! Y'all rock! (I'll start building the cast webpage soon.) Also, I got a call from Dee (with whom the HILMMAKS producers met last week--while I was meeting with Chris--both of whom it seems will be offered roles in that film; plus Chris looks like he's in for The Masquerade) asking me to sub her acting class one day later this month. Of course, I said yes! I love her students. They're awesome! Then, Keith and I headed off in the TicTac for Los Feliz. By way of Koreatown. Cool sign, eh? Keith did the photographic goodness, here. I was the art director. Hee! Love the Wiltern. It's such a cool color. After our lunch, I snapped this photo of the TicTac with the House of Pies sign. First time I'd been to the House of Pies since October, 2001 (after a brilliant play at the Company of Angels). Our date, my buddy Richard, to whom I was able to offer a role in How I Lost My Mind and Killed Someone last week. He accepted. I'm so freakin' excited about how this film is taking shape! Since he bought lunch today, Keith and I will take him to Tana's as a thank you after Quinn leaves town. I never thought I would spend $30 filling up my gas tank. It only holds 11 gallons, for cryin' out loud! But, I do have to say that the ARCO on Franklin at Gower has always been the cheapest gas I've ever seen... even when I lived at the Hollywood Tower in '93 and Melissa and Chick found a kitten (which they named Arco) there. I wasn't going to use this photo (I have many others from the day's events), but I really like the distorted image. The accordian bus is one of my favorite funny-looking things in LA traffic. And how gorgeous are the jacaranda this time of year! Wow! Apparently they've slipped a condom over the 360 Building. Somehow I missed the news that it was on fire a year ago. I blame TiVo. Tip from the former Improv Comedy Traffic School instructor: if the meter is blinking "FAIL," you don't have to put money into it. You do, however, have to put a note on it, if you plan to do more than run in and out of the Hollywood Post Office like I did (after dropping Keith off to get his car from the shop). Cricket Feet World Headquarters. Did you know our official offices were so small? We have pixies working for us in there. They are very happy. It was such a lovely day that instead of coming right home, I drove the extra seven blocks and did a lap by the spot where Keith and I got married 361 days ago. Wouldn't you get married there too? It's just so gorgeous here! Back home, back to work. Answering machine is all but full of messages from agents confirming actors' callbacks for Wednesday, casting directors with questions about our panel at the Hollywood Black Film Festival on Thursday, and news that Dennehy officially has our script now. Had to make some changes to our vacation schedule due to OUR building being tented (sheesh!), but it looks like that all worked out just great too. Hee!

Y'know... I think I might just have the most kick-ass life available for a dollar. So glad I bought it. Totally worth it. Hope your 12 of 12 was as much fun. Yippee!

Posted by bonnie at 8:54 PM | Comments (14)

May 21, 2006

Sometimes I wish

I were motivated entirely by money and nothing else.

It would make the decision-making process (in the whole Option Overload arena)

much

much

easier.

Just sayin'.

Posted by bonnie at 3:19 PM | Comments (8)

May 16, 2006

Being a Kid = Therapy

As I was gearing up to watch a TiVo'd 90210, I saw a commercial for a line of Crayola Outdoor products.

Quite sophisticated looking stuff, I'd say.

I remember being quite happy with a big hunk of sidewalk chalk and a patch of asphalt on which I could doodle, draw, create a hopscotch grid, or make MY star on the local Walk of Fame.

But I also remember being in my mid-20s and getting my hands on some sidewalk chalk, heading down to the parking area behind my apartment, and spending hours just being a kid, avoiding some thesis outline deadline or the heartbreak that the bouncer to whom I'd given my number hadn't called.

I also recall being 18 and coming out of the Drama Department after Honors Drama 101 (I never read so many Greek plays before or since) with my classmate Melissa. It was October and an enormous pile of leaves had been raked up while we'd been inside. Without saying a word, we both stopped in our tracks, looked at each other mischievously, dropped our backpacks right there, clasped hands, and took a running-flying leap into the leaves. We didn't even notice the bus stop area packed full of other students--some looking at us with disapproval, some aching to join in our fun--until after we'd frolicked for a good three minutes.

One of my favorite things to do when Quinn comes to town each year is PLAY. I just wish I didn't have to wait to do it. WAIT... I don't. While I don't have any sidewalk chalk handy and there certainly are no piles of leaves in this part of town, I've decided I'm going to find a way to play today. Where did I put those Shrinky Dinks?

Posted by bonnie at 3:46 PM | Comments (9)

May 15, 2006

My Yellow Home

So, yesterday as Keith and I were headed out for a walk-and-shop, our neighbors asked, "So, didja hear we're being tented and bombed Tuesday?"

Now, I've never done more than drive past a tented building, but I do understand that it means there are unwanted critters and they need to be poisoned. I giggled with glee over getting to be so close to such a thing (as Steve hauled firewood out of his $1.3M condo, rolling his eyes over the nuisance).

Clickee for biggee.

But then I gasped, "Oh no! What if all of the things they bomb come running over here and set up camp in *our* building?!?" To which Keith oh-so-patiently replied, "Honey, that's WHY they tent the place FIRST." "Oh. Okay," I said.

So, I woke up this morning and the whole living room, dining room, kitchen, entry area was YELLOW. Hell, even Thwok was yellow!! (Or have my eyes just started seeing all things yellow and she's normal? You tell me!) And now I'm wondering if I'll start to see "normal" tomorrow... or if the poison will kick in just in time for yellow to feel like the new clear. Wheeeeeee!

Posted by bonnie at 7:55 PM | Comments (2)

April 28, 2006

Best Movie EVER

Okay, actually this was more than the best movie ever. It was like the best late morning/early afternoon date ever. But first the important part: THE BEST MOVIE EVER! (That'd be Stick It! Duh.) NOTE: SPOILER-FILLED POST (you've been warned).

Now, you know I've been looking forward to this movie for a while now. Def Jam Becca MC, KiKi Longpost, and Babes McPhee and I have all been talking about the greatness that we knew this movie would be. And being the best movie ever, it did not disappoint. Like a Christian kid on December 24th, I went to bed early (read: 6am) so that I could get up at the earliest possible moment after Santa had delivered my goodies (read: 10am, to get goin' for the 11:10am showing at the Promenade) and begin tearing through the wrapping paper.

Keith said, "Wake up! Time for your movie." I replied, "This is not just a movie. This is the beginning of my professional teenage gymnastics career." But wait... first there were previews (and really cool commercials).

Did you know that TLC is running a brilliant series of ads that depict life lessons such as the importance of NOT becoming the Crazy Cat Lady, why you should read instructions before using power tools, and how merlot and email don't mix? (Note: I've just realized that movie theatres are like the only place to see commercials anymore, what with TiVo and all. Hmm.) You can even order these figurines (like the one above) or customize them online like I did, below (seriously. That little one below. Click it. Read it. It's so me). Coolest part, in the Crazy Cat Lady PSA they screened before the movie, is that she leaves to go on a date and says, "Okay, you're in charge," to one of the cats. I so totally do that to whichever cat I see last, as we leave the house. Heh.

Okay, so there was also a really great commercial for Coca-Cola (woo) that must've cost a bazillion dollars. This kid is riding his bike through the city streets during an incredibly intense and beautiful parade of many eras and worlds. It's a gorgeous fantasy world that exists as long as he's drinking his Coke. Rockstar. Up my stock, kids. Thanks.

Oh, and before we go into the review of THE BEST MOVIE EVER (Are you totally feeling like you're sitting through trailers for this review? I am.), let me just say that in addition to the must-see Wordplay about which I blogged yesterday, now there's The Heart of the Game. Yup. It's now the documentary time of year for my moviegoing pleasure. I'm in. Totally.

Now, for greatness.

You've been to the movie's site, so you know the story. Hell, you've seen Bring It On, so you know the story. Well, sort of. Seems the film's writer/director (Jessica Bendinger--love that name, like she's a bending-er, like all of these flippy kids she writes about) is also making a political statement about the arcane rules of judging in the sport of elite gymnastics. She does it quite effectively, too.

But not as effectively as she writes coolass lingo. Holy hell, that's some great stuffs. My favorites:

*Dude! Why you always gotta bite my moment? It tastes good?--Poot, when Frank marshes his mellow or kills his buzz
*Well if it isn't Pariah Carey.--Joanne, upon seeing Haley's unwelcome return to the gym (BTW, I totally think we need to just refer to Mimi as Pariah from here on out.)
*Come here, rebel without applause.--Coach Vick to Haley, on one of many of her walk-off-in-disgust attempts
*I'm so sure I'm practically deodorant.--Haley about how positive she is she'll nail a particular trick
*(Q): What's a corsage? (A): It's the universal symbol for "whipped."--exchange between Poot and Frank, when facing a prom purchase (No, we don't get to go to prom in this movie, but we do brilliantly, gorgeously, gloriously shop for it.)
*(Insult): Diva! (Comeback): Dee-vil!--our heroes upon entering the gym before Nationals

Oh, but it's not just the quips I love!

No ma'am! It's also the New Miss Malaprop on the block! Rock it. This girl has the most lazily written character (she's so NOT the juicy wonderful villain we got to know and love in Bring It On or any other decent movie of its ilk), but it's totally worth falling in love with her just for the malaprops. Wow! Greatness. Just a sampling:

*If you do that, I will have a cardio-vasectomy!
*Can we get rid of the long-sleeved leos? We have a constitutional right to bare arms.
*I earned my spots. I'm practically a Dalmatian!
*I don't appreciate your instimulation.
*You got a GED? What does drunk driving have to do with school?

I mean, COME! ON! That shit is OUTSTANDING!

I predict lots of happy fun drugged-up movie-goers really enjoying the phenomenal prescription drug dream sequence and super-imposed bodies flipping and tricking simultaneously. The fun soundtrack includes a song entitled "I Slept With Someone in Fall Out Boy and All I Got Was This Stupid Song Written About Me." The sense of humor throughout this whole film is just rockstar. It never takes itself seriously, even when it has its "O Captain, My Captain" moment featuring my favorite flipper: Tarah Paige.

I cast Tarah as Cupid in Still of the Night last year. She's amazing. Her brastrap moment is only one of a few really unforgettable, scene-stealing offerings. That so rocks. Well done, cutie! You GO!

Other favorite items include Polly Holiday (I feel shame that I was certain she had died not too long ago) delivering a great line: "There are a lot of great people who had jerks for parents. We've gotta stick together;" and the Buttahara, probably my new favorite trick.

In the "we're going to nail the point of this movie home" line, Coach says, "Floor it." Keith leans over to me and says, "I thought the movie was called 'Stick it,'" to which I reply, "This movie is all about the subtlety." Keith then snorked. Luckily, there were only a dozen of us in the theatre, so I don't think many people heard.

As we left the theatre, glowing with delight (okay, maybe that was just me), we crossed paths with the "noted" Nolé Marin from ANTM, sans puppydog-on-princess-pillow.

And then we were given free samples of the new Dr Pepper Berries & Cream flavor. My review of that? The creamy stuff is really amazing... and the berry stuff is probably just kind of normal for the nectar-of-the-gods that is Dr Pepper... but there's some little aftertaste. Or perhaps it's just that I don't drink soda, so it's always a big trip for my tastebuds. Not sure.

Finally, after a quick stop into the bookstore for two books that should prep me very well for my big meeting next week (bought on a gift card I'm FINALLY redeeming, even though it was given to me almost a year ago as a thank you for a casting gig), we crossed Wilshire in front of the great Robert LaSardo, whom I wanted to cast in the above-mentioned Tarah Paige movie last year (but he was too busy with a soap opera gig). Anyway, big fan (me). And a great guy (he).

I'm still basking in the afterglow that was my morning with Stick It. I am certain that I will remain inspired to be the best professional teenage gymnast I can possibly be. Training began today. My rips have rips!

Posted by bonnie at 7:47 PM | Comments (7)

How Whole Foods lost us to Wild Oats:

Dear Whole Foods (specifically Whole Foods at 2201 Wilshire),

I'm a special-needs eater (read: I cannot eat wheat or wheat gluten). And that means that grocery shopping can be a high-maintenance activity, any time I'm branching out beyond fruits, veggies, meats, and dairy. Beyond the very serious allergy issues, there are also picky-eater-type issues of taste. There are things I enjoy more than others, flavor-wise, and when I find something really wonderful that doesn't send me into migraine hell WHILE TASTING YUMMY, I'm going to be your best customer for it. Count on that.

But on Wednesday, April 26th, you lost me. I didn't know you had been replaced until Thursday, April 27th, but I did know for sure on Wednesday that I would not be back to Whole Foods for my gluten-free shopping needs.

See, on that day, my wonderful husband (who is also the head chef around here) went to your store with a fairly typical list of gluten-free goodies with which he was to return home. But when he asked your bakery department clerk, Diego, to help him obtain some Kinnikinnick pizza crust, he was dismissed.

Let me get specific.

You don't actually carry Kinnikinnick pizza crust. You never have, in the four months since I discovered that it exists (and that it is wonderful). But after having called, having been assured it DID exist, and then having driven to three of your other locations--none of them nearby--only to find that it did NOT exist, back in January of 2006, my husband finally decided to ask someone at your store--the one closest to our home--to place an order for the product. And some wonderful employee, back in January, actually did order a case for us, which we bought at a 100% markup from the list price as advertised by the company, because at least you went to the trouble to get it for us.

Past tense.

When my husband asked Diego to please place an order for us again on April 26th, he was scoffed at. "We don't do that," Diego said. My husband replied, "Oh? Well, you've done it for us before. Is there someone I could speak with about placing an order again?" The response was, "We stopped doing that. How long ago did you do it? We don't do it anymore." And then Diego walked away. He was finished engaging in customer service.

My husband called me from the store to ask what the name of the other product was that I'd been looking for. That'd be the Sahale snack blends (for which I've been jonesin' since a week ago, when one of the blends was in a gift basket I'd received). I told him the name of the product and he informed me those weren't at your store either.

Now, this is particularly odd since, on the website for the product, your exact location is listed as one of THREE stores in our area that regularly stocks Sahale Snacks. After my husband's encounter with Diego, however, he chose not to inquire further about any "special requests" (even though this wouldn't be considered "special," since it's allegedly a product you regularly carry).

I knew I wanted to be sure to share my displeasure with you over the way in which my husband was treated in his attempt to purchase something from your store--something we had been able to purchase from you previously (and pay quite a lot for, seeing as it was a CASE of the product, priced at single-serving markup levels)--but it wasn't until April 27th that I learned what my real "problem" was with this whole thing.

See, on the 27th, my husband and I went to Wild Oats (specifically Wild Oats at 1425 Montana) to see if they had some of the items we were unable to find at your store the day before. Now, we didn't find either Kinnikinnick or Sahale Snacks at Wild Oats (and neither product is listed as available at Wild Oats locations, on their respective websites), but what we did find was EXCELLENT customer service in the form of our cashier, Courtney.

As we began our interaction, I asked Courtney whether Wild Oats might be able to order a product for us. She asked what it was and I told her about the Kinnikinnick frozen pizza crusts. She paused and then said, "Oh, yeah! I've heard of that! It's good, right?" When the light bounced off her nose-ring, I smiled, as she was so perky and eager to discuss a PRODUCT (How novel! Right?) with a CUSTOMER. She then proceeded to find out what shift the manager was working the following day (after explaining that the current manager on duty was visiting from another store and probably wouldn't be able to assure the order would go through without a hitch) and suggested that we phone in the morning in order to place any special order we might have.

Now, before you start thinking that she's a "Susie Policy" kind of gal (the teenager who is the Future Business Leader of America type and not just some kid working an after school job), I can tell you that I certainly didn't get that vibe from her. She simply seemed like someone who enjoyed her job enough to interact with those she came into contact with over the course of her shift--and even if she couldn't help us, didn't mind getting information to us on locating someone who might be able to do so.

Perhaps this is as simple as someone in your store (Diego) not caring enough about his job or the customers who shop there to step up and make a difference. Perhaps your corporation is "health food oriented" but not "co-op vibe" in nature and that filters down to your employees. I don't know. And it doesn't really matter to me. What matters is, I'd rather do business with a company that--through its EMPLOYEES--respects its customers, whether they have a debilitating food allergy for which they need special items or not.

Oh, and speaking of which, I noticed little tags ALL OVER the shelves at the Wild Oats store, highlighting "GLUTEN-FREE" products in an easy-to-spot manner. My husband mentioned that the other nearby Wild Oats location doesn't have such tags. Another point in the favor of this particular store. (Don't worry, their letter to the customer service department is on its way--and it's a little lovey-dovey, as we special-needs customers like to be treated with such concern and empathy. So, I'll be letting them know that's WAY appreciated.)

Finally, as we were leaving Wild Oats, I mentioned to Courtney that I had picked up a sample of the cucumber body butter, in case she wondered what was in my hand as I was heading out. She said, "Oh! Those are great! Go back and get the shampoo and body wash too!" So, now I have one each of the lotion, shampoo, conditioner, and body wash samples from Giovanni. Wow! Good customer service is so easy. And it means so much. (And, as we all know... people love free stuff!)

We bought far more than we should have, considering the fact that we were walking home (having only planned to pop in and buy a couple of things), but it was totally worth it and I can't wait to go back to the Wild Oats on Montana again. Oh, and tomorrow we shall call manager Alex and place a very large, very expensive special order. And if it's not expensive? We'll order double. As a thank you. (And as a little bit of an F-U to Whole Foods.)

Thanks,
-Bon.

Posted by bonnie at 12:40 AM | Comments (7)

April 27, 2006

Ramblings

Best Quote Ever

Just saw this at WWdN and I love it. I had to share it. I can't wait to use it about me.

I hung up the phone and ran around the house like a hummingbird being chased by a dog that shoots bees from its mouth.

Awesome.

Not Quite Geeky, But Trying

I set up a BlogRoll thingy and I have no idea whether I did it right. I did it because I'm OVER Rojo not telling me when feeds are failing and I also want a backup of my feeds for when Rojo isn't accessible. But I'm so seriously NOT tech-savvy about feeds that I'm predicting failure.

Avoiding the Crazies

Day one of operating as a shut-in (which I declared I would become over on Somesuch after dealing with all of the batshit crazy people coming out of the woodwork so far this week) was a huge success, in that I was visited by the greatness that is FWA. I so love my cousin!

Owie

I've been having issues with my neck for over a month now. Well, that's not true. A month ago, I had major neck pain (all muscle, all on one side). And now I have it again. So, some women have a menstrual cycle. I have a muscular cycle. And I've been taking Midol to try and ease the muscle pain because I figure, well, the drugs know where I'm cramping, right? Ugh.

When I DO Sleep

I keep having these recurring dreams that take place at school and involve things like forgetting my locker combination, showing up for final exams in classes I've skipped all semester long, not being able to find the classroom because they've renovated the school decades after I've been in it, etc. Does that ever stop? Will we still have school-anxiety dreams at 60? Just wonderin'.

So you LIKE the crazies?

Thank you, everyone, for the comments on the Decisions, Decisions post. (Hell, on all posts, really... because, like CoCo says, everybody loves comments!) I will do my best to craft an exotic, grippingly exciting tale that weaves the best of the most brilliant wonderful actors I encountered and the worst of the most bizarre freakshow actors who tried to "encounter" me this week and make sure that everyone is unidentifiable so that I don't get in (more) trouble. Hmm. Maybe if I make them all real estate brokers or midwives or grocery baggers or something....

But then, really... you have to know they're actors to just hit the BASELINE of what makes them so very... VERY.

Loves Me Some Office Supplies

Okay, so does everyone get as excited as I do about a new, real-wood, freshly sharpened, super-pointy number two pencil? No? Just me? Damn.

Countdown to GREATNESS

I am sooo freakin' excited!!! T-minus 31 hours 'til Stick It!

Posted by bonnie at 4:10 AM | Comments (13)

April 23, 2006

Happy Birthday, Pamela!

Since I only a few hours ago learned it is the dear sweet Pamela Jansen's birthday today, I HAD to make sure and post about it.

Pamela, you are an inspiring, amazing woman. Thank you for being my friend!

PS--You share your birthday with the lovely Kathryn Johnston (featured in SMFA) and the WildOgre himself, Bill Tarling. How cool that such great actors and FANTASTIC people were all born today?!? Love that!

Posted by bonnie at 4:29 PM | Comments (5)

April 22, 2006

Yum...

I know Babes McPhee is going to kick my ass for blogging about something in that damned gift basket, but I had to mention the yummiest thing in it.

That's the Soledad Blend. But from the looks of the website, Sahale Snacks sells a bunch of stuff I'd love to eat. Oh... and what's that? RIGHT DOWN THE STREET at the Whole Foods on Wilshire? Yeah, baby! Yum!

I've been really really really busy (I swear) uploading demo reels to the Cricket Feet server for producers to see (re: casting HILMMAKS) so it's not JUST my weird mood that's kept me from blogging today.

Maybe there will be an entry of interest later. I'll try. I promise. ;) At LEAST a quiz. That's easy enough.

Oh, and thanks JoJo for the head's up that Keith's CSI: Miami airs May 8th, not the 1st.

Happy Earth Day! Go hug the yard.

Posted by bonnie at 6:18 PM | Comments (3)

April 19, 2006

Abundance!

Oh, how I love this universe! Abundance is a beautiful thing!

Received yesterday a cute little teacup filled with precious flowers from a dear, sweet person: Deb Cresswell. PS--She's amazingly talented and brilliantly business-savvy. I adore her, and somehow she thought I deserved flowers. Yay! THANK YOU, Deb!

And last night, we won the lottery! No, not the $265,000,000 big prize... but that's okay. We had our best ticket so far this year: $7. Woo hoo! Yay!

Life, she is good! Argentum Fireside Chat tonight. Hope to see you local actor types there. Fun!

Hey, Jodi... we didn't show up on Wire Image, but the event did. ;) Still awesome fun. Thanks!! (And especially for the producer hook up. Woo!)

Oh... and Keith has now named TWO of our baby shrimps: Leon (the big one) and Shallow Hal (the tiny one that recently lost its red "shell" and is now clear). Hee!

Posted by bonnie at 1:42 PM | Comments (3)

April 14, 2006

So in love with you am I.

I've only been using it for two days but I way love ToRead. Way.

Lifehacker told me about it by way of my Rojo (which Beffers turned me on to).

ToRead sends you the text of a website you want to read later... sends it to your email. So that you can have it with you offline or in your handheld or wherever the heck you want it whenever the heck you want it and you don't have to do that stupid trick that never works very well (for me) which is commonly known as bookmark-a-bunch-of-tabs and (maybe) come back to read them later... oh, but wait, now the page is archived or for paid members only or some other such nonsense. This solves all of that. So effin' cool.

Headed to the season four wrap party for CSI: Miami with my husband the co-star later today. Woo! Excited to support him and meet some of his people. ;) And it's nearby. Again, woo!

I've been spending most of my time finishing my updates to contributions to Judy Kerr's awesome book, Acting Is Everything, fielding pitch calls on HILMMAKS (now that pilot season is over, everyone is getting way antsy on how casting might be progressing--which is slowly, but they don't want to believe that. Agents are all afraid we're missing their people during sessions we're not yet having), working up a column that is perhaps the most business-minded of any I've ever written (way ambitious too), and gearing up for a meeting lunch with a major player (and I'm about to start calling producer friends to figure out what the heck to expect from this encounter--while Keith begs me to just go in "open," which I will, but dangit I just want to get some idea. SOME).

Signing off with HAPPY BIRTHDAY wishes to the lovely Faith Salie, the amazing Bob Clendenin, and the spunky Belinda Berdes. What a great day for talented people to be born!

Posted by bonnie at 4:42 PM | Comments (2)

April 6, 2006

Didja Know

...that there is speculation as to whether Katie is even pregnant?

I really don't pay enough attention to this type of stuff. Or is that a good thing?

Neat story: Why it pays to be nice to the casting director.

Much cooler... this guy's website. Context here.

Not cool: my blog right now. I'm bored. Yawn.

Sources say Keith's CSI: Miami episode airs May 1st. And that he's been in promos airing on CBS already this week. Woo! (Thanks for the tip, Liz!)

Posted by bonnie at 6:59 AM | Comments (3)

April 4, 2006

Is It Just Me?

Or does everyone still do the "A-B-C-D-E-F-G..." twist of the stem before biting into a yummy apple, using the letter of "break off" as an indicator of the initial of future spouse? I mean, I've been married for ten months now (almost) and I still twist the stem off to find out who I'll marry. This morning: G is the magic letter. Sorry, Keith.

Okay, so this is going to be a way catchupy post. There is so much going on.

Apparently, my talk at SAG was pretty rockstar. Now, I've done a lot of talks at a lot of places for a lot of actors. They're always good. (That's not me being obnoxiously over-confident, it's just true. I'm a generally fantastic public speaker.) But this one was just pegged-to-the-wall perfect on about every level. No idea why, but the group assembled (170 RSVPs, plus waitlist) was just READY to laugh. READY to learn. READY to be inspired by something I said at some point. It was really awesome.

I started my time on Miracle Mile with a lovely solo dinner at Marie Callender's: a tuna melt 86 all bread-type stuff and a glass of Ferrari-Carano. Yum! My waiter saw me reading (and annotating) a script and asked about it. Natch, he's an actor and will be submitting on the film I'm currently casting (which is not the script I was reading at dinner). That's always fun. That's twice in two nights I've chatted up a waiter type about coming in for something I'm casting. It's LA, right?

Well, one of the items on my plate at dinner that I didn't eat AT dinner was a lovely little red apple. I just had it for a wee-hours snack. Yum!

Okay, so... I didn't want to scoop KiKi about our IRL meeting (and dinner with Keith and KiKi's PAM), but he's blogged about it now so I can say: WHEEEEEEEEEEEE! It was so cool! And he TOTALLY wore one of the red shirts (still not sure which one). We really were all over each other with giggles and comments and crosstalk and tangents. He's right, it'll be even better when we meet up again and have a little more focused energy on... well... just about anything. ;) Focus was just NOT our priority. What fun!

Y'know what else is fun? Receiving an email from the director of one film I cast, who was in Florida for the film festival screening and Q&A for said film. She also happened to catch screenings of other films at the festival, including another film I cast. She didn't know it was a film I cast until my name came up in the final credits, at which point she said, "Of course. Another great Bonnie Gillespie cast." And she emailed me to say so. What fun! Maybe I'm competent as a casting director after all. Yay!

Okay, back to work. Oh, but first, a comment I made over at an actors' web board that was met with much love and applause:

If you play the odds, there's no reason to attempt this career.
If you live your dreams, there's no reason NOT to give it a shot.
If you like to analyze your chances... well... that's actor mind taffy, plain and simple.

< Ali >Word.< / Ali >

Happy Tuesday, everyone!

Posted by bonnie at 6:14 AM | Comments (7)

April 3, 2006

Linky

Too busy to actually post (speaking to like 175 actors at SAG in a couple of hours, dealing with drama--real and imagined--from others, all while doing the actual job I have to do... y'know... casting a movie), so here are some links and non-linked update stuffs.

Darwin Funny: flat-screen TV scam.
More Internet Survival: Geek to Live, which reminds me of a quote Keith found on one of his gaming sites (something about arguing on the Internet being like competing in the Special Olympics... sure, you can win, but you're still "special").
Writing for TV: when staffing season begins.
Pitching: details on a pitch.
Activism: seriously, go sign this petition to get headshots off eBay. *shudder* (See my post at HHH for gory-gories.)

Haven't done the rounds at the blogs yet today... did get a call from Argentum, which has booked me for an upcoming Fireside Chat. "Queen of Cactus Cove" is at Method Fest tomorrow (woo!) and the Atlanta Workshop Players will be here for a talk with me and a favorite agent (Robin Spitzer of Origin) and a favorite manager (Kathy Colorado of Unique Artists) on Wednesday. Way cool fun... I'm just too busy to write about it all, lately.

BTW, how am I supposed to get from the Westside to SAG without encountering UCLA traffic? Ugh. I need a nap.

Oh, and Lydia, you get to the site that does the fake movie posters by clicking on the linked text below the one poster I included in that blog post. ;) Have fun!

Posted by bonnie at 2:11 PM | Comments (4)

March 27, 2006

Dirt

Note: I put the "framework" of a "future blog post" into the "unpublished" mode at 8:15pm on Sunday. It is now 2:48am Monday and I finally have time to finish this blog post (read: make it make sense, add images, and create links to relevant stuffs) and publish it for reals. But I'm thinking I may like it BETTER this way. It's sort of haiku-ish, no? Hmm.
==========
Origin's Spice Odyssey

Like Dirt

Which is from a show I've never seen, but I watch enough

Best
Soup
Ever (David Spade)

to know that the Bangin' Weepin' Hetero is selling something called Dirt.

Anyway, it's really good. Smells nice. And although it's weird to use, I enjoy adventures in bathtime.

Big week ahead. What do you think of The PodCASTing Report by Bonnie Gillespie? Would you subscribe to that? Hmm.
===========
Yeah. That may be my new blog style. Well, for now that's how this post will stand, anyway. I must get some sleep. Gotta sub for Cujo's mom in a few hours. 'Nite!

Posted by bonnie at 2:48 AM | Comments (4)

March 23, 2006

Deep Thoughts

Why is "Jack" short for "John"?
Why is "Hank" short for "Henry"?

I mean, I get "Dick" for "Richard" (even though "Rich" makes more sense) and "Liz" for "Elizabeth".

But "Bitsy" from "Elizabeth"? And "Peggy" from "Margaret"?
How?

Posted by bonnie at 12:19 PM | Comments (8)

March 20, 2006

Monday Morning Search Party

Realizing we haven't had a Search Party in awhile... (and in honor of "erik patterson is a gay google" showing up in the searches that lead folks to KiK*'s site, it must be time)!

*Didja notice how I shortened your nickname? Does that mean MAP calls you Iki now? Didja also notice I totally fudged the placement of this "resolved asterisk" in order to not leave you hangin'?

Please pretend I'm a fraction of the funny that is CoCo, when she does her searches.

bonnie's bookstore activation code: Wow! I have NO idea what that means, but I really like it. I WISH I had some secret activation code that would lay out a store full of books ala me. Ooh! Like a secret room in the Batcave or something at Q's headquarters! What a fantasy! I'm more literary than I thought I was. Mom would be so proud! (I wonder if journalist momass punk is proud, just for good measure.)

invalid sibling link: I'm sure this search has to do with the computer hell that I faced a couple of months ago (jeez--not even), but I like the idea that it has more to do with brothers of unusual relations (Rodents of Unusual Size?) and non-existent connections. No?

"do not eat" poem poetry: Girl, please! If I could "do not eat" more, I'd be back at my fighting weight (whatever that is). Of course, I've written many an ode to the size of my ass and my addictive behavior regarding food and drink. I still believe that someday I'll be one of those freakshow women who gains only 10 pounds when she's pregnant but then drops like 60 pounds after giving birth. It's the "knocked up" diet. If it didn't involve a major change in my daily schedule, I'd so do that diet right now!

bonnie sex free: Sadly, that's sometimes true. Damn. Is it normal to get laid less in your 30s than you did in your 20s? Oh, wait. "Sex-free" wasn't hyphenated. So, it actually is a search of "sex... free," right? Oh. Well. No. Never free. I mean, duh. I am a female. There is always a price. Oh, and it may be of interest that this particular search came from Pakistan. No. Comment.

bonnie young girls 8 to 10: Okay, stop that! NO pedophile pornographers here! NO! (Is anyone else hearing Peter Griffin telling the TV "No! You HAD yours!" while trying to feed Magnum PI through the screen after the Y2K end of days? No? Just me? Hmm.)

copy right 2005 drunk org: Wow. Did you define my year or what? KIDDING! Or AM I?

should Isaac Mizrahi work Oscars red carpet: I think any of us who saw him do it would weigh in with a big fat NO. But, what do we know? Stupid Ryan Seacrest is earning millions of dollars to Botox up his face and make life hell for all other E! folk. Right, Chairman? Oh, I've never been so proud to share an ATL radio background with someone. PSYCHE!

Hollywood insider blog: Well... of course. ;) I sure as hell love that! It falls in line with my secret truth that I'm feeding into search engines everywhere. Ready?

"Is it true that Erik Patterson and Bonnie Gillespie secretly run Hollywood?"

Bring it, searchers.

BTW--NO RUG IS SAFE in the Gillespie-Johnson household. Blame Thwok. But for reals. NO RUG... NO! Photos to follow. Keith is on a rampage.

PS--You now have 11.5 hours to comment. I think. Good luck!

Posted by bonnie at 3:35 AM | Comments (9)

March 18, 2006

"It's White Smoke. It's healthy!"

That's what our waiter and restaurant owner/master chef Juliano told us just before we took our first bites of the desserts we'd happily ordered, after having feasted on a delicious appetizer and three very differently delicious entrees.

He told us that just as he waved a burning bunch of sage in our faces.

The funny thing is, we had just finished a conversation about how no one we know smokes anymore and how great the new, super-strict smoking ban in Calabasas is.

So, we couldn't help but laugh at Juliano's stop at our table, even though we'd managed to not laugh the three other times he came by, shirt buttoned in only ONE place, pants AND button-up boxers not buttoned AT ALL. *giggle* I guess you can do that sort of thing when your name's on the restaurant. *heeeeee*

Okay, so this was the day of dates with couples, really. Even though I started off with JLD and the Chandler Hall (yes, my name was misspelled in the credits) world premiere (oh, and the screening of a very clever, fun, outstanding short called Apocalypse Oz), it was the fun time before and after the screening, hanging out at his pad with the lovely costar/girlfriend Shanna that was the most delightful. (And OMG how precious is their dog Theodore? So precious!) After that, I caught up with Shon and Jodi in another of our famous "we didn't plan it but it worked out" moments. And, wow! Was Juliano's YUMMY!!!! I could eat RAW forever! Y'know, if it didn't cost so freakin' much. Wow. Good thing for that tax refund, eh Shodi?

Our shared menu:
PUMPKIN TORTELLINI $9.24 Pockets of cheese slightly warm & drizzled with oil & herb or marinara.
GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH $15.70 Thick pine nut cheese between flax and buck crackers w/ guacamole, tomato, & cilantro. Rich.
GREEN CURRY PASTA (THAI) $22.18 Zucchini and mango pasta mixed with an amazing thai nut curry cream topped with coconut noodles.
SUN BURGER BURRITO $12.47 Not as serious as the western bacon double but still quite intriguing… Salad, mustard, ketchup, mayo, pickles, meat, avo or wrapped in a collard green.
APPLE PIE $9.24 Spiced apples & vanilla cream.
CHOCOLATE PARFAIT $9.24 Will definitely do the trick.
BEST EVER CHEESE CAKE $9.24 Ask for the flavor of the day. (It was coconut today. Yum!)

Oh, and KiKi, you are famous in my real life. Shodi asked whether I'd be suggesting that you do a "new thing" and eat at Juliano's. *giggle*

PS--Is Rachel McAdams a cross between Eliza Dushku and Jennifer Garner or is it just me?

Posted by bonnie at 11:23 PM | Comments (2)

March 17, 2006

Dates With Men Who Aren't My Husband

Okay, so I have a goodly number of dates coming up with boys/men who aren't the boy/man I'm married to. And suddenly the former Marine is bristling and marking his territory.

Now, I love the guy, but I'm wondering if perhaps I shouldn't have given him my blog address. Not because I don't love him and all... but because, MAN do boys get all territorial. I mean, I'm talking about something that happened 20 years ago (see IkIk's comments--AKA my secret blog entry pages--for details), planning a morning movie with a future superstar I cast in a film (yes, he's wonderful--he's like one of the few actors on the planet who GETS that the coolest date you can ever take to your film's world premiere is the casting director who put you in that movie), eagerly hopping up and down about my future date with IkIk and his MAP (hellooooo, Keith... just because I met YOU online does not mean that I'm going to marry EVERY boy I meet online EVER), and simply enjoying my job which involves finding actors of BOTH GENDERS very attractive and castable. And how is that threatening?

Ah, well... I guess I'll get it right back in my face when he books the gig on a series in which he must kiss some vapid see-you-next-Tuesday on camera and I get to not only hear about it but watch it on infinite reruns. Lucky, lucky me.

Jodi, are you happy now? See! We DO have the issues! ;)

Oh! BTW, I believe the comments are broken... like the first morning.

I keep getting emails from folks telling me they're trying to comment. So, well... I've tried (again) to adjust the settings and I hope I'm making it easier for y'all to comment (but not making it so that I'm spammed relentlessly through fake comments and trackbacks). *sigh* Yo, Texas Sarah, I am soooooo ready to hire you as my assistant. For reals. Maybe you could fix the comment thing. Or at least field the ones that come through to about ten different email addresses. OH! BTW, I recently deleted EIGHT different email addresses I used to have. That's deep.

PS--Biggest piss-in-my-pants laugh I've had today (other than during My Name Is Earl, which was simply brilliant tonight) came from reading the recent exchange between Def Jam Becca MC, PAM, Urp, Erik, and me at KiKi's/IkIk's blog. I swear, I'd love to get through a whole post without talking about my NBF(F) Erik, but I just can't. Damn. Coco hooked me up but good. Again.

Yes, this post is light on the links (and has no photo). That happens when you have a job-job to finish before sunrise. God bless the survival job! No matter how Hollywood you get. ;)

PPS--I think I'm going to start doing what EriK does (dammit! I mentioned him again!! I must be soooo in love!!!!!!) and reply to comments IN the comments. Not only will that make my comment count rise, but it'll make my replies more public and perhaps more (egad) interesting.

Aw, hell... what do I know? Maybe comments will be broken for me too and that'll just suck beyond all. But at least I'll know the comments are broken earlier. Maybe.

PPPS--Am I the only one on the planet who believes having a MySpace account is completely unnecessary? Or am I missing something?

PPPPS--OMG, I tried so hard to make a comment to the post below about KiKi's foot. I reset the settings and nothing worked. Dammit!!!!!!!!!! So, here's what I said, since I really tried to comment in comments and now no one can comment in comments, it seems.
----------
Okay, here's my first shot at posting replies within my own comments. Wish me luck!

Nini--so so so so glad the book finally arrived. Do you really think it's sexier than the book you received layst year? Oooooh, I'm just so happy! Miss you. Love you. Please move to elay soon.

Ed, I would never tattoo my foot, but I am a big fan of writing on myself with a Sharpie, so be ready to see photos of that nature after KiKi and I meet in person and write on each other.

Since I'm big ol' gluten free, there's very little of the Outback foods I can have, but they did take care of me, somehow. It was yummy.

KiKi, I had to crop. I HAD to. I simply had to assume that some of my readers wouldn't clink to your blog in order to see your comments about your own Brit-Spears-grocery-store-feet experience, and, well, I had to cover, just to be sure.

And, yes, we have a very specific-earlier-than-your-PAM-shows-up meeting time. Yay! We shall have a time. No doubt!

This was my first time commenting on my own comments. I hope it works.
----------

Ha ha, punkassbon. It didn't work.

Back to the post.

Anyway...

Please pretend this post was interesting.

Posted by bonnie at 1:38 AM | Comments (21)

March 11, 2006

¡Hasta!

Keith says I'm NOT allowed to cross the border and smuggle drugs back home.

Dangit! He NEVER lets me do any of the cool things the kids from 90210 got to do. *stomp* *pout*

PS--While I'm gone, here's a big BIG happy birthday to Brody and Ali, two of my favorite people on the planet! Love y'all! Bye.

Posted by bonnie at 5:42 AM | Comments (4)

March 10, 2006

Howdy!

Oh my, my, my, my, my. Busy gal. But I did want to come by and say HOWDY!

Taxes got pushed back 'til I return from San Diego next week (subbing Billy Cowart's classes there) and I'm seriously grateful for that. Even after a couple dozen non-stop hours of working on our financials, I still had/have work to do. Should finish it all up today. Phew.

Made offers to two name actors for HILMMAKS today. That is seriously so much fun! Yippee! The other feature film I'm casting is on hold while producers get some legal stuff together (they weren't as ready to begin casting as they'd thought at our meeting earlier this week), which is good b/c it gives me a bit of breathing room to (hopefully) get some deals made on HILMMAKS before issuing the next breakdown.

Spoke to Billy DaMota's class at the Strasberg Institute last night. That's always such fun! Really talented kids over there. And catching up with Billy is a blast. He has a new book that we may publish through Cricket Feet. Stay tuned on that.

Keith is at an audition, then off to CSI Miami casting for his intern gig. I'm hoping to get our financial statements to a good "finishing point" before he gets home, so that I can then get my column written (early) and do some Roxbury work before leaving town. I'm very much looking forward to being entirely offline for a few days. There's something very comforting about that sort of break from the daily noise.

Let's see... other things to catch y'all up on...

Books are selling remarkably well. I'm so very pleased with how happy folks are with Self-Management for Actors. In fact, it's in stores now, so the numbers should continue to increase this month. Yippee! More important than sales, to me, is that people like the revisions. That's a big ol' happy. Otherwise, as long as we don't lose money on the printings, I'm just fine and dandy.

When I went to update the Cricket Feet site with some more screenings for Queen of Cactus Cove, I did a little poking around to see what's up with some of the other films I've cast. Holy crap, y'all! Hombre Kabuki also got into a qualifying festival for the Academy Awards, which means it is entirely possible (though certainly not probable, but a girl can dream, right?) that TWO FILMS I cast will be up for Best Live Action Short Film on Oscar night, 2007. HOLY CRAP, RIGHT?

Also, I learned that Chandler Hall will have its world premiere next weekend at The Other Venice Film Festival. I don't know anything about the fest, but I'm so freakin' excited to get to see how the film turned out. The film's website has a trailer and stills. Looks great! And honestly, I've been so busy that I haven't even had a chance to add a link to that site from the Cricket Feet site--nor have I edited together MY casting demo reel, which includes clips from all of these films that are (all at once it seems) starting to become available.

Hmm. Maybe I'll do some of that here, and y'all can go see the trailers on the sites where they currently live, and I'll use this post as a reminder to myself to come back and do all of this linking from the Cricket Feet site when I have a chance.

Ha!

I haven't even gone blog-reading all week for the most part. Eesh! I am one busy Bon! Okay, I'm going to go ahead and post this entry even though it's really boring and then I'll try to come back before I head south in order to link up some trailers. Man, I need an assistant.

===========

BACK: Okay, here are some links to trailers, if you'd like to see some of what I do for a living (outside of writing, which you can see every week).

Queen of Cactus Cove trailer.
Chandler Hall trailer is available here.
Hombre Kabuki trailer. (Hombre Kabuki came out of casting for Each To Each which is in post right now.)
The Moor trailer is up at the Cricket Feet site.

Posted by bonnie at 3:10 PM | Comments (4)

March 9, 2006

T-Minus 10 Hours

'til our appointment with the CPA.

I do not think I will have our corporate taxes finished in time.

What a craptastic day! Seriously, doing nothing but prepping financial statements for 15 hours after having been woken up at 7:10am (after having gone to bed at 4:50am) by an anxious producer makes for a crabby Bon. No sleep in sight for this gal. I think I'll have a shower to see if I can feel as though I have a fresh set of eyes for this mountain of paperwork.

AUGH! Why are taxes such a HUGE pain in the ass?!?!?

So much for giving up complaining for Lent, eh?

Posted by bonnie at 2:48 AM | Comments (3)

March 3, 2006

Interesting

Why is it, that when I have a desire to sleep I stay up all night, and when I need to stay awake (just for another 90 minutes, even), I am suddenly exhausted?

Weird.

Oh, and why do I have to stay up? Because Keith is SURE that Liz told him she was flying it at 8:35pm. Of course, she emailed me her itinerary, which says she's flying in at 8:35am. So, either:
a. Keith heard wrong and Liz will be waiting for him at the airport 12 hours earlier than Keith had planned to be there,
b. Keith didn't hear wrong and Liz doesn't realize she needs to be on an airplane in just under three hours,
c.
d. Keith didn't hear wrong and Liz has changed her flight since having emailed me the itinerary,
e. Keith didn't hear wrong but Liz has since figured it out and, in sending me her itinerary was hoping I'd make sure Keith had it right too,
f. or something else entirely.

I'm too exhausted to try and figure it out.

Point is, it is now my job to call Liz at 5:15am and make sure she's headed to the airport. And, if she has another 12 hours before she's due at the aiport, I get to hope she can fall asleep easier than Keith can, if he is ever woken up too early.

Happy birthday, my love. You get to sleep and I'm going to deal with this terribly typical Johnson family miscommunication, even though I really really really want to come to bed. You also get eleven new audition shirts. And a yummy cake. *giggle*

Posted by bonnie at 3:46 AM | Comments (4)

March 2, 2006

How To Make Me Happy for Three Bucks

Buy me something way geeky, way useful, and way cheap. You'll have my heart forever.

See, people love their iPods. They even dress like them for Halloween. So cool.

Well, I got my first iPod (a Shuffle) as a present when we had the whole Zed's Dead fiasco last month. While Keith was at the Apple Store wiping clean my computer's brain, he saw Shuffles on sale for under a hundred bucks and, well, there ya go. My first iPod. I'm late to the party, but I always manage to show up.

Click to enlarge.

Now, most folks already know about this. Apple's lawyers feel the need to warn you against eating the iPod. Some people even write poetry about it. So, of course, when the time came to name the iPod, I chose the only logical name I could think of. DO NOT EAT IPOD.

So, where does the "three dollar gift can make me so happy" thing come in? Well, Keith bought a three dollar cable that does two things. It allows me to plug my iPod into my car stereo's auxilary jack. Awesome. Good. Commercial free music... all of my favorites. Makes for good driving. We love that.

But here's the best thing this cable will do for me. Stand back technophobes, we're goin' analog here. This cable will allow me to take my mix-tapes from decades ago (and since then) and IMPORT THE MUSIC INTO MY IPOD! I will be able to take music that was originally on a 45 or LP record and then put on a cassette tape (and played in my car stereo [tape deck version] no fewer than three thousand times, I'm sure) and DIGITIZE IT so that I can have it in my iPod and then in my car stereo [CD version] all over again!

As I told my dear online friend and iPod lover KiKi in a recent comment exchange, there is plenty of room for failure (inconsistent levels, bad sound, pops, hisses, and crackled tape), but I DON'T CARE! I'm so excited to get some of my mix-tapes back into my "system."

It's been so long since I've put a cassette into a tape deck (stupid Keith replaced my car stereo [when it died in 2003] with one that has a CD player instead of a cassette deck. HELLOOOOO! I DRIVE A SIXTEEN-AND-A-HALF-YEAR-OLD TWO-SEATER ROADSTER THAT HOPS AT EVERY PEBBLE IN THE ROAD. WHAT DO I WANT WITH A CD PLAYER? WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH ALL OF THESE BOOKS ON TAPE?!? Ugh! Men!) that I don't even know if those lonely mix-tapes will even still roll. But man, we're gonna try to make it happen. And I may just even scan in all of the hand-written-with-love liner notes from those homemade-with-love cassettes. Oh, I am sooooo looking forward to this project.

Suddenly, I am absolutely positively aware of how I will successfully avoid doing our corporate taxes on time. Yup. I have a much more important project stretched out before me.

Posted by bonnie at 4:27 AM | Comments (4)

February 27, 2006

Two Days of Driving

Well, actually it's two days of guest-speaking, but there's also the driving to get there.

That's from mi casa to Moorpark College. It's way far. Way. But it's not the far I dislike. It's the traffic. I'm going super early and taking my iPod and a script I'm supposed to have read by now, in case I'm so ahead of traffic that I have to park and chill 'til showtime.

And that's from mi casa to UCLA. Dude. I could walk in as much time as it'll take for me to drive to Moorpark. Oh don't worry... I WON'T... but I could. ;)

If you want to receive emails about when I'm out and speaking and such, sign up for the Cricket Feet mailing list and you'll be all set. OH! By the way... WOW! Am I getting a buttload of email about this (and last) week's column! Woo! Controversy, baby! Woo! LOVE IT! BRING IT ON, BITCHCAKES!

Finally, had to share this (from a blog that scooped this info off another blog):

Avoid message boards unless you have a major dilemma. A lot of the people on message boards have serious complications and they will inevitably scare you to death.

*giggle* Totally out of context, I really like that. I've been limiting my message board time lately and I'm definitely healthier for it.

Enjoy the rain! Be safe! Rainy days and Mondays always get me off (no, that is not a typo). I LOVE 'EM!

Posted by bonnie at 6:45 PM | Comments (3)

February 23, 2006

Embracing Inefficiency

Before I really get into the meat of this post, let me begin by saying this: I am giving myself three gifts, as a part of composing this apologia.^1 I will take a long time to compose this post. It's too important to rush through. After that, I will finish a long overdue email to the greatness that is Nate (who is giving and caring, and who has a HAWT wife). Finally, I will post a similarly long overdue series of comments about 90210 and other important issues of our day to my NBF's blog. These are my gifts to me and I deserve them. If it should come to pass that I am too exhausted after writing this to do those other things, those things will come FIRST after sleep. Yes, that's before work. Period.

Now, on to the post wherein I describe how embracing inefficiency has vastly improved my life. Warning: This shall be a long read, should you dare to read it all, yo.

Zed's Dead, Baby. Zed's Dead.

Well, y'know my computer crashed not too long ago. I see this experience as the forcing of a hard reset on MY operating system. Sure, I had the recent backup of many of my active files, but things I would never think about backing up became "new issues," as I rebuilt. As I began only loading software onto my computer AS I NEEDED IT, I realized that I was keeping around a whole mess of software I never used. Why? Did I think I might, someday, go back to something that only launches on OS9 when I've been using OSX exclusively for several years now? Much as I hung onto that AuthorWare Manual for years beyond its relevance or Charlsie kept a set of encyclopedias from when the solar system didn't include Pluto, I had become a packrat for relics in the software realm. And not just software! My goodness, there were all manner of things living on my computer that, when forced to reassemble the damn thing, I realized were not at all necessary.

Am I crushed that my dozens of bookmarks to handy lists on gluten-free foods are suddenly gone? Crushed? No. Bummed. Mildly. And it's a big Internets. I'm sure I'll finds 'em all again. Or not.

What about all of those posts I had bookmarked? Things I was going to reply to "someday" on message boards or at Yahoo groups? Man, maybe it's like that sweater at the back of your closet. You haven't worn it in three years? You ain't gonna start wearing it this season, sister!

So, just as I packed up bags and bags and bags of clothes for clothes-swaps with dear friends (and off to Goodwill with the rest of them) at the time of our move to Santa Monica, I see my computer's crash as a bit of closet-cleaning.

Is it inefficient to begin paying the bills and then to suddenly realize that I no longer have the bookmarks, logins, or passwords to any of my accounts? Sure. But y'know what? None of that stuff "went away." It's still out there. I just have to find it. And until I have the time to bother with that, I'll pull out the good ol' fashioned checkbook and pretend I'm a husband from the '50s, in the den chewing on my pipe with my brandy after dinner, telling my wife to scamper off, as I'm doing "men's business" and taking care of the family.

Lost phone numbers? So what! Y'know, I couldn't find a phone number for a producer who wants to hire me to cast a film (and who has been trying to reach me for days). BIG EFFIN' DEAL. Y'know what I finally did, after *almost* panicking that this guy's number could NOT be Googled, figured out from our Caller ID, or found in any stored email exchange (much less on any scrap of paper somewhere in the house)? I called the people who referred him and THEY gave me his number. Holy cow! There are ways to do things that have roots in very sensible, old-school behaviors. Totally inefficient to spend ten minutes on the phone with someone to whom I otherwise have little business to relay (And in the middle of a work day!) just to get a phone number that AN EFFICIENT BONNIE WOULD BE ABLE TO FIND, right? Sure. But we had a great chat and may have advanced ANOTHER project in the process. Pff! Bless my inefficiency and the rebuilding of the computer's brain.

"Getting to Empty" Isn't for Everyone. Especially me.

Now, my lovely friend and mentor CoCo has written about GTD and this bizarrely elusive "getting to empty" concept. This reminds me of a book I bought when I was beginning recovery for my decade-long prescription drug addiction. It was called "Step Zero" or something like that (and no, I'm not looking it up and linking to it because I don't remember that that's what it was called and I don't think I ever really read the whole thing anyway). I seem to recall something about the theory that you cannot even begin your recovery (at Step One, ala so many 12-step programs) until you've completed Step Zero. This isn't the same as reaching Rock Bottom, though they do seem to happen within moments of one another.

Every time I read posts on GTD and 43 Folders and all of those other things that would normally make an organizational nut like me as happy as being given a bottomless shopping cart in an office supply store, I get frustrated that I'm not more excited about it all. I think I've figured out why: I've not reached Rock Bottom with my GTD-related issues. And why would I? I am amazingly skilled at getting things done when left to my own devices. Why would I rebel against a system that already works (and quite well, thank you) just so that I could begin again, using a system created for those who find their "order" more in "chaos" than my "chaos" even ever becomes?

So, in honor of the fact that I have no plan to reach Step Zero on this issue, I embrace the inefficiency of MY system. It may not be so very quantifiable and definable as to spawn its own cult (although some would say that ONE of my "systems" has, in fact, done exactly that), but I am not here to inspire anyone on how to be as organized as I am. Nor do I need to aspire to be as organized as someone else, if it means I have to "get to empty" in order to do that. Why throw out what works in order to start over with something that may or may not work as well for me? Embracing the inefficiency of my "system" is a better step, anyway.

So Long, Multitasking, You Unhealthy Bitch.

Another way in which I am embracing inefficiency is in working against my Cancer-the-crab-like tendencies. As any good astrologer will tell you, Cancers not only love love love LOVE their own space, their cozy little homes, and their creature-comforts, they also carry everything around with them in their very efficient all-in-one shell suitcase. Yup. Totally me. But I wasn't always like this. My family loves to tell the story of my fascination with bath time (not mine, my brother's). When I, a toddler, would hear the water running in our one full bathroom's bathtub, I'd stop whatever I was doing, runrunrunrunrun into my bedroom, throw open the toy box, grab a favorite doll or stuffed animal in each hand, and then runrunrunrunrun into the bathroom, tossing each into the tub. My brother (an adult home from college for the weekend) would have started the water running and gone back upstairs to gather his clothes, shaving kit, etc. Meanwhile, as the water inched up in the tub, I would runrunrunrunrun back and forth, back and forth, two little hands clutching Lambie Pie or Bearie, legs going runrunrunrunrun, eventually filling the tub with a population of dozens of animals and toys, which would result in my brother's cry, "MUH-THURRRRR!!! She did it again!" At which point, I would plop down on the floor of the bathroom and laughlaughlaughlaughlaugh until I was forced to leave the room so that he could drain the tub, scoop out the toys, and begin his process again.

Nowadays, I couldn't imagine making so many trips. Not for any amount of laughter or silliness or (gasp!) even productivity. I am efficient, dammit! I make ONE trip, and I always make sure I've planned it just so. When I run errands, I have my route mapped out so that I am using the best roads at the best times, getting parking at the best spots, moving with the flow of activity rather than against it, and making as few left turns as possible. If I have three loads of bags to carry up from the car, I will--oh yes, I will, and don't you think I won't do it--manage to get ALL three loads of bags attached to my body SOMEHOW and all of the "stuff" WILL get inside at the same time. This makes Keith crazy. He totally doesn't understand it.

Well, in having a VERY willing-to-make-many-trips partner, I've developed a "queen of all that I survey" personality. I spend my days high atop the Couch Catalina and when I need a refilled water bottle, my Keith goes and gets it for me. When I am hungry, my Keith brings me food that he has lovingly prepared for me, the certified kitchenphobe. When I am finished eating, my Keith takes my plate away. "Hand me the phone, honey." "Can you get that fax for me?" I've even taught him to do the things that I always did for my mother, growing up (anyone who was raised southern will know this one). As you get up to get yourself something, you ask, "Do you need anything?" Yup. My Royal Subjects serve me quite well. Never do I need to cross a room to get a drink at the bar. I have become a total Queen of Sloth, only rising from my throne when my bladder or bowels require I visit the other one.

No more! I realized that I could DOUBLE, no, even TRIPLE my in-house level of activity and break this sedentary lifestyle up a bit simply by filling up my own damn water bottle, "bussing my own table," and otherwise doing a very childlike-glee-inducing thing from my own life: one hand = one item, as many trips as possible, and runrunrunrunrun. I AM LOVING THIS INEFFICIENCY! Oh my, there is so much movement to be HAD, if we just think of ONE thing we need to do at a time.

Who the HELL knew that multitasking, combined with very seriously-busy-ness and a live-in enabler, could make a person UNHEALTHY?!?

Streamlining Email.

Another bit of progress in my campaign to embrace inefficiency has to do with something I read, well, over at 43 Folders, b'gosh! Now, I'll say that many of the tips suggested in more comprehensive intimidating articles on the subject have LONG been in place in my Entourage. Comes with having so many email addresses and so many different clients, projects, and 7500 contacts in my address book. So, items like system rules I've created for email routing and in-box traffic control, color coding for easy reference, messages automatically linked to contacts for retrieval after they've been archived, and a hard-archive system for older-than-a-year stuff were already in place. In the past year (when my inbox went from 1000 un-dealt-with-but-replies-are-due messages to 2000, and now, to 4801 [and yes, that's an inbox that has several subdirectories whose messages I'm NOT counting AND one which gets archived and deleted from REGULARLY]), I began using the flag (and "flagged" folder) for certain messages, immediately filing messages that didn't require a reply but that needed to exist locally for potential future reference, and deleting ANYTHING I printed out or saved to a project file elsewhere on my system.

It's only since reading this quick article and surviving my Zed's Dead computer fiasco that I changed the interval of auto-check from eight minutes to 28 minutes (and I'm toying with the idea of going to 68 minutes next). I also began deleting with more reckless (and non-OCD/fairness-based) criteria. I used to think, if I deleted an email that came in today that met X criteria, I should also apply that "filter" to yesterday's mail.^2 That sort of thinking forced me to keep emails I otherwise KNEW I should just toss, seeing as: "It's not fair to the email I kept from yesterday for me to toss this one today. Who am I to decide whose email is of more value than another's?" Who? I'M THE ONE RUNNING THIS G4, BABY, THAT'S WHO!

Delete. Delete. Delete.

Woo!

AND... Merlin Mann is right. There is very little that I miss in the 20 extra minutes of focused time I get, while my system is not sending me emails that interrupt me faster than I can even get started on another task.

When I really want to be productive, I quit out of email altogether or "work offline" so that I can get many replies written without the constant influx of replies to those replies which force me to get further behind on my older, flagged emails. (Remember those days? Before the high-speed Internet connection? When your email life was budgeted by the amount of hours you had left before you reached your account's dial-up limits? More productive, otherwise, right? Thought so!)

I no longer write my column each week with the regular interruption of the email "mail's in" sound. I write my column with my headphones on, iTunes churning happily away, getting up to refill water as needed, and staying mindful of my column's topic, rather than constantly having to stop and get refocused after fielding an email about a casting gig, showcase, or any other non-column-writing issue. Oh, and since doing that, I've been told SEVERAL TIMES that my columns are GREAT. Now, I'm not talking about the standard, "Hey, love your columns," stuff that happens. I'm getting really specific feedback about the quality of my work. And this couldn't be more important right now. If "the deal" goes through, we're talking major syndication, baby. EFFIN' RIGHT! No email is going to interrupt THIS writer today. Oh, hells no!

As for other rules of the email variety, here's one for people who send emails to all of their friends at once without using BCC. These Darwin Award Winners have a special "rule" to which their emails adhere. Those are routed directly into the "Addresses" subfolder. Yup. You have a friend who sends out email without masking the addresses of all recipients? If that email gets to me, I'm keeping your address. Not sure what I'm going to do with it, but it'll either go on MY mailing list or someday, if I'm looking for extra money to buy something really silly, instead of rolling pennies, I'll sell email addresses to Spammers. For whatever reason, I'm keeping these addresses--some people save string--and disregarding whatever the email was about. Ha!

Imperfection Is Gorgeous.

Okay, so another aspect of embracing inefficiency has to do with embracing imperfections. I remember writing a poem in high school called "Perfection." The first two lines were:

"Perfection. My best friend.
Perfection. My worst enemy."

Yeah, I was way tortured (in a Cure song--not a Smiths song--kind of way). Point is, I've always known that perfection both drives me and tortures me. Part of why I do so many things so very well is because I expect perfection and come pretty dang close to achieving it pretty much most of the time. And... that'd be why I am so very demanding and unforgiving (mostly of myself, but also of others). I have a very low tolerance for imperfection. And that can't be healthy. Life IS imperfect. Humanity IS imperfect. An absolutely lovely reminder of that came to me in the mail this week.

The amazing, beautiful, wise, and courageous Pamela Jansen is someone I met online, then met in person, then cast in a film. She is featured in the book Fearless Women: Midlife Portraits, which I talked about receiving in a post over at TalentPIMP.com.^3 A few weeks ago, she called to let me know that a special envelope was on its way to me, please look for it. It took awhile, but it finally showed up last week, while I was so sick. It had been a bit damaged in the mail (which I totally understand, lately^4), but I believe the item inside was no worse for the wear. It was (it is) a stunning blue and silver beaded bracelet. Absolutely breathtaking. Perfect for me. In Pamela's letter, she said:

"Don't look too close, 'cause you'll see a few flaws, but then again, you wouldn't know for sure that it's an original."

Right on. Inefficiency is imperfect. And, it too, is beautiful.

More Music, Less TV.

Having to start over on my computer (in many aspects, though certainly not entirely, thank the mighty backup drive), I found myself having to re-import all of my CDs into my iTunes. Now, this certainly isn't as important as rediscovering old bookmarks to bank accounts and casting logins, right? Well, maybe it is. See, I had (before the crash) decided to turn off the TV and listen to music. So, that meant getting the music back into my computer for the times when Keith needed to have the TV on or when doing the XML through the TV was otherwise impractical. Of course, I had done a lot of customizing, rating, and artwork/lyrics importing in the years since first setting up my iTunes. This time? Had to start from scratch and there's something really nice about that. I had no time to pick and choose which tracks to import, so I just tossed all of our CDs onto my iTunes and now, as I listen to each song, I go in and give it a rating AS WE GO and, if I don't like that song, I delete it. Totally inefficient to have imported it in the first place, right? Pff! Whatever! I am loving a project that should seem ridiculously tedious. What does that tell ya?

Okay, so what does any of that have to do with the "less TV" part? Well, working from home provides many opportunities to have the TV on simply as background "noise" for the day's events. But y'know, there's a LOT of bad news out there. Even if you keep your TV tuned to "silly" stations and don't tune into local or national or international news, you're still going to get the teasers and previews and headlines that are the most shocking, gruesome, and soul-spiking (Because, of course, that makes the average viewer want to tune in for the whole story, right?) and that, somehow, must seep into your psyche and pollute you. Somewhere.

When I was in college, I was a part of a leadership honor society that was comprised basically of the "movers and the shakers" of UGA's senior class. Now, that's a lot of effin' people, so I get that it's a huge big deal that I was one of the top 40. Well, we first went on a retreat to build as a team, and then we spent the rest of the quarter attending leadership conferences and events all over the state. It was awesome.^5 One of those events was a talk put on by an expert in dealing with "Option Overload." Many of that day's college graduates were facing too many options from which to choose easily and this guy's talk was about the fact we (Americans) bombard ourselves with information and then we try to find someone to blame for our ADD, lack of focus, apathy, and lack of commitment to anything meaningful.

He's the first person I heard advise against watching the evening news. Specifically, he insisted that we NEVER watch the LATE news. His advice went something like this: "Whatever you do right before bed is with you in your early sleep. You fill your head with the thoughts you will work on overnight and these images and issues populate your dreams and impact your depth of rest and your waking state the next day. The LAST thing you need to put yourself through at the end of what may have been a fulfilling day is a 15-minute barrage of negative images, sounds, and up-to-the-second interviews about the impact of those horrific things on the people who experienced them (followed by a bit of weather and sports)." That did it for me! All I've done this time around is up the ante on that philosophy. Awesome.

Manual Correction.

And, finally, I have turned off auto-correct in my software. Yup. I no longer want my software to smarten me up. If I don't know how to spell a word, I want the little squiggly lines underneath to tell me, so that I can LEARN. Rather than having Word or Entourage automatically switch the letters that I transpose, I want to see those flaws, right there in the finished product, so that I can choose to edit (because I see what I did wrong), ask for a suggestion (because I doubt what I meant to type), or show me how it's spelled (because I simply don't know how to spell it). I think this stems from having comment-based dialogue with my NBF KiKi and his PAM (punkass mom). She praises us when we leave our typos in. There is something to be said for that kind of parenting. And as Keith has recently shared, at some point, we get to reparent ourselves to make up for where parenting was well-meaning but misguided (or worse). Inefficient to have to go through and (somewhat) "manually" correct misspellings? Sure. And I love it!

In Closing.

The overall effect of these changes is this: I no longer feel that I have to get it ALL done in order to get ANY of it done. Before, I wouldn't even START on a project unless I knew I could COMPLETE it (or a pre-determined, significant CHUNK of it) within the amount of time I had stretched out before me. Somehow now it's okay to be inefficient: to pull out a stack of headshots for HILMMAKS and not get through it before I have to stop, switch gears, and do something else (perhaps something else more important--gasp!) for a moment. I can put that stack aside (partially sorted) and pick it back up an hour later. Sure, that's inefficient. Sure, I wouldn't have to spend that, oh, 30 seconds reorienting myself before I plunge back in, but so what?!? The fact is, dialogue now goes like this in the Gillespie-Johnson household:

K: C'mon. Let's go for a walk.
B: Okay.

It used to go like this:

K: C'mon. Let's go for a walk.
B: Not now. Gotta finish this breakdown.
*30 minutes later*
K: Finished yet?
B: Yeah, but I need to find out what National Public Television AFTRA Scale is for a one-day shoot when it follows a week of an AEA run of the same show.
K: So... when?
B: I'll letcha know.

Repeat, repeat, repeat. Until finally I'm so fried and/or Keith's so tired that it's just not gonna happen. Oh, and feel free to replace "go for a walk" with "have dinner," "watch this movie and eat popcorn," "fool around," etc.

I don't see how this embracing inefficiency can possibly be a bad idea for me. I am perhaps the MOST organized person on the planet who can still actually function in society with some manner of skill and charm. Usually people who are as organized and efficient as I am are also quite mad or antisocial, in the Rainman, Se7en, As Good As It Gets, "Is everything in here as it should be, Laura?" kind of way. To step away from some of the self-inflicted MUSTS to my daily routine is to provide a space for more flow, more sunshine, more kisses, more DISCOVERY.

If observing YotL has taught me one thing already, it's that there is nothing you can DO to MAKE the amazing, beautiful, wonderful things happen in your life. All there IS to DO is to SLOW DOWN and SEE THEM. Everything amazing, beautiful, and wonderful is already here: inefficient, flawed, imperfect, and simply gorgeous. All of it.

Notes.

^1. When I took Judith Ortiz Cofer's amazing creative writing master class in grad school (where, by the way, I shared many good times with fellow SpyNotebooker and literary genius, Courtney), one of my assignments was to write an apologia on my life as a writer. [Def: ap·o·lo·gi·a: n a formal, usually written, defense or justification of a belief, theory, or policy (formal).] Basically, this was, "Why I write the way I write and how it is I write at all," written up.

I remember my English 101 class at UGA, fall quarter 1988 (nearly a decade before the Cofer class). First assignment: "Write an essay answering the following question: 'Are you a writer?'" I began timidly. I didn't want to presume I was a writer, even though I had written my first stage play at the age of seven, my first published poem at the age of ten, and had spent the better part of high school writing with the Literary Club and for the paper, yearbook, etc. But I thought that maybe I was, indeed, a writer, so I began my essay: "I write, therefore I am... a writer."

By the time I approached my apologia, I had written a script for The Simpsons, been published in more than a few local and regional newspapers, and had seen quite a few of my poems and short stories make it into fairly well-respected literary journals. I was definitely a writer, by now. But I still approached the apologia with some timidity and I think that's what taught me a connotation for "apologia" that I find appropriate.

Yesterday, I had a phone conversation with my writing partner from my third (and his first) book. He said that he had finally (after having published that book with me, and having since written two screenplays and one pilot spec script) gotten up the nerve to say, "I am a writer," and that he was going to say so at Tuesdays@9 that very evening.

I chose to declare this post on embracing inefficiency an apologia for the same reasons Blake needed to ramp up to calling himself a writer (and for the same reasons that I was okay with calling my Cofer-assigned apologia an apologia): I've not yet mastered this. But I still want to tell you why I'm embracing inefficiency, the ways in which I'm embracing inefficiency, and how it is I'm embracing inefficiency at all. Perhaps someday, I will feel that I have mastered this as much as "they" tell me I should I feel that I have mastered writing.

^2. This is actually how my headshot files got so out of control last year. I believed, if I kept the headshot of an actor I met at a panel discussion in 2003, I had to keep the headshots of ALL of the actors I met at that panel discussion, even if I'd never seen their work, thought their credits sucked, felt they'd personally be too creepy to ever inflict on the population of a set, or knew they lived on another continent. I finally got over that, late last year. It was time to create a home office that would function like a casting office. This was when the wall of cubbies was born and, frankly, when tens of thousands of headshots went into the big bin in the alley. And no, I don't care if it's not fair that I kept ONE actor's headshot from an event but dumped the photos of all of the other actors I met at that event.

Oh, and that little part of me that always said, "But what if someday you NEED that one actor's headshot from 2003? What if you someday WISH you hadn't thrown out that ONE headshot? Doesn't that make it worth keeping them all?" Yeah, I beat that little part of me down in a fight outside, right in the alley next to the big bin with all of the dumped headshots. This was the same week we chose to toss our Yellow Pages. Why did we ever bring them off the stoop and into the house? I don't think I've consulted a paper-based copy of the Yellow Pages in nearly a decade. Yes, it's true, the Internet could go down or 411 might not understand my request for the listing... y'know what? Worth the risk. And if someone whose headshot I dumped suddenly wins an Emmy and I wasn't smart enough to hang onto that photo from years before that actor was discovered? Well, believe me, I have enough of a photographic memory (and sense of sass) that I'm sure I'll say, "Aww! How cool to see that actor getting all of that success. I used to have a headshot...." And then I will MOVE ON. I will NOT cry that I tossed it out. I'm almost sure of that.

^3. If you are not a member of TalentPIMP.com, you can follow this link and enter the promotional code HHH (that stands for Hollywood Happy Hour). You will then have free run of the place for six months. So, just do it. It's way cool. You're welcome.

^4. It seems we got some cruddy envelopes in our order. Y'know, those big, padded envelopes for mailing promo copies of Self-Management for Actors all over the place? Yeah. The number of books I sent out in padded envelopes that arrived empty has risen to NINE (that we know of). Now, someone wanted me to be pissed about this. But here's my theory: Let's imagine that the glue came unstuck and the copy of the book landed on a floor somewhere in a post office. Fine. Let's imagine that the postal worker who finds the book has been looking for a life change. And suddenly there's this book. And this postal worker has always been pretty charismatic and funny and kind of wants to try acting. He reads my book, decides to try out acting, makes his way through the process with some success, and prevents the world from losing any more people to random postal worker shooting rampages. OR! Better still! He goes on to huge successes and thanks me in his Oscar speech for having, without ever having known it, changed his life. Okay, okay, okay, so maybe he sells the book on eBay and someone else who always wanted to try acting ends up with the book at a deep discount since it's on eBay and it's out before you can buy it at Amazon.com or something. And the postal worker uses the money he earned from that sale of something he filched to buy ammo and he ends up being happy because he's living his dreams to own lots of ammo and I somehow helped that along.

It's all good karma, right? Don't you judge me, Earl!

^5. Somewhere, I have an essay that I wrote about one of the team-building experiences I had during the ropes course with Leadership UGA. I'll have to find it and share it, at some point (although I'm sure that would require finding the hard copy and retyping it, since God only knows where it is, electronically... much less whether it would even work on a computer from this lifetime). Anyway, I wrote about the fact that I froze during the ropes course and had to be "talked down" from the top of the first rope ladder, where I had taken one step out onto the high wire and then decided to "become one with the tree." Yes, I knew I could trust my harness, my belay partner, and my helmet. It wasn't rational fear. It was panic. And it gripped me hard. Of course, there were other team-building events that night, and I talked about my fear and others talked about theirs (which most of them had conquered better). The thing is, I didn't KNOW that I had a fear of heights until I was UP THERE. I had no idea!

The next morning, up with the sun, we're off to go rappelling. I am the first one off the mountain. My partner, Lance, looked stunned at my voluntary leap up, racing to get into the harness and start my trip down a 150-ft. vertical wall of granite. At the end of that day, when we did the rest of our team-building events, we were asked to share with the group what it was that we would be left with, after this weekend. Lance said something to the effect of: "Bonnie shocked me. I saw her on the ropes course. She was TERRIFIED. I knew she had unveiled a fear in herself she didn't even know existed and it scared the hell out of her. But the next day, she was the first one off the mountain, catching air like a pro. That taught me that not every fear of heights is the same. And maybe fears that I have about certain things aren't the same as the fears with which I associate them, since they SEEM the same." I laughed (through tears) and said, "Well, that little wire strung between those two trees, 50 feet up, was ITTY-BITTY. That mountain was HUGE! Of course they're different!" Yeah, I know. Leave it to me to make a joke, but in this essay I'm talking about (an essay contributed to a future issue of a short-lived Leadership UGA Alumni Magazine we called "Belay ON!"), I somehow brought it all back around to the fact that with the support of an amazing team, any fear (even one that looks like it should be the same as one that froze you) is conquerable.

Beyond the Notes.

PS--two post-footnotes notes regarding my family at Somesuch-Whatnot.
1. I know there is never a three. But this, being an apologia, follows those rules first, then somesuch's. I'm sure you understand.
2. The whole time I've been writing this, I've been imagining Norm coming over here and posting the first comment: "Nuh-huh." If it weren't so far past his bedtime by the time I finished this effin' thing, I bet he would! *giggle*

Posted by bonnie at 12:29 AM | Comments (8)

February 22, 2006

Wow

I had a whole big plan stretched out in front of me. Couldn't sleep after having attempted a civil bedtime with Keith just after midnight, so I got out of bed 'round 1:20am and began doing a bit of work (I know, I know) and the rounds at the blogs and such.

Then I made a gluten-free mini-pizza.

And while I worked on it (It's a three-stage process that requires a lot of back-and-forth to the kitchen.), I composed a brilliant entry on one of my new favorite things, which I can't wait to blog about, but which is also pretty involved, therefore composing the entry will take some time. Okay, fine. Fair enough. Let's do that tonight. What a great project!

So, I begin as I always do. I search the Internet for an appropriate image file to put up. That takes awhile. Then I find a few pages I want to be sure to include (link-wise) in the blog, in case readers have questions or want to know what has inspired me so. Fine. Somewhere in there, I finish the prep on the pizza, eat it up, and watch an episode of Sex and the City (Kiki, it is the "I Have Cancer" episode ["The 'Ick' Factor," for the purists among you] and I am crying like I did the first two times I saw it. Such a happy thing, TV.), all while mentally composing this amazing blog entry on how inspired I've become by my new favorite thing.

And then fullbellyitis sets in. A sleeping kitty to my right reminds me that it is really quite late and sleeping feels so nice, especially when you're all curled up to someone warm and loving. So, I miss my husband and our warm bed. I decide to bookmark all of the places I had open in tabs, all set for quick-link-making. I delete the watched episode from my TiVo, post this little nonsense post instead of posting nothing, and head off to brush my teeth and go back to bed.

And by doing this, I am exercising EXACTLY the art I have learned to embrace (and hope to master) and that I cannot wait to share with you all: THE BLISS OF INEFFICIENCY. It has changed my life. And I'm now addicted to inefficiency.

I simply cannot wait to tell you all about it.

G'nite!

Posted by bonnie at 3:16 AM | Comments (5)

February 20, 2006

YotL

Let me take a moment to tell you about the Year of the Leemer.

I have this friend. He's my musical soulmate. He's a somesucher. He's a GMF and all around cool person. His last name is Leemer and I call him Leemsy. He has declared 2006 the Year of the Leemer (that's YotL, yo).

At his blog, he explained it like this:

What started out as a little mantra to myself, to make me realize what I am truly capable of, took off with a life of its own. And I love that. I mean, I really love that. The original intent was to make me get off of my ass and follow my dream, whatever that may be. However, I have found myself to be content living through the triumphs of others that are close to me who have embraced the YotL concept.

And YotL is definitely embraceable.

While I've been sick in bed this past week, I've received three messages from producers wanting to hire me to cast a pilot, a play, and a film. Yup. I've also received calls about covering acting classes at several very cool studios, guest-speaking all over the place, and even a pitch for another book... from a financing writing partner type. Yup. That's on top of the super-terrific "new" (additional, not instead of; existing MAJOR publication, not new rag) venue for my weekly column that's in the works.

YotL, yo.

Best yet, while I'm catching up with what's going on in the lives of my friends and colleagues, I notice that many (perhaps MOST even) of them have seen very big advances in their professional lives already in this short year. Cooooool. Just like Leemsy, I'm thrilled to see others basking in success they've so well earned. There is nothing so exciting as celebrating successes with dear friends. To all of you, I want to explain that, without knowing it, you've embraced the spirit of the Year of the Leemer.

Congratulations.

It rocks hard.
And so do you.

In other news...

I am starting to feel better. Thankee for all of the good vibes and love. Keith made me take today off too, which I think was probably smart, but I'm still getting lots done. (Heeeeeee!) Drinking lots of water and trying to just flush out whatever might be left in my system. OUT!

I've gone and created a Cricket Feet Mailing List , since I've been told that a few of the wonderful members of the Hollywood Happy Hour Yahoo Group really only stay subscribed so that they can keep up with announcements I might have about the industry, notes about upcoming column topics at Showfax.com, information about upcoming networking events, details on screenings of films I've cast, book signings, and various speaking engagements around the country.

Volume of mail should be relatively light. I'm thinking a weekly blurb about my column (I've been asked to do that, as a reminder when new articles are posted) and periodic announcements about events that I would normally either post at HHH or forward to Judy Kerr for her awesome mailing list.

Remember, Queen of Cactus Cove screening FREE on Thursday. You're coming, right?

Let's see... what else?

I've taken some quizzes. I'll post those results later.

I'm going to do some organizing now. I have a cool teenage helper coming over later this week (she's in town from NY for Pilot Season) to help with my headshots, scripts, and demo reels. Before that stage, though, I have to get stuff to a manageable level.

Okay, I think that's it for now.

Oh, one more: last night was seriously intense on the celeb factor at dinner. Very bizarre to see such a high concentration of industry folk at one time on one night. Dress rehearsal for upcoming Oscar parties? Maybe. Anyway, champagne and lobster always makes me smile. It was a good date. The Saturday industry "underground" thing was amazingly good fun too. *giggle*

Time for a shower. Yay!

Remember, embrace the YotL, yo.

Posted by bonnie at 2:20 PM | Comments (7)

February 12, 2006

Quick Hit

*Phew*

So, I've been stressing out all weekend about how on Earth I'm going to get everything done for my meeting tomorrow, what with another meeting today--one that's going to take a big chunk out of my day and therefore my ability to get prepped for tomorrow's meeting--and a column due.

Then, in the style of something CoCo wrote about last month, this morning brought a cancellation for tonight's dinner meeting. Awesome.

Not that I didn't want the meeting to happen--we've actually been working to schedule this for MONTHS--but the timing will be better later. Today, I shall write my column and prep for tomorrow's casting meeting. Phew! That's plenty of work, believe me!

Posted by bonnie at 1:20 PM | Comments (1)

February 9, 2006

Y'know what makes me happy?

A last-minute "let's see if we could actually attempt to get together" get-together with two of my favorite people on the planet.

That'd be Shon and Jodi. *giggle* I'm so excited! We're going to plan the big "Every Boy Is Turning 40" party. Eeeeeee! Yay! And, heck, we're just going to hang out and catch up. Wheeeeeee! Yay!

Back to work.

Posted by bonnie at 5:07 PM | Comments (2)

February 7, 2006

Updatey

I'm taking a moment to get out of the sun that shines on my "work seat" during this time of day and, from the floor, share some long-overdue updates. It only makes me more giddy that the actor I want THE MOST for one of the roles in HILMMAKS is on TV right now! Hee! It's a sign!

Okay, so the updates.

First, Pamela Newlands (AKA Sassy McLassie, and a contributor to SMFA2) shared this goodie with me. It's an interview with her that ran in the East Kilbride News (and that was subsequently picked up by the wire and run throughout the UK) in which she pimped out my new book.

Click to see the way-large version.

And if that's too large for you, just click here to see the "all about Bon" part of the piece. *giggle*

Oh, and so it doesn't get buried in comments, I'll share a share from super proofer Julie-O (who has scored a righteous gig recently--ask her about it) a link to Swingline Tot50 staples, though you'd better buy in bulk, with that $8 flat shipping fee. Thanks, Julie-O! Happy stapling, proofers!

Okay, so, for the other giddy, giggle-filled info that I can't technically share with the world yet. Remember that post in which everyone tried to guess stuff about the starfucking namedropping I did? Okay, well, I can't say what, but I can add some names to the collection. Oh, but maybe that's too much. I know! I'll be a link-sharer instead of a name-dropper. How's that? Kiki, does that make me a starlinker instead? Hmm.

Okay, so the links for my *giggle* start here: here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here. Yes, I've woven in non-names with names, plus earlier-posted names with new ones... just to make it fun. And because everyone loves a good
boost in the starmeter ratings, click this and this too. *giggle*

PS: the word of the day (per this post) is OKAY.

PPS: not telling, Ed. But it's not what you think it is. I'll tell you later. No one knows. Really. Honest.

~2 d, 23 h

Posted by bonnie at 4:52 PM | Comments (5)

January 31, 2006

Quick Hello

Hiya! Been awhile. Busy. Office is looking gorgeous (photos to come) especially thanks to a stunning new lampshade with crystals hanging from it (beautiful present from the Lindsays). New fax machine "system" is really cool. Next, we're going to put up a stunning curtain to divide the "office" and "living" spaces. Oh, and I'm going to finally get a desk. (Did you know that you can't buy a desk like I want anywhere in person in Southern California?? Yeah. Gotta go online. Drat.)

Meeting tomorrow with Gary about a new joint venture with a major trade publication. Eeeeee! I'm quite giddy. Also finally got paperwork done for another casting gig, which means I'll be releasing some info in an official capacity soon (on several projects at once). I'm just blown away that it's already almost February. Wow.

Oh, man, I haven't even mentioned the fact that the second edition of Self-Management for Actors reaches our warehouse TOMORROW! Ack! I so kept thinking I had more time to prep--and now it's almost here???? Ack! I had a dream that it was a huge bomb and no one bought it and I cried and cried. And then I went over to Deb's house and slept on a leather couch, took drugs in my sleep, and woke up with Christmas lights strung all over me. When I woke up, I was craving a Sloppy Joe. Do you think that's normal?

;)

More catch up later. I need a shower.

Posted by bonnie at 12:59 AM | Comments (4)

January 29, 2006

HB to MMSM

Yes, it's another birthday. But this one is extra-special. Today is the day my musical soulmate was born.

His name is John and we've never met in person, but he lets me call him Leemsy and we share excellent (near god-like) taste in music. He wrote about how "all of us" intersected in a recent blog entry, to which I'd add that it's also through this little online connection that I met my hubby, who endures and even enjoys how much love I have for my musical soulmate.

He is also glad Texas is not closer.

Happy birthday, Leemsy! You are greatness.

Posted by bonnie at 12:04 PM | Comments (4)

January 28, 2006

Happy Birthday, Everybody

There are two days of the year on which the MOST people I know were born. One of them is 1/28. The other is 9/11. Seriously. Eight of my good friends share today as a birthday. Six friends share 9/11 (with another five sharing 9/12). Wow. Lots of numerological karma, having this many friends with the same b'day, wouldn't you say?

Okay, so happy birthday to all of you! Wish I could play with everyone.

Now, on to the tagging I got from the greatness that is Nini.

While I have a list of "Little Known Facts at the bonsite (which was way fun to go back through, since I created the list in 1997 and have only updated it a few times since), I still am having trouble coming up with My Five Weirdest Habits, which is what Nini has challenged me to do. I mean, how many of my "things" are habits and how many are OCD rituals? Well... I'll do my best.

1. I am incapable of turning a volume that is measured in numbers up or down to any increment other than five or zero. If my car stereo's volume is on 38, I know Keith was driving last, as I can only have it on 35 or 40. Period.

2. I rewrite lists. This is actually how my OCD was first suspected (by a teacher in high school). I was rewriting a list in Spanish class and my teacher sat me down for a heart-to-heart about rituals and habits and phobias. It was quite revealing. I still rewrite my lists, but not as often as I used to, since the SixHundy takes care of most of my list-making anymore.

3.

4. I cannot make a list with item number three included. Blame somesuch. It is said the "There Is NEVER a Three" rule came from the mis-remembering of a Monty Python sketch, but I've never watched Monty Python, so I can't say for sure. Whether it was supposed to be number six or number three or whatever, it has stuck as number three with my group of online friends, and it is now something that I can't NOT do.

5. Doors must be left all the way open or all the way closed. Period. A door left "ajar" or open but not all the way up against the wall behind it is somehow offensive, out of order, going to cause me stress, or create chaos in my life in some way. Want to drive me crazy? Come over, open all of my cabinets, leave all doors half-open, and put your purse or backpack on the floor (bad feng shui). I will need a valium.

6. When I bowl (which I rarely do anymore), I sing (in my head), "Mary had a little lamb," as I approach the release line. I took bowling as a phys ed in college (woo hoo) and this was the tactic taught by our instructor. My average was around 120. I liked that class.

Next, a wonderful link that was shared by the greatness that is Tony on the 24th. Only wish I'd opened the email then. But how can you know there's brilliance in the inbox? It's like the time I let a phone message go unanswered and later learned I had been cast in the "Deadbeat Club" music video, but missed it, since I figured Eric was just calling to invite me to his party that weekend. Ugh. That's what you get, busy girl!

Posted by bonnie at 3:45 PM | Comments (5)

January 27, 2006

Bearded Lady

A recent comment-based exchange with my NBF Erik (who is doing a very My Name Is Earl-ish list-y thing that I totally love and about which I will blog later) reminded me of one of the jobs I was BEST at, in my teens and twenties.

I made a great beard.

It's kind of sad that straight gals growing up these days will no longer have the pleasure of being their gay best friends' prom date (or, if they DO have the pleasure, they won't be ever-hopeful, like we clueless '80s girls were, that perhaps somehow, someway, something romantic COULD come out of it all, if the DJ just played the EXACT RIGHT SONG as we danced on the shiny gym floor). Girls today will never get to be the "fake girlfriend" introduced to mom and dad, when the folks would come into town and want to meet their son's lady love. Today, everyone knows everyone is gay and there is just no need for the fake girlfriend anymore.

Sad, really. In the '80s, I was often faked out by my gay boyfriends. In the '90s, I was in on the fake-out of my gay boyfriends' families. In the 2000s, no one is being faked out and, in a way, that's just sad. There's a whole generation of creative, beautiful, wonderful young ladies out there who will never get to play make-believe at that level. I guess it's good that there's more good stuff on TV these days. But what on EARTH would I have done with all of that spare time, had I not been such a kick-ass beard for two decades? Man... I could've been president!

Ah, just as well. I treasure my memories of planning to have David's children while we were choreographing his dance number for the school cabaret, being sweetly serenaded by Gary on the ride home from drama/dance camp and believing that meant we were in love, helping John get dressed in drag while telling his girlfriend we were at a movie, and eventually being the opening act for the BoyButante Ball '95. Wouldn't trade having been a bearded lady for anything!

Posted by bonnie at 1:16 PM | Comments (1)

January 20, 2006

Okay, Levitz. It's ON!

Levitz sucks Levitz sucks Levitz sucks Levitz sucks and now they've taken all of the fun out of what was some of my most bliss-filled living of 2004: the whole Happy Sofa Day stuff.

How dare you tarnish Happy Sofa Day? I am traumatized.

Of course, it seems we're not the only ones burned by the corporate restructuring and lack of customer service provided by Levitz (sucks).

See, we bought the extended warranty on the sofa we bought in November 2004. In June 2005, we noticed a busted seam, in a location making it clear it was a weak seam to begin with, not a "we messed it up" thing, but either way, we bought the extended warranty for a reason, right? June 2005, we call out a service rep who inspects the damage, agrees it's under warranty, and tells us a replacement cushion cover will be shipped out that same day.

Fast forward to 20 January 2006. Keith has now called Levitz no less than five times in the past six months. He has spoken to CSRs, managers, shipping clerks, you name it. And they all have lied lied lied lied about the status of this cover. Today, finally, after Keith was lied to ("It shipped 12/31/05," [Funny, considering when he called on 1/3/06 he was told it hadn't shipped yet, due to a problem with the manufacturer--problem turns out to be the fact that LEVITZ HASN'T BEEN PAYING ITS BILLS and the manufacturer is not sending them a gawtdayum thing anymore.]), he asked to speak to a manager, who explained that, yes, that was a lie. It hadn't shipped. And it won't be shipping unless this new company that bought Levitz somehow gets back on good terms with the manufacturer--oh, and that's only if they REMEMBER to take care of those of us who've had open orders since June 2005.

Oh, quick question. Was the manufacturer shipping replacement covers for furniture under warranty in July? Yes. Where's ours? Oops. Okay, how about in August, when we called to find out where the cover, ordered in June, was? Oops. Okay, how about in October, when we called and were told the CSR was physically walking down to the shipping area to make sure the order was placed? Oops. How about in November, when we were told there'd been a shipping problem that had since been fixed and that our cover was on its way? Oops. How about in December when we were told it would ship on 1/2/06? Oops. How about on 1/3/06 when we were told it hadn't shipped? Oops. Y'all lie lie lie lie lie lie.

Can we come down to a showroom and take a cover off a floor model? No. The manufacturer has taken back its furniture at the few remaining Levitz (sucks) showrooms. Can we get our money back (even partial refund) on our furniture and the TOTALLY USELESS EXTENDED WARRANTY? No, don't be silly. Of course not. Can we request that we're notified if/when things work out, so that we'll know we have the replacement cover coming? Pff. Silly woman!

Is there anything we can do? Nope. We've filed a complaint with the BBB, but from the looks of the complaints at the My 3 Cents site, it won't do a bit of good. Seriously, our problem is NOTHING compared to some of the treatment others have received (and on furniture issues worth many more thousands of dollars than our little sofa) from Levitz sucks.

Welcome to doing business with bankrupt companies in the 2000s, people. It's the Wild West all over again. I'm going to start looting.

Posted by bonnie at 2:57 PM | Comments (5)

January 3, 2006

I'm Goin' In!

The amazing Christopher Grossett and the brilliant Laura Lock gave us a collection of cookbooks from our registry and I've decided to make a go of a lovely little recipe from Living In The Raw.

See, I don't cook. I burn water. So a raw recipe is much more likely to not suck (or at least more likely to not burn down the house) and I'm going to attempt Pasta Mexicana and Salsa. No pasta... that's just the name. I know. It's weird. Jicama = Pasta, in this case. But I've been wanting to eat raw for years and I'm pretty dang excited to try this.

If I don't post again for days, come rescue me. I'll be pinned beneath various green things, cutting boards, and mixing bowls... a wall filled with condiments heckling at my mangled body.

Posted by bonnie at 1:49 AM | Comments (1)

December 23, 2005

2005 in Questions

Another one that was such a hit layst year!

1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
Get married.
2. Did you keep your 2005 resolutions? Will you make more for 2006?
I make birthday resolutions, rather than Jan. 1 resolutions, so... n/a, really.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Bob and Erin.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Sue Ozeran, Eric Gelman, Joseph Montana.
5. What countries did you visit?
Just this one.
6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
Sense of peace with my physical existence. True forgiveness for having had my heart broken. Again.
7. What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory and why?
June 16th: Became a Mrs.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Goodness... all of it. Casting eight films and one play, writing two books, churning out a weekly column, building amazing new relationships, and (most importantly, probably), getting through it all... emotionally.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Holding onto any negativity for longer than a nanosecond, probably.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Blissfully, thrillingly migraine-free since going off gluten. Having my BIGGEST physical malady out of the way makes the little colds and being-slipped-drugs effects much less major. Still working on getting the panic attack/thyroid whatnot under control, but, as the title indicates, I am a work in progress.
11. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Mine. Many times over. I'd love to be able to say I celebrated the behavior of many people during the various crises our world faced this year, but I simply don't think it needs to TAKE things getting THAT BAD for us to be our best selves. I, personally, faced one of the biggest challenges of my life thus far and managed to come through it alive (which is huge) and with GRACE (which is a bonus).
12. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
W.
13. Where did most of your money go?
Printing two books.
14. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Copperwynd. Twice. Also my CSA application, but, eh... whatareyagonna do?
15. What song will always remind you of 2005?
"Seasons of Love" from RENT.
16. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
Same answer as last year. (And that's a quality problem, eh?) Far happier. And I was elated this time last year. Just keeps getting better and better.
b) thinner or fatter?
Same, methinks. While going off gluten IMMEDIATELY fixed my migraines and joint pain, the weight gain that came from 2004's reveal that gluten was killing me has not yet gone away. That said, I am WAY healthier than I was in 2004, and that's a huge YAY.
c) richer or poorer?
Far richer. And I was in good shape this time last year. See "A." Same answer as layst year, again.
17. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Get paid time off. I even worked on our honeymoon. Definitely would like some more paid time off (or better pay during the non-time off, which would allow for some (any) downtime).
18. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Stress out. Panic. Binge.
19. How will you be spending Christmas?
Same as always: Orphans' Christmas Dinner with tha gang. We rarely see each other outside of Christmas Dinner, but it's always a highlight of the year.
20. Did you fall in love in 2005?
I ALWAYS fall in love.
21. What was your favorite TV program?
Tie: Everybody Hates Chris and My Name Is Earl. Amazing rebirth of brilliant sitcom writing. Finally.
22. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Policy: I don't hate. I move on.
23. What was the best book you read?
Man, I read sooooo many books every year, it's always tough (unless it's a year like last year, when there's just a clear frontrunner), but I'd say this year's best was probably The Declaration of Independent Filmmaking by the Polish Brothers. I also loved/love the Postsecret book, of course!
24. What was your greatest musical discovery?
There is not one single song by ELO that doesn't fill me with glee. Seriously, try it. Follow that link and tell me if you don't smile.
25. What did you want and get?
More credibility as a casting director. Rewards for my good work, both monetarily and with repeat business.
26. What did you want and not get?
CSA membership. Physical peace.
27. What was your favorite film of this year?
That'd have to be Queen of Cactus Cove, of course, but I also really dug Rent, as feature films go.
28. What did you do on your birthday? How old were you?
Amazingly delicious lobster dinner with Keith and Brody at The Palm (where we discovered and fell in love with Ferrari Cerano Chardonnay) followed by zillions of drinks at Dan Tana's with (visiting) sister Deb and a whole mess of my dearest friends. Then a slumber party over here with same Deb, filled with laughter and catching up like only we can. 35.
29. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Unconditional self-love.
30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
Jeans. Dusters. The old reliable black tank.
31. What kept you sane?
Writing, friends, kitties, booze, kisses.
32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Javier Bardem, Idina Menzel.
33. What political issue stirred you the most?
See link in number 11.
34. Who did you miss?
My mother, as always.
35. Who was the best new person you met?
Brad Lemack, James Hong, Brenda Weiermair, Anna Christopher, Katharine McEwen, Jesse Luke Dunn, Shanna Collins, Joel Viertel, more I'm sure.
36. What valuable life lesson did you learn in 2005?
Learned through doing the photo/autobiography project "The Sum of All Years" (full postmortem in a week or so): Even the best times come with frustration and work. Even the worst times come with some of the most blissful, beautiful, hope-filled moments around.
37. What song lyrics sum up your year?
There is no future
There is no past
I live this moment as my last
There's only us
There's only this
Forget regret
Or life is yours to miss
No other road
No other way
No day but today.

Posted by bonnie at 5:17 PM | Comments (1)

The Year In Review

This was such a hit layst year, I'll be doing it again. Enjoy!

Take The First Line From The First Post Of Each Month Of 2004. That's Your Year In Review.

January 2005: Okay, so I was asleep by 11pm. Told Keith to wake me up at Midnight for a kiss, because they say whatever you're doing at the stroke of Midnight you'll be doing all year. That was fun, even though I was groggy.
February 2005: Extraordinarily Narcissistic. For the first time in what seems like YEARS, my fingernails are long and healthy.
March 2005: *contented sigh* Ever know for sure you made a GREAT decision the instant you (finally) made it?
April 2005: I turned off my computer 20 hours ago. I slept for six hours and here's what I did-slash-observed during the other 14. (Note: I did not get any phone calls returned. *sigh*)
May 2005: Freekin' Sweet! Unless you live under a rock, you've heard the news that Family Guy is back!
June 2005: Okay, so I've always had this theory (and it seems to pan out, according to most actors I've talked to) that if you get a parking ticket while you're at an audition, you will book the gig.
July 2005: Reasons I'm Sad/Reasons I'm Happy. 1. (Sad) Honestly, Luther (and one of the Tonies from Tony Toni Toné) was one of the best-smelling guys I ever worked for, back in my Left Bank Management days.
August 2005: So, a cool actor friend of mine came by today to drop off his taped audition for Teenage Dirtbag (he's in rehearsal tomorrow night and can't make it to the preread) and brought me a bag of organically grown goodies!
September 2005: Okay, so I did the big email inviting folks to the screening for The Moor and got replies back from the producers of several other films I've cast, sharing status updates. Yippee!
October 2005: And because you loved it... there's more.
November 2005: This is what happens when an HTML junkie begins to age... she can't fix code on a page she's been maintaining for over six years.
December 2005: Inked! A new casting gig. Woo hoo!

Posted by bonnie at 3:15 AM | Comments (0)

December 22, 2005

New Favorite Thing

It's actually not "new," seeing as I fell in love with it 16 May 2005 when we had a Breakdowns dinner at Il Moro and I had it for the first time. But, just the same, I am in love with the Insalata Garga del Moro. "I could eat about a million and a half of these," to quote Forrest Gump.

Ingredients: hearts of palm, tomato, avocado, watercress, pine nuts, and shaved parmesan cheese in a lemon and balsamic dressing. YUM! So happy to have it again tonight (at another Breakdowns dinner). Wish I'd had two.

Bracing myself for a packed social calendar (which started with tonight with Gary, Bob, Susan, Keith, and Mark, really): Bob & Erin's tomorrow for lunch, Kevan and Maria's for a party Friday, Adam & Deb's for a party Saturday, and Tracy & Dick's for the annual orphans' Christmas dinner. Hoping to drop by the open house gala(s) at Deb and Aleta's at some point, but no idea how we'll work that in. Note to self: buy wine to take everywhere, buy fixins for Keith's chocolate Dreamwhip pie, and prep kitties for lots of away time.

Posted by bonnie at 12:48 AM | Comments (0)

December 21, 2005

Perspective

From an email exchange w/ an actor friend who has taken Hollywood by storm in a very short period of time.

She: Love the new cricketfeet site by the way, this town's been *really* good to you in 2005 as well!
Me: Thanks for the feedback on the site. It's amazing what casting eight films in a year, having three of those go on the festival circuit, one of those win an award, and writing a couple of books will do. ;)

I shared that exchange with Keith this morning and he said, "And writing a weekly column. Don't forget about writing a weekly column." Yeah. So, lest we (feel tempted to) forget, it's a nice reminder that quite often it's kicking ass that yields a kick-ass year.

Just sayin'.

Posted by bonnie at 5:10 PM | Comments (0)

December 20, 2005

Stuff

I really like this quote:

It's a sad day when you realize that you judge a person's worth by the frequency of their updates.

Awesome.

Really like browsing through this site, although I think getting the magazine would be too cluttery. Really trying to declutter.

Tonight... we finally discover the identity of The Carver. I've never been so happy to have the east coast feed!

Thwok, hunter that she is, found the bacon Keith had fried up (and left on paper-towel-covered plates on the counter) and dragged a piece to the living room for proper cleaning and eating. I hated to take it from her, but I just couldn't imagine that the resulting digestional issues would be pleasant.

That is all.

Posted by bonnie at 6:07 PM | Comments (1)

December 16, 2005

Synchronicity

There is something so beautiful about the way life works sometimes.

We make a casting decision late today on Still of the Night and I call the actor's agent. The voicemail has already been switched on, indicating the agency (one of the biggies) is closed until 4 January 2006. I don't HAVE to have this guy's contract locked today, but I sure as hell need him to know the offer has been made, get at least a verbal yes, and move forward in good faith with letting the non-cast actors' representatives know status.

I go to IMDB-Pro to look up this actor's manager info. Nope. Wrong info. Call the management company, whose employees have never heard of him... obviously outdated info. Fine. Call the attorney of record (for no reason other than to be SURE that someone, somewhere knows an offer is coming over). Leave a message with assistant.

Exhale. This may be as far as I can get with this deal this year.

Couple of hours later, phone rings... it's the attorney. I give him all of the info about the project, he says he'll do his best to get the info to his client, just so that we can know if he's even going to be available to do it (he's a series regular on a hot new show right now), we joke about how we're still busy at work at dark on the day when everyone in Hollywood left town at noon for the rest of the year. Hee hee, ho ho, good convo. Six minutes, tops.

One of the things he says, at the end of the conversation, is that he's very well-versed (surprisingly) in indie film deals, seeing as he reps a few producers and has built more than a few distribution deals, writer packaging, blah blah blah, and maybe we should get to know each other better.

Yes.

Let's do that. I tell him I'm just about to hit my three-year mark with casting, the next film I've got on my plate is a $2M feature film that I'm just really excited about, I'm movin' on up, yada yada, and it might be a good time for me to take a meeting at this level.

Why NOT have someone who is PAID (commission) to read scripts and negotiate my casting deals for me? Why NOT?!?

I'm sooooo in.

Oh, and a footnote... the owner of the big-deal agency that had been closed a few hours earlier just called me on his cell to give me a verbal yes on the deal, let me know how much his client loved auditioning for me and specifically for this project, and that we'll do the paperwork in the new year, "Tell Gary Marsh that I love him when you have dinner with him next week," and so on.

Life... she is goooooooooooooooood.

AND--Keith is on his way home with well-reviewed gluten-free pizza crust so that I can have something I've been craving (but finding unsatisfactory) for the year I've been gluten-free. Yippee! I just LOVE it when it all comes together! Thanks, universe! You rock!

Posted by bonnie at 5:59 PM | Comments (1)

December 15, 2005

My Review of RENT

is here.

Posted by bonnie at 9:29 PM | Comments (0)

December 12, 2005

So, why?

Okay, so I've been asked about The Sum of All Years project and how it is I've decided to (over) share so much. Well, I look at it this way.

I'm a public person. I'm out about my damage (after having not been for so many years). And there are people who live everyday lives and have walked the same trail of tears I have, when younger, and never feel they'll be enough. And maybe I can help. Maybe I can prove that you can have everything go wrong and still make it. Or that you can appear as though you've done everything right and still have a shadow self (and that there's nothing wrong with that). Heck, maybe it's all about giving me an excuse for my mid-life damage, airing all of the "back then" BS. I don't know! And maybe I don't have to know.

What I like about this project is that it's about an autobiography. That's why I can't leave anything out. Yes, you could wait 'til I'm dead and dig up my unshared writings and learn whose fingerprints have been on my life... or I could own it now and say, "And y'know what? I'm STILL OKAY."

Nothing wrong with that.

It may be totally narcissistic, but it could also be liberating to others. I'm human. I'm broken. And I still happen to do just fine, thank you.

Posted by bonnie at 7:47 PM | Comments (3)

Happy Casting Director

So, y'know I love to brag about the amazing casts I bring together for such GREAT films, right? Well... this one is different. Last night, I attended the World Premiere of Queen of Cactus Cove with the cast, crew, and our families.

And I cried.

Yes, I always cry when I see a film I've cast (and that's been four that have actually had public screenings thus far--another four not yet filmed, the other nine still in post), but this film was BEAUTIFUL. I am in awe of the cinamatography, the brilliant direction, perfect writing, and natural acting. Hell, to single elements out is unfair to the whole film--which is PERFECT. I was so giddy after the screening. I hugged the actors who turned out for the screening and gushed about how they made me look brilliant for casting them. Man... this is EXACTLY why I do this job.

And today I spoke with a friend/filmmaker/writer/actor who told me he is paying his casting director $10K to cast his film. Yeah. Y'know what... I'm going to start getting paid better in 2006. Starting up with HILMMAKS is a good launchpad. Man, the feedback on this script is amazing. I'm so happy to be casting it.

In other news, MCJ was here for a visit and it rocked. We had friends over for fun, drinks, games, and loads of gossip. And some emotions... Yeah. Did you know that when I drink I'm emotional? Oh, wait... did you know that when I breathe I'm emotional? Damn Cancer-the-Crab stuff. Oh well, in the company of good friends, it's all okay.

Okay, so I wasn't able to make the final casting offers as scheduled for Still of the Night, so I'll do those tomorrow (I hope). The book is at the printer, and that's a big sigh of relief. Keith is averaging about six national commercial auditions (and one callback) per week lately. It's just a matter of time. Rock on!

Posted by bonnie at 6:59 PM | Comments (0)

December 10, 2005

Yippee!

MCJ is on her way to LAX. Keith is on his way to pick her up. We're having people over this late afternoon/early evening, so if you're interested, call or email or comment here and we'll tell you when, where, and what to bring, if you're so inclined on the latter. ALETA IS BRINGING FUDGE!

Oh, and I had a dream last night in which I was a prostitute (yes, we're still trying to cast the prostitute role in Still of the Night) and my second customer was Danny DeVito. I took one of his condoms with me to the upfronts with cousin Faith and disposed of it after I got off the boat that delivered us from the screening of Faith's new show back to the press lodge.

Um... okay.

Oh! If you come over tonight, be prepared--our next door neighbor moved after Thanksgiving, so they've been fixing up her place for the newbies, and that means lots and lots of PAINT FUMES 'round here! Woo hoo!

Posted by bonnie at 10:15 AM | Comments (3)

December 7, 2005

Highlights for Music Junkies

I've been working on this over at the blog of my musical soulmate, Leemsy. Don't read our answers there (in his comments section) until you've looked it over on your own and come up with a few of the bands depicted in the image below (click to enlarge significantly).

There are 75 bands. Which ones can you name? It's like that Highlights magazine that was always in the doctor's office waiting room... but cooler.

Okay, a couple more TSOAY (thanks for the acronym, Hal) folks these days. Yay! (See what you've started, Cliff?) And, like BrYan, I'll be doing a post-mortem, but I must say it's definitely easier, once you make it past the first scary entry. To wit, my second scary entry was a piece of cake to write when compared to the anxiety I felt over writing the first. Go say hi to Julie-O, who joins me, Chip, BrYan, Hal, and the original TSOAY-er, Cliff.

Anyone else planning to test the waters?

Posted by bonnie at 12:23 AM | Comments (3)

December 6, 2005

Strange Behavior

People are... strange.

Keith and I went for a walk and early dinner, then a walk back home. It was probably before 6pm and I'd guess it was around 58 degrees out (seeing as it's only NOW dipped to 50, and it's like 3am). I wore a sweater. Keith wore a pullover fleece hoodie thing. I wore sandals. We ate on the patio (they had heaters out).

Okay, but we watched these people coming into the restaurant through the patio for like an hour and a half, each dressed in suede coats with fur collars, wrapped in scarves, wearing gloves and hats... the works. It's like they KNOW this is the only chance they'll have to show off their cute winter clothes, so they pretend it's actually colder than it is.

When a former childstar (Chip, that link's for you, since you'll love this one) came in to meet with us last week, he was wearing a heavy suede jacket, wool scarf (which remained around his neck during the meeting), and a thick cable-knit turtle-neck sweater. I think the low that day was like 60.

I just don't get it. Do people in Wisconsin wear shorts when it hits 70 (or do they go around in their bikini tops)?

Odd.

Posted by bonnie at 3:04 AM | Comments (4)

November 29, 2005

Oh, and...

Happy birthday, Liz!!

WE LOVE YOU!!!!!!!

Posted by bonnie at 10:23 PM | Comments (0)

One of these days...

I shall take some downtime.

No, really.

Posted by bonnie at 1:27 AM | Comments (1)

November 15, 2005

How To Fix a Sucky Mood

Step one: Go to bed way early and sleep as long as possible before you have to get up to start your exhaustingly long day.

Step two: Check email before dashing out the door and read all of the awesome, brilliant, loving, funny, and supportive comments left at your blog from when you bitched about being rubbed the wrong way so much you feel like a new hooker's practice dildo.

Step three:

Step four: Baby-talk kitties and have them show bellies off as if to say, "If you wanted to stay home all day and play with us, that would be okay too."

Step five: Ask hubby to print out directions to the two locations for the day's casting activities and don't notice 'til you're in the car that he used the little memo field that MapQuest provides to type love-notes.

Step six: Drive your kick-ass sixteen-year-old car really fast and zippy-like, showing all of the SUVs and Beemers how the twists and turns on Sunset west of The 405 are *really* done.

Step seven: Find a run of like five great songs in a row on various morning radio stations, all worth singing along to. Loudly.

Step eight: Have a good day of casting in which everything runs (mostly) without a hitch and after which your taste is praised and all of the BS that looked like it might go another way has washed down the RIGHT pipe after all.

Step nine: Stop by Whole Foods on the way home and pick up a salmon steak and grilled asparagus for $10.

Step ten: Blog it all up while digitizing and uploading video files of the day's sessions (and sipping a really neat little wine you found before leaving the store).

There you have it! Blood no longer boiling (for now... ). Gotta love those emotional roller coasters. Good thing to know they continue well into your 30s and sometimes it's just a matter of having a few big ol' sucky days.

Followed by a great one.

Cheers!

Posted by bonnie at 8:17 PM | Comments (4)

November 14, 2005

Um, hi... yeah.

Remember me?

Well, you're lucky. I sure as hell don't!

Didja ever notice there are certain people who just really rub you the wrong way?

Do you sometimes notice there are more-than-the-average-number of people rubbing you the wrong way for a bunch of days in a row?

And do you begin to wonder if maybe it's you who is turned the wrong way, which is why all of the rubbing FEELS like it's going on in the wrong direction?

And then do you think, "Hey! Who are you and why are you rubbing me?!?"

Dammit. I should really be liking all of this manhandling a LOT more.

Ugh.

Stop bothering me, people. And if it's ME and not YOU... then dangit, Bon, STOP BEING SO BOTHERED! Really. This is getting way old.

Posted by bonnie at 7:18 PM | Comments (6)

November 12, 2005

Here's What's Funny to Me

(and, yes, this has something to do with my upbringing and personal connection to numerology and astrology):

Personal Year 8: Attainment and capital gains
2006 is a number 8 personal year for you. This is your power year, a period when you can make important strides in you life. Coming after a very slow and introspective period (the personal year 7), you may start feeling some stirrings of ambitions. This is a year of big decisions and major achievements. Activity is your keynote now, and you will find yourself very much involved and occupied. Opportunities for advancement and recognition for past and current work is likely to come about during this year. You have things going for you so long as you take advantage and act. It is easy for you to branch out and expand in a businesslike manner. If you are at all inclined, this is the time to exude self-confidence and authority, because others will tend to be receptive to your leadership and control. Your power and status potential is at a peak of the nine years personal epicycle that concludes at the end of the next year.

So, what's the funny?

That'd be the idea that 2005 was "slow and introspective" for me. Certainly, I learned a buttload about who I am in 2005--but really, when do I NOT learn a buttload about who I am? And we're thinking 2006 will be when I have "advancement and recognition" for my work? Wow. That's just effin' rockstar launching upward, IMO.

I was emailing with someone recently and said (re: my value-added service of casting sessions being uploaded to the Cricket Feet server within 12 hours of preread sessions for producers in other cities to evaluate in near-real time), "I went from having cast 12 projects in two years to casting another six in four months, so it's definitely making me a more efficient casting director."

But man, it's a buttload of work. Point is, if we're launching into my POWER year, per numerology... well... should be interesting.

Okay, and... I've been casting my ass off this week. In case you didn't believe me when I mentioned I'd be scarce... well, I've been BUSY! And happily so. I have so many more favorite actors added to my short list.

Finally, I've been asked to "leak" the script for the next feature film I'm casting. This is a seriously wonderful script and the budget is over $2M, so I'm feeling pretty dang happy to be onboard. The goal, in the, "Hey, Bon, leak the script," idea is that folks will begin spreading the word and the pitches will begin before the breakdown goes out. Hey, have you ever doubted that Hollywood is a system? Just wonderin'. Heh heh.

BTW, there's something really really really rockstar fun about having a regular (regular = on a schedule, set your watch by it) call from the "big" agencies to check status. I swear, I don't want to be a star-f**ker and act like that stuff matters, but I've gotta say that level of interaction makes paying the bills a way innovative and different type of endeavor (puns intended).

Posted by bonnie at 1:50 AM | Comments (1)

November 2, 2005

So Proud of Myself

I'm seriously proud of myself. Starting at 6:30pm PST yesterday, I began my 24 hours of documentation of "A Day in the Life of Bon" per instructions at Chip's blog.

I remember the results of this challenge (which I did not take on) in February 2003 to be quite delightful and insightful. So, this time, I took it on. And I did gooooood. I took photos of my work, my kitties, my Keith, my phone calls, my headshot files, my cantaloupe-eating, and even my looking for grey hairs in the mirror-ing.

And now it's time to upload.

Guess what.

The card reader for my digital camera doesn't work on *any* version of OSX. Since I got the Chicklet in early 2003, we've been uploading photos using Keith's ancient ThinkPad and then FTPing them to me for sharing from there. That ThinkPad (Stinky) officially died a few weeks ago after a bout with chronic fried-insides-itis. Had I mentioned that? Yeah. So, Keith's on the Chicklet, I'm on the as-yet-unnamed gift from Joseph Montana, and no one can upload photos from the hand-me-down digital camera my dad and SM gave me in December of 2000.

Oh well. My photos were really good. I promise! And I was so damn proud to have finished the assignment, ready to upload, crop, and caption while watching ANTM. Grr. Suckola. Chip, I know you mentioned we could send you the photos for hosting. Does that mean I can snail mail you my 16mb media card for a six-year-old Olympus 1.3mpxl camera?

*snork*

I crack myself up.

Back to casting.

PS--Ask me to tell you all someday (in person, no papertrail) the things I've learned in casting this particular film re: submissions and pitch calls. Quite ethnographically titillating.

Posted by bonnie at 7:53 PM | Comments (0)

November 1, 2005

Losing My Touch

This is what happens when an HTML junkie begins to age...

She can't fix code on a page she's been maintaining for over six years. Yup. Something went wonky and I can't fix it. Can't. Don't even have the right headspace for the analysis. I usually can line up an old version of the code and a new version and find exactly where something went wrong and put it back in order. Or AT LEAST I can pull one of Keith's old Java Script books down and figure it out from there. This time? No way.

I'm officially getting too old to code.

Wow.

Meanwhile, still finishing edits on the book and still having a LOT more to do than I'd imagined I would, this close to Mercury going Retrograde. Looks like a new breakdown will go out this week for the first of three films to cast before year-end. And what I really need is some paid time off to get everything organized so that I can actually do all of the things stretched out before me and hire someone to help.

Oh, y'know what hurts? Microwave popcorn bag-induced papercut on the pinky. Yeah. Ow.

Happy November, all!

Posted by bonnie at 2:36 AM | Comments (3)

October 28, 2005

One of those days.

Y'ever have one of those days? You know the kind.

Birds are singing, sun is shining, you're well fed, in love, and have received so much praise for doing good work that you have the glow of happiness all around you--just ready to hug you with the realization that you truly have the most AMAZING life...

and you couldn't be more miserable?

Yeah. I'm having one of those days.

It sucks.

Click to enlarge.

Happily, though, I did receive the poster art for Queen of Cactus Cove, which is simply gorgeous. I'll share that, as maybe sharing something beautiful will improve my mood. I mean, if getting an offer to cast yet ANOTHER (yes, that's three) low/mid-budget feature film, learning I'm personally responsible for a talented Scotish actor's move to Hollywood to follow her dreams, and reaching the final-edits stage on the book isn't enough to make me happy, maybe at least the soothing blue poster will help.

Ugh.

Somedays, it's like you can't catch a break, what with having EVERYTHING going for you and all.

Yes, I'm really really really really really going to try and remember this: Even when life rocks, there's "down." It doesn't mean a damn thing and you might as well enjoy the low spots, since they come no matter how much life rocks. Blah blah blah blah blah. Self-indulgent bullshit. Blah blah blah blah blah.

Posted by bonnie at 5:18 PM | Comments (1)

October 20, 2005

Okay, so...

...because I love my sister* (and she says I don't blog enough lately), I am sharing this.

Click to see large.

*tsk* *tsk*

(Not sure where that came from. Email?)

*=she's not my sister, she's my heavy. Oh, wait... that's not right either. Well, either way... she said I don't blog enough... so, here!

Having been totally inspired by Rob's blog on the subject, I went old school and Gizoogled myself. Here's what came of it: long bio, short bio, imdbo (all PDFs, all funny).

Oh, and just b/c it's funny...

(That one came from the greatness that is BrYan.)

PS--SAG CAP rocked. Loved the actors. 95% amazing. Casting for Two Dogs Inside is rocking hard. Shrinks is doing a half-off weekend, if you use code 008 at this link (and you should). Finally, our top-secret wedding reception is Sunday, 2pm. We're in charge of the hooch, which means you will be well-plied. So come. ¡Por favor!

Posted by bonnie at 11:18 PM | Comments (2)

October 18, 2005

888

SpyNotebook's control panel tells me this is entry number 888. Cool.

I have so much to say but no time to blog, seeing as I am still behind my list of things that MUSTGETDONE before I can safely say I'm ready for my loooooooong day tomorrow.

Prereads for Two Dogs Inside tomorrow at waytooearly ayem. I'm so excited about this project!

After prereads, I'm off to SAG for the Casting Access Project. That'll be fun. I've spent the past couple of hours matching up headshots with appropriate sides for the cold read night.

Oh, and I'm crazy in love with TV lately. This is such a good Fall Season and I'm really happy to have so many shows I enjoy on while I finish the edits on the book.

Started watching Commander In Chief to support Jasmine Jessica Anthony, and I've stayed around, loving the whole dang show.

Watching Everybody Hates Chris and loving how much it's like my childhood (being the outcast in the school, being the poorest in the neighborhood, y'know... being voiced by Chris Rock as I go about my day). This is seriously the BEST new show of the year.

A very close second is My Name Is Earl, another for-a-friend tune-in for which I've stuck around. Good news is Deb Cresswell's character may be coming back soon. Woo hoo!

Started watching Surface for a back-home friend, Louanne Cooper, who's getting some great camera time lately. Again, fell in love with the show and there you have it (of course, I can't tell Keith about my secret crush on the brothers Pate).

Not a new show, but one I'm so addicted to that I could watch it non non non non stop: Nip/Tuck. That's another friend-involved-so-watch-it thing that turned into a love affair. I am so dang proud of Greer Shephard for having such amazing taste--oh and is Bruno Campos sooooo the Carver? Duh!

Okay, I'll come back later and put links together for this entry, so that the blog actually does its job, tracking back to the right places. No time for love, Dr. Jones. I'm still miles away from that shower and nap I've been promising myself. Oh, and I haven't read most blogs lately, so if anyone's doing anything exciting and I should know about it... well... I will. Later. Promise. Have I mentioned how much I love love love both of the scripts I've been sent by filmmakers I met at the LA International Short Film Festival? I seriously have some amazing projects coming up. Man, that's cool! Okay, for real... bye!

Posted by bonnie at 11:56 PM | Comments (1)

So Easily Amused

Thwok has a new favorite toy.

Packing peanuts.

See, Keith went to our distributor's warehouse today and picked up a box of "damaged returns" (which is silly, b/c they aren't really *damaged* as much as smudged or handled in some way that makes them no longer "sell as new" material), in case we'd like to use the books for giveaways or whatever.

Box has assorted packing peanuts in it, and just enough of a hole in the top for the silver munkey to snake her paw inside and pull out said peanuts and play, play, play, play, play.

I am amused at how she is amused. The elder kitties are just so glad the thunder has stopped. They did not like that. I, on the other hand, LOVED IT, especially when it was so loud (just before the rain began) that the entire schoolyard filled with children across the street erupted in high-pitched screams of terror and excitement. Hee hee hee.

So easily amused.

PS--next entry will be my 888th at SpyNotebook.org. Cool, eh?

Posted by bonnie at 3:35 AM | Comments (0)

October 17, 2005

Two Things

1. Email woes are over. Woo damn hoo! (PS--They're over b/c Keith talked the stupid tech guys THROUGH their system to find the problem. Sheesh!)

2. Happy birthday, Def Jam Becca MC! You rock, celebrity girl! So glad I know you! Remember, tell that hubby to turn OFF the Effin' Fox News and treat you right. ;)

Posted by bonnie at 6:43 PM | Comments (1)

September 28, 2005

I Must Be Feeling Better!

Because I'm doing the rounds (reading blogs) and stealing from brilliant people like London Cliff.

That's a good sign.

Five Things I Can And Can't Do (Cliff's answers are way better than mine.)

Five Things I Should Know How To Do And Can't
1. cook (I burn water)
2. play guitar
3.
4. whistle
5. speak the three foreign languages I learned in school
6. say "particularly" correctly

Five Things I Shouldn't Know How To Do But Can
1. write with both hands
2. advanced algebra, geometry, trigonometry
3.
4. hit bullseye, every time
5. spot and name every actor I've ever auditioned, when I see him or her on TV in something else
6. full-on background check on anyone without any significant information (SS#, address history, etc.)

Fun, no? ;)

Fun poll results (yeah, I 86'd the poll after getting a whopping 22 votes).

BonBlogs Poll!
Why do you read BonBlogs?
To keep up with your whatnots. 45% 10
To see if you're casting something new. 5% 1
THERE IS NO THREE, EVER! 14% 3
Eh, it's bookmarked. What the Hell? 5% 1
I'm secretly stalking you. 18% 4
You're stalking me and I want to know why. 0% 0
Long-time reader, first-time interacter. 14% 3
Google led me here and I stuck around. No idea why! 0% 0

Reactions to come later. ;)

Posted by bonnie at 5:42 PM

September 27, 2005

Okay, so...

MCJ (aka... My Cousin Joni) is going to be in the El Lay for about 12 hours and I'm hoping to organize a social something.

Come to El Cholo (11th and Wilshire in Santa Monica) on Saturday, October 1st, between 4pm and 7pm to connect with me and MCJ before she has to head back out to the east coast.

It'll be fun and way low-key. Come with! Yeah!

Posted by bonnie at 11:54 PM

September 23, 2005

IGAR

I seriously have nothing to say.

Still sick. Trying to work on the book's revisions between big sleeps. Watching TV. Being bored.

Octoberfair is back (across the street) and that makes me smile.

Keith is auditioning for a "Disney Dad"-type role (heavy on the goofball). HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LISA! More more more DayQuil... and still, I got a rock!

Posted by bonnie at 1:14 PM

September 20, 2005

So Thrilled!

Seriously, I know it's odd, but I am THRILLED to be so so so sick.

Fever, sinus crud, can't swallow, throat on fire... THIS is stuff I can understand! AND I LOVE IT! Soooooo much better than the mystery that is baffling brain chemistry!

Oh, and in reviewing my post about us being hitched, I realize I shared some good details with friends elsewhere that readers of the BonBlogs might like to see. So, follow this link and weed through the congrats posts to get some of the inside info. ;)

Back to bed. Ahhhhh... it feels so good to be sick!

Posted by bonnie at 1:38 PM

September 4, 2005

Sunday Morning Search Party

Haven't done a search party in awhile, and I'm already ahead of myself in my To Do List this weekend (amazing), so let's have some fun and analyze the words and phrases that brought people here recently.

One on One: Camille Mana: of course! My friend Camille (from Wolfesden days and in Acting Qs) is a series regular now! Woo damn hoo!

Trashelle funny: yes, yes she is. Often in the way that Tara Reid funny or Anna Nicole Smith funny. Although, I must say that Katie out-Trashelled Trashelle last week on Kill Reality. Man, that show was such a great idea!

Bonnie pink: I like that one!

Blake Robbins: The OC: yes, my writing partner booked a recurring character on The OC but I can't tell you what he does. Just know, if you've seen him on everyothershowlately you know what his characters always do. *evil grin*

Tru-Fan Eliza: I think I got on their radar from casting the amazing Shawn Reaves as Kliner in Chandler Hall, but there has been so much turnover in that cast that I'm afraid to ask if he's been shooting lately.

Scout Taylor-Compton MISSING: yeah, a big spike in traffic over that one, as it seemed my blog was the only thing leading people to info, early on in her missing days, before the family went public. What's odd is that my blog drew the attention of (and led to phone calls from) the media... and lots of it. When the NY Daily News calls... well... it's just a little surreal.

girls upset tummy: aww. I have no advice for such. I got some advice for mine, but little of it was gluten-free, and I'd settle for an upset tummy over a migraine any day!

that hot dress: well, if it's one I've had on my bod, it MUST be this one. I mean... come ON! Hot, yo?

Kathy Griffin: ew! Don't look here for her (well, except above, I guess). Deb, I think I thought of someone who elicits in me the Renée Zellweger response you have. It's Kathy "Botox" Griffin. *shudder* (Oh, and upon looking over RZ's IMDB, I have actually seen FOUR movies she was in, but in two of them, she only had one forgettable scene each, so yeah, I guess I really only have seen two of HER movies. Ironic to see the most recent title, considering our Friday night experience.)

Definition: Work In Progress: that's me, baby. That's me.

PS--My nails are so long that I can't type without fat-fingering everything lately. Gluten-free eating has proven sooooo healthy for me. Love it!

PSS--My confidentiality and non-disclosure agreement with FOX is still in place from my Paradise Hotel days, so I can't say much, but OMG are the producers LYING in their interviews during Paradise Hotel Revealed on the FOX Reality Channel. Holy bejeebus, are they lying their arses off!! I'll tell you specifically where around May 2006, when I won't get sued for doing so.

Posted by bonnie at 1:52 AM

September 3, 2005

Others Say It Better

There is little to say about the state of natural disaster and speed of government response (vs. fictional WMDs and speed of government knee-jerk) that hasn't been said better* elsewhere. So, I'll just share some sillies.

Build your own church sign (thanks to CoCo, with whom I had an excellent tea date yesterday).

Visit a clever Cooking Monkey (hee hee... munkey), also thanks to CoCo (*she's also one of the ones saying it better).

And cast your votes in the Kitten War, which is simply a rockin' good waste of time, thanks to Ames' link to Cats In Sinks last week.

As for any tales about my brother's visit, those have been shared privately with those who experienced it and today is an official Day of Silence in the Gillespie-Johnson household in an attempt to recover. Thank you to those who joined in the Gas Light karaoke-fest last night. I think, when my brother screamed, "Bitch!" at the top of his lungs at me during my rendition of Piece of My Heart, he meant it as a compliment. *sigh* I am so less broken than I sometimes think I might be. Focusing on the positive, I will just say thank you to the universe for the reminder.

Glad August is over. Glad it's cooler. Glad we raised a buttload of money to send to the Red Cross last night. Glad my brother didn't pee in my wastebasket (thanks again, Keith... for everything).

Yes, the SpyNotebook's Google ads are broken.

Silence is good. Go click on kittens. I know I will.

Posted by bonnie at 6:35 PM

August 25, 2005

Forgiveness

For the latest on Scout Taylor-Compton, click the banner below.

In other news...

Something Keith is really good at is forgiveness. He's also an expert at the practice of unconditional love.

Me? I suck at both. I am very bad at forgiving (especially myself) and my love is almost always conditional. I demand perfection from myself and those around me, I am not a tolerant person, and I always feel as though I must punish myself for extended periods of time when I behave in any less-than-perfect way toward others.

I am pledging to learn from Keith (as he so frequently learns from me, with grace and gratitude) that the BEST gift for someone you've hurt is total forgiveness and that NO ONE is served by extended periods of self-loathing. He loves to say that what makes us BEAUTIFUL, as humans, is our imperfections. I say that we are sometimes beautiful DESPITE our imperfections.

I have a lot to learn. Hm. I guess that makes me one really beautiful human being then, eh?

*sigh*

I remain... a work in progress.

Posted by bonnie at 5:06 AM

August 22, 2005

Ow.

Latest Scout Taylor-Compton post linked here.

So, I've been sick (in bed sick) since Wednesday night. Finally started feeling better Saturday evening, but then my lower back started aching as though I'd pulled, pinched, or otherwise wrenched something.

How, when I've been in bed for days, I do not know.

I tried to "get a good night's sleep" by getting in bed before midnight, knowing I've a big, bad casting day ahead of me for Teenage Dirtbag with producers. Can't sleep. Up and down to the bathroom. Flip-flopping with back pain. Fever in my back. Am I having kidney issues? Am I so stressed out about Scout and casting and a zillion other things that I'm psychosomatizing stuff?

Whatever it is... I'm up. God help me get through seven hours of casting and meetings that follow. Seems so silly a wish compared to, "get Scout home safe."

*sigh*

Posted by bonnie at 3:44 AM

August 15, 2005

Hey. Busy.

Did I share this with y'all yet?

Click to see the Wal*Mart page.

And, it seems that my friend Brad sees this in my future:

Hee hee.

Still editing tape for Teenage Dirtbag producers to watch online in Idaho. Callbacks next week. I'm exhausted. Very busy week, here.

PS--Quite enjoying watching Paradise Hotel (and the post-show interviews) on Fox Reality Channel. What a flashback to my life of May 2003!

PPS--Oh, Greer, I tried to watch your new show but I just can't get past Kyra's bad accent.

Posted by bonnie at 7:31 PM

August 13, 2005

Me in 100 Things

Grabbed from Nini (and it really reminds me of the Go-Go's Girl of a Hundred Lists, which was always a favorite song even before I realized it was pretty much an ode to my OCD).

01 First grade teacher's name: N/A (never went to K, 1st, or 2nd grade--fun fact).

02 Last word you said: "G'nite."

03 Last song you sang: Can't Help Lovin' That Man of Mine.

04 Last person you hugged: Keith Johnson, of course!

05 Last thing you laughed at: Something on Will & Grace (a Jack line, I'm sure).

06 Last time you said "I don't remember:" Sheesh! I don't remember.

07 Last time you cried watching TV: Tonight at the gym, during the reairing of the World Trade Center towers falling as they did a news story on the release of the 9/11 tapes.

08 What color socks are you wearing? None.

09 What's under your bed? Nothing (it's bad feng shui).

10 What time did you wake up today? Hmm... something like 7am when the phone started ringing.

11 Current taste: Grapefruit juice.

12 Current hair: Red, long, in need of a rinse and trim, wet and piled on top of my head right now, post-shower.

13 Current annoyance: Lack of free time available to do stuff like purge old headshots, organize scripts, return demo reels, and begin work on my next book.

14 Current longing: Hm. Can't come up with anything.

15 Current desktop background: Cool red/yellow swirl thingy from the Mac OS abstract image files.

16 Current worry: That Thwok is not 100% healthy.

17 Current hate: No hate. Ever.

18 Current favorite article of clothing: The Gap shorts I've worn out (and the Tweeds sandals I've broken).

19 Favorite physical feature of the preferred sex: Eyes.

20 Last CD that you listened to: Mix CD from Mike at Roxbury (it's called "La Bonita's 31st Birthday Mix," I think).

21 Favorite place to be: Home.

22 Least favorite place: In traffic.

23 Time you wake up in the morning: Never the same time.

24 If you could play an instrument, what would it be? I'd love to be really good at piano.

25 Favorite color: Silver.

26 Do you believe in an afterlife? Absolutely! That question James Lipton asks about what you want God to say to you when you get to heaven... my answer is: "Welcome back! Ready to go again?"

27 How tall are you? 5'7" (but I'm often accused of being 5'9"--it's the boobs).

28 Current favorite word/saying: "My pleasure!" (I've been hearing myself say this on the phone to agents and managers all week long.)

29 Favorite book: Lovingly, Georgia (although Excuse Me, Your Life Is Waiting is right up there too.

30 Favorite season: Fall (and, really, it's October in Boston).

31 One person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to: Probably Mom.

32 Where do you want to go for university? Been... several times. If I go back to finish my PhD, it'll probably be at UCLA.

33 What is your career going to be like? Already is... flexible, creative, intense, social, and very fun.

34 How many kids do you want? Maybe one.

35 Said "I love you" and meant it? Every time.

36 Gotten in a fight with your dog/cat/bird/fish? No.

37 Been to New York? Of course!

38 Been to Florida? Of course!

39 Been to California? Present day!

40 Been to Hawaii? God, yes. LOVED it. Can't wait to go back.

41 Been to Mexico? Never.

42 Been to China? Nope.

43 Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day? Of course!

44 Do you have a crush on someone? Of course!

45 What book are you reading now? Self-Management for Actors (for revision purposes... BTW... that's a REALLY good book).

46 Worst feeling in the world? Being misunderstood.

47 What is the last thing you think about when you go to bed at night? What all I have to do starting when I'm next awake.

48 What is the first thing you think about when you wake in the morning? Kisses.

49 How many rings before you answer? When I'm working and expecting calls, I'll pick up on the first ring. When I'm not in the "expecting calls" stage, I *never* pick up. Ever. Hate, hate, hate the phone (oh, so I guess there *is* something I hate, for that one above).

50 Future daughter's name: Grace.

51 Future son's name: Walker.

52 Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? Does Archie count?

53 If you could have any job you wanted what would it be? This is it! Except maybe I'd also be exec producing a show (still, that plan is in the works... takes time to build up to that).

54 Wish you were somewhere else? Nope.

55 College plans: Who knows if I'll go back to finish the PhD. Eh, I love school, so I probably will.

56 Piercings: Two.

57 Do you do drugs? Nope.

58 Do you drink? Yep.

59 What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use? Three different kinds: Pantene, Finesse, and Be Long.

60 What are you most scared of? Heights (like on a ropes course--but NOT like rappelling down a mountain. Odd, isn't it?).

61 What clothes do you sleep in? Panties and a tank top.

62 Who is the last person that called you? An agent, making sure I got the tape of his clients he messengered over today.

63 Where do you want to get married? On the beach at sunset.

64 If you could change anything about yourself what would that be? I'd be forever a size 12. That's where my body is happy and that's a good healthy size for me to feel like the goddess I am. (Isn't it weird that, if I could change ANYTHING about myself, it would be my weight? Why not change that I'm obsessed with my body? Yeah... that would be a nice shift too.)

65 Who do you really hate? Oh, all right! If I must... how about high-maintenance people? But really, that's not hate. It's annoyance.

66 Been In Love? Constantly.

67 Are you timely or always late? Perpetually prompt.

68 Do you have a job? Yes. Several. Always.

69 Do you like being around people? I like being around myself the most (Mom taught me early in life to get comfortable with my own company, for which I'm grateful), but when I'm in a social place, I LOVE being a party girl. I'm very good in groups. I work a mean room.

70 Best feeling in the world? Satisfaction over a job well done. Any type of job.

71 Are you for world peace? Sure! In theory. It's just that it exists outside the theoretical that makes it hinky.

72 Are you a health freak? Yep.

73 Do you have a "type" of person you always go after? I used to. It was the artist, creative, tortured intellectual with passion and drive. Brilliant and funny and a bit cynical. Actually, y'know what? I think I still go for that type in all of my friendships and business dealings. Hm.

74 Do you want someone you don't have? Not really. I'm generally pretty satisfied in life.

75 Are you lonely right now? Nope.

76 Ever afraid you'll never get married? Nope. Keith says there are four types of marriage (spiritual, emotional, religious, and civil). Technically, we've been "married" for four years now, just not in all of the various ways recognized by society.

77 Do you want to get married? Not again! ;)

78 Do you want kids? Love having Quinn in my life. Hope to have a child when/if it's meant to be. Not really attached to it either way.

79 Cried today? Yes.

80 Bought something today? Dinner at Baja Fresh.

81 Gotten sick today? Nope.

82 Sang today? Yes.

83 Said I love you today? Of course!

84 Wanted to tell someone you loved them today? If I wanted to, I told them. I never hold back an "I love you."

85 Met someone today? No.

86 Moved on today? Oh, yes. I'm very proud of the way I've handled some issues with grace today.

87 Talked to someone today? Goodness, yes. Many someones, coordinating all of this casting stuff.

88 Had a serious talk today? Yes. Several.

89 Missed someone today? Yes.

90 Hugged someone today? Of course! Hugs are like oxygen!

91 Yelled at someone today? Only in a mock-yell, playing with Keith about his silliness.

92 Dreamed about someone you can't be with today? No.

93 Danced today? No.

94 I.M.ed someone today? Nope.

95 Watched TV today? Yes. And about a hundred demo reels and taped auditions on the computer's screen while editing for uploading.

96 Played dress up today? Only if you count wearing a sarong as "playing dress-up" (which Keith would, since I'm usually in shorts).

97 Left someone a comment today? Of course! I'm a very comment-y blog friend.

98 Sent someone more than five text messages today? I don't think I've sent someone more than five text messages *ever*.

99 Gone to the movies today? Nope. Just worked on casting one.

100 Completed another survey today? Just did, thanks. ;)

Okay... who's next? Ali? Kris? Deb? C'mon... y'know you want to!

Posted by bonnie at 12:08 AM

August 12, 2005

Oh, and...

...I can't find the "card" for the Spork Crab (which is brilliantly displayed in this month's Sea Scape), but just the same...

...I am inspired to heal the bay. Rock it!

Posted by bonnie at 4:10 AM

Well, finally!

Remember that wine from Sissa's wedding?

I finally opened it tonight!

It's one of those things where she told me to have it right away (like at the reception--where I had a migraine) but I honored it for three solid years, moved it to several different homes, etc.

And then finally, tonight, I had it. Which is fun b/c I'm both enjoying the hooch and honoring my Sissa, wherever she may be.

Oh, my Larry, life is good.

Posted by bonnie at 3:43 AM

August 10, 2005

Letter from the Cosmos

Dear Bon,

I'm sorry I've been such a ginormous pain in the arse for these past couple of weeks.

I know you've tried to remain calm (and keep others calm) in the face of my diva-demands and, usually, you are quite grace-filled when I come by (since you plan for the chaos I cause and always take extra time with everything, showing marvelous levels of patience), but I've just had to toy with you this time around.

Seeing you try to keep your cool when everything is going wrong at once, watching technology fail you, and noticing that communication simply never lands the way it was navigated has been a monkey-filled barrel of shits and giggles. Thanks for the laughs!

Love,
Mercury Retrograde

PS: At one point last week, you said this was the worst of me you could recall and Keith said he'd experienced worse. I must say I truly enjoyed the moment today when he finally said, "Yeah. I'm just hoping to live through this one. It's really bad." That was fun for me. Thank him, wouldja?

Posted by bonnie at 5:26 AM

August 9, 2005

Grr.

Because I'm having a grrrrrrrrr day (and Keith won't let me spray his ankles with compressed air), this is how I'm venting.

Meme snarked from Ames (and more of it below)...

LAYER ONE: ON THE OUTSIDE
Name: Bon
Birthdate: 07.11.70 (so cool and reflexive)
Birthplace: Hotlanta
Current Location: Hollywood (in spirit)
Hair Color: red, but in major need of a touch-up.
Righty or Lefty: lefty, except with scissors. It's weird.

LAYER TWO: ON THE INSIDE
Your heritage: Scotch-Irish, Cherokee, Dutch, and about a dozen other whatnots.
Shoes you wore today: the shoes I bought to replace the ones I really love, from Tweeds (RIP).
Your fears: rope courses, closed-off spaces, cotton balls (see standup comedy routine from Comedy Store 2000 for details).
Your perfect pizza: gluten-free (sadly, none exist).
Goal you'd like to achieve: absolute, unconditional self-love (same goal since Corey Allen's acting class at Margie Haber Studios, 1999).

LAYER THREE:
Since there is never a three, the rest of the meme is in the extended entry, should you be interested. ;)

LAYER FOUR: YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW
Your most overused phrase on IM: I don't IM. But when I chat at PARF on Fridays, it's probably LOL.
Your thoughts first waking up: Spoken: "Honey? Come be close!"
Your best physical feature: the rack. Always the rack.
Your bedtime: Huh?
Your most missed memory: plopping my head in my mom's lap, having her stroke my hair and baby-talk me, even at age 29.

LAYER FIVE: YOUR PICK
Pepsi or Coke: as a shareholder, it must be Coke, even though I'll have none of either.
McDonald's or Burger King: neither has good gluten-free choices, so... um... yeah, whatever.
Single or group dates: what's a DATE? Just kidding. Usually Dan Tana's and usually with whatever group of people has gathered. That means, sometimes group dates and sometimes it's just us and heavy-handed drink-pouring Mike.
Adidas or Nike: in honor of the great Mitchell Fink, it must be Adidas (swag is good).
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: rarely, so no opinion.
Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate.
Cappuccino or coffee: neither. I don't do the coffee.

LAYER SIX: DO YOU? or ARE YOU?
Smoke: not anymore.
Cuss: yup. Way too much.
Single: nope.
Have a crush: constantly.
Think you've been in love: perpetually.
Like high school: only sometimes.
Want to get married: in denial. ;)
Believe in yourself: absolutely.
Get motion sickness: yes. Especially in the back seat of a Towncar or in a plane with a hangover.
Think you're attractive: sometimes. Sometimes I'm a goddess like none other. Other times I'm slothzilla. It's part of having a childstar/teen-anorexic brain. Hard to fix.
Think you're a health freak: anytime I'm pegged to one extreme or another, I'm either alcoholic or obsessed with fitness. Depends on the day you catch me. Right now, I'm working out like a maniac and wish I could hit the gym several hours a day. *shrug*
Get along with your parents: who?
Like thunderstorms: miss 'em like crazy!
Play an instrument: probably can plunk out a few notes on just about anything and can read sheet music enough to get by.

LAYER SEVEN: IN THE PAST MONTH
Drank alcohol: yup.
Gone on a date: sure.
been on stage: constantly.
eaten an entire box of Oreos: never!
Eaten sushi: not since going gluten-free. :( Bummer, since I love/miss sushi.
Been dumped: only by the CSA.
Gone skating: no, but I read about it, at Chip's blog, plus others.
Gone skinny dipping: oh, man... it was a year ago, but we did that nightly while house-sitting and LOVED it. We sooooooo need a pool.
Stolen anything: no. I've gotten much better. ;)

LAYER EIGHT: HAVE YOU EVER
Played a game that required removal of clothing: of course.
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: sure.
Been caught "doing something:" like... sex? Sure. I'm old. It happens. ;)
Been called a tease: just the other day by MCJ!!
Gotten beaten up: yeah, but I usually beat as well as I got beaten. Ask Scott Freeman or Jared Herbst, the boys I beat up back in my school days. ;)

LAYER NINE: GETTING OLDER
Age you hope to be married: 34.
Number of Children: well, there's Quinn, which counts. I'd like to have a girl, but I don't know... we have to be in a really secure financial situation before we bring more kids into the world. Quinn-support and OUR OWN support is plenty, right now.
Describe your dream wedding: I love that this is in "getting older." LOL
How do you want to die: in my sleep, without pain, like Mom did.
What do you want to be when you grow up: always living my dream, whatever that should become.
Where would you most like to visit: there's a major list there, really. Changes regularly. Almost always involves a passport.

LAYER TEN: IN A GAL/GUY
Best eye color: brown
Best hair color: dark brown
Short or long hair: longish
Height: 6'+
Best first date location: very public.
Best first kiss location: lips.

LAYER ELEVEN: IN THE NUMBERS
Number of people I could trust with my life: hm. A few. Hard to quantify. A few, certainly.
Number of CDs I own: ha! In the world of "CD as Casting Director," I'd say only me. ;) In the world of that musical disc... I'd say 300-400, maybe.
Number of piercings: two.
Number of tattoos: two.
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: oh, goodness, too many. My RSiCopyright services indicate my name is in print pretty effin' regularly, which is kinda cool. Most of the time, it's actually me, and not the Red Cross admin or the Board of Regents member (much less the stripper).
Number of scars on my body: more than a few. I count tattooed-over scars as scars, moles I wish were gone as scars, and being a keloid kid, I'd say I have a goodly number of scars to count. I try not to count. Why quantify pain? I'd rather count the number of happy places.

Well, that was fun. Definitely improved my mood, even for a moment. Now the bed! ;)

Posted by bonnie at 4:01 AM

August 6, 2005

Weddings Are Fun

Today, Keith and I spent some wonderful time with old friends at the celebration of marriage between Tracy Eliott (AKA Tracy Hernandez) and Dick Tatum (AKA Richard Rosenblatt). We got lots of laughs out of the various combinations of names, plus enjoyed a brilliant toast from... who was that oh-so-funny guy? Richard? Robert? Augh... didn't catch it.

Barry Carver performed a beautiful wedding (that's him above, holding JA, for Tracy and Dick, several years ago--click for larger). Children played like children do. We made new friends. It was delightful.

I was worried about wearing jeans, but then I said, "LOOK. They want you there. They don't care what you're wearing." I'm so glad I talked myself into going despite my lack of suitable wardrobe options. That's just a constant battle for me, so it's nice to just get over it for a moment and go have fun with dear friends.

And, since this post is about wedded bliss (and yes, Dawn, it does seem that this wedding thing is in the air lately), I thought I'd share this gorgeous photo of Cousin Faith Salie and my new cousin-in-law Nick Holly. Again, click for a larger version of this princess photo. What lovely bliss! Cool tie-in: Faith's former castmate Brian Palermo went to college with Tracy, so he was at the wedding today, among all of the ARK friends, Wolfesden folks, and years of Orphans Christmas Dinners-buddies.

What's beautiful about celebrating unions like this is that we all benefit from the reminder that we do need one another. Keith and I talked on the way to the wedding about my upbringing (wherein survival and independence was championed above partnership and investment in others--since others can go away) and how every day that he is in my life is a triumph of human connection over going it alone.

Awesome.

Posted by bonnie at 7:35 PM

July 26, 2005

Longest Blog Entry EVER

Or, well, it *will* be, when I finish it. Right now, it's just a list of stuff I'm going to say, when I come back around to this. Right now, I still have way way way too much to do to get caught up. And it's only a few hours since I got home.

1. I'm home from the casting gig in Missouri.
a. Dayum it's HAWT there.
b. Stephens College: visiting professor offer.
c.
d. Feedback that I've inspired people to become CDs.
e. Cobras (and several other teams from the Junior Soccer League) staying in my hotel during their state-wide tourney.
f. Grinders?
g. I hate getting hangnails while traveling.
h. Mayo with fries?
i. Put ice in my bra on the heated tin can that was the Jetstream 41.
j. Pizza is $3.80 (yes, *a* pizza. No, I didn't have any, just noticed the price and remembered the good ol' college town days).
k. My bizarre sleeping style in hotel rooms.

2. I got several good column ideas from riding on the plane (conversations with strangers about what I do. Why do I always sit next to chatty people?) and speaking to filmmakers about actors (rather than speaking to actors about the casting process, which I usually do), and casting a film in ten hours.

3.

4. Our brilliant LAX parking scheme and how confused the parking attendant was, trying to figure out how we pulled it off.

5. Thwok has a fat lip.

6. I have a review of the first season of The Amazing Race.

7. I think Thirteen may be the most compelling film I've seen in a long, long time.

8. I have reports about Celebrity Fit Club 2 and other lies told in the media (such as: "Diane Lane is 35" and "Kirstie Alley is a size 12"). Plus, commentary on the imbalance that is the performers on this season of the trainwreck show. What fucknuts!

9. Acting Qs has been reviewed (PDF is on this page--July 2005 Hollywood How-To from Bob Fraser). Excerpt to come.

10. Friends I'm proud of:
a. Camille Mana (series regular on One on One).
b. Blake Robbins (recurring on The OC).
c.
d. Pamela Jansen (in Fearless Women, which was delivered to me with one of the best personal notes I've ever received from an actor).
e. Jasmine Jessica Anthony (series regular on Commander in Chief).
f. a dozen other actors in my life who are booking work these days. Dizzying to try and keep up (quality problem)!

11. Being okay with being imperfect. (This ties in with Pamela's letter. Esp. re: notation of BA instead of MA for my credit in the UGA book contribution.)

12. Searches. You're right, CoCo. They're starting to get funny.

13. Catching up:
a. Why the ATF came over.
b. The cat that meditates to the Stones (and the one that chills in the backpack).
c. Cool sofa repair guy.
d. Fantastic 4.

14. New favorite drink: ginger margarita.

15. Changing the clock on the SixHundy caused me to do something really odd tonight.

16. Grammar. STOP THIS: "Sam and I's relationship is over." Seriously. Stop it. You're killin' me with that crap.

17. Kill Reality redux (they KNOW it's more about charisma and being bold than nailing the read) and how funny it is to see Trashelle doing reality yet again after she swore NEVER after the second Surreal Life. Brilliant producers. Seriously.

Best quote?

I understand Toni's desire to dig a little deeper. I understand that many great actors want to get inside their character. But I'm pretty sure that none of those great actors were on Paradise Hotel.

HOWL!

18. Go look at this--Celebrities Eating--and be sad that there is an industry built around "catching" people with extraordinary jobs doing ordinary things. And then laugh, since some of the photos are way funny. Thanks to BrYan for that one. Oh, and for this one too. Tee hee! That's a different kind of quiz!

More later. It's good to be home.

Posted by bonnie at 1:21 AM

July 21, 2005

My New Favorite Wine

In case you're interested...

is Ferrari-Carano. This was introduced to me at the rockstar birthday dinner at The Palm (thank you, Bob Brody) and I really do love it.

Almost time to leave for Missouri.

Did I mention the stack of scripts in the "to read" pile? So so so much going on! Have a great weekend, everyone! I'll try to blog from the SixHundy. XXOO

Posted by bonnie at 11:46 PM

July 16, 2005

Definition of Friendship

What's a friend? I mean a true-blue, love-ya-forever, amazingly-good-people level friend.

That'd be friends like Shon and Jodi.

Why?

Well, here they are, guest-starring on That's So Raven, having graciously invited us to see them work (which rocked; they were both really amazing and very funny), watching a scene or two in playback between live scenes (at which time the pages were handing out slices of pizza to the members of the audience). Okay, so these great actors *should* be basking in the glow of their accomplishments, enjoying watching their own work on the monitors, gearing up for their next live scenes, or simply enjoying the downtime schmooze with Disney execs (who were all over the set, for damn sure). What are they doing instead?

Noticing that pizza is not gluten-free, and therefore their friend Bonnie will not be able to eat a snack during this break in taping. Not only did they NOTICE this, but they grabbed a bowl, visited the craft services table, loaded up mixed raw veggies and fruits, and snuck the bowl up to us in the audience!

If THAT is not the very basic underlying principle to friendship, I don't know what is!

Now, outside of that particular moment (which was sincerely touching), this was one of our favorite nights out in awhile (and that's among a whole bunch of seriously amazing nights out of late). Turns out tonight was Shon and Jodi's manager's birthday. So, there was celebration both on the set (Emmy nominations and the first live shoot back this season) and off (congrats to Jodi on the recurring role, to Shon on the guest-star gig, my birthday, John's birthday, and Keith's signing with Origin), which we took care of with champagne at the ArcLight (my first time there; very cool).

Great night. Great talent. Great friends. That's really the best part of it all.

Posted by bonnie at 1:17 AM

July 9, 2005

Where to begin...

Where do you begin when you have so so so so much going on that you can't even begin to STOP and organize thoughts into words (much less organize thoughts into words that accurately represent the non-stop goings-on)? Whew! I am spinning!! LOVE IT... but it's a LOT of swirl. I feel like I'm in the center of a kick-ass Spirograph design with lots of color. It's gorgeous, complex, and thrilling to behold. But, man, is it a lot to wrap my brain around!

We've finished up prereads for Shrinks. Wow. Some of the most amazing (and also some of the most baffling) actors I've seen, for this one. I'm thrilled with the actors we'll be bringing to callbacks (once we are able to cut down even further; we currently have too many actors on our short list). As for what was baffling... well... let's just say I actually WISH there were a Hollywood Blacklist so that I could make sure one actor is on it. *shudder* I have written (for the first time, ever): NEVER AGAIN across a headshot. I'll explain why over drinks somewhere, sometime... later.

Just got back from the Chandler Hall table read (I didn't stay for any of the read itself; just went at the start to get the last two actors to sign off on their SAG contracts and to get *my* final check for casting services). It is so very cool to see all of the actors cast in one place at the same time. Casting directors never really get to do that. We may see two or three together during chemistry checks at callbacks, but it's so neat to see a dozen confident, CAST, happy actors gathering, meeting, ready to begin the journey that will result in a feature film a year from now. Very gratifying.

Happily completing my essay (to go with my application) for joining the CSA. Received a copy of the letter Michael Donovan wrote on my behalf. It made me cry. What a wonderful man! And truly, he has been a mentor for me since the very beginning of this road (heck, even before I had any idea it was a path)! Wonderful letter. Wonderful man.

In fact, Michael was one of the first people Keith called with the good news. Yup. Keith Johnson, just three years after his first acting gig in Los Angeles, has signed with Origin Talent. That's right. THE Origin Talent. That's Origin Talent of JP Manoux, Katie Stuart, Patrick Malone, Susan Wood, Rodney Rowland, Kate Flannery, Christa Campbell, Suzanne Krull, Patrick Bristow, Jf Pryor, Will Wallace, Sean Bell, Rusty Joiner, Lindsay Hollister, Jake Hanover, Jessica Lancaster, and *ahem* Bob Clendenin fame. Awwwwww, yeah! That's a working actor agency, baby!

Fucking rockstar development. Abby Casey is the best manager on the planet and Keith Johnson now has a manager and TWO agents. Kathleen Schultz for print (signed earlier this week), and now Origin frickin' Talent. So so so so so amazing. Just unbelievable and delightful and perfect. Congratulations, my working actor baby. Oh, and break a leg at your THIRD producer callback session for Big Love. Nail it to the fucking wall!

*ahem* Sorry 'bout the f-word all over the place. I'm just really happy.

Okay, so in a week full of amazing developments, I get this email from someone who has read my advice in a new book published by the UGA Alumni Association.

Seems my advice to 2005 UGA grads is on page 35. You can download the whole PDF by clicking that phrase. If you just want to see my passage in If I Only Knew Then..., click here (also PDF, just smaller). I shared advice that was shared by my aunt Jean, back when I was in crisis over my decision to move back to Atlanta and go to grad school. I couldn't believe I was actually considering leaving Hollywood. It was my PLAN. She taught me about Plan A and Plan B... well... read the passage. You'll see. Cool to have already gotten email about it.

And, I sent a note to Aunt Jean to thank her for the advice and to show her the impact it obviously had on me. I'm guessing she doesn't even recall that particular conversation, but it certainly helped me, in those tough early-20s (when you're so sure you know how your life is going to turn out and think it's WRONG to not know (vs. how blissful it is to not know, which you eventually learn)).

I love living in Santa Monica. We're almost at our anniversary here. So blissful. Being so close to the beach, being able to walk everywhere, the cool weather, the friendly people. Ah, people laugh about, "Never wanting to go east of the 405," but Keith tells them I try not to go east of 26th Street! The temperature drops there, when you're coming back from "the rest of LA" to the Westside. It's not just that, though. It's also the vibe. My pulse actually slows at that point. I relax differently. It's awesome.

And while I love my digs... man, doesn't this place look cool?

It's almost that time! I'm really excited about this birthday. It's been an outstanding year.

That's Ash in last weekend's LA Times. (Click it to see the whole article/scan--very large.) Go, girl. You are definitely the breakout star of MTV's The '70s House. Win! Win big!

Okay. If you haven't already, shame on you. And go NOW. Read the brilliance that is (collectively) Colleen Wainwright's "Searches, We Get Searches" blogs. Of course, every bit of her blog is brilliant, but it's the SEARCH stuff that makes me *snork* (snort-laugh). So much, in fact, I asked her to teach me how to track searches to my blog so that I could try to be so funny.

So far... here's what I've got. In seven weeks of tracking, the most interesting searches that have come my way have been (and my lame attempt at comedy follows each):

Eva Longoria Golden Globes (Yes, yes she does. Mmmmmm.)
Greer Shephard dress (She does, too. Probably once or twice every day!)
Miata touch-up paint Miata (That's catchy! I could sing that.)
photo of Kevan Jenson (Hm. I don't have one, but I'll see if I can snap a pic on the SixHundy on Wednesday, if you'd like.)
star caps (Tooth-coverings for famous people? Headgear for celestial bodies? Five-point bullets? Nah... just a bright-orange, garlic-smelling herbal drug thingy.)

How'd I do, Coco? You say the searches will get better with time, right? ;) Hopefully the comedy will too.

Just transition artwork, above. It says my name. Cool, huh?

Okay, so we took a vote in the Gillespie-Johnson household. Best Hunter: Thwok. Sexiest Vixen: Salema. Sweetest Oaf: Archie (although Keith was close on that one... he's not as sweet).

Oh, and Lily, here's my blog!

'Til next time!

(reminders to self: blog about why a special agent from the ATF stopped by on Thursday, the cat that meditates to the Stones, Fantastic 4, and cool sofa repair guys. also look up the date's for Joni's vist, find out if the casting gig in MO and the trip to Tahoe are mutually exclusive, roll out a SMFA seminar press release, and consult the SixHundy for the rest of the scary to do list. that is all. back to work. stop with the blogging and trust that you'll remember all the other shyte you want to write about when the time is there to do so. seriously. go now. now.)

Posted by bonnie at 11:41 AM

July 5, 2005

Checkin' In

Ooh, just so so so so much going on. Truly baffling and mind-spinning. Non-stop.

And I love (almost) all of it. Heck, even the stuff I'm not loving, I'm learning from. And THAT I'm loving. So, that's dang cool.

Just wanted to check in, so the blog doesn't go too long without a HOWDY.

Howdy! ;) Laytahz.

Posted by bonnie at 2:48 AM

July 1, 2005

Reasons I'm Sad/Reasons I'm Happy

1. (Sad) . Honestly, Luther (and one of the Tonies from Tony Toni Toné) was one of the best-smelling guys I ever worked for, back in my Left Bank Management days. As much as I loved taking weed over to JT's house, catching Richard's stalker, making the world believe the '93 album was the second LP from Meat, making the last contract offer ever made to Nirvana, chilling with the brothers G, or helping Joey with his folks, I have to say that it was Luther Vandross who was loving, sweet, genunie, and just a big ball of love-to-hug. What a loss! Too soon. We'll miss you.

2. (Sad) . Are you kidding me? You couldn't wait an effin' three years to help us out? Ugh. I remember when you were brought onboard, Ms. Sandra Day O'Connor. I'm feeling as old as you must feel. I just feel mad at you for handing the keys of freedom over to that rat bastard W. Grr.

3.

4. (Happy) (click it to read it). Cool mail from Tom Fontana, who wrote our kick-ass foreword. It seems he enjoyed the gig too. Right on.

5. (Happy) . Did my application for the CSA and asked for reference letters from my favorite casting mentors. Very happy. *fingers crossed* for approval, seeing as the vote for new members takes place on my birthday (that can't possibly be a bad sign).

6. No pic. Just love. I'm a happy happy happy gal. Cast is near-locked for Chandler Hall (even received flowers from the actor we cast in the lead; a lovely note saying, "I didn't know what your favorite flowers were, so I sent you mine. Thanks for everything! Your Jimmy Bravo," (SUCH A CLASS ACT)), auditions are scheduled for Shrinks, and... best for last... Keith has signed with his first AGENT. Yup. My cute boy now has a PRINT AGENT in Los Angeles. It would seem "NFL-lovin' grill dad" is big biz in the sale circulars! Cool deal!

Big weekend. Big love. Woo damn hoo!

Posted by bonnie at 11:22 PM

June 21, 2005

Accomplishments

1. Got the prereads for Chandler Hall scheduled (sides out, top actors for each role scheduled, etc.).

2. Got A New Tomorrow final cast list handed off to production (just need to get the cast webpage updated now).

3.

4. Sent out MOST of the comp copies of Acting Qs. Got an amazing thank-you note from Tom Fontana, as well as super feedback from actors interviewed. I'll share soon.

5. Quinn had his playdate with Drake (that's Drake on set, above). They really enjoyed themselves. Turns out Puzzle Zoo is like the coolest store EVER. Will post photos from Quinn's visit when I can. I promise!

6. Got someone at SAG to agree to fax over the Limited Ex talent contract (even though it's only good for another couple of weeks--then we go to Ultra Low Budget contracts for SAG). Bless you, Paul Bales, for the fax!! (Will pick up a copy of the AEA 99-seat Code while in the building tonight, thanks to Nancy Daly.)

7. Got Quinn *mostly* packed, though he'll leave without his memory book completed this year, for the first time (bummer. I just could NOT get it together quickly. We'll mail it later). LOVE the drawings he's leaving behind. Perfect fridge material!

8. Confirmed that tonight's SAG LifeRaft event is over-booked with a waiting list--which means it will fly by (and we're taking 150 copies of Self-Management for Actors to give away). C'mon DayQuil! Hook me up!

9. Got Quinn's "LOVE QUINN" scrawled on all of our thank you notes from this week's 1/2-birthday gifts and treats. Seriously, Quinn had an amazing time! (I'll get 'em out in the mail later.)

10. Purged a few thousand pages of sides from previous projects' auditions, which felt good in a major way. Amazing the little things we can do when sick that happen to improve the general spirits, without taking too much out of us physically.

11. Slept. That was the biggie. Still not 100% (and Keith is worse), but enough to get the talk done tonight, get Keith and Quinn to the airport, and then get back home to write the breakdown for Shrinks, do Rox work, update the business-hours list for tomorrow, and get all of the email-based contact work possible done before Wednesday rolls around. Ack. Exhausted just looking at all of this.

So, I'll stop. Time to get on the road soon anyway. Thanks for all the good vibes, everyone! They feel GREAT!

Posted by bonnie at 2:25 PM

Q&A

Q: Where is Bonnie?

A: See old blog.

Ugh. Bleh. Zzzzzzz.

That is all.

Posted by bonnie at 12:55 AM

June 15, 2005

Oy, so...

I've crossed everything off my list, plus subbed to every RSS feed (of interest) I could find (though I'm not *quite* sure what that RSS thingy means), and I've sent all of the potential local hires on to the director of the feature film I'm MAINLY casting right now (not finished with everything just yet).

(Yes, I'm having to learn what it is to cast three projects simulatneously and how to decide which is the "leader" in every call I make. Oh, and... I'm reminded that people at this point hire ASSISTANTS, for cryin' out loud!!)

Whut?

View this, this, and... well... there is no three. Judge me now. It's not my fault! AND... if you're free, join us Thursday 7:30pm-ish for a little gathering. Hit me with a comment ASAP if you're free and want to head west for a glass-raising of some sort. SO much to celebrate! And... there's meeting the brilliant, beautiful Q-man!!

Oh, so, I get a call from Keith and learn that Quinn has taken a face-dive into the dock on the way to Catalina. My response, "Can you clean him up?" Answer, "I can clean HIM up better than *I* clean up!" Well, duh! I mean, I love ya, Keith, but we ALL admit that Quinn is parented better than we were! LOL

Such such SUCH a good kid! Kudos to the moms for taking such good care of him! I love how generous, loving, and affectionate that boy is!!

Photos will come! Hang in!

Posted by bonnie at 1:19 AM

June 13, 2005

Further Updates

And here are today's updates, as of this moment.

I have a script to read, offers to fax, feedback to provide [still dragging feet on this one], bills to pay, books to sign [ended up chatting, instead], books to pack [ditto], books to mail [yeah, yeah, yeah], headshots to open, headshots to sort [still in progress], headshots to purge [I think this one is a forever-in-progress deal], a screen to put back in a window [waits for Keith], three websites to update [ugh. dragging feet], a font to install [actually can no longer use Word. major problems since the Tiger upgrade. Ugh], and dayplayers to enter into the Breakdowns system to email to producers [not urgent].

Wow, and I also did about ten things that weren't on the list. That's fun. Still more to do (always)... but I'm super-intimidated by the items I saw in last month's Real Simple (just got to read it) called "This Clean House." I'll post that insane list later. No WAY I could keep up with THOSE standards. *shudder* I'm supposed to wash my lamp shades every six months?

PS--I love Fight for Fame. Is that wrong? Should I lie? (Ooh, it's probably due to the high number of people in each week's episode that I know. That would explain part of the appeal.)

Posted by bonnie at 5:19 PM

June 12, 2005

List Thus Far

Updates to the list thus far:

I have a script to read [read enough to know I'll accept the offer to cast it tomorrow], a column to write, offers to fax [got authorization for dollar amounts on three of them, holding on one more], feedback to provide [this is going to take forever and I always worry I miss something and end up just not doing any, which I hate, since I know it helps the actors to get feedback], bills to pay [that's the very next item, I promise], books to sign [can do that with wine, later], books to pack [ditto], books to mail [pack 'em up for Keith to take after he and Quinn return from NoCal], headshots to open [ugh, that's forever in the making], headshots to sort [this list is still way overwhelming], headshots to purge [I thought I'd gotten so much done today], a screen to put back in a window [waits for Keith], a shower to take, litter to scoop, dishes to wash, three websites to update [coming soon], a font to install [having some bugs with the Tiger upgrade... must research], and dayplayers to enter into the Breakdowns system to email to producers [later].

Holy bejeebus. I thought I'd gotten so much done already. Lists are evil. (No, they're not. I know that.)

PS--I cannot watch ten minutes of television without seeing an actor I know. That's kind of cool.

PPS--It seems I will get to officially make an offer to one of the most talented actors I know tomorrow (and someone I count as a friend) to star in one of the movies I'm casting. I'm so so so so so freakin' excited about this film. Can't wait to make it official!! Rockstar!

Posted by bonnie at 6:10 PM

Bored

So, why is it when I have a kazillion things to do (and I am not *even* kidding when I say "kazillion," I really do have THAT MUCH STUFF to do) that I end up bored?

It just makes like no sense. How can I be bored when I have sooooo much to do? And all of it causes me more than a little bit of stress. Hm. Maybe I'm chosing boredom over stress. I guess that makes sense.

The "S" key on my PowerBook has a patch worn through. So, I guess it *is* the most common letter. For me, at least.

See? Bored. And I have a script to read, a column to write, offers to fax, feedback to provide, bills to pay, books to sign, books to pack, books to mail, headshots to open, headshots to sort, headshots to purge, a screen to put back in a window, a shower to take, litter to scoop, dishes to wash, three websites to update, a font to install, and dayplayers to enter into the Breakdowns system to email to producers. All of that needs to happen before Monday morning.

Yeah. And I'm noticing the worn-out "S" key. And making lists of the things I'm not doing. Sunday should be interesting. Look at all of those S-es I typed! Esses? Oh... and I found the first typo in the new book. :\ Page 129. Transposed a period and a close-paren. I'll decide that's in homage to Frances. How 'bout that?

Posted by bonnie at 3:54 AM

June 8, 2005

Obsession

Have you ever been so totally and completely obsessed with something that you cannot fathom NOT thinking about it, even for a second?

Yeah. I've been obsessed with 1990 Mazda Miata touch-up paint.

*sigh*

Not well.

See, when you have a nearly 16-year-old car, you need to touch up the paint in places from time to time. And when you pack to MOVE, you put things like the touch-up paint you bought ON THE SAME DAY YOU BOUGHT THE CAR in one of several boxes that (after the move) may not get completely unpacked--or even ones that may get put deep into a closet for storage, since you haven't needed anything in the boxes for months--and God help you if you think you can begin to find said touch-up paint when you realize there's a little fleck-off going on after the TicTac had a visit to the carwash.

Worse, give up EVER thinking you could find the damn thing, if you just looked ONE MORE TIME inside EVERY FREAKIN' box, drawer, closet, storage unit of EVERY kind... but please do go ahead and LOOK one more time (scratch that... not ONE more time... try a dozen more times). But don't you DARE stop THINKING that you *could* possibly find it, if you just looked ONE more time.

Again.

*sigh*

I told you I was NOT WELL.

Yes. I finally broke down and spent the FIVE BUCKS plus shipping to order the dang thing from a Miata shop online. Do you think *maybe* I could stop obsessing about where the damn thing is now?

Place yer bets, folks!

PS--I realized that the producer callback Keith had today was for the same show he's gone to producers for once before during pilot season. Effin' rockstar!

PPS--Just got home from a great industry thingy hosted by the TMA, Breakdowns, Barefoot Wine, and the Hollywood Reporter for the CBS fall season roll-out (preview, keynote, and panel). Way cool. Awesome giftbags! Swag is goooood.

Posted by bonnie at 12:05 AM

May 22, 2005

Best Things on TV

Best things on TV tonight?

That'd be Tina Fey doing the Risky Business spoof on Saddam Hussein in his BVDs and Keegan Michael Key doing "Man Up" stomp on MadTV. God bless TV that doesn't get cancelled. Ever!

WB Shows Cancelled
NBC Shows Cancelled
Fox Shows Cancelled (What???? Life on a Stick? Cancelled? Noooooo!) *rolls eyes*
ABC Shows Cancelled
CBS Shows REMAINING
UPN Shows REMAINING

Huge bummer-meter on the Joan of Arcadia cancellation in our household. That was a Season Pass for Keith. :( And, bigger bummer that our friends' pilots didn't get picked up. Still... I believe it'll happen. There's really good material there... and SOMEWHERE, there is an audience for stuff THAT good. 'Til then... we watch the bad and wish network TV fed us better morsels. :\

Oh, and as if I needed an extraction team to get me out of the house on Thursday nights... there's Hit Me Baby, One More Time, which seriously must be worse than that ballroom dancing show on UPN ABC (thanks, Ames).

Posted by bonnie at 12:24 AM

May 7, 2005

Geography

Two quizzes from Maria. One from weeks ago that I kept forgetting to put on here. A funny T-shirt spied in NY. Plus a rant and a thank you.

You Belong in London

A little old fashioned, and a little modern. A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock. A unique woman like you needs a city that offers everything. No wonder you and London will get along so well.
What City Do You Belong in?

Nope. Too cold. Too rainy. No London. But thanks.

American Cities That Best Fit You:

75% Los Angeles

65% Honolulu

65% Portland

55% Atlanta

55% Chicago

Which American Cities Best Fit You?

Yup. That's about right.

You scored as Chelsea.

Chelsea is an area in Lower Manhattan west of Park Avenue from about 30th Street to about 14th Street which includes the Flatiron District. It's well known as a gay friendly area. It's also really hip and upscale. It's great place to shop for things for the home. If there is some kind of new innovative soap dish out you're bound to find it here. There are a lot of good places to eat... but, the prices can be a little high. The bartenders in this area are some of the best in the city and they know how to make everything. When some new drink comes out you can bet it came from Chelsea! The only draw back is the entire place is crawling with yuppies. But if you're a yuppie that's probably Okay.

Chelsea 83%
Alphabet City 72%
SoHo/TriBeCa 67%
Upper West Side/Morningside Heights 67%
Hell's Kitchen/Theatre District 61%
Stuyvesant Town 61%
Inwood 56%
Harlem 50%
Kips Bay 50%
El Barrio 45%
China Town 28%
Upper East Side 22%
Financial District/Battery Park 17%
Washington Heights 11%

Which neighborhood in Manhattan is best for you?
created with QuizFarm.com

A note about TriBeCa: I was seriously embarrassed for the mess of people interviewed during the TriBeCa Film Festival who couldn't tell you what "TriBeCa" meant. Worse, even, was that the show doing the story (some Entertainment Tonight-type show) got it wrong, saying, "It's short for the Triangle shape the district makes!"

*thud*

Morons. That takes care of "Tri." You just need to look at your little map to come up with "Be" and "Ca." Sheesh!

Oh, and thanks for all the support and love on the panic attack stuff. I'm doing better. Need some more time. I'm taking it. Yay!

Posted by bonnie at 1:12 PM

May 5, 2005

Two Things

Go read about this adorable baby. I think it's way cool that he's doing so well--and has such great fashion sense!

Don't read about me. I'm still flying into panic attacks several times a day. I blame this chemical:

Keith says it could also be "seasonal stress" due to the double-whammy of Mom's birthday and Mother's Day, but I would hope, by now, I'm less crisis-level upset and more just normal-sad about that.

Ugh. I'm sick of all this up and down mood crap. I don't have time for it and it's making me really frustrated, agoraphobic, and manic.

Posted by bonnie at 12:09 PM

May 3, 2005

Many New Things

So... what up, G?

Buttloads. That's what.

Sheesh! I'm seriously blogging now.

Politically incorrect observation #1: There is much more traffic on surface streets these days. Why? Someone who wants less traffic on the freeways is shooting people to get the road to himself. Mission accomplished. We're all taking Wilshire now.

Politically incorrect observation #2: What kind of society do we live in where a fallen child star (Danny Bonaduce) can pull himself together, get clean, get a top-rated radio show, do voiceovers and guest spots on prime time TV regularly, often admit that he had his "major addict" days... and then manage to slide, publicly, back down off that wagon (and saying so, regularly), yet be supported in his work environment... and THEN get ridiculed when he puts himself back in rehab?

I mean, really... if you SAY you're slipping, if you OWN that you are boozing it up... how can ANYONE decide to judge your arse once you do the RIGHT deed, which is signing up for help? Fuck! If they're going to bitch about you, they should do so when you're boozing in front of them and trying to hide it. That's what I expect, when I'm off-wagon-falling. At the very least!

There is no politically incorrect observation number three, as there is never a three (which really should be some other number) based on the reality created by somesuch-whatnot and the good folks there.

Not politically incorrect, but amusing... Chip took this shot at the Twilight Criterium. Oh, how I remember the bliss that was our WUOG Sports Director living in the pace car for that in '95! Ah, memories.

Further not politically incorrect, but perhaps self-aggrandizing, is the observation that I no longer am capable of casting a "small project." It started when the first actor arrived at the audition location today. He said, "This must be some good production company with a healthy budget, to get you on board!" I laughed and said, "Oh, honey... I'm very affordable--I'm still at the beginning of my casting journey and that means I'm doing the same thing actors do, at the beginning of their careers: working cheap and choosing great projects with wonderful people."

Typically, one out of every ten actors says something about my books, my columns, previous casting visits, my online presence, speaking engagements, etc. This time? One out of every TWO.

And.

I can usually count on 30 no-shows out of 150 scheduled appointments. This time? NONE. Not ONE no-show. And I am so terribly sad that some people had to leave, after waiting for so long, and/or that people just waited and waited and waited so more. I ALWAYS HAVE ON-TIME SESSIONS! It really bummed me out to suddenly NOT. But then it occurred to me (and Keith said it out loud) that I'm suddenly not a CD who people think is casting one or two little projects here and there--but I'm someone who people know (in an: "if it's not this project, it's the next" type thing) will soon be casting something else they want to get on my radar for... and they show up. THEY SHOW UP! Even if they aren't confirmed, they show up.

Crap. I've just bumped up a tier. I've steadily increased my day rate for casting indies and I continue to get offers. WTF?? I increased my rate to cut down on the number of projects I got, and it's not happening. Sure enough, it's a sign that I'm right where I'm supposed to be and doing it right.

But now I have to schedule far fewer actors for auditions than I'd like to. That sucks. But, I guess it's a quality problem.

Looking forward to the day when I can hire MCJ (My Cousin Joni) to be my full-time assistant and get loads more work done with the sense of efficiency that only a Virgo can provide.

BTW--I love actors! Everyone rocked today. Amazing, how wonderful and confident so many actors are. I love that. I am such a fan of so many wonderful people!

Posted by bonnie at 8:39 PM

May 1, 2005

Saturation Point

I'm often overwhelmingly busy. Frequently, those who know me ask how it's possible that manage to get it all done (the flippant answer is always, "I don't sleep") and still maintain sanity (the flippant answer is, "What sanity?").

I think, though, today...

I reached a saturation point. I can't do it all. I've tried to be very smart about pacing myself all weekend so that I could somehow make it through everything that had to be done by Monday. I was methodical and clever and even asked for help (which is so unlike me). I knew, with good vibes and process, I could make it.

And I haven't.

And I won't.

Some things are just going to have to be NOT done.

It sucks and I hate it and feel like a failure (even when 95% of everything I had to do is at 85% completion or higher).

But.

I'm not going to do that to myself. I'm not a failure. I'm a workaholic perfectionist with OCD and sometimes it just doesn't all work out.

So there!

Much better.

Posted by bonnie at 7:23 PM

April 30, 2005

Some People!

Okay, I'm seriously over these people.

So, this Georgia chick is overwhelmed by the fact that she's getting married and has invited 600 people to the wedding. So, she runs away from home (leaving no note), and the world launches a search for this missing woman. Resources are used up, dogs are sniffing for her, posters are being put up, a reward for her safe return is created, her fiancé is questioned, the family is distrought.

Finally! She calls 911 from New Mexico. Woo hoo! She's alive! She's safe! She's going to be okay--despite the fact that she's been kidnapped and driven across the country in a van. Bless her heart, she sounds so emotional on the 911 call. What an ordeal she must've faced! Thank God she's alive!

Today, bitch comes clean about the whole effin' hoax. Cold feet.

Police say they won't charge her with any kind of criminal act.

PLEASE, though, could they BILL HER for the expense her little game surely cost "the system" (not to mention those who worried so)?

Reminds me of the dillhole who parked his SUV on the beach last summer. He drove right past all the signs that said NO DRIVING ON THE BEACH and parked, drank, watched the ocean. Watched 'til it came right up and swept his car out to sea.

He jumped out and used his cell to call 911. Tons of emergency workers poured out to the beach, but when they realized they were going to have to wrangle the SUV out of the clutches of the sea, they decided to simply wait for the tide to go out. It was really all they could do.

This bozo goes on the news talking about how he's going to sue the authorities for NOT doing anything to save his SUV from further damage. Look, fucknut, I want them to sue YOU for having needed rescue personnel at all that day, as you blew off the rules and took care of your needs to drink at the beach in your ride.

Pff.

Some people!

Anyway... when I need to call off a wedding, I say, "It's off." I don't concoct a story about being kidnapped and driven cross country. WhatEVER!

Posted by bonnie at 1:19 PM

April 29, 2005

Mr. Blue Sky

Something so wonderful about having signed off on the book, having *gulp* paid for the printing of the book, and waking up to a gorgeous, blue sky day.

Fun fact: my first concert was ELO at the Omni in 1980. I wore my (hand-me-down) red Gloria Vanderbilt jeans and a rainbow-metalic belt (on loan from my cousin). I was soooooo dang cool. And, man, what a GREAT show!

Now, what I'd love to do is go outside and enjoy this lovely day. What I must do, though, is schedule a hundred actors (out of 3500 actors who submitted on this film since the breakdown went out late Monday night) for auditions next week, meet with a magazine editor who wants me to do a piece for him, write next week's column for Showfax, finish my SAG Life Raft course proposal, send press releases to college and university drama professors for Self-Management for Actors, get early sales materials to SCB for both of our 2005 books, update Roxbury's website, read Blake's film script, contact the EIGHT actors waiting to hear back from me about career counseling (sheesh, I'm ashamed to have let that go so long while in Book Mode), figure out whether I can do anything social (Faith's bridal shower, rockstar karaoke, ARK benefit BINGO, Eric's LA memorial service, wrap party for the last film I cast, hanging with a friend who's in town for a graduate showcase, another friend's acting class visit), and maybe--just maybe--catch up on at-home admin stuff like paying bills and cleaning the kitchen.

Okay... now I'm depressed, overwhelmed, and exhausted. Can I just go outside and play? Pretty please?

Posted by bonnie at 10:53 AM

April 18, 2005

And... They're OFF!

Paul Revere had his Midnight Run. Mine was to Kinko's. And $109 (and 40 minutes) later, the typeset book was copied thrice for my Queens of Style (Courtney, Nini, and Robin), who will now give the book the once-over.

Meanwhile, I'll continue culling quotes for the What Others Are Saying section and busting ass to get the manuscript fully, accurately indexed (now that it's been put into the publishing software).

*contented sigh* (but a brief one, as I can't really stop work just yet)

I did take a break long enough to sleep for four hours and take this quiz. Seeing as I've never seen The OC, I have no idea what these results mean. But hey, the chick is hot, yo.

You scored as Julie. You are obsessed with status and prestige because you are invested in what other people think. Learn to find happiness by figuring out (and pursuing) your own internal desires instead of society's. What OC character are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Huge big yay for Ali, who got the all-clear at the doctor today! Woo hoo! And, again, yay!

Finally, I really really really want a photo of me done up Comic Book ala PhotoShop style. That's just way effin' cool.

Pff. Like I need another project!

Did I mention I start casting two films next week? ACK!

Oh, one more thing. Is it weirder to encounter someone (who you KNOW reads your blog) who asks, "So, what's new?" or to encounter someone (who you are certain doesn't even know you have a blog) who quotes your blog to you?

Posted by bonnie at 11:59 AM

April 12, 2005

No Time To Blog

Until the book is in the printer's hands, I have no time to blog. So...

...'til I can steal another moment away, I'll tell yaz that you must read this stuff:

Courtney Spies (about her life as a copy editor)
This Is This (another brilliant haiku from Cliff)
Boom Boom Beautiful (about Def Jam Becca MC and her cute kids)

Enjoy!

Oh, and huge thanks to Julie for the photos of the hummingbird momma. This is exactly what it looked like! Thanks!

Back to work. Happy Mercury-Direct, y'all!

Oh, PS--I am still totally blissed out from the spa weekend and my skin is simply divine! So so so so so glad I went! Love these long-lasting after-effects of self-indulgence.

Posted by bonnie at 9:51 AM

April 5, 2005

I Love You, Pink Dot

I love you, Pink Dot. You take care of me. You come over and bring me things like a yummy salad with fresh avocado, boiled egg whites, crispy bacon, and ripe tomatoes. Yum!

I thank you for making me take a short break in the editing process for only a $3.50 delivery fee.

Watching these actors "take a moment" before shooting an emotional scene on The Starlet* makes me laugh, considering I have now transcribed a book full of interviews in which actors talk about how no one has time for that sort of thing, once you're on the set.

Oh, and while we're on the TV topic... there is nothing to make me miss Cowboy Hootie more than the return of the plastic-faced king on the BK commercials. *shudder* And, in the "God Bless America" files, there's a commercial in which an anti-depressant is touted as having "no sexual side-effects" about a dozen times. The speed-reader doing the "small print" info talks about one of the drug's side effects being attempts at suicide. Back to silky voiceover: NO SEXUAL SIDE-EFFECTS. *tsk* *tsk* What do we value, here? Don't worry, silly. You can still have sex. Right up 'til you off yourself! Eesh.

I've managed to get some irritant into each eye over the course of two days. Keith says the Santa Anas and the heat are what makes me more likely to feel such things. I, of course, am certain it's more fuel to derail my timeline for having the book to the printer. In fact, I'm brilliant. Tonight's eye irritant: Lady Speed Stick. How did I manage to get a fleck of deodorant into my eye? TALENT.

Oh, my. Just saw an OnStar commercial in which the kids make you feel like you're a PARENT WHO DOESN'T CARE ENOUGH TO KEEP THEM SAFE if you drive a car without OnStar.

Do you SEE why I never watch TV unless the show is TiVoed? Ugh.

Okay, break's over. Back to work.

* = Vivica... you should know what you just critiqued in that poor girl's scene is an EDITING issue of tightening up... NOT an actor issue. Faye... are you KIDDING me? Did you just tell that girl that she couldn't have had fun doing a dramatic scene? WTF?!? Ugh. No one who heard me on KROQ in 1993 doubts how I feel about you, Faye, but you're way off on this. Ugh. I'm glad I didn't follow this show.

Posted by bonnie at 9:10 PM

April 1, 2005

20 Hours Computer-Free

I turned off my computer 20 hours ago. I slept for six hours and here's what I did-slash-observed during the other 14. (Note: I did not get any phone calls returned. *sigh*)

1. Dined out for breakfast with my lover. His treat!

2. Did a casting workshop at AFTRA and saw 30 really great actors in just 90 minutes. Very cool!

3.

4. Bought gluten-free groceries, toiletries (also gluten-free, I guess), and pretty flowers (was charged twice for those... grr).

5. Bought clothing items, shoes, and handbags originally totalling $254 for a whopping $100.01. I'm a very good bargain shopper. I now have a very cute spa weekend wardrobe.

6. Spent about a half-hour in quiet contemplation about the book's contents and felt very, very proud. Also very grateful to my wonderful proofer patrol. What amazing friends I have!

7. Got a jumpstart on next-next week's column, as that one will be due while I'm at the spa! (Have I mentioned I'm excited that I'm going to have a spa weekend?)

8. Sang along with the cool new radio station, lauging at people driving in such a very hectic manner in these wonky Mercury-Retrograde days. *tsk* *tsk* Don't you know better? Just take your time.

9. Noticed my fingernails are amazingly healthy--proof that this gluten-free lifestyle is very good for me. Oh, and I haven't had a migraine since going gluten-free, despite enduring some very typically migraine-enducing conditions. Yay!

10. Reflected on my visit to LMU and how bizarre it was to have a student quote me (from my second book, which is their class' textbook).

11. Sent happy good vibes to Keith, who had his THIRD pilot season audition for Liberman/Patton today. Rockstar!

Posted by bonnie at 5:57 PM

March 21, 2005

Strange Dream

Keith said I was sleeping like he'd never seen when he left for his producer session this morning (CSI:NY). [Note: he also went in AGAIN for The Shield. Rockstar.]

The dream I must've been having had elements of standing in line at a foreign airport with my mother*, trying to get home to LA. [*]

From a cool site recommended by Ames:

To dream of a foreign place or country suggests that the realization of your heart's desire is closer than you imagine. Persevere and have patience! The general image of "mother" in a dream may symbolize a variety of feelings and ideas: caring, nurturing, love, acceptance, hard work, sacrifice, etc. The mother in your dream could also represent that force, or current, inside of you that nudges you on and inspires you. It is your intuition and the knowledge that lives deep within your soul. To dream that you are standing in line indicates your need for patience. You should be prepared to wait for something and not have it right away. If you spoke with someone who is dead, you will soon hear very good news.

Hm.

Posted by bonnie at 4:37 PM

March 15, 2005

Am I Blogging Every Day?

I think I am.

How much do I love that my friends are blogging with one another now? A lot!

You scored as atari 2600.
What rare toy classic are you?created with QuizFarm.com

I won't share my results from the What religion are you? quiz, but I will share that I scored 50% or above in Paganism, Judaism, Buddhism, Satanism, and Islam. Yeah. That seems about right.

Oh! Scheduled another speaking engagement. Dang, I'm a busy bee. 3/28: LMU, 4/1: AFTRA, 4/2: CAA, and of course 4/5 is HHH. Very cool! And... *beaming* Keith went to producers AGAIN with L/P (this time for Medium). I'm so dang proud of my actor baby!

Also proud of my Ladies of the Gimlet who have done very brave and wonderful, grownup things. Isn't it fun how the universe pretty much INSTANTLY rewards such courage? Yes!

Posted by bonnie at 1:39 AM

March 12, 2005

Listy Stuff

1. Gimlet Night rocks. We should do it more often. We planned this one at our last one and at this one we talked about another gathering coming up here soon... this could become a rich tradition. (BTW, all boys think we have Gimlet Night in sexy, girlie, pillow-fight attire. I can neither confirm nor deny.)

2. Cousin is wearing this in three months:

Yes, she is a goddess. Yes, she will rock this dress. Turns out, she is on someone's 50 Most Gorgeous People list. Indeed.

3.

4. Michelle had work drama happening. Bless her bones. I do believe that this week will launch her into greatness. It's just gonna take some deep breathing 'til then.

5. I've misquoted the above-mentioned Michelle in my random signature file thingy in Entourage. She's going to correct the quote about non-denominational services in the DWF airport soon. Yay!

6. We have successfully trained Thwok not to eat flowers. Oh, but she was totally antisocial tonight. Brat.

7. Faith thinks Archie is Angus.

8. It seems there is a perception that my home is clean. That makes me very happy. I like to have a clean home. Of course, when Faith asked, "What are all those NOTES over there?" we laughed. Those "notes" are headshots. Bins and bins of headshots. Yeah. We get those sometimes.

9. Everyone enjoyed the "What Were You THINKING" folder. That's all I can say about that. Watch for some random anonymous blog on the subject at some later date. Enough said.

10. Taxes are done. We came out of there spending less than a grand (thank goodness) and this year we didn't file extensions. It's fun to be done.

Oooooh... rhymie!

Posted by bonnie at 1:43 AM

March 10, 2005

It Takes a Village

For those with more energy than I seem to have...

...Chip is renovating his kitchen. Go read the entry linked to the image above (and at least the two more recent entries) and weigh in.

I personally voted for a 90210 theme, wherein each cabinet door is a different Bev-Niner's portrait, but I think I'm being voted down in favor of some pretty solids from the Martha Stewart Collection.

Posted by bonnie at 5:27 PM

Exhausted

I'm sooooooo wiped out. It's good though. I need a nap.

Click for big.

Like that. Yeah. Archie's got the right idea. What a day!

Posted by bonnie at 5:09 PM

March 9, 2005

Zoned Out

Okay, I'm seriously zoned out now.

I've just spent eight hours straight doing taxes. That's a lot of paper. I still have much to do. But sleep... that's the deduction I'm taking right now.

Posted by bonnie at 4:00 AM

March 7, 2005

Two Things

Based on this free weekend, if I actually subscribed to Showtime, I would overdose on decent-to-so-so movies and behind-the-scenes yummies.

We'll be buying Reefer Madness on DVD just based on the BTS yummy. (Ooh, or can we? It look like it may be a Showtime-only thingy. Damn! Is THIS how they get subscribers? Ack!)

Anyway... second thing... my head HOITS. Ow. Stop that!

Posted by bonnie at 1:54 AM

March 4, 2005

This and That

"Look at this. Look at that. Now it's time to sit and chat. About this. About that. It's This and That with Rusty!"

So, I still haven't taken Jodi's quizzes. Maybe when I've run out of ways to stall doing taxes. Did you know that corporate taxes are due a WHOLE MONTH earlier than normal-people taxes? Ugh. Much to do this weekend (and it all involves a calculator). Can I party or what?

Keith's birthday was delightful. He baked his yearly cake and frosted it with stuff that I'm allowed to stick my finger in [Gosh, that reads so dirty!!] (as it's the only gluten-free part of the cake). Took him out to dinner. Sang quietly. His presents should arrive tomorrow. :\ Dang "business days" for shipping counts online.

Just saw a commercial for Ice Princess. I bet Kris is in heaven! LOL Oh, safe travels, Kris! Hurry home safe.

Speaking of Kris, we just announced the lineup for the April 5th Hollywood Happy Hour. Visit the site, RSVP for the event, the usual. Yay!

I got soooooo much work done on the book today (all of the bios). Sheesh! It was amazing. I knew, once I hit a stride, I'd impress even myself with the amount I accomplished. Last night, I tackled site updates for the book, so that we can start presales. Woo hoo! Huge shout out to helper-types who received content today. Thank you in advance to ALL book helpers for rocking my world (I won't out you unless you want me to do so--you'll just get a non-specific major thank you in the credits of the book itself until I hear you prefer public praise)!

Keith has jury duty in the ayem. Hope he has at least as much fun as I did, back when I went a couple of years ago.

Had to cut my nails short tonight. :( So sad. They had grown so long and pretty. Well, 20 hours of typing 80 WPM will get you clear on priorities, that's all I've got to say.

I think I feel some sleepies coming on. Cool. We'll try that. It's always fun to crash a bit after so many hours of "this and that." Tee hee.

Posted by bonnie at 2:26 AM

March 3, 2005

Today's Lessons

There are people who only care about me to the extent that I can give them something. Once I have run out of what I've been giving them, I am no longer cared for and am, in fact, worthy of ridicule.

Learning this (and yes, I've learned it before, with different people) is a lovely "friendship clearinghouse" of sorts. There is something incredibly liberating about giving people the room to show me who they truly are.

...and then letting them go.

It is fascinating to me how the universe works. The INSTANT I let go of someone like this, I am contacted by someone "a tier above" (someone whose peer I aspire to be), inviting me further into that world.

There is something delicious about instant validation from the universe. It's a spiritual, "Right on, sister!" like no other.

I accept.

Posted by bonnie at 10:35 AM

March 1, 2005

Amazing, that darn RACE

I love this damn show.

The Amazing Race 7 kicked off tonight.

If I'm going to cry every time Uchena & Joyce talk about their aching need to have a baby and every time Ron talks about his experiences as a POW, this is going to be a long season for good ol' emotional me.

I'm also fascinated by the fluent-in-Portuguese-country-boy. Wow! Most folks I know who speak English like he does don't speak much of anything else. Completamente impressive, senhor!

Posted by bonnie at 11:38 PM

February 28, 2005

Okay, so...

...there were Oscars. I cried. The usual.

I'm such a pansy-ass where award shows are concerned. I seriously BAWL watching all of these people live their dreams. Fairy Godmother Syndrome or what?!?

Since I didn't do any of the ongoing catty-commentary stuff that I love so much, I'm sending folks to the home of the Couch Potato Corner for a really nice roundup of the awards.

Read Kris' number 23 and imagine me saying EXACTLY what she wrote. It's a little creepy.

What else?

Huge shoutout to Hamil, who is currently my Photoshop hero.

Kitties... they're all on crack. I blame the moon.

Lots of analysis about enjoying childhood well into adulthood today. I see no reason NOT to enjoy the silly things. The non-silly things are there, whether we focus on them or not. So why on Earth would I choose to focus on them for any longer than I must, in order to live as an adult?

Point is... some stuff is just funny. As it should be. Snort-laugh giggle fits are highly underrated.

Oh, and I have AGAIN adjusted comments on the site in an attempt to make commenting easier for my visitors. Please try 'em out. And spammers be damned! I love my commenters more than I hate spam. So be it!

Posted by bonnie at 12:12 AM

February 26, 2005

What a Beautiful Day!

It's just seriously gorgeous out. Wow. I love days like today. Windows open, kids playing, ocean breeze coming through and making me happy to be alive.

A full day of America's Next Top Model 3 on VH-1, a great new column to write (got lots of email on last week's column, which makes me happy), a ton of work to do on the book and a couple of egos to soothe (God, it's a delightful reminder of how far I've come when I'm the MOST sane one on the block sometimes), and Keith is currently auditioning at Lieberman/Patton for a pilot. Seriously, his new manager ROCKS. He's going out all the freeeekin' time. I love it!

Thwok has decided that all things plastic are also all things delicious. She keeps coming around the corner with little bits of plastic hanging from her mouth, a little grin (if that's possible). What a brat! I love her so!

Looks like no-go on the big Oscar party this year. Just way too much going on. How sad is that?!? Oh, well. I'm in my SEVEN year, which is very "inside." I'm feeling that. No doubt.

Okay... back to work! I remember (eventually) clicking into BOOK MODE for Self-Management for Actors and just FLYING through the writing process. It's time for that to happen with Acting Qs. I have so much to do... and TWO books coming out this year. Yeah. No more dilly-dally, silly-sally.

(I realize it can't be dilly-dallying when you've actually been casting a frickin' movie instead of writing a book for two weeks, but I've always felt that any time not spent working on something--even if it's due to the fact that I'm working on something ELSE--is time off somehow. Yes, I'm less sane at the end of this entry than I tried to come off at the start. Ugh. Where's the end of this parenthetical? Ah... here it is!)

Posted by bonnie at 1:39 PM

February 25, 2005

Many Things

1. There is such a thing as too much tequila. Ow.

2. Constance may have less of a hangover than I do. I know Keith and Liz are safe. Bob is definitely used to this sort of thing. It seems I do the Major Drunken Bender once a year or so. I think I'm set 'til about 2008.

3.

4. Took some quizzes.

You Are a Chihuahua Puppy

Small, high strung, and loyal. You do best in the city with adults. Young kids could crush you!

What Breed of Puppy Are You?

That one was from High Energy Jenny (I think that's what they call her).

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Third Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Very High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Moderate
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)	High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	High

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

And that one was from Chip.

5. I understand (via email) that some folks are having trouble with COMMENTS at the BonBlogs again. Grr. I thought I fixed things when I stopped requiring an email address at sign-in via TypeKey. Chip? Something in the settings? I don't want to make potential commenters sad.

6. And the last item... I think I finally found an iPod I'd actually buy. Thanks, Chip!

Posted by bonnie at 12:19 AM

February 14, 2005

It's Valentine's Day!

So, it's Valentine's Day, which is pretty ho-hum. Except that this year we're going to brave the wilds of the local trendiati and explore gluten-free vodkas at my favorite martini bar.

Voda is just under a mile from the homestead, which rocks. I love a good stagger home. Of course, can't go all out, seeing as we're interviewing TES on TuES. Also, since leaving gluten behind, I love booze a whole lot less. I have theories... but no time to blog about them. Must get back to scheduling auditions for the film.

Y'know what's fun? Asking for submissions to match a certain TYPE of actor (star name) and having that actor submitted on the project. "Oh, you want a so-and-so TYPE? How about so-and-so herself?!?" Um... yeah. Okay! Yay, us!

Posted by bonnie at 1:02 AM

February 13, 2005

TV, TiVo, and Thwok

Generally, Inside the Actors Studio is heavy on the pretention and that's something I don't prefer in my Hollywood breakfast cereal.

That said, Jamie Foxx keeps rocking my world, and his appearance on this show didn't disappoint. Seriously crazy about him. Wish he'd gone to the BAFTAs instead of to Clive Davis' Grammy party, but hey... he's gotta think about next year's career, I'm sure.

Also on the TiVo...

Bob... I love ya, man, but that Rodney show is dreck. Thank goodness my TiVo grabs you when you're schmacting on NYPD Blue and That '70s Show!

And finally... there's hope for me yet. Sure, I gave Thwok an email address (and later recalled that I'd already given Archie and Salema a Friendster account, so I'm NOT the bad mom I thought I was, favoring the animals differently), but it's sooooo cool to see Thwok getting fan mail! Tee hee.

Posted by bonnie at 7:09 PM

February 12, 2005

Cool Stuff from Across the Pond

So, I was going back through some COMMENTS links to see who has been commenting at the BonBlogs and what their sites look like and all of that and came across this guy named Cliff who posted a comment back in October from the UK.

I spend a little time at his site and find what might be one of the most brilliant short entries ever. It's about this place:

Oi! Bagel.

Here's what Cliff says on the subject:

There is a place open by me called "Oi Bagel".

This seems a little stereo typical, seeing as bagels are associated with Jewish communities and Jewish people are seen to say "oi" a lot as an exclamation of dismay. I got to thinking about "Yo Sushi" and wondered if it was so called because Japanese people said "yo" a lot.

What about:
Eh Pancakes
Right So Stews
*nonchalant shrug* Croissants
Cheers Fish and Chips

I think it's somewhere in the "Right So Stews"/"*nonchalant shrug* Croissants" area that I really fell in love with that list.

Oh, and he gave me a quiz to take! Yay!

You scored as Summer. You are SUMMER. Life is to be -lived-.. dance, sing, and make merry. Adversity is simply something to overcome. You embrace life with both arms, not only because you love it, but to squeeze out of it all that you can.

What Season Are You?
created with QuizFarm.com

Much fun! It's like I'm honoring the Hollywood-UK weekend (BAFTAs, y'know). Cool.

Posted by bonnie at 5:36 PM

February 11, 2005

Wrap-up

Today was good. I'm still on some sort of really whacked out sleep cycle (mostly due to avoidance-of-symptoms desires on my part as well as odd reactions to various attempts at self-medicating and whatnot) but I was able to tackle the first round of serious submissions for the film.

I'm lacking in the area of ACHAK (18-year-old Native American male character) submissions, but I spent about seven hours pouring through my master files and found a few guys who I know could book the role today, so I'm less nervous about specific submissions. I can call these guys in and even make straight offers, if we have to resort to that.

In other news, it was the second anniversary of Keith's mom's death, so that meant a lot of caretaking and checking in and other such stuff. I wouldn't have had a clue how to deal with this, had I not gone through it all myself. Definitely, passing the two-year mark seems to help. It's like this:

YEAR ONE: 1/2 numb, 1/2 zombie-coping
YEAR TWO: 1/4 numb, 1/4 zombie-coping, 1/4 back to normal, and 1/4 sad that anything so sad could ever begin feeling less sad
YEAR THREE: 1/2 back to normal, 1/8 angry, 1/8 ready to move on, 1/8 respectful of the hole that never goes away, 1/8 sad that there is a hole and that there once was not
YEAR FOUR: 3/4 back to a new kind of normal--one with a layer of sad and angry and lonely built in, 1/4 respectful of the hole that never goes away

It is my hope that, in year five, that respect for the hole that never goes away becomes a part of that new kind of normal. Right now, what is hardest for me is the beginning to forget-slash-the never having asked about things that weren't relevant to the gal in her 20s but that are absolutely important to me now... and I can't find out whether they were important to Mom.

Ugh. There comes some of that sad stuff again.

*sigh*

Okay, so in other, other news...

Thwok brings me joy every single day. She flops down, exposes her belly, tucks her chin under, and rolls rolls rolls. I babytalk to her the way my Mom would babytalk Archie and Salema and Muffy before them (and me before that, my brothers before me, etc.). And every time I see her little belly, I say, "I so love you!"

Then I think of my sis Deb who brought Thwok into my life and who is also facing an anniversary (her mother died while Deb and Ash were with me for Perfect auditions last year). I quietly send a prayer, a whisper, a vibe, an open-valve stream of energy to everyone who needs a spiritual hug and am happy that something weighing less than five pounds with a chirpy little purr can inspire me in such giving ways.

I then send all that love to fellow Motherless Daughters Ali, Dawn, and Faith, as well as others who float in and out of my head as I smile in the same way I smile at the sight of a hummingbird.

As much as I'd like to keep at all of this, I have audition appointments to schedule. Bless sweet little Shauna for being my casting assistant AGAIN. She's seriously good people--and VERY good at this job, should she ever care to pursue it.

OH! This just in: Aleta, wherever you bought that flourless pistachio cake has my business FOREVER. I'm STILL in heaven over that yummy goodie you brought over!!!!! WOW! Can't wait to try the flourless almond cake! You are so thoughtful! Thank you!

Posted by bonnie at 1:02 AM

February 5, 2005

Silliness Before I Get Back To Work

Nabbed from Chipperdoodle:

You are KERMIT!

Interesting, considering the layst time I took this test (nearly three years ago), I was Fozzie. So, is the quizaverse saying I've changed?

Oh, and in deep conversation with the greatness that is Shauna (while sorting headshots for the past two days--THANK YOU), I learned that one of the stars of Desperate Housewives will be coming out next week on the cover of The Advocate. No idea who, but I can just say, if it's Marcia Cross, she had better do some serious back-pedalling from all of the, "I sooooo want a man," she was spouting off on Oprah recently. And if it's Eva Longoria?

Sign. Me. Up.

Oh, BTW, still have never seen an episode. Heh.

Oooh, look... red carpet for the SAG Awards! Man, I loves me some E! Perfect for writing this week's column.

Note to Star Jones: tell the booth to keep you on a tighter shot. I can count the ribs in your corset and you clearly rode over in the limo in this dress. Can't they steam out those wrinkles before you hit the air? Dayum... catty much, Bon? Hee!

Posted by bonnie at 1:51 PM

January 21, 2005

Friday Night Items

Item One:

Awesome friend-for-21-years goes in for the lead in a pilot. Exec prod? Awesome other friend-for-19-years. What do they talk about? Me. How do I know? Phone call. "Just wanted to let you know how much you are loved in this town."

LOVE THAT.

Item Two:

Day one of Pilates feels like light yoga. Day two of Pilates feels like rack torture. And it's a delicious feeling! Thing is... it continues to feel like that ALL DAY LONG. Wow. Cool.

Item Three:

There is no three.

Item Four:

Aunt Cindy bought Thwok four of these when we moved to Santa Monica. They have all been hidden after hours and hours and hours of play. We're just so glad she loves them. Loves loves LOVES playing fetch with them. Tosses them up in the air for herself and bats them down with a paw, pounces on them, then carries them away in her mouth. Aww. Sweet. So... Keith bought her another five of these for Thanksgiving (or so). They have all been hidden after hours and hours and hours of play. We're glad she loves them... but where the hell have NINE of these things gone? Keith bought her ANOTHER set of these things (a dozen this time) before he left for NoCal. I'm NOT giving them ALL to her. Two so far. Where are they? With the other nine. Somewhere.

WHERE THE HELL IS SHE HIDING THESE THINGS?

And when on earth will we find them? Or will we?

Item Five:

Another rockstar interview for the book today. And the super-secret one we're not talking about until after it is DONE is really super-effin'-fantastic on sooooooo many levels.

I. Am. Loving. 2005.

Eeeeeeeeeeee!

Posted by bonnie at 11:46 PM

Brr.

Okay, so after a week of 80-degree-temps, I'm sitting in my apartment and suddenly (WAY suddenly), I'm FREEZING.

I look outside and what do I see? NOTHING. The fog has rolled in from the ocean down the way and--holy crap--it's just COLD.

Check out the Pier Cam to watch it roll on in!

Cool.

Posted by bonnie at 3:49 PM

January 20, 2005

Extra-Bloggy Today

So, I'm just writing it all up, eh?

Last night, Keith and I had a romantic date at PF Chang's. They have a gluten-free menu. Holy bejeebus, was that food GOOD! I had no idea gluten-free could taste SO good! Nice job, PF Chang's. I've written a letter. Gotta support those good people who take care of us with a smile.

Meanwhile, I keep getting inadvertent gluten. Grr. Mild headaches, as I have a very quick reaction to the gluten, so I can make sure to "fix it" with lots of water before the symptoms get out of hand.

Ah... and while Keith is at a pro basketball game (and will be courtside, if you want to tune to TNT to see him with his sister), I have successfully done my Pilates for the night. Woo hoo!

Every little bit, baby!

Posted by bonnie at 7:23 PM

January 3, 2005

Absolutely Breathtaking

The sun is setting a few blocks from here (over that big pool called the Pacific Ocean) and there is a lovely pink-orange-yellow hue to the sky right above the water. Above that, the sky is purple-blue-grey with a haunting storm rolling in. Lightning keeps cracking through the dark sky into the light sky above the water. The wind is picking up.

Simply gorgeous.

Posted by bonnie at 4:54 PM

January 1, 2005

Before Sunrise Musings

Okay, so I was asleep by 11pm. Told Keith to wake me up at Midnight for a kiss, because they say whatever you're doing at the stroke of Midnight you'll be doing all year. That was fun, even though I was groggy. Keith had spanked me at Scrabble TWICE before I called it a night. The unfinished bottle of champagne was taken outside for the local homeless to celebrate with.

There were two awesome New Year's Eve parties I skipped. Nelson had a great idea: celebrate the East Coast New Year with a party that starts at 7pm, ends at 10pm PST. That way, everyone is home and safe before the roads get really crazy with drunk drivers. Deb's NYE party was also of the birthday variety. Love my New Year Birthday Baby! Sorry I missed getting to spank you, sweetheart. ;)

Withdrawal is way icky. Upset tummy, swollen hands and feet, aches, odd sleep cycles, and as a bonus: a HUGE sore on my lip. Lovely. No wonder I didn't want to go out last night. Ugh. Keith wanted to order pizza. I told him that I was way supportive of his "normal" diet while I'm doing my new thing, but that *might* be crossing the line with just six days of success under my belt. More ugh. I'm just crabby this morning. Got up at 4am and kept trying to NOT be up yet. That just gets annoying.

Oh, so, as I'm flipping around the DirecTV guide, looking for what to watch, I notice that my lovely Trio is no more. WHAT? Didn't we JUST save Trio from a DirecTV dump in 2003? Why yes, yes we did! WTF?!? Well, the Save Trio email form for DirecTV subscribers remains on the Trio site, but things look pretty grim for the network altogether. Ah. The same dingus-filled corporation that cancelled Faith's brilliant show is at the helm? Well... there ya go.

I'm hungry. *sigh*

Posted by bonnie at 5:25 AM

December 31, 2004

Chase This

From my friend Jo-D at Somesuch:

Chase Credit Card sucks much ass. They couldn't even name the credit report that caused my APR to jump from 7.99% to 28.99% (yes, credit report, not my Chase credit history).

My response to Jo-D:

They're doing it to everybody. Mine went from 7.99% to 23.99% with no warning, no notice, no word as to why.

My move?

Pay that sucker off and close it. Fuck y'all.

Satisfied customer since 1997 my ass.

Ho damn ho.

When I called, the CSR immediately escalated my call to a supervisor who offered to match the lowest card rate I currently have: 7.99% fixed for life. No, thanks. Then she offered to increase my credit limit. No, thanks.

That felt good.

I encourage everyone to say goodbye to a creditor. It's fun.

Posted by bonnie at 4:50 PM

December 29, 2004

I Love My Life

Truly.

I'm sitting here, having cleaned the apartment, organized my files, prepped the new book materials that were in 20 different places, charged the SixHundy, played with the kitten-who's-becoming-a-cat, wrote out another dozen holiday cards, and comforted Keith when he woke up from a bad dream. That's a good few hours, even in the middle of the night.

I'm sleepy now. Good.

Tomorrow, two lovely young actors will come over for career consultation services and I'll be able to prep them for a general they have coming up next week. I love that I can earn money from home. What a wonderful life!

There are a few more holiday gatherings afoot and I'm not sure how I feel about going to them, at this point. Have to wait and see, I s'pose.

Ooh... I think there's a bed calling my name. Luckily, it's really closeby.

Posted by bonnie at 4:23 AM

December 20, 2004

Okay, I THINK...

...I'm finally ready to try to get some sleep.

THREE book interviews in a few hours. So frickin' excited. I swear, this book already rocks.

Oh, and speaking of rocking books... there are only 400 or so copies of Self-Management for Actors left in our warehouse! Time to do the second edition. Hell, if the casting director strike goes through, I'll be in book mode for two books, back-to-back.

Yowza!

Anyone have any recommendations for how to keep my hands (joints, knuckles, wrists) from aching so, as I do all of this keyboard work? Yes, I have awesome wrist wraps that I use and I tried the whole glucosamine/MSM combo too. Still, I'm up for suggestions for keeping it all "feeling good" while rolling.

Oh, I like the Sakitini with the Ginger Sprig garnish at Sushi Roku. Happy Hour is a good thing there... such a lovely view.

Okay, much work to do in a few hours and I do want some sleep. Wish me luck!

LOVE my life. Seriously. What a gratifying year this has been. Rockstar.

Posted by bonnie at 5:25 AM

December 16, 2004

Great Evening

Walked to the bank and market, hung Christmas lights in the window, now watching A Charlie Brown Christmas. Kitties are doped up on Cosmic Catnip and all is right with the world.

Posted by bonnie at 8:07 PM

November 29, 2004

Misc.

Not a lot to say, it would seem from the lack of recent entries, eh?

I've been sick, which is a bummer. I guess it's good it's not the SICK-sick kind of sick that people get where they have to stay in bed all day and blah blah blah. I'm just the very silly, low-grade kind of sick where my nose is red from all of the blowing of it and my throat is sore from sleeping with my mouth open in order to breathe. Annoying little cold. That's all. Just bleh. Not fun.

Got lots of family phone calls in yesterday, which was good. It was good to catch up and get some lovin', southern-accent style. ;)

We've actually had the heat on in the living room on for only about two hours a day every day since the 24th. Today... it's been on alllll day. Brr.

Thursday is happy new sofa day. I'm seriously giddy over it. I can't wait!

Tomorrow night is the casting director panel at LMU. I'm looking forward to seeing my CD friends and getting to share all sorts of good info with actors. Should be a packed house. Gonna rock.

Oh, man... I get emails every day from the actors who read my weekly column over at Showfax.com. Today I got the most YOU JUST DON'T FREEEEEKIN' GET IT email I've ever received. I wrote a whole piece on how proactive and self-reliant actors need to be. I gave examples of things actors could do to take charge of their careers and not wait for agents to get them auditions. Augh. I won't say what the email said exactly... but it was... well... "help me be self-sufficient." Jesus! Isn't that what I've done EVERY WEEK and in my books?

Oh, hey... as I'm typing this I just realized what I'm going to do. I'm not going to roll my eyes at this kid and make fun of the situation. I'm going to invite this actor to the LMU panel. Maybe the actor will learn THERE (both in content and from attending the panel itself) what being proactive is about.

I love it when writing helps me figure out something. LOVE it!

Our time with David was great. Loved having him here for four days. And it was such a blast to get to share so much of the holiday weekend with friends. David, Etta, Gabe, Suesie and family, Tracy, Dick, Aleta... just a great long weekend, start-to-finish.

Sniffles excluded, of course.

Okay, back to work. We have callbacks on Saturday. Very excited!!

Posted by bonnie at 2:25 PM

November 21, 2004

Here's Why I Love Gimlet Night

We talk about boys and sex and makeup and home-ownership and work and feminism and politics and fashion and music and movies and pro sports idiots and travel and color schemes and relationships and religion and cars and literature and animals and family and and and... it's just wonderful. I LOVE Gimlet Night!!

This time around, Dawn brought (for Show and Tell) a Seventeen Magazine. She'd picked it up while in Mammoth, as she likes to keep tabs on the messages young women are getting from the media about how they should be. Well, she reminded us of the huge "moment" in our lives (in the '80s) when "Sex and Your Body" (a monthly column in the magazine) premiered. This was pre-AIDS "How To Avoid Getting a VD" type stuff, but it introduced us to an era of being comfortable talking frankly about sex and our bodies.

She opened the magazine to find this section.

But couldn't find it.

Where had it gone?

What's this...? A new section. It's not a subsection of some other heading. It's not alongside more "body-oriented" pieces. It's a few pages devoted to the section heading: FAITH. [A Detroit News article on this recent happening is here.]

The American Family Association runs an article in which the EIC of the magazine (with a year on the job, at this point) says, "I don't know that it is very sexually-oriented," [Atoosa] Rubenstein said of the magazine, in general. "We have, in the health section, a sex-health page. We don't necessarily do it every month..."

WHAT? Sex-health is no longer worth addressing MONTHLY in the ever-changing, hormonally-charged, emotionally-intense days of teenaged lives... but let's roll out a few pages for FAITH?

Believe me, I'm a big fan of FAITH (I'd love the section all the more if its interviews with young women included those of Pagan and Wiccan faith alongside all the blurbs from those of mainstream religions), but I'm also a fan of sexual health--especially among teenagers. I remember being a teenager. I doubt praying would've prevented me from contracting an STD. Luckily, I knew what actions WOULD prevent such a thing (oh, and they're now calling it an STI, rather than an STD). I worry for kids who today may not get a health tip that could save their lives until three months too late, since sex-health isn't "necessarily" done monthly anymore in Seventeen.

*shudder*

Shifting Gears

Auditions were great. Wonderful actors. Amazing prereads. Lots of improv and some really creative actors doing genuinely fantastic stuff. Some no-shows, as always, and these with some really grand excuses (oy... see next week's Showfax.com column to see how that plays out in print), but that's the holidays for ya!

Thrilled to have Tim and Verna say, as we wrapped today, "I would LOVE to be an actor auditioning for you. You are so GOOD to these actors. You make them feel so strong," and, "I'll write any testimonial you need. You are a terrific casting director and you showed us so much more talent than we anticipated seeing. We have a VERY tough job ahead of us. THANK you for making this weekend so great."

That rocked! Love hearing that! They absolutely adored Keith and thanked him (and Shauna, Saturday) for being such a great support system to the casting process. The lead actor (already cast) sat in on auditions and expressed today that he'd never seen any other actor audition before; that this experience had changed him deeply as an actor. [Note: This is why I always recommend that actors find a way to see auditions happening. It's SO educational!]

Callbacks will be announced soon. It is going to be tough, but as always, with casting... what a happy problem to have (so much talent from which to choose). Awesome weekend.

Oh...

Except that Keith's bike was stolen. Actually, our whole street got hit. Neighbors' bikes, Keith's bike... not mine, though (weird). The worst part is... it seems I may have heard the theif at work around 1:30am Friday. I was headed to bed and heard clicking and footsteps below our bedroom window. Thinking it might be a homeless person finding a warm cubby in which to sleep for the night, I didn't even think to look out the window. Of course, I don't know what I would've done (here, alone) had I looked and seen someone walking a bike out of the locked area (oh, yes, AREA locked and the bike was locked up too... all things cut and such--you know, pros have tools). Anyway, I'm having a hard time forgiving myself for not having done something about it. Once I put together the timeline (when Keith learned yesterday about the neighborhood hit), I just sank. I feel really bad. Of course, yesterday's Daily Word was "Forgiveness." *sigh* I'm working on it. Just hate getting hit in our new home. But it's a reminder that nowhere is a place where shit like this DOESN'T happen. That's just modern life, I guess.

Oh... speaking of modern life...

Is all of the sports-related violence going on this weekend somehow post-election anger? I just have no idea how it is that this stuff keeps happening. Testosterone is an ugly beast!

Okay... that's a lot of catching up for one post. Time to pull electronic photos of our top-picks from casting so that I can email the producers a Zip file of "reminders" to consult while they review the tapes.

Brr. It's cold. Like... 53 degrees! Brrrrrrrrrr. Winter!

One last thing... I keep forgetting to share this image here (it's been here awhile, but I didn't post it b/c I haven't bothered to edit it down smaller and the stylesheet for this blog will squeeze all weird if I don't edit it... and blah blah blah). Anyway, click here to see a map of the Blue/Red States vs. Free/Slave States pre-Civil War. *shudder*

Okay... am I shuddering so much due to how cold it is or is the world just a little extra "shuddery" this weekend? Don't answer that. I'm getting a blanket.

Posted by bonnie at 8:50 PM

November 19, 2004

Headed To Hollywood

First, yesterday's showcase ROCKED. Seriously rocked. Can't wait to blog about it in Shows I've Seen. Seriously good stuff!

Second, I cannot believe how little time it has taken for me to get "Santa Monica settled" about having to *ugh* drive all the way to Hollywood. Seriously... it's like I'm making a day trip or something! HOWL!

So, I'm headed to Hollywood for Gimlet Night with the lovely Ladies of the Gimlet (tee hee) at a fireplace-happy home, then two days of prereads for Trees Grow Tall and Then They Fall. Seriously, I may not come back to Santa Monica until late Sunday. That's how much I dislike the trek. Of course, I also dislike packing... so I'm making a "lesser of two evils" choice here in the next little bit. I'll either NOT pack and have to drive back to the beach after prereads tomorrow or I'll pack and stay "over there" in the 323.

Man, I'm twisted.

Okay, I sincerely hope prereads go fabulously well tomorrow. Thankfully, I have wonderful Dalt's Gang helpers which will make things go smoothly. It's just such a NEW genre for me! I love learning all of this.

And is Thanksgiving like a few days away? Wow. Where the hell did this year go? I'm so loving 2004. Rockstar year, as predicted. Can't wait for more delightfulness in 2005. Heck, with a trip to Scotland already on the books, it's looking pretty dang cool.

Oh, yeah! I won't take my laptop to Hollywood. I'll take a couple of scripts I've received (potential casting gigs). THAT's a great idea! Oh, goodie. See... the longer you type the more you CAN think of things to put in the PROS column of the Hollywood Haul List. Heeeeeeeee.

Gimlets, away!

Posted by bonnie at 4:50 PM

November 12, 2004

Catching Up

Here's some stuff that's been on my list.

1. I needed a backpack/laptop case for the trip I recently took (that cool casting gig for E! and Wayne Newton). Keith wanted me to buy some Apple-endorsed pack, but they were all way clunky and ugly and ick. I did a search to find the LOOK of one I was aiming for, just to show Keith the style, and actually found some way cool OGIO bags at not horrible prices. Thing is, all were only available for purchase online and I was leaving in like a day... no time for that. So, Keith finds the OGIO corporate website. Utah-based company. He calls them up and says he wants to buy locally in SoCal. The guy on the other end of the phone says, "Well, I can give you the number of our SoCal sales rep and you can call him to ask where you can buy a pack nearby." "Okay," Keith says, and he calls the guy. The number is his cell. Hey... he's coming to LA the next day and has a sample bag ("Hey, if you don't mind BROWN, I have the METRO bag here handy.") in his trunk and will bring it TO OUR HOME for $20 cash. Um... yeah. This bag retails at $99.99 and is really way cool. GO, KEITH!!! I sooo would've stopped at, "Oh... online only. Bummer." Not him! He got me a $100 bag for $20... delivered! Awesome.

2. Jonathan (my associate CD for the E! show) is also known as The Hertz Guy. If you visit his website here, you'll see the clip and realize you know him as that guy. Well, we needed a rental car for a few weeks while on the road and the production company was only going to cover a certain dollar amount. That's b/c they were hiring Jonathan as a local hire in ATL and that should've meant he came with a car for half of the trip. Anyway, since that wasn't the case, we needed a good deal. Enter Jonathan. He calls Hertz and says, "I'm that guy in the commercial." Hm. How can this POSSIBLY work out? Well... he does "the voice" for the guy on the phone and he cuts him like the biggest, fattest, serious employee-level discount there is... and upgrades us to a mid-size from mega-economy. Rock on!

3. There is no three.

4. Joni, my cousin who works at Delta, reviews my flight plan before I make my trip to NASH and ATL and back to LA. She says someone clearly doesn't like me, as I've been given seat 43E (last row, middle of the center section, lavatory-adjacent) on my four-hour flight home. Happy day... bump bump bump... I'm in 17B. Aisle. Close-up-front. And that handy-skinny-seat-partner... that was a bonus! Thanks, Joan!

5. While Jonathan and I were in Nashville, we happened upon a nightclub to scout music and found a really great band playing live. We wrote up a little note about where/when the lead singer should show up for an audition, if he were interested in the show, and we were just going to hand it off to the doorman who was so kind to let us in without the cover charge "to scout" and then the band's manager was pointed out to us. She was clearly not interested in being interrupted. On her cell phone out on the sidewalk... and I said to Jonathan, "Let me handle it." ;) Walked over, made eye contact... got her interested in a conversation and told her what our agenda was. Quickly, the cell phone call was over, we were all back in the nightclub, Jonathan and I each had a copy of the band's latest CD, and we each had a free drink in hand. Cooooooool.

6. What's the deal with the WB and its "FRESH" shows? Why aren't they "new episodes" on the WB? Why are they FRESH instead? Are we back in time or something. I'm so cornfused. Yes, the R was intentional.

7. Finally, and this is the good one... I've realized that 80% of all miscommunication is due to incorrect perception of intention. Think about it. I think you've wronged me. I'm upset. Turns out you wronged me only in as much as I perceived your intention to be dishonorable. If I reconsider your intention and realize you only meant something positive, even if I don't GET your intention (I don't buy it, I don't believe in it, I don't otherwise connect with you for what you've done), I at least have not miscommunicated with you. I GET you. I honor your intention. And that means, even if I don't agree with your intention, I at least GET you and we've communicated effectively. 80% of miscommunication comes from the lack of willingness to examine the true intention.

I think.

;)

Hee hee.

Bed.

Posted by bonnie at 1:00 AM

October 27, 2004

Time Warp

I've gone back in time. I'm in Atlanta and I've been in both my first neighborhood (Hapeville) and my second neighborhood (Sandy Springs) and everywhere in between. Tonight, Jonathan Spencer and I spoke at yourACT and after I dropped Jonathan home (inside the perimeter on Riverside Drive--so ITP to this OTP girl), I ventured south on Roswell Rd. just a tad and what did I find one mile from my hotel?

The Taco Stand. Wow. Athens has come to Atlanta. And I got to taste it.

The leaves are changing. October in Atlanta is one of my favorite things on the planet. So beautiful. Oh, if only the Braves were in the Series this year!

Oh, and in my Rainman Suite at the hotel, there's a spa tub the size of my kitchen back home. I never want to take a "normal" bath again. Ever. Seriously, I think I will only ever stay at Wingate Inns anymore.

Ahhhh. I'm having such a good time. I'm also eager to go home. That's like the best balance. It's before you start being so ready to get home that you're ignoring what a good time you're having and it's after you've been gone long enough that you really do miss home quite a bit.

Perfect. Yay.

Posted by bonnie at 7:43 PM

October 16, 2004

Many Things

Catching up on a few things before hittin' the road...

Sex

I've realized that I was too young to enjoy "Sex and the City" when it originally aired. I am JUST the right age to really love it now that it's on TBS. Excellent.

LASIK

One week post-op note: dry eyes, yes. And the antibiotic drops sting. The steroid drops leave a "drip" taste in the back of my throat. After the one-week checkup, I was able to stop those drops. Good. Because those drops gave me a little ring of white around my eyelids and made my eyelashes crispy.

Two weeks post-op note: I use Refresh Tears three times a day, as directed. I don't have any of the sting/drip issues with these drops, nor do I have the white ring around my eyelids anymore. My eyelashes are less crispy.

I can tell that I feel nervous touching my eyes. I don't want to rub them because just the pressure of using a makeup brush to apply eye shadow seems to "stress" the area that was cut during the surgery. So, I'm very careful with my eyes.

The best thing about not having contacts in is that I'm sure, if ever my eyes are irritated, that it can't be due to my contact sitting weirdly on my eye. I spent so much time trying to "re-place" the contacts on my eyes to be more comfortable that it's clear to me, just by how infrequently I need to touch my eyes now, that LASIK was a great idea for me.

Brilliance

Last night, as the house band played "Sweet Child o' Mine" (and quite well), the 23-year-old cutie next to me said, "Oh! I love this song. It makes me wish *I* grew up in the '60s."

Now... how am I supposed to keep a straight face when the prettiest girl in the room reveals herself to also be the dimmest? Ah... Hollywood.

Book

Blake and I did another interview today. It was great. Awesome. And we tossed around a great title that seems to keep floating in as a theme in our interviews: "Fuck 'em." There's a point in which actors are saying to us, in their interviews, that they just had to let go of what happens in auditions and figure, if they didn't get the role, "Fuck 'em. I'll get the next one." I doubt we'd be able to sell a book with that title, but it's certainly worth a mention here.

Off-the-Record

Those of you who recall the drama over at my former employer (a major publication for actors) will be amused to learn that I am officially NOT to be interviewed or consulted for material in its pages. That's all I can say.

This is nearly as funny as the time I was asked to edit a piece I'd "contributed" to their new book... a piece I hadn't been told I'd "contributed," one for which I wasn't paid, and one for which I may not even be credited... I haven't checked the book to be sure.

Such a great establishment, over there. Yes... it's lovely to value being RIGHT in a political pissing contest over sharing the best information for your readers. That is sooo the recipe for success. *eye roll*

Handshake Deal

Faith, who is exec producing a series for VH-1 and who will fly to NY next week to pitch a new show elsewhere, has agreed to exec produce my talk show, when that time comes. That was Keith's idea. Good idea, honey. You are my Steadman. Faith is my Gail. Cricket Feet is our Harpo Productions. What fun!

Packing

So, as I'm packing for the trip, Archie has decided he'd like to stay in my luggage. Part "the love of the box" and part "don't leave me" but very cute either way.

Computer Stuff

Keith is about to go meet the guy who is a sales rep for OGIO. He's going to sell us a sample laptop backpack from his stock for $20 so that I can have a very stylish way to take my computer on the road without having both a clunky computer bag AND a purse. It'll be an all-in-one deal. Cool.

Also, got a very cool new toy. Yes... we bought the iSight web cam. This should be way fun. I'll make sure to post when you'll be able to sign onto Yahoo Messenger to watch the casting fun. Yippee! I love geeky toys! Yay!

I'll set it up after I take a nap. Definitely time for a nap. Ahhh. Love a day like this. When I get up, I'll do all of my Roxbury work, finish working on casting planning, and get more packing done. Yes, and set up the web cam. Heeeeeeee.

And now, for the fun geeky stuff that makes Kris crazy (sorry, gal).

The things I've done are in bold.

01. Bought everyone in the pub a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said 'I love you' and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Done a striptease
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise
15. Seen the Northern Lights
16. Gone to a huge sports game
17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19. Touched an iceberg
20. Slept under the stars
21. Changed a baby's diaper
22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
23. Watched a meteor shower
24. Gotten drunk on champagne
25. Given more than you can afford to charity
26. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
27. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
28. Had a food fight
29. Bet on a winning horse
30. Taken a sick day when you're not ill
31. Asked out a stranger
32. Had a snowball fight
33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier
34. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
35. Held a lamb
36. Enacted a favorite fantasy
37. Taken a midnight skinny dip
38. Taken an ice cold bath
39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
40. Seen a total eclipse
41. Ridden a roller coaster
42. Hit a home run
43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days
44. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
45. Adopted an accent for an entire day
46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
47. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
48. Had two hard drives for your computer
49. Visited all 50 states
50. Loved your job for all accounts
51. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
53. Had amazing friends
54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
55. Watched wild whales
56. Stolen a sign
57. Backpacked in Europe
58. Taken a road-trip
59. Rock climbing
60. Lied to foreign government's official in that country to avoid notice
61. Midnight walk on the beach
62. Sky diving
63. Visited Ireland
64. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
66. Visited Japan
67. Benchpressed your own weight
68. Milked a cow
69. Alphabetized your records
70. Pretended to be a superhero
71. Sung karaoke
72. Lounged around in bed all day
73. Posed nude in front of strangers
74. Scuba diving
75. Got it on to "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye
76. Kissed in the rain
77. Played in the mud
78. Played in the rain
79. Gone to a drive-in theater
80. Done something you should regret, but don't regret it
81. Visited the Great Wall of China
82. Discovered that someone who's not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog
83. Dropped Windows in favor of something better
84. Started a business
85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
86. Toured ancient sites
87. Taken a martial arts class
88. Swordfought for the honor of a woman
89. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
90. Gotten married
91. Been in a movie
92. Crashed a party
93. Loved someone you shouldn't have
94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy
95. Gotten divorced
96. Had sex at the office
97. Gone without food for 5 days
98. Made cookies from scratch
99. Won first prize in a costume contest
100. Ridden a gondola in Venice
101. Gotten a tattoo
102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on
103. Rafted the Snake River
104. Been on television news programs as an "expert"
105. Got flowers for no reason
106. Masturbated in a public place
107. Got so drunk you don't remember anything
108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug
109. Performed on stage
110. Been to Las Vegas
111. Recorded music
112. Eaten shark
113. Had a one-night stand
114. Gone to Thailand
115. Seen Siouxsie live
116. Bought a house
117. Been in a combat zone
118. Buried one/both of your parents
119. Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off
120. Been on a cruise ship
121. Spoken more than one language fluently
122. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
123. Bounced a check
124. Performed in Rocky Horror
125. Read - and understood - your credit report
126. Raised children
127. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy
128. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
129. Created and named your own constellation of stars
130. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
131. Found out something significant that your ancestors did
132. Called or written your Congress person
133. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
134. ...more than once
135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
136. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
137. Had an abortion or your female partner did
138. Had plastic surgery
139. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived
140. Wrote articles for a large publication
141. Lost over 100 pounds
142. Had a flashback
143. Piloted an airplane
144. Petted a stingray
145. Broken someone's heart
146. Helped an animal give birth
147. Been fired or laid off from a job
148. Won money on a TV game show
149. Broken a bone
150. Killed a human being
151. Gone on an African photo safari
152. Ridden a motorcycle
153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100mph
154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
155. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
157. Ridden a horse
158. Had major surgery
159. Had sex on a moving train
160. Had a snake as a pet
161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
162. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
164. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
165. Visited all 7 continents
166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
167. Eaten kangaroo meat
168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground
169. Been a sperm or egg donor
170. Eaten sushi
171. Had your picture in the newspaper
172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime
173. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
174. Gotten someone fired for their actions
175. Gone back to school
176. Parasailed
177. Changed your name
178. Petted a cockroach
179. Eaten fried green tomatoes
180. Read The Iliad
181. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school, and read
182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them
183. ...and gotten 86'ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you
184. Taught yourself an art from scratch
185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
186. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt
187. Skipped all your school reunions
188. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
189. Been elected to public office
190. Written your own computer language
191. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
192. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
193. Built your own PC from parts
194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
195. Had a booth at a street fair
196. Dyed your hair
197. Been a DJ
198. Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal
199. Written your own role playing game
200. Been arrested
--
Bon
Weekly column at Showfax

"If I had known how popular going into casting would make me, I would've done it in high school." July 2003

Posted by bonnie at 5:27 PM

October 7, 2004

Ramblings

My GAWD, people! Would you PLEASE stop teasing the noon news (and the episodes of "Extra" and "Access Hollywood" and "Inside Edition" all coming up later today) showcasing MARTHA STEWART'S LAST DAY OF FREEDOM?!? For the love of God, people, who cares!?!? Yes, okay, SHE cares. But COME ON. Give me some news!!!!!!

I am fascinated by the trend of carving cornfields to encourage folks to vote. Hell, I'll say it worked for me, if you'll buy that (yeah, like anyone with a list of YES/NO for all of the local propositions wasn't already planning to vote... duh). Check this out!

Cooool.

Last night was The Night of the Crazy Cats.

Thwok decided she wanted to sleep on my head. Now, I don't mean the typical "my head's on a pillow and the cat wants to sleep on the pillow too, above or beside my head." No. I mean Thwok climed up my face (I was sleeping on my side, so she started at my mouth and climbed my nose), walked a "kitty circle" around my ear and flopped herself down ON MY HEAD.

I got up to pee and Archie followed me into the bathroom. Now, if you've met Archie, you know he's not wee. He's HUGE. So, of course, he decides to jump up on the vanity/sink area (no big deal) and then to the frame of the shower doors. Yes. He wants to stand on the top of the frame of the 1.5"-thick shower doors and perhaps leap to the in-shower window.

Predicting disaster, I quickly wiped up and "rescued" my 20-pound furball from his own instincts.

Was there a full moon last night?

Couldn't sleep for a couple of hours and kept singing Bangles' songs in my head. Weird. Ended up dreaming of The Brothers Greenstein, which makes me think I should send a hello to my old high school friends to see how they're doing. Also dreamed of lots of sex with some stranger. Hm.

And woke up saying the line from "Will & Grace" after Jack gets a postcard from his mother, telling him he's "a black boy" (his father was named something Black, but the episode is all about Jack thinking he's African-American). "I'm a negro and my mother says 'black boy.'" Then I start hearing Jack's brilliant monologue about being in love with the coffee guy.

Bangles and JUST JACK. WTF?

Weird night, for dang sure.

Wonder what Martha Stewart's up to now.

Posted by bonnie at 12:26 PM

October 5, 2004

Google Goes Keith as Keith Goes North

So, Keith got a freelance job a couple of weeks ago (THANKS, ROSE) at Google. Then he got a call, asking whether he could come on fulltime and do the same gig in-house that he'd been hired to do from home, PLUS the freelance gig, if he wanted to make extra "nights and weekend" money.

Um, yeah. Sure. We'll go with a YES.

He got the call today that it was time for him to go in and do the "campus tour" (oh, did I mention that "campus" is just a few blocks from our new Santa Monica digs??). And, of course, he's headed to NoCal for more family stuff (see past few months of back and forth-ness for the gory-gories) in just five hours. Happy, the Google folks already knew about this (yay for Keith having told them he was leaving town, back when they interviewed him; yay for them remembering that), and the tour is set up for the day after the Artios Awards and, of course, after Keith's return to escort me to said awards.

I'm just so proud of him.

And more than that, I'm proud of us. We made a pledge to one another to do better with our "relationship communication" issues (see anyone ever on Dr. Phil's TV show) and this was the first time we got up to the "just a few hours 'til the departure" phase without a big fight over nothing (or over something; or over whatever would make me mad at him and less likely to miss him while he's up north). Very good. Progress in relationship stuff... and after only three years. Awwwww.

No, I'm actually touched by the fact that we're able to communicate so well so soon after pledging to do so. That's important and stuff.

I'll miss him.

Luckily, I have a bazillion things to do while he's gone. Interviews for the book, meetings for casting, setting up the panel for LMU, prepping for The Actors' Network, and finishing the unpacking of this home, here. Oh, and we MUST buy table and chairs (or bench or nook or whatever; this is our favorite). I may do that while Keith is gone. And then there's the EARNING of money, seeing as that's an outflow. Hee hee. So much.

THANK YOU, JONI for the coolest EVER belated-birthday slash LASIK-recovery package on the planet!!!! OMG!! An electric Hello Kitty toothbrush with bubblegum toothpaste, all sorts of books from my Amazon.com wishlist, and a great photo from our early early childhood together (wow; great stuff). You're the bestest, Joan!

And with that, I must sign off. No, really.

COMMENT away, if you want to come hang out or help with the never-ending unpacking tasks 'round here. I also need arm candy to various showcases and events. Holla! (Yes... I'm only two years late on the catch-phrase. Watch out... "bling" is about to enter my vocabulary.)

Posted by bonnie at 1:19 AM

September 28, 2004

Thwok Loves...

...sliced almonds.

And she believes the sound of the printer starting up is "calling" her. Send a page to the printer and, from anywhere in the apartment, Thwok goes RUNNING toward it. We got our new printer yesterday and she's learned that there is a button she can step on (on the printer) that prints a test page.

Oh, we are in trouble with this one! I love her sooooooo.

Keith's Google interview went very well. VERY well. Tomorrow's eye meeting should be good. I'm trying to stay relaxed about it all. And tomorrow evening, we meet with the biggest "name" actor so far, to discuss the book. Awesome connection set up through one of Keith's contacts. Very very very cool. And Thursday and Friday, we conduct two more interviews for the book. Woo hoo! This rocks so hard. It's going to come together much sooner than I'd thought. That's awesome.

I hate to lose Keith for a week (he's headed up to NoCal again to deal with family stuff next Tuesday). I may need some company... anyone up for hanging out? But he has to go. It'll be good. He'll do good stuff. He always does. I'll just miss him like crazy.

Posted by bonnie at 8:26 PM

September 27, 2004

Three Entries in One

Easy Bake Oven

Ooh, I'm oh-so-happy. I had bought some dried cranberries from the produce section at the market the other day. When I had a handful today, I decided they'd taste REALLY good in some biscuits. Hey! We have a bag of Bisquik! Let's see if I can NOT burn down the house (seeing as I burn water).

Holy yumminess! I looooove my hot, fresh, buttered, cranberry biscuits. Yum!

Two-Day Blind

I have an appointment on Wednesday morning that requires I not wear my contacts 'til then. I took them out six hours or so ago (should've had 'em out sooner, but needed to see some important stuff first). Send healthy, ready-for-anything eye vibes to Santa Monica early Wednesday, okay?

Details after the initial consult.

Google Goes Keith

So, on 11 September, at lovely Ashley's birthday party, Rose told Keith about a freelance/work-from-home Google job. On that Monday, he applied, and they hired him. Done.

Today, he got a call asking if he'd like to come on full-time/in-house, which, considering the goodies like 24 Hour Fitness membership (for both of us), health insurance (for both of us), and regular pay at computer-genius level, he said he'd happily consider. He interviews with the bigger-up guy tomorrow.

Vibes toward Santa Monica (again) in the afternoon-ish tomorrow.

Oh, and one more...

Not really another entry, just an update: the book is moving along nicely. Today we got our highest-profile YES so far. Ooh, it's a good one. Looking forward to our interview next month, you lovely, lovely hunk of NYPD Blue man. Yowza! Yup... you ask... they say yes. It's ah-may-zing!

Posted by bonnie at 7:42 PM

September 24, 2004

Neighborhood Kid Stuff

So, on Wednesday afternoon before the (AMAZING, KICK-ASS, OMG, I-LOVED-IT) Pixies concert, Keith and I were taking a little nap, just to be sure we could keep up with the "kids" (and, yes, Keith was *close* to being the oldest one there... band members excluded, of course). While trying to sleep, we started hearing the banging of pipes across the street or down the street or somewhere within earshot in our otherwise quiet neighborhood.

What? Pipes? That's odd.

When I got up, I looked out our window and saw the beginnings of what turned out to be (one of my favorite things on the planet) a parking lot carnival! Problem is, it's for kids (rides too small for this big kid to play, though I'm sure I could get my face painted, if I really wanted to).

Anyway, click the pic if you want more info on what they're calling "Octoberfair." It looks pretty neat, and it (along with Taste of Santa Monica, which is going on this weekend too) is one of the things that makes me loooooove where I live.

It's quaint. And "quaint" is hard to come by in Los Angeles sometimes.

Posted by bonnie at 4:42 PM

September 5, 2004

Friend Over

Just had many hours of a good friend over... a good friend who is not a fan of Keith. That's the weird part. But, I guess not everyone you love can love everyone you love, right?

Still fun.

Just weird. Wow... it's so beyond bedtime.

Posted by bonnie at 4:28 AM

September 1, 2004

Brown Bread

Did any of you use the term "brown bread" to refer to whole wheat bread, growing up?

Keith bought white bread the other day and I was telling him that I preferred wheat, but instead said the words, "I like brown bread better."

And suddenly I was eight-years-old or something. I don't think I've called wheat bread "brown bread" since I was a kid, but I can't recall whether that's a real memory or something I've heard or what. Memories are so weird and disconnected since my mom passed away. Very odd.

Anyone have a childhood memory of "brown bread" to share that might help me connect the dots?

Meanwhile...

Today is the day I paid off my final credit card put into consolidation four years ago (when I was over $75,000 in debt). September 15th will be the first 15th in over four years that an automatic payment will not go from my checking account to the Debt Consolidation program. I am freeeeeeeee. *phew* Feels good. REALLY good.

Posted by bonnie at 10:58 AM

August 27, 2004

50 Cents a Game

That's how much it costs to play Galaga on the Santa Monica Pier. Hm. Is that what all the games cost nowdays or are they pinging the old folks? Hm.

So, we walked from home to the post office, to the bank, to the pier, and back tonight. Awesome. Starting to have that really good feeling that comes with regular exercise: strengthening my heart, breathing in great stuff, getting more and more confident. It's nice.

Staged reading for Crossing the Bridge (working title) Monday. Lemmeknow if you wanna come and I'll get you the details. Looks like we've got a pretty full house. Cool. Directors especially--we need a director. Shoots December 2004 in Northern California. Very cool little script. Drama. Probably can be done for $500,000. We'll use a SAG Modified Low Budget contract, most likely.

Keith's getting new headshots Tuesday. Cool! Love those "deals." ;) Hee hee. Now we gotta look at some wardrobe options and figure out to do with his kazillion B&W "cop shots." Hm. Trimming down to postcards, perhaps? Man, I need an assistant!

Okay, tomorrow is PHONE DAY. I MUST return phone calls, like it or not! Man, am I my mother's child or what? LOL

Posted by bonnie at 12:44 AM

August 15, 2004

Phew!

Okay, so I've been bragging about how happy I am to live in a home that has been given a Feng Shui makeover by a professional (Faith's treat to herself before the show got picked up and before she sold her pilot). Every time I say the phrase "Feng Shui," someone decides to correct me. They always do it very kindly, by using "Feng Shui" in a sentence of their own, being sure to pronounce the "Feng" FEHNG.

Well, I finally got sick of it and Googled "pronounce Feng Shui". Dammit, it feels gooooood to be right. FUNG, dammit. FUNG! I can't believe I doubted me! ;) Of course, I guess you can CHOOSE to say it wrong (like this columnist) if you really want to. I'm just glad I'm right. Tee hee.

Okay, enough of that silliness.

Keith is on his way home from Sacramento. Further phew! Thank you to everyone for the good vibes, love, visits, and advice. I really do have some amazing friends.

Scheduling actors for Each To Each prereads like a crazy woman. I always get so excited before prereads. And during I'm always very impressed and amazed at the talented people I know who so openly share their gifts.

Any folks who want to volunteer as casting interns for the day(s) Thursday and/or Friday, lemmeknow. I'll need people from 10am to 6pm both days (any length of shift within that range will be helpful, really).

Cheers!

Oh, does anyone know the OFFICIAL policy on feeding/giving to the homeless here in Santa Monica? I don't want to do anything the city discourages or even arrests over. But with that big park right across the street, I do get asked for stuff. Just wanna know the score.

Posted by bonnie at 10:40 PM

July 26, 2004

Packed It

I think... I finally... packed... my brain.

I've been joking about that for a week or so, but I believe it has happened. I am officially fried. FRIED.

But I think we're now actually very close to being able to move OUT of the old apartment and into the new one... once they give us access to the new place. Ack!

MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR thank yous to the families Koellish and Lindsay. Y'all kick ass!!!!! Wow!

I'm fried. Luckily, the Chihuahua I'm taking care of doesn't mind. Sadly, the people I'm to interact with... yeah, they'd prefer a non-fried Bon. Maybe next week.

Posted by bonnie at 2:09 AM

July 20, 2004

What is WRONG with me?!?

Okay, so I'm spending every spare moment packing and purging (man, is it EVER liberating to toss YEARS-in-the-making collections, stacks, and STUFF!) and I come across my 377-page Getting Interactive with Authorware manual by Lloyd P. Rieber, circa 1997 and the start of my PhD program in Instructional Technology at the University of Georgia.

Why do I feel the need to keep this thing?!?

I don't understand it. I haven't OWNED a computer on which the version of Authorware depicted in this manual's pages could operate since 1999. I haven't DESIGNED a piece of Authorware software since 1998, in the class associated with this very manual. I haven't RUN a piece of software designed on Authorware since 1998 (unless I may have run my programs in 1999, just for sentimental reasons--can't recall).

Why do I want to keep the manual that taught me how to program in Authorware? Well, it IS a very well-written and easy-to-follow technical manual, as technical manuals go.

I must say that the most influential "while-petsitting-and-not-packing" reading I've done this week has been Clear Your Clutter With Fung Shui. If that can't decrease your OCD/packrat tendencies, I don't know what will!

LIBERATING! That's what throwing things away IS!

Posted by bonnie at 2:09 PM

July 11, 2004

When July Comes the 11th

I grew up hearing that I loved to tell people, when asked, "How old are you?" "When July comes the 11th, I'll be..." rather than doing the standard, "I'm freeeeee," "I'm four years old," or "I'm THIS many!"

I think that's great! I love that I love my birthday. And I love that I'm the only person I know with this birthday. I know TEN different people born on January 28th. TEN. Is that karma, or what? And I have LIVED with TWO different people born on March 3rd! What does this tell you? I know so many people with the same birthdays... and I have never met another 7-11 baby. Yes, I know OF them (Suzanne Vega and Peter Gabriel, for two examples), but we've never met.

So far, today has been grand. Having an absolutely delightful birthday. Very quiet and warm. I have lots of Roxbury work to do today, so that will be my main focus, and then back to packing. I know... big party birthday, but I guess 34 isn't the party-animal-age we all heard it was. Tee hee.

Oh, speaking of party-animal-age... Keith and I were driving recently and heard on the radio that you could call in and win a year's worth of free passes to the live "Star Lounge" recording sessions (sort of an Unplugged thing). This is a huge deal and everyone's really excited about it. My comment, "There was a time when I would've been all over that. That time is sooooo nowhere near today."

Heh heh. I'm old.

We're running out of "staging area" space for packing. Ack! But we learned that Faith is 100% out of her place already, so we should be able to start moving things over within a week to ten days. Very excited! Of course, I'll be in Marina del Rey, pet-sitting, but I'm SURE Keith will do a good job with all the heavy lifting. Ha ha.

Thank you to everyone who is making this birthday so incredibly special. Seriously; I have gotten the most heartfelt, wonderful, dazzling messages, cards, and emails this year. Everyone is making my special day (who are we kidding? I celebrate the whole month... duh!) really fantastic. THANK YOU for being in my life. I am truly blessed!

Posted by bonnie at 12:04 PM

July 9, 2004

GMail Update

I have been using GMail for--what--two weeks or so and just now hit 1mb/1% (1% holds 'til 10mb) of my capacity. So, I chose "delete forever" for the messages in my trash and now I'm back down to 0mb/0% of my capacity.

So far, I've moved all of my subscriptions and notifications that were with Netscape Mail and Hotmail over to GMail, but not my Yahoo Mail stuff, since they've upped the storage to 1gb too, in order to stay competitive. Fine. Pretty cool. No complaints, except for a glitch in ONE of my Yahoo Groups on digest mode, which gets about every 10th digest in some weird format, which I cannot read in the mail. *shrug* No biggie.

Bon Update

I realize that my vague post about my ego-smack and come-down after lots of high-energy goodies has worried some people. Please please please know that I blog like I live: the thought/idea/concept goes out there and I move on. Everything is fine; I was just noticing a pattern in my level of activity (high), amount of prosperity (high), being followed by a quick crash in my physical state and an ego-smack from a friend. Seems I consistently get my feelings hurt and my physical energy rundown right after a series of really great events and happenings. So, I was just musing about the pattern.

Cindy, your comment on the WATER is just what I needed. THANK YOU. I KNOW we are to live in the FLOW. That's what leads to all the GOOD stuff. Silly to then shift into an ego-based state and get the smack-down both physically and emotionally, as if to remind me that I'm to stay OUT of that mindset.

All this to say, all is well. I am spending every free moment packing and integrating the kitty into the cat-family here. Thwok is doing well and all three of the kitties LOVE the empty boxes, open drawers, cabinets, and closets. It's a world of play around here, and that keeps me amused while doing the PURGING that inevitably comes with packing/moving. It's a good thing. Took six bags to Good Will yesterday. More to go. Decided we can't manage a moving sale, as planned, due to the timing of all of this. Must just give and move on.

Ack! This break is lasting longer than I thought it would. Oh, Chip has added Wiki to the SpyNotebook, whatever that means. Yes... I'm intrigued. Love gettin' my geek on!

Back to packing!

Posted by bonnie at 11:12 AM

June 1, 2004

If You Have Kids...

...you probably already know this. It's new to me.

Stuffed animals require good-night kisses too.

Awwwwwwwwwww.

Posted by bonnie at 11:40 PM

May 24, 2004

This and That

Okay, here's the catch up...

I have slept ALL DAY. Seriously. I slept from 7am to 2pm and then again from 4pm to 7pm. Wow! Just wild!! I do that every now and then, so I guess it's not out of the realm of possibility, but man... wild to sleep so much! Hopefully that means I'm coming around to 100% in the health world. We'll see.

Gearing up for Quinn's visit, which is awesome. Really can't wait! Keith spoke to him yesterday (from the set--Keith's still shooting his movie) and Quinn asked to speak to me. Aw. So sweet. Can't wait to have him here.

Agenda so far includes a kid-friendly gathering at Conan Carroll's house, Memorial Day BBQ at Paul Molinaro's house, pool party at Jeff Denker's house, Sea World with a posse of kids and families (and breakfast with Shamu), JohnAngelo Carver's 2nd birthday party, and hanging out with Nelson Aspen's dog and cat (which we'll continue to do after Quinn goes home--Nelson's on assignment for Sunrise).

Wow! That's a lot to pack into a week. And there's more. I'm just so so so so so looking forward to having the little guy here. He's such a ball of love. Need the constant hugs. That'll be great! Kids are fun.

Commerce

I received the shipment of new shoes I'd ordered online today. I've been on a quest to find a pair of sandals that would replace the awesomely gorgeous, most comfortable, amazing pair that I bought from Tweeds back in 1999. Yes, I've been keeping a pair of sandals on life support for the better part of five years. Poor little shoes--they so rock. And of course, Tweeds has gone out of business and the only identifying mark on the sandals is for the company that manufactures the soles. So... the happy news is, I finally settled on (and yes, it's settling, b/c what I WANT is to go back in time and have bought five pairs of these great shoes in 1999) this pair (in black, though) from Softwalk. And... they weren't cheap... but dammit I couldn't MacGuyver my old sandals anymore.

And that reminds me that I was successful in finding someone, ANYONE to sell me Donna Karan's Chaos, the perfume I've loved since finding it (on my cousin Tracy's wrists) in 1996 when she and I both lived in Athens. I immediately bought myself a bottle (after asking her whether she'd be upset at me for wearing "her" fragrance. She, moving to Hawaii at the time, didn't care what I did with my wrists and neck) and, in 1997, Donna Karan quit making it. Of course, I didn't learn that until 1999, when it was time to buy more. By then... where was I ever going to find any? There HAD to be some out there, somewhere, right? Nope. I've been to every fragrance outlet, every supplier/wholesaler, every little mom and pop store I could find, hoping they'd have a bottle stashed away that I could buy off them. Well holy crap if I didn't find a source on eBay!

Now, they're only selling the purse spray vials, but dammit, they're doing so for about $5-$10 each and I'm buying them up like mad. Happy, happy me! I don't know why I didn't start searching eBay sooner. Now I'm like the Hello Kitty-buying addict I was when I started eBaying in 1997. God bless the Internet.

My First Film

You'll recall the announcement from a while back about my first feature film and its first (semi-)public screening earlier this month. Well, Keith got the director to send over a copy of the poster and here it is!

If you want the much larger version via email, lemmeknow. Yes, that's my name at the end of the first line of small text at the bottom. Tee hee. Happy me.

Cousinly Pride

And yes, if you tuned in to watch VH-1 & Blender Magazine's 50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs recently, you did, in fact, see Cousin Faith making fun of Mister Mister, Sisqo, and Rick Astley. *sniffle* I'm so proud of my girl.

No news on when season two of Significant Others starts taping, though it is soonish, as its schedule has to fit in with the filming of Perfect, since Fred Goss is a lead in both the series and our film. Did I mention how weird it was to have a $25,000 check in our house for a week recently? Phew! Go, Keith on nailing that investment! Man, he's a good associate producer! Truly!

Should have a meeting soon about the next film I'm casting. I did get a call about a promo project shooting Thursday for which the producer needs my help. Glad to do it. Tomorrow, I will be awake during daylight and make some noise. ;)

What else? Kitties are good. Keith is good--busier than ever. It's like the first four months of the year were all me and these next couple so far have been all him. It's fun to have that sort of dance and not feel weird about taking turns and supporting one another.

Oh! And Hollywood Happy Hour is ready to go for July 6th. Get those RSVPs in sooooon! We've announced our new guests to the Hollywood Calendar and The Hollywood Reporter, which should be sending out a WireImage.com photographer again (man, they do great work). I'll update the site with the official announcements of guests soon. This one's going to be GREAT!

Okay, back to work. *snicker* I know, I wasn't working today. I was sleeping. So... time for work. Get out the whip! Updates when possible... 'til then, know I'm in a good place now, everyone. THANK YOU FOR ALL OF THE GOOD VIBES AND LOTS OF LOVE.

Posted by bonnie at 8:57 PM

May 21, 2004

Ahh... Much Better

Went for a late night walk with my lovely fiancé after we'd gotten into bed for the night and started talking... we talked a bunch and then I started to cry... just release from all that I'm going through right now, I guess. And then Keith said, "C'mon. Let's go for a walk." So we did.

I feel better.

I still have the throb in/under/around my left eye (and it's actually become more of a constant throb today) and am contemplating taking the last of my Vicodin, simply so I can knock out and be done with it. Still a little nervous after Monday's experience, though.

Joni's suggestion of Nyquil sounds good. We'll see. No decisions yet. I'll keep editing the archives for Dalt's Gang which is a major OCD-loving task that also keeps me from thinking about my pain, so I may not need anything.

Realized today that, numerologically, I'm in what tends to be the worst spot of my nine-year cycles. In 1995, I was in and out of the hospital (but, man, I was smokin' hot skinny girl... miss that action... LOL). In 1986, I was constantly ill and depressed. And in 1977... well... not sure. Joni? Any ideas? I know I used to get strep throat a lot back then. And bladder infections.

Proof of the "skinny."

Ugh. Anyway, so if this is the "repair year," why the eff does it always have to be my effin' BODY? Ugh.

Happily, that energy always shifts by October, as I ease into my next cycle.

Oh, and I have a birthday soon... Keith reminded me yesterday.

Speaking of birthdays, it's my younger (of the two of them) brother's 50th birthday today. Ack! I'm sooo lucky to be young. Shut up, young friends! Yeah, I know you were born in the '80s. Kiss it!

Hee hee.

I must be feeling better, if I'm fiesty-posting.

Oh, and I'll end on a moment of silence for Wolfesden. For over five years and 100,000 posts, this actors' resource and discussion forum has been a leader in this town and in this industry as a whole. Sterling Wolfe took a lot of heat for a long time running that board at his own cost (time, money, energy, reputation) during some really rough points in the industry (commercial strike, workshop debate, discovery of actors' headshots for sale on eBay) and for my life personally (my mother's death, my resignation from Back Stage West... plus publishing my first two books and moving into casting). I have built some amazing friendships through this corner of the Internet and it's a sad day to see it go. Still, I support Sterling's decision and absolutely wish him the best on his journey from here. He supported so many for so long! It's his turn!

Posted by bonnie at 11:54 PM

May 18, 2004

Plumbing

What the hell is it with this old building and its plumbing issues?

Don't answer that. I know. :(

So yesterday morning, we wake up to find a puddle outside our bathroom door. This time, it's not the tree-roots-through-the-street-pipes induced toilet overflow, it's not the incorrect-size-pipe-with-a-bandaid-for-a-washer-that-finally-broke leak under our sink, and it's not the never-connected-the-tub-overflow-to-anything-other-than-a-shallow-pan-beneath-the-tub drip that turned into a rainfall of soapy plaster onto our neighbor's car parked in the garage beneath our apartment. No, no... this time, it's the water heater that lives in the cabinet next to the bathroom, having overflowed into the cabinet below and the carpet (and padding) that's already been replaced since we've lived here due to the above-mentioned toilet backups (back when every flush of every toilet in the apartment building caused an overflow into our toilet and the landlord insisted it was OUR fault... yeah... we have control over the way the roots grow into 60-year-old pipes out in the street. We are that powerful).

So, it's not enough that I spent yesterday dealing with a mild overdose and the initial pain that caused the drug-taking to begin with... no, no, it's not that my two hours of sleep this morning ended abruptly when the water-heater-replacement guy came out (yes, a 13 year old water heater is OUT of warranty, silly manager lady), it's that the next two hours of sleep I tried to get (as the water-heater-replacement guy left... leaving the new water heater in the hall--blocking the entrance to the bathroom for all but the cats) ended abruptly with the entrance of a team of plumbers who must now dig into the wall above the water heater's cabinet to replace the cracked pipe that takes hot water from the water heater to the faucet calling for it.

Number of non-stop hours of clanging and banging and rumbling so far: six, with no end in sight.

*sigh*

I really was going to spend today recovering from whatever it is that's causing my physical stresses.

Having learned that the distributor for our books is holding another $2000 of the money from the book sales of October, 2003 (yes, you read that right... October sales), just as we prepare for the only real "vacation time" we take--when Keith's son comes to town late next week, is not the way to NOT have stress.

Keith is terrified. He's afraid there's something in my brain about to burst and that I'm getting symptoms that shouldn't be ignored. Yeah, well... when the free clinic can help out, I'm there. 'Til then, pharmaceutically-endowed friends and a cold, quiet, dark room with no outside stress will have to do. Oh wait... this isn't a cold, quiet, dark room with no outside stress!

No wonder he's terrified.

I just keep going back to the amazing book that Faith gave me: Excuse Me, Your Life Is Waiting, and reminding myself that we attract what we focus on (nothing new there... Law of Attraction). So, I must keep my focus on the things that thrill me: my friends, my work, my cats, Keith's love, being able to live on a very small budget, and the signals Mom sends that I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.

There is no amount of work that can truly "mend" bad plumbing. You simply replace what is broken, clean up the mess, and continue living.

Posted by bonnie at 4:17 PM

March 24, 2004

Shopping = GOOOOOD

Oh, man. We really found some deals. I certainly feel better now. Way better.

Details on the take: Okay, so after a late breakfast, Keith and I hit the Citadel Outlets which has a parking area that is undergoing renovations right now. Still very easy to get to, no bad traffic, and great great great selections. No big crowds or anything. Great option. Much better than the MALL.

First stop: Old Navy Outlet. In our bag: 9 pairs of socks for Keith, 2 ringer Ts for Keith, one gorgeous ribbed crew-neck shirt for Keith, one short duster for me, and one kick-ass $5 plunging-neckline paisley blouse for me. Total spent: $57.31.

Next stop: Eddie Bauer Outlet. In our bag: 2 pairs of shorts for Keith, in two colors. Total spent: $48.50.

Third stop: Some random Fragrance Outlet that doesn't have Donna Karan Chaos, the one and only fragrance I've ever loved SO MUCH. No one has it, though. It isn't made anymore. So, while I continue to ration out the few remaining drops from the bottle I bought in 1997, I will also always pop into a store that sells fragrances on the off chance they have ONE LAST BOTTLE stuck away somewhere, hiding, waiting for me. I did buy two lipglosses there, though. Total spent: $2.11.

Next stop: Max Studio Outlet. This is the place that was my FAVORITE source for nice clothes when I lived in Los Angeles in 1993 and 1994. Man, I LOVE their clothes. And... this was where I really started feeling a little mood elevation. In our bag: this GORGEOUS duster in bone, a lovely camel sweater with ribbons and lace, and--HOLY CRAP--an amazing chocolate brown suede tank top for $18!! Of course, what I REALLY wanted to buy, we left on the rack. And someday, she will be mine: the (originally) $700 long, suede coat. Holy crap, it felt like butter. Total spent: $138.56. We got away soooooo easy.

Next stop: Kitchen Collection Outlet. This was less about fun and more about needs. In our bag: grater, a spatula, a few wooden spoon-like things (including a plain ol' wooden spoon), a serving bowl, and some ginger wasabi sauce. Total spent: $23.29, but $2.99 plus tax doesn't count, as we were charged TWICE for the grater. Grr.

Finally, we hit For Pets Only, which doesn't seem to have a website... and it wasn't part of the outlet store area anyway. But Keith had long wanted to get the kitties some corner-mounted self-grooming thingies and it was definitely time to replace the cardboard panel in their Alpine Cosmic Catnip Scratcher. Man, they are high as kites now. LOL.

So, the whole day turned out to be really wonderful. Bags and bags of goodies for less than $300. Considering we were going to do a getaway (to Mammoth or Palm Springs or San Diego) for a few days, I'd say we got off WAY cheaper and I have clothing to wear for Hollywood Happy Hour, Keith's set for Ts and socks and shorts, kitties are happy, and there's new stuff in the kitchen.

Rock on, Citadel!

Time for our walk. Then I'm back to organizing headshots for hours. LOL--Salema is falling asleep standing up. So funny!!

Posted by bonnie at 7:07 PM

Getting Organized

I finally have a chance to organize all of the bins of headshots in this apartment. Of course, I keep coming up with new systems within subsets of systems and the categories are never-ending, it seems. LOL

OCD is a funny thing.

I'm just glad I got over the keeping EVERY SINGLE HEADSHOT I'd ever received EVER thing. That was getting a little... well... walls-closing-in-ish.

I think, to blow out a funk I've been basking in the past couple of days, a trip to the outlet stores is in order. I'm not usually a shopper. In fact, I only ever seem to shop online, really. But I somehow feel that finding anything for around 75% off will improve my mood.

Can't hurt.

Posted by bonnie at 5:32 AM

March 17, 2004

A New Deadly Sin

I have a new mistress. Her name is Walnut Shrimp. Her source is Kung Pao China Bistro of West Hollywood. She is delivered.

I am unrepentant.

Casting

We had callbacks a dozen hours ago or so. Wow. Just wow and wow and wow some more. I am truly blessed to know the talented people I know. Wow.

Posted by bonnie at 3:15 AM

March 13, 2004

Things and Stuff

I am not currently at Debra's house, after the memorial service for her sweet mother. I am still too close to all of the feelings I have over that kind of loss. I wrote her a long email a few days ago and cried the whole time I typed it. Couldn't stop. Just too hard, losing Mom. Keith reminds me Debra will need me MUCH more in a few weeks and months when everyone else has gone away. That's true. I remember those days.

*prayers*

Love Affair

Y'know what I love? My TiVo. I've been living in the bedroom for the past week, since it's been so so so damn hot and that's the only room with the AC. So, I've been subjected to the rabbit-ears on the 13" TV with no remote for my viewing pleasures while working on callbacks for the film and on promotional activities for Faith's show. (Hey, please feel free to pass that promotional activities link around generously. The show MUST get as-good or better ratings on Tuesday as/than it got on its first night in order to get renewed. AND... Faith gets bizzy with an electric toothbrush, for cryin' out loud!!)

ANYWAY, I'm back in the living room today and enjoying the wonders of TiVo and a cool cross-wind with the lovely windows open. Ahh. It's nice.

Oh, and I'm nursing two major scratches on my forearm from our late-night medicine-giving attempt with Salema. Ow. We went to a great comedy show last night, followed by a very late night dinner and sugar fix at Jerry's Famous Deli with friends. Very good. Home very late, and then there was the Significant Others promo to create. And with my arm dripping blood. Lovely.

Geekorama

Two cool memes from BrYan (oh, and an explanation of What a Meme Is and memories from when I first did memes with BrYan.

"If you know me as..."

If you know me as BonBon, you probably knew me as a kid, a teenager, or a very childlike adult.

If you know me as Bonauello or Bonifred, we went to UGA together and you worked at the Tutor House with me.

If you know me as Bonnifer, Bonathan, or Bonalynn, you have heard me bitch about people who ask me, "What's Bonnie short for?" *thud*

If you know me as Atena, you were in my highschool Spanish class, in which my teacher said I was not allowed to be called "Bonita," as that is NOT the Spanish equivilant of the name "Bonnie." Yeah, sure... whatever, Jabba.

If you know me as ActorsBon, you met me through ActorsBone.com, where I answered questions posed by actors for a couple of years.

If you know me as Scully, you worked for me at WUOG between 1995 and 1997.

If you know me as Bonne Bell, you know I have 28 flavors of Lip Smacker.

If you know me as eBONics, Super BonBon, BonBonarie, or Bonnissimo, we went to college together--most likely grad school--and hung out together at the Engine Room, throwing darts and drinking Dry Blackthorne.

If you know me as Miss G., you were one of my students at Athens Academy in the 1997-98 school year.

If you know me as Bon Bon Jovi, you were in my 8th grade class at North Springs High School in Hotlanta.

If you know me as Bonnie Athene, you either only email me at my Earthlink address or you are a member of my family, telling me I'm in trouble by doing the middle-name thing.

If you know me as Little Bonnie, you also know my great aunt Bonnie, AKA Big Bonnie, age 96.

If you know me as Brat, you are my cousin or my aunt.

If you know me as Precious (or "Presh"), you are Faith Salie.

If you know me as a BonBot, you are a very recent Internet-based friend who may or may not have invaded my real life... yeah... most of you have done that. Hee hee.

And finally, if you ever call me "just like your brother," I will have to kill you. LOL

The next meme

1. Enter your first name only into Google.
2. Then click the "Images" tab.
3. Pick your favorite and post it in your journal.

Wow! That was sooooooo much fun... and there were so many thousands of photos to choose from. Of course, I had to limit my favorites to like a dozen or so, all here, for you to enjoy. But this image is definitely the best of the bunch.

Man, those were some good memes! Thanks, BrYan.

Okay, now that I've been blogging and memeing for FOUR hours, I'd say it's time to get back to work!!!!! LOL

Posted by bonnie at 6:26 PM

February 11, 2004

No Longer a Member of the MTV Generation

It's sad, but true. I love the concept of the new Choose or Lose campaign from MTV...

...but it's not about me. :(

Ah, well. What are ya gonna do?

Meanwhile...

Still planning the trip east. Very excited. Looks like the public speaking gig at UGA will be on the 20th at noon. And the event on the 21st will be at Twist. Dateline NBC passed on the anniversary story, but it looks like Today is happily nibbling. Way cool.

The Breakdown for Perfect went out today. Pretty dang cool. Immediate non-stop phone calls and emails once it hit. And... happy news... every one--except ONE--of the "name" actors we've approached (through their reps) is currently reading the script to consider the project. Truly cool.

Okay, enough of that. Much to do and it's way late. Not that that matters. You know... Back to work!

Posted by bonnie at 2:53 AM

February 8, 2004

'Bout To Get Crazy

I know, I know... it's always crazy, right?

But man, it's about to get way way waaaaay kicked into high gear. Cool.

Both speaking engagements last week were rockstar. So much fun. And our trip east is getting more and more jam-packed with activity. THANK YOU to everyone who is helping us make this happen. So excited!!

On my way this afternoon to the staged reading for the feature film I'm casting. Pretty dang excited. Need to make the industry check-in list and make sure my 8mm camera still works. Tee hee.

Oh, and I got a new toy. Yep. That Treo I've been lusting over... the one that--when I saw it in person in January--underwhelmed me completely... has been on my mind non-stop, so I finally buckled and bought the damn thing. WOW. Such a cool piece of technology. What it really came down to was this: I didn't want to take the Chicklet on the trip east. Now I don't have to. I can take the Treo instead (I'll name it later... it took awhile for the Chicklet's name to emerge and even longer for the TicTac's name to become evident).

Okay... work to do. Meanwhile, I took a snapshot of my Friendster profile so that I could enjoy a "moment in history" when I feel blue. Hey... sometimes I feel blue. Pff. You'll have to actually GO to my Friendster profile at Friendster.com in order to have any of the links active. This is just an archive thingy. Got it?

Oh, man... I am just so frickin' happy I can't stand it. That's awesome. Happy Happy Happy and so excited about the trip east!! Woo hoo!!

Posted by bonnie at 2:28 PM

January 30, 2004

Fan Mail

It's just way humbling. Every day this week, I've received either an email or snail mail with a thank you note inside. Not just your average ordinary thank you note... a real, sincere, warm, thoughtful thank you note FROM SOMEONE I'VE NEVER MET.

Just wild. When the first one came, I thought, "Wow. How cool. Neat." And stuff like that.

The second one came and I thought, "What a cool week! I'm so happy!"

And today, when the fourth one came, I pretty much cried. That book has meant something to people. I really did the right thing by writing it. Wow.

How often do we get confirmation that we're doing exactly what we're supposed to do in life? Wow. That's pretty dang cool.

Posted by bonnie at 12:49 AM

December 24, 2003

Like Taking Candy from a Baby

Is it really EASY to take candy from a baby? I can only assume that it would be quite difficult, resulting in tugging and lots of loud crying. So... how is that phrase analogous with something that is easy?

Hm.

Posted by bonnie at 12:21 PM

December 19, 2003

Blog-free Zone

Yeah... SpyNotebook is down. It has been. Lucy (the server) died and Chip is putting up Harriet (new server). So why am I blogging if this can't upload? Eh... it'll show up eventually.

So, received a fortune in a fortune cookie from Gimlet Night. On the back: "Do you have the next Millionaire hit? Pitch your TV show idea to three TV execs in Hollywood. Enter at...." Egad! That's just wrong! Don't fall for it, non-Hollywood-ians. You aren't going to win a pitch meeting from a fortune cookie!

Ooh... lottery numbers.

Posted by bonnie at 5:18 AM

December 3, 2003

Finally Feeling Better

I am finally, finally, finally feeling better! That's 17 days of ick, finally kicked. Wow. Poor Keith is still in bed with it. I'm just so happy to be vertical for a bit without needing a nap to recover from it.

Went to the Roxbury Publishing Company annual potluck yesterday and was so glad to get to see everyone again, meet the office newbies, and eat some great food. Really great group of people and I'm pleased to say I've been working for them for over four years now. Wow. That means my anniversary of LA living is coming up on five years. Holy cow. On December 29th, I'll have been here for five years. This time. 13 months in 1993-1994. I guess LA really is home, eh?

Today is Kris Burtt's birthday. Yay! Happy birthday!

Been getting some really cool mail, email, and phone calls about Self-Management for Actors which is just really fun. I guess it's a good book. That's amazing. The fact that it's touching people and helping them and making them feel compelled to tell me how much it means to them... that's a gift I hadn't counted on.

Way cool.

Went out with Dalt's Gang Monday night. Dalt's... Casting Office for rockstar karaoke... then Jerry's Famous Deli 'til 4am. Eesh! What a great way to get back to the land of the living! LOL Great group of people and I'm thrilled to call them my friends.

Kitties are good. Eating lots of food to celebrate the winter weather (um... yeah... it's like 70 degrees).

I think Keith and I may run off to Vegas later this month and get married. We'll see. Tee hee. Having fun, and that's what counts, right?

Okay, back to work. Much much much to catch up on, making up for having been out of commission for so long. That's okay. I'm up to it. Finally!

Posted by bonnie at 1:06 PM

November 30, 2003

Oh, Crap

I'm sicker again. How the hell does this happen? I'm feeling better, I'm thinking I may be at the end of this thing, and then it hits me: I'm awash in a feverish thud and my head feels like it wants to expose its insides ala coconut begging to be milked.

Ugh. Can't take it. Did I push too hard today? Jesus. Sitting up and coming into the living room instead of staying in bed all day is pushing? How am I to get anything done? This just sucks. I keep hearing that people are needing a month to get rid of the current strain of flu going around... but I keep thinking I don't have THAT flu. God, if I do, this is only the half-way point. Crap on a cracker, that just bites.

Posted by bonnie at 10:03 PM

OMG

OMG, this is brilliant and soooooo true. It's the Modern Drunkard Index's 86 Rules of Boozing. Of course, there's one missing, and it's my biggest "drinking with others" pet peeve on the planet:

IF YOU ARE ENGAGED IN A TOAST, YOU MUST TAKE A SIP OF YOUR DRINK BEFORE SETTING IT DOWN! IT IS HORRIBLY BAD LUCK TO PUT YOUR GLASS DOWN AFTER TOASTING BUT BEFORE DRINKING!

I am SHOCKED at how frequently I see that happen. It's like people KNOW it bothers me and therefore do it just to watch me cringe.

Dear me... I must be feeling better. That felt like a rant.

Posted by bonnie at 8:44 PM

Made for Me

It's like this show--Big in 2003 on VH-1--was made for me. Well, except for some of the kids today who I just do NOT know [*shaking my head* When DID I get so old?] it was really great. Got to see some of my old faves from casting Mr. Personality and Paradise Hotel (which Kathy Griffin called the seventh sign of the apocalypse), which is fun. And the Michael Jackson jokes were especially juicy. One question: who the eff are the Hilton Sisters and who the eff gives a crap?

Keith's sick in bed. Since he's a good four days behind me in the full-swing of this thing (I think), he should stay there for at least four more days. Today was my first day out of bed more hours than in, and that's only b/c I didn't want to disturb Keith by being restless in the bed while he's sleeping. Poor kid. Theraflu has knocked him out, but he's not big into drugs, so he's fighting it.

I can hear the helicopters and such from the Hollywood Christmas Parade going on down the street. Ah... I recall ten years ago when I lived here (well, four blocks from here, but near enough) and worked for Joey Lawrence who was in the parade that year. Totally different experience than sitting here in my PJs, watching TV, finishing Christmas cards, and dragging a string along the floor for the kitties. Ah... so good to be 33.

Tomorrow I will be healthy. Dammit!

Posted by bonnie at 8:19 PM

November 12, 2003

What's Up?

As you may or may not have noticed (from the longer list of archives over there), I've recently moved some of my journals from 1999 and 2000 over to the land of the Blog. Also, I found some of my favorite posts from Wolfesden.net from the days when I wasn't keeping an electronic version of a diary at all and added those in there as well, just to bridge the gap between August 2000 and January 2002. Seems to have done a pretty good job of representing where I was with everything back in those days (except that almost all of the 1999 and 2000 posts are about my weight--that's on purpose--I was undertaking a "Babe2000" quest that I'd agreed to chronicle online with my fellow Babe2000 participants).

Lemme tell ya something I learned this morning: I've become addicted to iced tea. The reason I know that is that I just went through the drive-thru of Del Taco at 6am to get a burrito (99 cents of yummy) and an iced tea. And they hadn't brewed any. Boo hoo! I suddenly realized it wasn't the burrito that sent me out at that hour... it was the TEA. Man! Oh well... good to know. And it's a better addiction than a lot I've endured.

Keith comes home from Sacramento today. Yay! I have missed him a great deal. He's in a marrying mood, after having attended his best friend's wedding while up there. We'll see. I could stand an eloping... we'll see. Stay tuned and such. Who knows? We certainly don't!

Posted by bonnie at 6:49 AM

November 7, 2003

Bored

Oh, the things I find amusing.

I just spent the better part of 13 hours compiling statistics on the most prolific posters at Wolfesden in honor of the forthcoming 100,000th saved post. My OCD loves that shit. I even forgot to eat. Typical. I think I'm trying to keep myself preoccupied while Keith's out of town. He's going to be gone so long that I'll get used to it, but the first night or two is always a challenge. I miss my baby.

Speaking of babies...

The TicTac is BACK! Yay! Looks like new, except for where they pressure washed some paint off and tried to cover it up with touch-up paint (c'mon... shouldn't you TELL a person that happened, when they pick the car up? Of course, Keith picked the car up and he doesn't look for such things as that, the license plate frame on upside down on the front end, or the smear of white paint in the shape of a thumbprint on the soft top. That's stuff only a mother notices, I guess). I'm just glad to have it back. No more shop-time for the TicTac in 2003. That's the goal!

I don't quite understand how it is that I stay awake so so so so so many hours. I do a lot of work, but then my brain sort of turns off and I can't really get anything accomplished, but I also can't sleep. So... I play BINGO (God, am I my grandmother's kid or what?), watch TiVo'd shows and catch Kris on ShopNBC for a few hours, let the cats sleep on me and shuffle around paperwork for a little while. Tomorrow, I'll spend the day focused on casting tasks: sending SAG paperwork in, shopping for actors on LACasting.com, looking at demo reels I've been sent, making lists; and then visit with precious cousin Faith for the first time since the second Gimlet Night back in... what? September? August? Ugh. It's been too long.

Saturday, I will speak at the Women In Theatre luncheon in North Hollywood. I'm excited about that. It's a good group and the talk went really well on Wednesday night at Take One, so I'm feeling good about gearing up for the class I'm developing. More on that later. The curriculum development and such is a project for while Keith's out of town.

No Thanksgiving plans yet, which is weird. Usually by now, we're booked to pet-sit and/or have a local gathering scheduled. We are booked for a week or so in December, which will be fun (one cat, one dog). Not over Christmas though, so no idea what's ahead. Matters not. I've got more than enough to keep me busy and I keep acting like I don't. Eesh!

Oh! I forgot to post the link to photos from recent events. Enjoy! We sure did! Also enjoyed a recent visit from an old friend who moved away from LA three years ago. Don't stay away so long next time, Miss Suze!

Guess that's it for now. Not that I've got anything else to do, but I'm out of things to type about that may be of any interest to anyone... so, that's usually when it's best to, well, stop typing. ;) *sigh*

Posted by bonnie at 4:09 AM

October 12, 2003

Happy Nonaversary

Today is our second Nonaversary. We decided last year's was the first and--since we created the holiday to begin with--we get to decide the rules on numbering, celebratory activities, and appropriate gifts.

We will go to paint pottery today. Then lunch at a favorite spot. We started the day with a nice walk. We will end the day with some sort of sex, of course.

Still very very very happy to be unemployed. Or... as I keep saying, "I'm so glad to have my life back!" So, I'm surprised I hadn't imploded during those hideous weeks. I don't remember being so happy and unafraid.

The Book should arrive Tuesday. I'm so very excited. I truly think this book is better than the last (and there's certainly more broadly-accessible information in it) and its pre-sales have shown that I'm not alone in that opinion, though I can't imagine how anyone outside of me and the half-dozen people who've read the dang thing so far could truly KNOW that opinion to be true.

Eh, whatever. I'm just so very happy it's on its way!

Spent my first day of unemployment redesigning the site. Feedback welcome. Also vacuumed, dusted, changed sheets, washed and folded clothes and towels, brushed the cats, organzied a few zillion things that had been piling up due to lack of time to focus on anything other than the evil job, and watched a few cool TV things. A great day.

Congrats to uncle reverend big Mike for the new baby in the family. And Chip, I'm trying not to be really really jealous that you've seen Sir Robyn Hitchcock and REM in the past couple of days.

Ah... have I mentioned how blissfully happy I am? Time for a shower. Then maybe a nap. Just 'cause I can! Ciao!

Posted by bonnie at 8:19 AM

September 1, 2003

AlphaBonBot

When I lived alone, my spice rack was alphabetized. I knew what spices and seasonings I had on hand simply by looking at the rack and reading down to the letter of the alphabet in question and seeing room for something in some recipe somewhere.

Not that I ever cooked.

When I lived alone, my CDs were alphabetized. My video tapes were alphabetized. My books... no, not alphabetized, but certainly grouped by subject matter and then in chronological order by author as needed.

Do I value this sense of order more than my partnership with an amazing man who cooks for me, plays music for me, and selects books to bring to me in the bubble bath when I need time alone?

Not on your life could you think I'd say yes to that.

The alphabet is entirely overrated. So what if we have three (not two, not one... but three) thymes in the cabinet due to lack of OCD-maintenance of the kitchen! Like I'd know what to do with thyme anyway!

Posted by bonnie at 7:24 PM

August 28, 2003

Migraines Suck

Migraines suck, but watching Victoria Principal kick ass in Earthquake does not suck. Or, it sucks in a different way. I like watching scenes shot in my 'hood as it was 30 years ago.

Did I mention I saw The Shootist a couple of weeks ago while in Joshua Tree? I'd never seen it before. BTW, Joshua Tree appears to be washing away. Dang. That's some flooding!

Migraines suck. Too sick to my tummy to do anything, can't see anything for very long before it gets a halo around it, can't sleep because my eye won't stop twitching, and I can't take anything to make it all go away. Grr.

Just grr.

Posted by bonnie at 6:13 PM

August 17, 2003

Good and Bad

Good: home, doing the absolute final checks of index page number match up-ness of the book, in the A/C, full belly, Seinfeld on TV, kitties at my feet, Keith sleeping in the next room while I stay up way too late on the night before starting a new job.

Bad: spent the weekend in Joshua Tree--which, in and of itself was delightful: lots of wonderful conversation and food, blissful exchange of computer services for business taxes and kitty love--where it was at least 120 degrees and A/C was considered an "in case of emergencies" amenity. Car overheated the whole drive home, meaning I cooked in the TicTac for three hours after having cooked all weekend in the desert.

Good: TV Guide finally stopped showing up in my mailbox. My subscription ran out in April (a year later than I'd have liked it to do so, but I'd pre-paid) and the effers kept sending the damn thing for nearly 15 weeks more! So, please note: if you ever want to get TV Guide, you can time that subscription renewal with this information.

Bad: I'm still really hot.

Good: got the book's printing almost all the way financed. THANK YOU, people who know who you are. THANK YOU indeed.

Bad: probably won't sleep before starting my new job tomorrow.

Good: new job's paychecks will pay back all book loan money in just a few weeks.

Bad: I have big plans for overhauling the Blogs, linking old posts, silly stuff like that. What a time waster! But OCD will require its completion. I've spent many many many recent hours making sure all of my contacts in the Palm (really not a Palm... it's a Visor) are also in my Entourage... and vice versa (is it vice-versa? vica-versa? vise-versa? What is it? I recently learned that it's not chomping at the bit. It's champing at the bit! Who knew?!?) and of course, I must also make sure that the categories match up... that even though there is no way to email someone with no email address that those poor people also appear in my mail program... and that everything is all backed up, matched up, and lovely. It's already become a huge pain in the ass, as I've had to add three new people to both places, just since getting home from Joshua Tree. And then there's the issue of Syncing the device with an unstable connection.

Damn technology!

Okay, I didn't mean that.

Back to indexing. Moral of the story: despite the long-ness of the "bad" lists, above, the "good" always always always outweighs it all. I am supremely happy and just obnoxiously thrilled with how my life has turned out. That's got to be annoying to others. Pff.

Oh!! That reminds me!!!

Spied in the desert: PFF Bank and Trust. What? How safe is my money in a place called "pff"?

Also spied: High-Desert Sushi. Ew. I can't even imagine.

And finally, a whole bunch of those cliché-shaped cactus guys that look like (if you put a cowboy hat on them) they're playing cops and robbers. Love those "little" joy-filled things!

Now I'm done.

Posted by bonnie at 10:30 PM

July 22, 2003

Okay, so...

This is what I just posted on the Somesuch-Whatnot group. Reposted here to get the word out, as I'll be out of touch for a goodly bit, it seems.

...it shall be quite a long while before I post again with anything more than a hit and run, methinks.

Today was the last day of our first casting sessions for the feature film I'm casting.

Yesterday, I was asked to provide services as casting consultant for a short film by the end of this week. I have a tape, a script, and a list of roles and candidates for them. I need to give my assessment by week's end.

Tomorrow morning I start my job with Fox for the Brady reality show. Four weeks of work on that, then six weeks on with Project X. That's ten solid weeks of casting work, in an office, in Burbank.

Oh... and today, I was approached at IFP West (where we were doing our casting sessions) by a director who is having trouble casting a role for her feature film. She wants my help.

We have callbacks for this feature on Friday (so, I have that day off from Brady) and then my job will be done. Unless they bring me on to help cast bit parts later, which I would gladly do, as time permits.

My book is nowhere near done, though I do have a few chapters out for proofing (thanks, somesuchers... especially Jamie, the fastest proofer in the USA). I haven't yet listened to the Hollywood Happy Hour audio files in order to determine which clips will make it to the Best Of CD we're supposedly fashioning during hiatus. [So, if anyone wants to listen to them and email me some feedback, I'd sure love to read it.] Oh, and the film festival I co-founded has put out its call for entries. I am both the location for entry deliveries and the screener wrangler.

I am now, officially, booked out of my brain.

And I love it.

I'll miss the daily (or so) contact with y'all, but I will also be thinking of you all very regularly (despite lack of contact). Please know that I love you all and thank you for the overwhelming support you've not only provided ME but that I've witnessed you providing to one another, time and again.

You are what family means.

Thank you for teaching me that.

And with that... I say...

"Woo Hoo!!"

and

"Tee hee."

;)

XXOO

-Bon.

Really not much else to say in the Blog either. Just... wow. I'm so totally living my dreams I can't even stand it! Pretty freekin' cool. Thanks, Mom.

Posted by bonnie at 9:22 PM

July 3, 2003

Box Office Gross

I do not see movies.

Except for when they're brand new. Brand new. BRAND NEW.

See, it's already too late for me to go see Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. I wanted to go early in the day on Wednesday at Mann's Chinese Theatre, but the day got away from us and the date never took place. And now it's too late.

I've now read reviews and heard reviews and, even though no major plot twists have been given away, I now feel as though I cannot see the movie. I mean, I can eventually... just not now.

So, if I ever do see a movie, which sometimes I do, it will always be on opening day, before I've had a chance to hear the buzz that differs from the studio's spin before the movie is out. Once I know what others think of the flick, I know I won't enjoy the movie as much. I'll always watch with a little bit of a nod toward whatever it is I've learned from those other sources, and then feel the need to argue points or to defend things that I, for whatever reason, didn't see the same way the reviewer or well-meaning friend may have.

Since movie-going is supposedly escapism, you can see where that burden of having to defend my likes and dislikes or a movie-maker's intentions does nothing to help me escape. It's just another assignment... and I'm full up.

Posted by bonnie at 4:06 PM

July 2, 2003

A Bit Off

So, I'm guessing that this is an annual thing for me: this malaise, this total boredom combined with an inability to sleep and supreme impatience with myself. Ugh. Don't like it one bit.

We are (well, Keith is, I was) puppy-sitting in Silverlake for 16 days. I had to come on home, though. Seems the neighbors there like to begin celebrating Independence Day early... and by firing their guns into the air. Don't like that. Also... very hot. And no DSL, no cable or DirecTV, no TiVo... (I'm such a tech snob now), which, while very productive for the first week (got lots of work done on the second book... which is now on Amazon.com--good lord, I MUST finish this thing--it's like they believe you when you say you're going to write a book... after you've proven that by writing one already), did not suit me once I got into the absolutely NO sleep thing. So, now back home, still feeling ugh. Glad to know it happens all the time (according to old journals) but also not so glad to have it happen at all.

Anyway, I've received no call that it's "go-time" for the third, fourth, and fifth casting jobs that I was told to plan on, come mid-June or so.

So, today, I sent my resumé out on four possible leads. Hate to move away from something that may come through with that ol' gang I love so much, but dammit, the money has smack run out. I let Katy and Sheila know that I may not be available when they finally do need me. That was hard to do, but also something I had to do, just out of respect for them and for my own prospects. I am definitely in a transitional place right now, and with my birthday coming up, that's not unexpected. As usual, I will celebrate My New Year's Day on July 11th, as January 1st means nothing to me. I have begun listing some resolutions, listing some qualities I care not to bring into the new year with me, etc.

None of that makes me feel any better. It's all just mind taffy at this point, and I'm bored bored bored bored bored.

Oh, I did see the photos of Chip's House and... MAN... yeah, that looks familiar, actually. What was it? There was a time Chip offered me $1000 to clean his house, top-to-bottom, but I had to be topless the whole time. I think the non-topless offer was $500 and I still said no. I did try to organize his comics every time I came over anyway (at least the ones in the bathroom).

Somehow, I think this will make me feel better.

Maybe?

TicTac is still in the body shop (Keith wrecked it two weeks ago) and will be there for at least another week. Grr.

I guess I have a bunch of little things going on that add up to "ugh." And really, any of the little things, alone, would suck a little. All at once and that's a lot of sucking.

Of course, Chip got me hooked on Friendster. Bastid. That's just addictive as all hell.

In news: Hollywood Happy Hour tomorrow. Woo hoo! AND The ActorsBone Flickering Image ShortsFest has put out the call for entries. I'm doing the screener wrangling again this year, so lemmeknow if you want to help out.

I guess that's about it. I really MUST finish that damn book. Sophomore Slump? What is this crap? Ugh.

Posted by bonnie at 8:13 PM

May 4, 2003

Lengthy Update

Wow wow wow wow and wow. I love my new job. LOVE it. LOVE it. And I'm not kidding. I was so sure that I'd be needing to remind myself that I did take this job of my own free will, etc., by now. And I don't need any of that pep-talk. I LOVE this job! How is that possible? I don't do job-jobs! How on earth can I love this so much?

Well, it's the people. Great crew. Really amazing team assembled to put together this show, which makes me very happy. It's sort of like they were able to assemble a dream team and I'm so proud to be on it. Great gang.

Beyond that, I love what I'm doing. Back with Mr. Personality, I was learning the job as I was doing it. And, we've now established, I was doing the job of four people. Yes. Four. It's sort of nice, seeing three other people in the office, sharing the duties I once had heaped upon me, while I "just" do my job. And get paid more. Yeah. I like that. A lot.

It seems as though everyone is also really happy to have me back, since I said no to NBC's Who Wants To Marry My Dad casting between Mr. Personality and Paradise Hotel. I think saying no is a really important element of getting what I want out of life. Leaving Back Stage West was a form of saying no. When I think back to times when I was treated with such extreme disrespect (this is beyond the public recent stuff that everyone knows about and is really awful private stuff that I never told anyone about, as it would make people say, "Why on Earth would you ever stay at such a job??") at the paper, I am really proud of myself for walking away and making what feels like a complete shift in the LEVEL at which I work and am rewarded for my work. The respect I'm getting now is� well� it's about damn time. Let's just say that.

So, yesterday was our big LA open call. Two of the guys who were called back for Mr. Personality came in for it and were given immediate callbacks. Another dear friend's son came in and got an immediate callback too. I'm beaming with pride! So happy for my guys! I also got a few emails from my Mr. Personality guys, asking if they can do this show. Sadly, probably not. Next time, my buddies. Next time!

Blog Responses

Chip: I cannot believe that the Blue Laws even still exist in Georgia. I guess, having lived in Los Angeles for nearly five years, I've gotten really spoiled to the whole "no booze available" on certain days or at certain times. Very odd. But I'm glad they may be on their way out. That's nice!

The Real World: Boston ROCKED! Who told you it didn't? OMG, it was quite possibly the best season ever! Man!

We went to Mann's Chinese Theatre on Friday night for X-2 and it was greatness. I always love seeing an opening night BIG film there, as there are invariably people who worked on the film in the audience. Our screening was shared with at least three people in the closing credits for the film, which was just really cool. Of course, there are a kajillion people in the credits for the show, so the odds are for something like that happening anyway. LOL. As for the film, it was too long for my tastes. Of course, you know me and my lovely inability to sit through any film longer than 82 minutes plus credits. So, for me to say it was only 20 minutes too long is a big deal. I usually will "live with" a film that's ten minutes too long and not say anything about it, but with this one, I started re-editing the film in my mind to make it the length it should've been� while we were still watching it� and that's a sign that there was some stuff that could've been spared. Now, all that said, let me state for the record: this was a really awesome film. I really really really loved it.

I won't bother reviewing it. Surely everyone on the planet has seen it anyway.

Okay, so a trailer I saw that has me really excited is The Italian Job. Didn't think I'd want to see it from the posters, but from the trailer� yeah. I'm in.

Of course, we'll be at the opening night at Mann's for Matrix: Reloaded and T3 in July. Much excitement. That's more movies than I saw at all last year. Hee hee.

I'm amused at the idea of Freshmen living on campus, Chip. Since they'd been threatening that since before I came on campus as a frosh, I'm surprised they're actually going through with it for the 2004 kids. Hm.

You asked about BBS for SpyNotebook. I registered a little EZBoard for Cricket Feet and have never used it, if you want to go poke around and see what you think. My favorite BBS seems to be the one with threaded responses and all posts visible by title. Check the links in the right margin of my Blog for all the BBS places I visit. You'll be able to see lots of options. Good luck deciding. I'll like it, whatever it is. Tee hee.

Okay, can I just say that "April 29th, Inaugural Chicken Day at Athens Academy" is one of the most amusing things ever! Of course, I never forget that Mr. Lee McKay taught us all that there is no such thing as a "first annual" anything, as it must be the "inaugural" version first, and THEN it becomes "annual." Now, if only I can teach my dear cousin that "its = possessive" and "it's = contraction for it is." Sigh. One conquest at a time, right. Hee hee.

Love that my Georgian friends and family got to have an earthquake. One of the PAs at the office is from Georgia and, when I told her about the quake (Joni had sent me an email), she called her family and said (mock panic in her voice), "Why didn't you call me?!? You could be dead!!" When her mom said, "Honey, it was just a little shaking," Amanda said, "Yes. Exactly. Now stop calling me in a panic after every little quake we have out here!" LOL It was great.

Courtney: I am so impressed that you are knitting a scarf. That's just really cool. I have so little patience for such things, and that would be such a nice craft to undertake. Sigh. Someday.

Thanks for the congrats on the Mr. Personality screen capture. That was pretty dang cool for me too. I'm such a geek like that, but it's the kind of thing that my mom would've loved (she'd have paused the tape right there and made everyone that came to the house watch it). So, the capture was sort of a shout-out to her too.

Mike: Good goin'! I'm really impressed that you're at a "finding your place in life" kind of stage. Who says you have to figure it all out on any kind of timeline? I make new stuff up all the time. And I love my life. Enjoy, man! It's hang time!

Other Catching Up

Atkins: I've been on Atkins since December 15th, though I really only "mildly" do it when I'm working at the office. There just aren't a lot of low-carb options brought in, and I can't leave to get my own lunch. Still, I'm doing my best, and I'm certainly burning a buttload of energy in this job, running around all the time. So, I've lost, since December 15th, 25 pounds! Woo hoo!! Yesterday at the open call, Rich (who has known me for well over four years and sees me pretty regularly) asked how much I'd lost, saying, "Damn, you look good, girl!" Love that. So, still 30 to go, for my tastes, but I LOVE that I'm actually succeeding at this! Yay!

Observation: Y'know who gets really nasty when you let your subscription lapse? TV Guide. I'm getting all these nasty "Final Cancellation Notice" warnings and I'm like, "Yes. Please. I hope it is final. I'm sick of hearing from you." I'm sure they're losing a lot of subscriptions due to DirecTV's on-screen info, TiVo's program guides, and online access to program grids. Oh well.

So, TiVo, yes� I have become reacquainted with the greatness that is Family Guy. Wow. What a great show! I knew it anyway, but I'm really loving it this time around. The Boomtown marathon on Bravo is outstanding. I am so very happy that FCC regulations on syndication sales into cable channels don't hold anymore. This instant rerun thing has been such a pleasure with the current season of Law & Order: Criminal Intent on USA and now Boomtown on Bravo� wow. I want to write for Boomtown. I think I'll save a few more eps and do some research. I'm probably nowhere near qualified to do crime drama writing, but I sure do love that show's writing. I'm really impressed with a script written by Mykelti Williamson about a child who was molested by a coach and grew up to pass that same legacy on to other children. I'm actually going to write to him, to see about some joint venture action. I've learned, based on some very recent connections with industry folk, that it is highly appropriate to reach out to people whose work you admire, say so, and then move forward with some collaborations. I have a few things going on right now about which I'm very excited. It's just a really, seriously, really good time these days. 'Nuff said.

Bummer: 90210 skipped a season. Dangit. I'm getting Kelly post-fire, Val with Dylan in Mexico hunting down his money, and Andrea in love with some med student. Last week, Brenda was cast in the play and Laura hadn't even tried to kill herself yet. Grr. How dare the skip the whole evolution of David and Clare's relationship or the departure of Brenda and the reveal that Val's a pothead! Grr, indeed.

TicTac: My baby car passed the Smog Check! Woo hoo! I was worried, since it failed a few years ago when I had it tested the first time, and it's� well� older now. Nearly 14 to be exact. "Bless its widdle heart," as Mom would say.

Chicklet: That's the name for my baby G4. It's so great! And it's earning a living too. Just learned I get $50/wk. for allowing the production company to use it (via me) for the show. So, we're both on the payroll. Nice. Problem is, it has a wobble. Any other PowerBook owners having this issue? And what are your thoughts on it? Should I just deal?

Dreams: My daytime ones are beautiful. My nighttime ones are deception, anxiety, accountability related stuff. Weird. I think it's all the carbs.

Check the Cricket Feet Calendar for goings-on I won't have time to email out with any regularity, and make sure you visit the Hollywood Happy Hour site for the recap of May 1st's event and scoop on the June 5th event to come. I should have it updated shortly. I hope. It was great fun, as always!

'Til my next day off�

Posted by bonnie at 2:21 PM

April 15, 2003

Taxed

For the first time in my life, I have not filed taxes yet.

I understand that my tax lady has filed an extension on my behalf--and man, do I hope she did it not just for my company, but also for me personally.

Eesh. It's very strange for me to ease up on the controls of something so important and trust that it's all being taken care of and that I'm not going to be in some big trouble or something.

Yes, I fear the IRS. Yes, I usually have everything filed, signed, paid, or collected and cashed by February 28th. No time for that, this year.

Is this what growing up is like?

Don't answer that.

Posted by bonnie at 4:54 AM

February 15, 2003

Fear Based

I'm afraid to post this out loud.

In fact, I'm going to put this article up quietly and then slink out of town for a few days to see if I can get away with saying all of this without causing much of a stir.

I think I may be turning into a Republican.

*cringe*

Now, I know it's not possible for me to ever really be a Republican, as I am a huge sucker for human rights, civil rights, reproductive freedom, domestic partnership legislation, federally funded programs for school lunches and the arts, and all that jazz. But...

I want a war.

So far, all of my way liberal friends (among whom I've stood at many a rally, fundraiser, or protest over the years) are coming out way anti-war. They want peace and they want it now.

I want Dubya to push the magic button and blow some shit away.

I'm tired of being tense over when the next strike against Americans will take place. I'm tired of being anxious after hearing the three thousandth story on the local news about how to properly duct tape ourselves into our homes and eat foods we've learned how to grow in our windowsill gardens. I'm tired of wondering just how many more suicide bombings in America-friendly locales have to take place before someone with some fucking firepower takes out the assholes who have the audacity to say that the space shuttle's deterioration on reentry was an act of a God who knows how evil America is.

Every time I hear a low-flying airplane, I am certain it's headed into the Hollywood sign just above my home and that it's being hit simultaneously with the Golden Gate Bridge, the Gateway Arch, and the Statue of Liberty.

I am sick of living in fear.

And, because being sick of living in fear means I want some action taken before the next attack on us, I live cloaked in a second layer of fear: that of being an un-closeted Republican.

Well... whatever. If my pro-war (and pro-right this fucking second) mentality makes me an evil Republican on the matter, I'll take it. I can joke every day about "not letting the terrorists win" and seeing the Terror Alert scale go from Bert to Ernie in color, but that doesn't mean that I'm not scared to death of living in this post-9/11 world of ours.

And to walk around with that fear... when we could just annihilate the source and be done with it?? Well, call me short-sighted. Perhaps I am. But after a year and half of looking over my shoulder as if a rapist is on my heels again, I'm exhausted.

Go get 'em, boys. Spank those fuckers down. Now.

Posted by bonnie at 2:51 AM

February 5, 2003

(Low Carb) Catch-Up

Goodness gracious, it has been quite a few days! Busy, but happily so, as usual. I've learned that my body likes three hours of sleep for every ten hours awake, if possible. When that doesn't happen, I sleep for about six hours and then am up for 20. That means there's no telling when I'll be sleeping. That's proved interesting, to say the least, when trying to conduct a little business with normal people.

Who am I kidding? I know very few normal people.

Okay, so Hollywood Happy Hour is up and running. We had a meeting Monday night at the site for our first event (March 6th) and it went just great. We are really gearing up!! In preparation for our live event, we're doing a discussion forum and mailing list thing. Feel free to come join us! It's a blast, thus far.

Atkins eating is doing well for me, it seems. Finally broke down and bought a scale, so that I'm not always counting on showing up at some person's apartment and sneaking into their bathroom to use theirs in order to check my progress. So, according to the scale, I'm down 15 pounds (and as many inches) since starting Atkins just over seven weeks ago. That's pretty dang cool. Keith and I started really sticking to an exercise pledge this month and we really are supporting one another really well. Also, it's like the only time we get to spend together, since my sleep cycles are so out of whack. Oh, and Keith (damn those boys) has lost 30 pounds so far!! Sheesh! He only has about ten more to go. I, however, cannot say the same.

Okay, time to catch up on some blogs and such. Bear with me.

Chip said: Susan and I are writing a pilot for a TV series. I doubt this will go past the story treatment stage but we might actually write the script. Still too many details to work on before I write more here. Susan says she can't work with me because she gives ideas and then I boil them down to "It's Deadline meets Freakylinks with some Boston Public and My So-Called Life thrown in. I just do it to annoy her.

Chip, you do realize that that is EXACTLY how concepts are pitched to studios and networks here, right? You are totally on the path to Hollywood. Let Susan keep feeding you ideas, you keep boiling them down to hybrid concepts and loglines (25-word descriptions) and you will be ready to pitch next season!

Oh... and make sure you write everything down.

Courtney, I love the concept of the curtains you're making. The whole idea of beading and fringing and ribboning those plain sheets on hoops with clips... wow. You're right. Pure genius. Please do share photos. As for the other stuff in your blog... please know you can always count on your friends and family to help you out. Take care of you and the rest will fall into place. We love you.

Big Mike, Shelley is right. I don't know you, so that's why I haven't commented on the Armida situation either. I have no business advising you, as I don't know anything more than what *I* would do in such a situation. And you're not me, nor would you want to be. Just please be careful. Shelley, good goin', girl.

Happy Belated Birthday, Trevor!! You're still my favorite BLUE!

Oh, dear God, how much do I love that article you found on the cult of the Franklin Planner. I am SO there! One of the hardest things I ever had to do was trade in my planner for my Handspring Visor. Well, technically, I traded it in for a reconditioned Palm Pilot, then upgraded to a Visor the next year. Point is, I still miss my planners. Desperately. They were such a source of happiness for me. I wrote in different color inks, I used them as journals, I put stickers inside them, taped in motivational quotes and photographs of every celeb I spied. I miss that. Truly. If it weren't for the 2243 contacts in my Visor (organized, categorized, sorted, and backed up on my iBook), I'd probably go back. Ah... simpler times.

Trevor, how did you have the patience to scan all of those photos? I brought home boxes of photographs from Mom's house on our trip in May and my goal was to get all of the photos scanned, named (in some organized fashion), and burned to CDs by around December 2008. I still think that's an attainable goal, but I'm beginning to think that I'll have to employ someone else to do the actual scanning. It's just too monumental a task for me to undertake with any passion. What do you recommend, seeing as you've been down that path with some success?

And may I just say, Trevor, this quote of yours is top-notch. It isn't that the planner puts me in control of my world, but rather that I can dynamically react to the chaos that is my life. Brilliant.

Jocelyn, my dear, this is the saddest thing I've read lately. Head coach of high school told my cheerleaders they needed to have three priorities in life. 1. Get married (my stomach turns even writing it), 2. Have babies (oh my god they're in 7th grade!!!), 3. Win state championships (I think I might puke).

Good lord. God bless the south.

Also, Jocelyn, you mentioned wanting a summer job in California. Lemmeknow what industry you want to work in and I'll see if I can hook you up. I know some people, and beyond that, I know some places to contact with your resumé, based on what you want to do while you're here. I think one of my former Athens Academy students is coming out here this summer to do some journalist type job. I'm so proud. *sniff* My little girl's grown up!

And with that, I'll sign off for now. Must get back to paying work. Be well, everyone! And XXOO to you all.

Posted by bonnie at 7:30 AM

Best Dressed

Have you ever been in love? I mean really in love? I have.

Soft to the touch, pleasing to the eye, absolutely flattering and sure to garner compliments whenever I wore it: my mustard yellow lambswool mock turtleneck sweater from the Tweeds catalog.

I bought it in 1988 along with an oxblood above-the-knee pleated skirt. I wore those two pieces along with my charcoal grey opaque tights and black penny loafers (the left shoe had a 1970 penny, given to me by my cousin Joni, and the right had a 1988 penny, on my person at the time Joni suggested the idea of one foot representing the year of my birth, the other the year of my graduation).

Whenever I wore this outfit, I was in high-confidence mode. I remember wearing it, with an oversized grey blazer, when I went to my audition for MTV's Remote Control in January of 1989. I had lost ten pounds over Christmas Break from college, and my, "I will not ride the bus to the dining hall" pledge had ensured that I had not gained the freshman fifteen in my first quarter of studies at the University of Georgia. I looked HOT. And the crowd's reaction during my audition segment proved that fact.

That sweater, when I pulled it out of the closet last month, had two little holes in it--the work of eager silverfish that found their way into my life. I tried to mend the sweater, but it was no use. The damage had been done, and the sweater now--15 years after it entered--would leave my life.

I actually wept.

But here's the real reason why--just so you won't think me more a freak than you already do.

Tweeds is no longer in business.

I populated my wardrobe with Tweeds clothing from the discovery of its catalog in 1988 all the way up until 1999, when I received word that they were discontinuing the catalog and going web-based only. I was disappointed to hear that, as was the phone operator in North Carolina who delivered that blow while I placed my order from an office across from Mann's Chinese Theatre, where I worked at the time. She agreed that we like holding the catalog, flipping through, folding down page corners, even cutting out pictures we like to come up with ideas for coordinating looks.

I received my order in June, 1999, of a periwinkle blue, ribbed, wrap/tie sweater, a black pair of shimmery dress pants, and the coolest black strappy sandals I have ever owned in my life. I think the order cost $99 including shipping and handling. I *still* wear those sandals, even though they are really ready for retirement. They are just that perfect.

And that's just it. Everything Tweeds sold was like that in my life. I have so many pieces of clothing by Tweeds that I still pull out and wear--many more pieces that are waiting for me to lose enough weight to wear them again--and they look like new. They are so well-made, so lovely, and in such delicious colors and fabrics that I just adore them all for the works of art that they are.

And now that they're rare, since there are no more Tweeds clothes to be had, they mean that much more to me.

The website for Tweeds did have a little "We'll launch with the Spring 2000 Collection" message up for most of 1999. For most of 2000, the site had no message, just an image of a woman wearing impeccably beautiful clothing. In 2001, the site redirected to its parent company's site, where no mention of Tweeds could be found. And last year, the domain name was for sale. *sniffle*

Tragic, really.

I will never understand why my dear Tweeds is no more. I know that I certainly could've kept them in business, if the thousands of dollars in business I gave them over the years is any indication.

All this to say, when you see me in a too-snug, slightly worn, lovely colored, well-tailored piece of clothing, please don't ask where I got it. I might just cry.

Posted by bonnie at 7:03 AM

January 28, 2003

A Day Like Today

I live in a place where tourists stop every day. Just this morning, after taking Keith to the airport before the sun came up, I decided to travel back along the Lake Hollywood route, which allows me to get as close as vehicularly possible to the Hollywood sign. As I rounded the curve and came up underneath the H, glowing against the faint light of the oddly bright crescent moon, I thought, "I could just park here and watch this all day long."

Later in the morning, I ran errands that, during the weekend I'd bitched about not completing on Friday. As I waited at the intersection of Hollywood and Vine for the light to change, watching pedestrians stopping to photograph stars on the Walk of Fame beneath them, I thought, "I could just park here and watch this all day long."

This afternoon, I received a call from a casting director, asking me to come to his class at UCLA next week and speak to the students, talk with him about the class, make some plans for structuring my own curriculum, and such. I then received an email from another casting director, thanking me for helping her with a particular project she's working on. Then I watched Bravo's "The It Factor" and saw actors going into casting sessions with casting directors I've interviewed. I thought, "I like this life. What I do is cool."

I got an email from an actress who wanted to thank me for the advice I'd given her that has now led to her increased confidence in her audition situations. I told her that she's the one who has to go do the hard work. All I have are ideas and theories and experiences that worked for me. I can share those. And I can wish her well. The rest is up to her.

What's my point?

Well, it's really easy to forget the love of the day-to-day sometimes. I hear that I'm lucky to be able to do what I love for a living. I really don't think luck has anything to do with it. I busted my ass to get to live the way I do, and it's been a series of hard choices that have cost me some close relationships in the process. And, in the big scheme of things, I don't really mind.

Even when my day is composed of nothing "Hollywood" (when I go for a walk in my neighborhood and forget to look up at the sign), I still manage to find a patch of clover or some pretty little flower that thinks it's Spring, and I stop, and think, "I could just park here and watch this all day long."

And not take any of it for granted.

Posted by bonnie at 1:48 AM

January 21, 2003

Commercial Unrest

I watch a lot of TV. A lot. A lot, a lot, a lot.

And since I am not blessed with TiVo, I must also watch commercials. Of course, I do my best to time just about any other activity for commercial breaks, but when I do catch a commercial, a few things can happen.

I can say, "Oh, so-and-so auditioned for that one!" or "Hey, that's so-and-so!" or, as is the case with the examples that follow, I can stand up and scream at my television, "What the eff were you people thinking?!?"

I don't understand ad execs. I really don't. I suppose, if I did, I'd have done more than take one advertising course each in undergrad and grad school at the Grady College of Journalism (go, Dawgs) at UGA. And then, perhaps, I'd have become one of those odd little ad execs and lined my pockets with dollars made off of some of the stupidest ideas ever conceived. Instead, I get paid dunkets to share others' stupid ideas with you in the form of a rant.

What I've Learned from Commercials

Lie to your friends. When given the opportunity, make sure you lie. Your roommate asks whether you wore her black top last night. You flashback to the amazing party time you had, dancing away, wearing her black top, but recall (thanks, voiceover) that you used Secret, and therefore did not leave white marks on said black top... making it impossible for your roommate to know the truth.

Don't lie to your girlfriend. When she asks if you've been wearing that black sweater she sent you, tell her yes, you wear it every time you think of her... and when she guesses that it must be "so grey" due to all the times that would mean it's been washed, you can hang up the phone, cut the tags off the unworn sweater, run panicking to the laundry room, and... uh, oh... all you have is Cheer, and that won't fade your dark clothing. Busted.

Lose your gag reflex. If you ever want to shoot a commercial for Carl's Jr. and their new chili burger... well, you'd better be able to not puke during filming. (From what I hear, on the set, it's quite all right to do so after, "Cut!" is hollered, but that's it.) I get that we're supposed to think, "Mmm, yummy... big, sloppy burger with chili overloaded to overflowing." Okay. I've never enjoyed the whole "listening to someone eat something" hook to their ads, but with this one, where the chick sits down, positions the box the burger came in to have it catch the chili that spills off toward the floor, licks the edges of the burger to get what extra chili she can, and then "plop" again... more chili in the box... I just don't get how that's supposed to make anyone want to go buy that burger.

Have questionable anatomy. This one has long been a favorite. "My sister and I were at the gym and I got my period. I asked to borrow a pad, but she only had tampons." Let me state, for the record, that I know feminine hygiene ads are just about as bad as those Viagra ads I refer to as the "Bob's Boner" campaign (thank God Saturday Night Live... or was it MadTV... finally spoofed that one). But this one, from Playtex, includes the lovely tag line, "They're so comfortable--you can't even feel them." Them? How many are you putting in?!?

Mistreat your body and then brag about it. It started up after New Year's Day, as most "fix yourself up" ad campaigns do. This one is the Bally Fitness "feel the beautiful pain" series of commercials. Are you kidding me? Honestly, at first, I thought, "Nah... that can't be their campaign. Really. It's gotta be a one-shot, New Year's Resolution type ad deal." Oh, no. It's a whole roll-out campaign based on the premise, "I hurt so bad from my workout that I can't even move." The stupid one-shots of the actors describing the "morning after pain" was a bad enough ad, but now the almost public service announcement-tone one with the woman who "tragically can't cross the street today" because of the pain of the "amazing workout" she had the day before? Ugh! Please, ad execs, be a bit more responsible!

Use disclaimers liberally. I've always liked the little Zoloft ad campaign with the little blobby moving across the screen, interacting with a ladybug. It wasn't until a 17-year-old writing student I knew mentioned it to me that I noticed something really amazing about this ad, in which--remember--an animated blobby moves across the screen and then an animated drawing of the serotonin reuptake process taking place is shown--includes the all-important notice at the bottom of the screen: "Dramatization." Wow. Really? You mean my brain is not functioning as a cartoon?

Well. Maybe that's my problem right there.

Posted by bonnie at 6:56 AM

January 4, 2003

Well, Crap

So... I was booked on the radio show Back Stage Live for tonight. I was really looking forward to it. Good fun. Live talk radio. Happy stuff.

Instead... I go and get strep throat. Jealous? Ugh. Me no likee.

Of course, I can't rest for any length of time, because every time I do try to rest, I start thinking of all the stuff I want to deal with on the computer. Then I get to the computer and feel too sick to even sit up and compose anything.

Oh! And the chick who hit my parked car on either New Year's Eve or early New Year's Day, despite the fact that she left a sweet note about paying for the damages, has not returned a single phone call since we went and got the estimate. So... I'm thinking, either she didn't actually hit the car, but someone else did and left a note with her name and number "for fun" or that, once she heard the estimate (Keith left it on her voicemail), she decided to back out. Or... she's just busy. Yeah. Whatever.

Thinking it may be time to post her name and number on the freekin' Internet. We'll see.

First I need to feel better.

Oh, here's something I was going to post yesterday.

So Very Human

Got a call from a casting director whose name I changed in 75% of our interview in the book. She said she liked the book very much, but that she didn't like being renamed. Of course, I'm thinking, "Like once or twice, right?" Oh no... I renamed her EIGHTEEN TIMES in our five-page interview.

Got some comfort from a multi-published friend who said, "No matter how many times it's been proofed, something is always going to get through." Ugh! But something THIS big? Of course, it makes me feel like the whole book is useless. Gotta love that all-or-nothing mentality I seem to embrace.

So, now instead of doing a straight reprint from this edition when this print-run sells out (which, based on the figures we just received from our distributors for December alone, should be quite soon), we'll have to do $15/page edits and perhaps not even be allowed to call it a revised first edition without issuing a new ISBN, bar code, etc. Ugh. "Oh, bother," as Pooh would say!

Okay, I think that's everything for now. Yeah. Photos from New Year's Day to come. Just have to feel better first. Recommendations for personal health care here would be greatly appreciated. Cheers,

Posted by bonnie at 10:54 AM

December 31, 2002

Change Is... Well, Change

What was it that Garth said in Wayne's World? Something like, "We fear change," while pummeling a robotic arm with a mallet. Then there was the greatness of Roseanne, in which Darlene had a new boyfriend. Roseanne's take, "Change bad! No new people!"

Yeah, I get that.

But then I look at the things in life that have come about as a result of some painful nudge in the change direction and I am truly happy.

It's been a tough year for many people around me, and for me at times too. But wow, what a great year it has been! How is that? *shrug* Not a clue. But I'm not alone. I'm seeing a lot of people who could say, easily, that this was a horrid year, saying instead that they have blessings beyond their anticipation. Maybe it's that joy-filled glass-half-full way of looking at life that makes any of us continue on, ever.

Well, one thing that won't change, for me, is the incessant need to cite pop culture (and mostly television... and mostly Beverly Hills, 90210: The Brenda Years) in making my points. Get used to that. If that somehow feels offensive to you, please take a look at the attempted Pop Culture Challenge Chip and some friends took once upon a time.

Not pleasant.

Okay, so one of the changes that I'm embracing today is my new Atkins lifestyle. Yes, I know, I hear all about how controversial Atkins eating can be. I know that many people find the "discard the recommended food pyramid" idea to be scary and even crazy. Hell, my government has mislead me before... perhaps their plan to fill me with grains is wrong. Who knows?

But I've been doing Atkins induction since December 15th. So far; down ten pounds and 13.5 inches (four of them from my waist). Say what you will about the wisdom of this lifestyle... I'm losing weight and my energy level is outrageously high (and not manic, either). I'll take it!

I'm not going to spend my time Blogging about my diet. That's pretty boring, and only a fraction of what my life is, really. What I'm going to do here is give you my take on the world, and that will include all manner of things. Enjoy! Or not.

Posted by bonnie at 2:19 PM

December 21, 2002

Dreaming about Chip

So...I just woke up from a pretty involved dream about Chipper (my former beau, coworker, and all around dang cool guy with great toys and the best family on the planet). Decided I'd better get on up and share the dang thing in case any of this means anything to anybody (including me, later in life).

The dream is in italics, so's no one gets confused when skimming this (especially me).

Starts off (I think) with me heading back to Athens to attend some big technology conference that somehow also involves small domestic and farm animals.

I am catching up with Chip and learn that he has decided to leave our dear Athens Academy and go back to school.

While I'm going around gathering items (mostly papers, files, notes) I've discovered I left behind when I left my job at the Academy in 1998, I realize that there is some interviewing going on on the lawn (like we're "Live on the White House Lawn" or something) so I have to step around the outside of the house and be careful not to get in the line of the shot.

I notice, near the porch, Aunt Missy's chicken. Apparently, it's won all sorts of awards for whatever chickens win awards for doing. I continue gathering papers, decide that some of them must come home with me, as it's likely I'll be returning to UGA for my PhD, if I can just get the student loan people to let me piggyback on the loans I already have from the Master's degree. The chicken clucks along beside me and then Charlotte scoops it up and tells me its play time is over.

I realize that Chip has gone inside and go to meet him there. Before I can get off the lawn, Susan hands me a 2003 City of Athens calendar, which has a picture on the cover of her bathing the chicken in a bathtub surrounded by a green-tiled wall. I learn that is Aunt Missy's house and think, "Hm...that means all the family members have bathed there." (Not sure what that's about.)

I head back into the house, thanking Susan for the calendar, and find Chip in a room with Mike Callinan and Ron Powell. They are all on computers, trying to get Chip registered for a class (partnered with Melissa Edwards) where they will get a set of twins at the beginning of the semester and get to try their hands at parenting for a grade. I ask Chip how registration is going and he says, "Slow. You know the system."

He then encourages me to register for classes, asking, "Do you have a way to get into the system?" I say, "I have a copy of Nifty Telnet on my iBook. Will that do?"

And that's how the dream ended.

Any thoughts??
--
Bon
The Book Is Here!

More greatness: "Speaking of which, I am against advertising prescription meds to patients. The Purple Pill is not my business anymore than Bebe shirts are." - Stephanie W., on SpyNotebook, Nov. 2002

Posted by bonnie at 6:44 AM

December 7, 2002

Long Overdue, Long Blog

I'm watching The Osbornes rerunning on MTV and I am having a blast watching Ozzy battling his addictions. Me too, man. "I always try sober in the worst possible conditions." Yup. Sharon's chemotherapy treatments are in the same facility where I spent many, many hours with Dawn this year. There's Gabriel. Loved him. Oh, and the back of Angela's head... I recognize her voice. Angels, those people at the Tower Oncology Group!

We're in the month that Mom died. I'm pretty clear that I'll spend the month weepy and reserved. I have scheduled some hefty social obligations for myself this month in an attempt to keep myself from never getting out of bed. Wish me luck! Had a good time at last night's VNU Publications Holiday Party. Glad I went. Almost didn't. We walked to Hollywood Blvd. to the lovely Henry Fonda Music Box Theatre. Lovely.

Keith and Rich taped the game show Lingo yesterday. They won! So, that'll be a nice little influx of cash. The new season begins on the 9th, so we'll be looking for their episode (episode?) and certainly tape it. I'm proud of my beau. Oh, he also had a very cool encounter with Tim Curry at the market this morning. Tim was SURE he recognized Keith from some film or TV show. Keith assured him, "Not yet. But you will," and gave him his card. Greatness.

I have responses to make to other Bloggers who've stirred... well, responses in me.

I am so very sad that Glenn Quinn has died.

That's me with Glenn and a friend who used to live in LA, Heather. We met up with the "Angel" cast at karaoke one night and ended up back at David Boreanaz's house 'til 5am. He's the one who took the photograph. Anyway... I'm just really sad about Glenn.

Oh, Chip, I am so very happy that SpyNotebook is back up and running. It was a sad few Blog-free days there. Thrilled you received the book and that you already feel ready to move to Hollywood to become a famous actor. I fully support you in that goal! Seriously, I hope you like the book. Lemme hear what you think of it, okay? Oh, why isn't there an all-local Athens radio station? At least WUOG does "Sound of the City" still, right? Man, I miss my radio days.

Courtney, baby! LOVED the T'giving photos. I'll put ours up soon. Oh, you said, "I kicked myself for not swerving off the freeway the other night to take down ideas when inspiration hit." A suggestion: carry a micro cassette recorder in the car with you. I used to do that when I was doing a ton of driving, and I'd speak my story ideas into the thing so that those thoughts weren't lost due to my need to commute. Try that. Hey, what'd you think of the casting in "Thirteen Conversations about One Thing," Courtney? I interviewed the casting director for that film and will probably meet with her again when I'm in New York to promote the book (nothing scheduled yet). So glad you enjoyed the Jury Duty Blog. Pretty interesting process, eh?

Of course, I am completely obsessed with finding out how the trial went. It should be over by now, and I really want to know the details of the case and whether the young woman was found guilty or not. Can't find a dang peep about it online or in any newspaper. Are murder trials so very common that there is no ink wasted on their outcomes anymore?

Anyway, back to Courtney, thank you for the congrats and hurrah on the book. I am very proud and less freaked out about the fact that it's here and it's been such a huge investment on so many levels. It's very exciting to hear Keith's tales of the reactions casting directors are having, when he drops off their copies of the book. They are very pleased. I hope actors will be too, when the book is finally for sale in bookstores on January 10th.

Miss Jocelyn, thank you too for enjoying the Jury Duty Blog. As for Hello Kitty goodies, the best places to buy are the tiny little shops here in LA. Of course, any heavily-Asian-populated neighborhood should have a respectable Mom & Pop Shop filled with those hard-to-find, non-corporate, original Hello Kitty treasures. The other day on CNN I saw a story about Hello Kitty's top holiday gifts, including the toaster, CD player, purse, and the standard stationery kits. The cool part was that there was a life-sized Hello Kitty costume on some poor kid standing silently next to the reporter. "Hey, I recognize that costume! I sold mine, identical to that one, on eBay for $225 in 1998." Sometimes I miss that big ol' Kitty Head hanging out in my apartment.

Anyway, to answer your question: online tends to be a better and better place to find the steals on hard-to-find Hello Kitty goodies, if you don't have the chance to go down to Little Five Points or something nouveau trendy like that. Hey, since when does the Engine Room do late night Thanksgiving dinner? Man, that's a whole new Engine Room! Oh, you asked about the 20/20 story. I had Blogged about it before... hm, probably in the neighborhood of November 8th, which is when the report aired. Basically, it was an undercover exposé on casting director workshops, these events where actors pay to get to meet casting directors (who, BTW, are already paid by studios and production companies to meet actors). I'm looking forward to a follow-up report. There will be one, most certainly.

I went to see Ray Charles in Atlanta once. Fox Theatre. He was great! Did you enjoy the concert, Jocelyn? Oh, and I don't know whether the letters in "Alias" spell Vaughn, but I'd vote that's a good choice, if they're spelling anything at all (I'd guess they are and that there is someone online who has figured out some sort of code).

Tina, did you find it amazing that when Sean Blogs (like Nov. 19, Sept. 15, and July 6), there is ALWAYS some comment about "Reigns of Fire" in it? Maybe that's just me. I think the boy is fixated.

BrYan, "Damn Good Dog" indeed. Go Dawgs! And I hear ya on the delightful cheapness of drinks in Athens vs. anywhere else on the planet. Of course, here you can buy a cup of coffee (plain, normal, black coffee) for $4. So, I'm not even going to think about the days when I could go ALL OUT and do the town for $12 in Athens. Ah, sentimental old fool I am.

Okay, I'll try to bring my head up from under the covers every now and then to Blog a bit. I'm just sad. Miss my Mom. Sad about the friends I've lost this year, the family relationships that have completely disintegrated, and trying very hard to NOT think that it all has something to do with all that is wrong with me. After this many losses (especially the losses of choice) in a short period of time, I am inclined to believe that my faults are the ones driving people away. Faith was here yesterday for several hours and she made it absolutely clear that THAT was just not true. I love her. It's good to have a friend for 18 years.

Anyway, I try to do what Mom would do and focus on the lesson at all times. The lesson, the lesson, the lesson. And then it becomes okay that people fall away because it is all a part of some character-building exercise, leading to the complete Bonniness that I will be someday. So I have to see all the pain as a gift. Period.

Ugh. Shouldn't Blog when depressed. Worry not, readers, I'm good. This is all expected December lifestyle stuff for me. I have a project starting up next week that will give me something on which to obsess... and for once I think that will be a very very very smart use of my energy.

Cheers,

-Bon.
More genius from Rose: "Information wants to be free, as long as it's properly credited. Or even if it's not." - November, 2002, Somesuch-Whatnot

Posted by bonnie at 6:08 PM

November 27, 2002

Redefining Boredom

So, I get up Tuesday morning (okay, so it was 12:20pm, what of it?) and decide that I'll do just a little online whatnot before cutting myself off from the Internet long enough to get all of the non-Internet but very much computer-oriented things done that I must do before my Wednesday at the office and the subsequent dead-days for anyone in any office with whom I need to connect.

I'm in the middle of something pretty dang involved and important (natch) when the power goes out (at 1:22pm). Now, since I elected to pay my student loans this month rather than allocate that money to the purchase of a new battery for the iBook, everything goes bye-bye. I sigh. These things happen. The Santa Ana winds, in addition to raising the temp up above 90 degrees in the last couple of days, have knocked down trees and branches, causing intermittent outages all over town. I am patient. I go outside and chat up the landlady while she waters her plants.

At about 1:50pm, we get power back. For two minutes. Back out again. For the long haul.

I catch up on my reading, and in an hour a stack of "to read later" copies of Daily Variety are read, interesting pieces relating to my world torn out and put aside. I pick up my "Correction Copy" of Casting Qs and resume finding the nit-pickiest corrections to make upon the revised printing (18 months away--but it's never too early to find fault with a product everyone is excited about). I know, by now, Keith is calling me to check in, let me know how well the drop-offs are going, see if I want a Smoothie brought home, etc. Of course, no one can reach me. I have no phone access due to the use of a cordless phone as our only phone-like source and the fact that no cell phone reception exists within a block of my apartment, on my cute little Visorphone. Can't get email, of course, due to the fact that I have no computer battery and... well the DSL box probably requires power too. Unreachable is kind of nice.

By 4pm, I realize there is nothing I'll be able to do in the apartment without creating some sort of light. So, I begin rigging up some flashlights (these cute little ones Keith got from the Saturn commercial he shot this summer...they were used as headlights in that world without cars spot), which--when shone onto the ceiling--do a fair job of lighting up the room. A little later, I will begin lighting candles and making sure there is a flashlight placed in locations I may need light later. I go back out and chat with the neighbors--there are now several of us hanging around, speculating on how far-reaching this particular outage is. One neighbor asks what I write and I tell him about the book. Suddenly, all my neighbors have a copy of the book. Good karma. I don't bake, so that's gotta be the neighborly thing I do, dammit.

As I've opened the screen door to hand over a book or two, Archie decides he needs to run out of the house (for the first time in his life) and bolt under some bushes. I grab him by the tail (I know, I know) and drag him back inside. I go outside and sit with my neighbors. Archie puts his claws into the screen door--stretching as high as he can reach--to let me know something isn't normal about this day.

Keith comes home, running in, out of breath, "Is something wrong with the phone?!?" "Yes, dear. It requires electricity." He looks around and suddenly understands the dark block, the dark apartment building, the dark apartments. Reminds me of that episode of "Roseanne" in which Jackie makes her entire breakfast at Roseanne's with no power, not realizing the blender, the microwave, and the fridge all have something in common until she calls and checks her messages, hearing Roseanne explain why they need candles. Roseanne observes, "Well, we now know the speed of stupid." Tee hee. I giggle and Keith doesn't know why. That's okay. My brain is happy for the laugh.

Keith heads out again to a casting director drop-off, but he'll return to grab a stack of books (to sell at the casting director's class in half an hour) and head out again. He assures me that, when he gets home, he'll cook a casserole for us, as we have one of those kits in the cupboard and our oven is gas. "Cool," I think, realizing that it is now coming up on 7pm and I am going to miss the (east coast feed) season premiere of "The Osbornes." Boo hiss.

I walk through the area with our landlady, lighting a few candles in preparation of neighbors coming home and needing to see their way to their front doors. Keith returns (with another $80 in sales) and we pack up the studio lot drop-offs for mailing, as he's met with little success gaining lot access to drop off copies of the book there. Good use of non-technology enhanced living. It's over too soon and I'm bored.

Keith learns, after taking the oven apart, that it includes a handy electric starter, and therefore protects the pilot light from being, well, lit unless electrically induced. So, he heads out, yet again, for a drive-thru dinner. I think he put the oven back together. I decide not to check. Are you feeling the foreshadowing?

At 9:30pm, we decide it's best just to go to bed. I have to work at the paper in the morning and MUST use the computer for a couple of hours before I leave, meaning I'll have to wake up really early, since we've been told not to expect power before midnight. Asleep quickly, then probably around 11pm, I hear power start back up (the ceiling fan comes on, the phone beeps, the alarm on the computer network sounds to make sure we know it's been using backup reserves). Keith mumbles, "Power's on." "I want to stay asleep." "Me too." So we do. Until 1am, when I'm up, too curious to not head back to the computer--but more than that, REALLY hot. I mean WAY hot. And since the Santa Anas have died down, the temperature is nowhere near the high level of the weekend...so why is it sweltering in here?

I enter the living room, turn on the computer, and head into the kitchen for some water. Ah. There's the source of the heat. Keith has left the oven on 400 degrees, and it has been baking air for at least two hours. Well, I guess it's good to know that the oven, at 400 degrees for two hours, can heat the whole apartment, all the way back to the bedroom.

Insert "good thing I love this man" eye roll here.

So, that's how my day without power went. Did I mention an email inbox filled with, "Where the hell are you?!?" messages? Yeah. That's good fun. I think I'll send folks, as a reply, a link to this here Blog. Yeah, that's an efficient choice.

Peace.
--
Bon
The Book Is Here!
Free Casting Director Panel Dec. 11th, 7:30pm

"The fact that Susan and Sean were drinking Pepsi leads me to believe that there was at least one person trying to annoy another. On the positive side, it wasn't in Ottawa." - David's brilliance in SpyNotebook, Oct. 2002

Posted by bonnie at 2:09 AM

November 22, 2002

Jury Duty-a-go-go, 11/21/02

7:48am - Keith drops me at 555 W. Temple. Jury duty is at 7:45am at 210 W. Temple. Oops. Glad I wore tennis shoes.

8am - Long line at security check-in. One woman has her scissors confiscated. Of course, there was a message on the call-in line last night about not bringing scissors, knitting needles, etc. And why, if you did forget to remove the scissors you just happen to carry around with you, are those scissors HUGE?

8:20am - Orientation leaders explain to all 300 of us that most in the room have attempted to postpone or get excused prior to today and that, while one-on-one interviews are discouraged, they are available, for people facing extreme hardship for having to do jury duty. Half of the occupants of the room leave to go downstairs, speak with interviewers one-on-one to try to get excused.

8:40am - I notice most of those folks have returned to the room, one-by-one.

8:42am - There is a very "traffic school" vibe to this room, but somehow, a few of us seem happy to be here. I mean, why not? Gotta do it at some point, right?

8:55am - I smell first juror steeped in liquor.

9:10am - I learn we can donate our mileage checks to charity (mine will be $1.20).

9:14am - I learn May is the month to aim for jury duty as that's when there is Juror Appreciation Week (which includes games, snacks, and Salsa dancing).

9:18am - I learn we are welcome to grant interviews to media reps downstairs after our trials end.

9:22am - I learn there are fresh baked cookies for sale on 13th floor.

9:23am - I wonder why on Earth most buildings do not have a 13th floor, how the whole "bad luck with 13" superstition got started and why we indulge that superstition by removing row 13 from airplanes, 13th floor from buildings, and even apartment 13 from apartment buildings.

9:30am - We are encouraged to use cell phones in this room, but asked to keep our language polite and volume low.

9:32am - I learn we can say "sidebar" to the judge during selection if we want to answer a personal question privately.

9:35am - I learn that DASH costs a quarter and we can take it to Alvero St.

9:50am - Roxanne, sitting next to me, points out a sleeping man and says, "That's the way to behave on a panel during jury selection. They won't want you if you fall asleep easily." She may be on to something.

10:23am - I am the last juror called in the 2nd group to be considered (the first group was for a 44-day trial, phew!). That means I get to carry the master lists of the potential jurors' names and the time sheet, which I must return to the jury holding people on our first break. Also, if no one collects us in 30 minutes, I must rally and return us all to jury holding. Wow. Is there a runner-up who can take over these duties if I fail to perform?

10:30am - Our group of 50 has two David Henrys. One is sent back to the jury pool, but first, the two David Henrys shake hands. I find that amusing.

10:40am - We're in the audience area of the courtroom, and our judge tells us we may only bring in water, adding, "What you spill today, you may sit in tomorrow." Our judge is a very pleasant man named Michael M. Johnson. He seems to enjoy his job and the process of justice. Makes me eager to start the process itself.

10:42am - I notice the attorneys checking us out, making notes, during the judge's opening remarks. I wonder what they are noting, what they look for and what things they can discern from looks alone, how often they are right, etc.

10:44am - As the judge goes over the charges and asks whether any of us has a relationship with anyone on the witness list, the victim's family, or the defendant, I realize that the defendant is the young woman seated right in front of me. I had no idea that defendants were in the courtroom during jury selection. It's not that I find that odd, I'm just surprised, as it's something I hadn't considered.

11:20am - After the judge has acknowledged the fact that potential jurors, at this point, have had the opportunity to postpone or get excused in writing prior to today, by phone prior to today, and again this morning in one-on-one interviews, he says, "If you're in this room, you're not likely to be excused. Still, if you have a case of extreme hardship, I will hear it now." Finally, the last of 20 potential jurors speaks as to why he should have an excuse on the basis of hardship granted. I find it embarrassing to hear what excuses are given--as if they hope their potential bias should be an excuse, rather than waiting for the attorneys to toss them for exactly that, and then call their jury duty served--and I wonder why people booked holiday travel tickets, non-refundable, for the week after their first day of jury duty. Duh! I mean, c'mon! Have common sense.

11:23am - The judge is nicer than I would be. Four potential jurors are permitted to postpone (are not excused, which is what they wanted) due to the judge's holiday cheer. Of course, had they stuck around, they may have been dismissed anyway and then jury duty would be over. Now they have to come back for mandatory service in December. Pff. Have fun, folks. Of course, as I'm feeling cynical, I realize they'll all just say they have Christmas travel plans and try to get out of it again. I am fascinated that anyone would get to the point where they are physically at the courthouse, having already committed half a day to the process, and then try to get the day not to count. People... odd.

11:30am - I notice the prosecutor has a three-ring binder with the accused's last name in print, followed by "MURDER" written big and bold, facing out toward us--very clever.

11:35am - The judge finishes his instructions and the first 20 potential jurors are interviewed. I remain in the audience.

11:38am - I am shocked at how many of the potential jurors have been victims of crime. No... I'm not shocked--I'm saddened.

11:42am - The scary sleeping man from Roxanne's earlier observation is in that first 20. He, awakened abruptly (I think it's an act), says he's a psychotherapist, as is his ex, who is also now his fiancé. We laugh. Guess the old coot's not so bad after all.

12:17pm - I spend $10 on a bologne-on-white sandwich, chips, bowl of fresh fruit, and a latte. What a racket!

12:20pm - I sit with a woman who is in another jury pool. We chat about family, about non-case-related elements of our experiences, and the fact that jury selection can take longer than a day. She has been in jury selection for two days, with no end in sight. She mentions that she is very scared of being selected, as the defendants in her case are two gang members with tattoos on their foreheads. I am glad our case isn't gang-related. I hadn't even though of that element.

1pm - I call my voicemail to find nine new messages. Keith is concerned about whether I got here, after realizing he dropped me off at the wrong courthouse. I call him to let him know I'm fine, to come up with a pick-up plan, and to see how his day of book drop-offs is going.

1:30pm - The woman I am convinced is the defendant's mom goes into another courtroom. Oops.

1:32pm - Sleeping codger man is late. The judge asks the clerk to go check the bathrooms. I notice a total of four missing potential jurors. Two of them had asked for sidebars due to their crime-victim history. I wonder if they were excused. One of the missing is the woman whose son and husband are in prison. The fourth missing is the old coot, as I already mentioned. I'm realizing I have developed a very definite attitude problem with this guy. Wonder what that's about.

1:35pm - I like our judge. He's nice, has a good sense of humor. I really hope I do get on this jury. I'd like to be a part of this process. It truly is fascinating.

1:38pm - Three of the missing jurors are now back. Only one was excused (the woman who works with the DA's office as a representative for social services).

1:39pm - A new potential juror is put in the DA's office woman's chair. He has had the same car stolen three times. He jokes that he got it back twice, and the third time, "let 'em have the damn thing." We all laugh.

1:41pm - I notice a potential juror smacking gum, despite the sign at the courtroom entrance: "No Gum-Chewing in Court."

1:42pm - I realize I've rolled my eyes about a thousand times today. I am not a very tolerant person.

1:44pm - Potential jurors begin listing their positive and negative interactions with cops. Some people are listing things from many years ago, saying these interactions traumatized them... "Oh, but I can't recall when it was." More eye-rolling from me, I'm sure.

1:45pm - Okay, this is so funny. This woman KNOWS the park where the murder took place. She begins preaching about how awful that park is. After hours of having heard the victim's name, the date the murder took place, the location, etc., suddenly (I suspect when this woman realizes she hasn't been excused for any other reason she has listed that she'd hoped would get her sent out), she breaks down. "Oh! I know that family! I know his father and his sister. Oh, lord, I do know them. I just now recalled the name." Dear GAWD!

1:55pm - We learn that gang affiliation may, in fact, be brought up: Hoover Crips.

2pm - I am now almost certain that the two women (one pregnant) and two small children from the hallway are here with our defendant. The adults take turns coming into the courtroom and observing the selection process. I begin to think, it's just so sad--whether the defendant is guilty or innocent--for members of her entire family to have their lives put in turmoil while this type of case proceeds. The crime took place almost two-and-a-half years ago. I can't wait to look up the case info online when I get home. I recall that we have been instructed not to do such things, if we are selected for jury service. Yeah, right.

2:20pm - It is simply fascinating to hear people attempt to throw out phrases and pieces of information, hoping they'll trigger something that will get them dismissed when nothing else has worked so far. I'm wondering why people ignored the dress code and security issues clearly stated on the phone call-in line. Are people that reluctant to follow directions, or are they insubordinate? Or is it something else altogether? I am really turning this day into a little sociology class.

2:45pm - Potential juror makes a broad statement about the right to live, another makes a statement about gun control. I wonder how much of this talk is evasive action on their part and how much is legitimately something about which they are passionate.

3:45pm - I'm excused. I was called to the jury interview area, met with mildly amused reactions to the way I answered the "occupation" item (I mean, come ON, how could I give just one answer and have that sum up what I do?), and called up for a sidebar so that the judge, attorneys, and court reporter could get details on my history as a victim of a violent crime, why no charges were pressed, how able I would be to remove my experience from the mindset I'd use in serving on a jury in which part of the defense would be that the defendant had been the victim of a similar crime prior to the murder, etc. Of course, the defense attorney wanted me. The attorney representing the people did not, and I was sent on my merry way. Well, not so merry... the day ain't over yet!

4pm - Back into the pool. I'm hoping they don't call me to another panel mainly because, at this hour, no panel would be decided and I would HAVE TO come back tomorrow. A veteran of juries (four times serving, and sat in the jury box from the first round in our selection process, was excused just before I was), to whom I refer as "the Susan Lucci of our case," and I joke about taking a very long pee break so as not to get back into the pool in time for a call. We've been warned that we could be called as late as 5pm (but could be dismissed as early as 4pm).

4:10pm - We're told to fill out mileage donation forms. Everyone gets excited because this means we're on our way out. I notice that the extremely high-maintenance woman who needed every instruction repeated at orientation this morning is getting hands-on help filling out her mileage donation form from the jury pool supervisor. I think she should NOT donate her $2 and buy a class in DUH, if at all possible. I find out she's a government employee. No. Comment.

4:18pm - Final roll call and dismissal. I am one of the last four names called. I feel like the fat kid in elementary school gym class, but I am so relieved to finally be called and sent on my way, I give out a "Woo hoo" and turn in my badge.

4:24pm - I'm at the corner of Temple and Broadway waiting for my baby.

4:33pm - He's here!

And so my civic duty is done, and I'm ineligible for jury duty service until November 22, 2003. God bless America.

Posted by bonnie at 3:25 AM

November 17, 2002

Book It!

The book, she is here! Well, in Los Angeles, any way. Yes, Casting Qs: A Collection of Casting Director Interviews is at the warehouse and our distributor has said we are welcome to come by on Monday to pick up the comp copies we need. Wow! I am so very very very excited.

The battery in my iBook is dead. Did you know these things cost $160+ to replace? Dear me.

Currently riding the crest of a migraine. Not happy. I know it's stress-induced, but man, is it awful! Delightful new friend and actress I manage brought over some pain meds for me, so that I could be productive and also, well, have light or sound around me. I have a wet washcloth draped around my neck, and two good puppy dogs on the sofa, snoring. Keith is upstairs in the bed, not snoring.

We like pet-sitting here. It's very pretty and nice and comfy. Hate kicking it dial-up, but that's just me being spoiled.

I have to call that jury service phone line Sunday night to see if I'm called for jury duty Monday morning. Ick. If I'm in, I hope I get something good. If I'm not in, I have a LOT of work to do. Even if I'm in, I have a lot of work to do, but I won't be able to do it, obviously, as I'll be doing my civic duty.

Sunday is the judges screening for the film festival. We have about five hours of tapes to watch, based on the top scored ones from the lovely screeners' results.

The application is up at 15 Minutes of FEM. I strongly encourage ANY woman with ten minutes or more of stuff to say or do to get over there and fill out that application by December 13th. If being seen by industry professionals and sharing your craft with others is important to you, DO IT. Just amazing stuff, going on there!

Major controversy since the airing of the 20/20 piece last week. This town is filled with angry people, saying the investigative reporting was one-sided and unfair. I can't imagine how a report which contacted everyone on the "other side" of the issue to speak about what was discovered in undercover investigations could be considered one-sided. Honestly, the negative lashing-out that's going on now... I think that's the smell of fear.

Major major major thank you to BrYan for fixing my code issue with the Roxbury Search page. THANK YOU!

Can't believe I actually get to hold my book Monday. Wow wow wow.

That is all.
---
Bon

Brit is Brilliant: "That's what parenting is sometimes. I can't tell you how many times I've had to pull out the 'I mean business' attitude, then stomp off to my room to hide a giggle fit." - Nov. 2002, Somesuch-Whatnot

Posted by bonnie at 12:46 AM

November 12, 2002

Blogity Blog Blog

Gearing up to work three days in the office over at Back Stage West. I like going in every once in a while, to see what the world is like from the office side of things. Three days ought to do it.

Also going to pet-sit for a week. Two cute dogs. It'll be fun. Another little change of pace thing I like to do.

This weekend will be the Judges Screening portion of the ActorsBone ShortsFest. Our screeners have been so rockstar about everything. They've worked hard to get us to the point where we only need judges to screen the Top 20, which should be less painful than screening every single entry, as you can imagine. We're very excited about the film fest. It's really going to happen! And that's something we can all be proud of.

Got a new neighbor here in the Hollywood Hills this weekend. Keith met her. He did the whole, "Here's who we are, where we live, what we do," thing...and she countered with nada. No info whatsoever. What is UP with people? That's the second time that happened to Keith. I asked him to try and get someone's name for me at the casting director panel last week, as I'd forgotten it. He went up, introduced himself and welcomed the gal. Nope. She shook his hand and said thank you. What is your name?! Don't people know this?

Anyway, now Keith wants to bake the chick cookies. Whatever. I'm premenstrual. Those cookies are MINE!

Of course, what I really need to know is: how long before I get a garage spot?

Keith has an audition tomorrow for a commercial or something. He's going straight to callback level, due to having met the casting director at the panel last week. Woo hoo! His play is in the rehearsal process now, and he's very happy with how it's going. He starts the play alone on stage, and has the last line. Very cool.

Please say a little prayer for the mighty TicTac. She is sick. She is 13-years-old and then some, and with all the miles Keith is putting on her, well...she needs some work. Ooh, prosperity, come on down!

Cricket Feet is down, so anyone who's been trying to reach us with Cricket Feet contact information or even trying to access the site for the book (yes, this timing really really really sucks), please be patient and keep on trying.

Here's a tip for you good folks: if you register your domain with Names4Ever and then a year later, when it comes up for renewal, you decide to transfer the registration over to the same company that provides the server space, make sure you remember this: Names4Ever will hold your domain name hostage and demand a high ransom in order to ever let you switch it over!!!!! Outrageous, but true! Effers.

Okay, enough of this. Time to get to the really important part...the quizzes! Woo hoo!

What Office Space character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

* Which Tragic Shakespearean Heroin are You? *
brought to you by Quizilla

*** Which Cocktail Are You?! ***
brought to you by Quizilla

That ought to do it for now. I need to update the bonsite while I'm on dialup this week. Audi!
--
Bon
The Book Is Coming!

Rose Knows: "All in all, people are weird. Thus, literature." - November, 2002, Somesuch-Whatnot

Posted by bonnie at 4:23 PM

November 8, 2002

Fix It

Ah, the pleasures of living in an old building in the Hollywood Hills!

As I type this, I have no Internet access (so, I'll be copying and pasting into the ol' Blogger template at a later time). See...it's raining. Yup. First rain since, oh, July...and it's been constant for 24 hours or so. I LOVE it. LA does not. Old wires do not. I guess that's why we're offline. The phone line is working, though, intermittently, while the Pac Bell dude walks around with his hardhat and tool belt. Eh. It's probably good for me to get some non-computer work done for a minute. Just addressed postcards to 20 of the casting directors in the new book, letting them know I'll be sending a copy over and confirming their addresses, etc.

Now I'll offline Blog and then do some more book work.

Oh, back to the pleasures of this building. I did say pleasures right?

Yesterday, 8am, I am awakened by the sound of rain. In our bathroom. No, it's not raining...the maid upstairs has put something into the drain that has caused a blockage below us...and the whole building's water flow is headed up through our toilet and our tub, filling the room with not-clean water...fast.

Ugh.

I was on such a high from Wednesday's event (details below) that I couldn't get to sleep at a decent hour, so by the 8am flood wakeup, I was really soundly sleeping. So, I spent the morning trying to do phone interviews with three different casting directors while plumbers and landlord types traipsed through the apartment, having to step over Archie, who decided that right in the middle of everything was the best place to flop. Oh, to be a cat!

It was an interesting challenge, but we survived the morning. My poor bladder was so angry by Noon. You do the math. ;)

Okay, so about the Take One Event. Wow. Wow and more wow. Tim and Keith counted 130 people (standing, sitting on the floor, leaning against walls) in attendance. Wow. The panelists were charming and witty and well-spoken. It was just delightful! So nice to meet many of my readers. They were so generous to say thank you to me for putting the thing together, and also to say thank you to me for writing my column each week. That's a really nice confirmation that I'm doing the right thing.

The casting directors were just great. They stayed and answered questions for a half-hour beyond the scheduled time. They chatted with actors who ignored my request that they NOT rush the table and did so with smiles. I did finally have to provide extraction services to the casting directors who were less-likely to say, "Hey, I gotta go. 'Bye." Such a great mix of casting directors: broad experiences, great backgrounds, styles, casting projects, just really good mix. And they didn't mince words. That was really nice.

I hope actors learned a lot from the experience. We'll do another one on Wednesday, December 11th.

There was a moment when I thought to myself, "Hm. There's a lot of this information that I take for granted that actors (should) know. I think, having been inside the offices of these--and 150 other--casting directors, I have a visual picture of what they mean, when they advise actors of their process. Then I realize, that for an actor who has never been inside that office, some of what I assume they know, they haven't a clue about.

Here's what I mean: Actors focus so much on the tiny little things ("Will a casting director care that I only used three staples to attach my resumé� to my headshot, rather than four?" "Is the clasp envelope better than the adhesive-sealed one?" "Does font size matter, on my resumé?") and I think it's because they want to control what ever tiny thing they can, since so much of an actor's journey is outside of her control. Honestly, if these actors could just SEE how these offices work, really, they'd realize that it doesn't matter A BIT what sort of font they use; that no casting director cares about the type of envelope they use (why? Because no casting director has to open the envelopes... ask the assistants and interns which types of envelopes THEY prefer); and staples, glue stick, printing directly on the back of your photo... whatever! None of that is what wins an actor a role.

So, I think that's given me a little clarity on the focus of my second book.

As for the second edition of the first book, I'm already getting excited to do it. I have done so many interviews since the cut-off point for this book, that I really do want to share those articles with a wider audience. I wonder if anyone outside of the entertainment industry finds casting directors as fascinating as I do. I just really think their work is amazing. Their passion and their courage and their entirely behind-the-scenes work goes unrecognized by so many people.

Oh! Here's a mainstream look at some casting director work (though this piece will be about casting director workshops, which are being called "pay-to-play" illegal by the state of California, rather than about the actual work of casting directors): ABC's 20/20 will air an undercover investigation of these workshops tonight. Their website has a really cool article already...I have no idea what to expect from this show's coverage. But the pro-workshop folks have already begun to mobilize; trying to get people to go on record in support of workshops. It's just a really complicated issue.

Technically, casting directors do NOT hire actors. Therefore, the law that's supposedly being broken (potential employers receiving money for job interviews) doesn't technically apply. However, thousands of actors spend millions of dollars (yes, millions) to see these casting directors, associate casting directors, and assistants; hoping this exposure will increase their chances of getting cast.

The sad thing is: the TOP casting directors have NOTHING to do with these workshops. They are far too busy to attend workshops to see actors who, frankly (by majority), are NOT ready to be seen. However, their assistants and associates "advertise" that they have the ability to bring actors into their offices...and when I interview their bosses, I learn that this just ISN'T true.

The people who are really making money off of all of this are the workshop owners. Actors pay $30-$50 a night in order to get in front of casting directors. That's 20 actors at a time (minimum). The casting directors get a $150 honorarium for their time, and the workshop owners keep $450-$850 per night for "expenses." Now, keep in mind that MANY of these workshops have three and four classrooms, in which workshops take place simultaneously...and this stuff goes on five nights a week in most cases. So...doing the math JUST on the MINIMUM end of the scale: we're talking $450,000 per year (conservatively) for the workshop owners. No wonder they are desperate to keep workshops in business!

Listen, before anyone gets upset with me for being anti-workshop, let's make this clear: I did workshops, as an actor, a few years ago. I paid for access to casting directors (and their associates) who I knew I couldn't get in front of via my agent at the time. Did I book work this way? Hard to tell...as this business is all about relationships and some were established during workshops. Who's to say what caused the end result of a job? The issue is, as the labor law is written, workshops where no instruction takes place are in clear violation of the law. But they still operate.

So, I think the ABC show will be a big eye-opener for a lot of people. I look forward to seeing it.

Okay, so enough of that, for now. Bottom line: if you're a workshop supporter and want to stand up and be counted, email Kathryn Joosten. If you want more info on the campaign to shut down workshops, check DoNotPay.org.

On to the quizzes!!

Which Founding Father Are You?

what f***ed version of Hello Kitty are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Oh, so so so much fun! ;)
--
Bon
The Book Is Coming!

"Welcome to the humiliating world of professional writing." - Homer J. Simpson, food critic, to Lisa, his ghost writer

Posted by bonnie at 3:20 PM

November 5, 2002

Rock It

I voted. Keith and I went through the little voter guide book together this morning and then walked down to our little poling place (a school) and did our civic duty. As if a perfect little reminder of what that duty entails, I get a reminder of my jury duty service, which begins on Nov. 18th. I hope, if they don't just say, "Sorry, you work for a major publication conglomerate, you're excused," that I at least get on an interesting trial.

Learned that only 3.9 million people are registered to vote in LA County (population over 9.5 million). Seems low, but I guess it's not that different a ratio from anywhere else in the country. The big issue here is Free Hollywood. I received phone calls yesterday from Dianne Feinstein and Martin Sheen. How did these people get my number?

Attended an amazing showcase for HBO and the Aspen Comedy Festival last night with the Best of the Best of FEM. Just greatness. Faith was amazing, as always, but this time, she was actually flawless. And I do mean that. Just learned that the casting director we'd arranged to scout her got turned away at the door (it was standing room only, which Keith and I did, in the back, with Faith's agent and the event producer, Steve). That's disappointing, but we're going to see what we can do to get HBO to send a tape to the casting director. I'll meet her tomorrow night at the Take One casting director panel I'm moderating (she's not on the panel, but called to ask whether she could come meet me and discuss getting involved on a future panel with me), and I'd love to have a copy of Faith's tape to share with her.

For a Christmas present, of sorts, I designed an official website for Faith: FaithSalie.com. Please do check it out and tell me what you think. She's very happy. I just couldn't believe that anyone with the status of "tradable life form" on some Star Trek fan site didn't have an official site of her own. So, anyway, check there to see when her Dragnet episode airs and when she's doing standup around town. She's up for an Ovation Award for her work with The Laramie Project later this month. So awesome.

Big things seem to be happening for a few actors in my management stable, which is really exciting. I love seeing good things happen for amazing people. Just so very cool! I think I'll leave it at that...for now.

No one is using the Comments function I coded into the Blogs. Hmm... why is that?

The ActorsBone ShortsFest deadline has past, and with very little advertising and promoting, we have been flooded with entries for our first festival. My department (screeners) has been impressively performing and I am just thrilled to have such great people on board for this. Thank you, everyone, for your help. We'll be announcing winners later this month, and the festival itself will be January 11th & 12th in Hollywood.

Oh! Very exciting: Nelson and I are working together on a new cool thing called Hollywood Happy Hour. The website is coming, but basically, it's going to be "news, reviews, interviews, and schmooze with booze" one night a month, starting February 6th. We're bringing in some radio folks, to see if we can shop the demo around, after the first event, and do a live telecast for subsequent events. I'll keep you posted. Nelson and I have been wanting to work together on something like this ever since we met in early 2001. I'm very pleased that we're finally doing something...and something this grand!

Ordered some marketing supplies for the book. It's pretty bizarre that I'll get to hold the dang thing in just a few weeks. What an amazing process this has been! Just about to begin the process of contacting drama schools and college theatre departments about adding the book to their curriculum (and therefore getting into college bookstores). Luckily, my work with Roxbury Publishing educated me on how to do all of that. Also, the shopping cart I designed for their site will be the template I use when I design one for a local bookstore's webpage. I just LOVE how the universe works sometimes! It just always puts me right where I'm supposed to be (even if by the scruff of the neck, at times).

Keith is auditioning for the game show Lingo tonight with our friend Rich. The two of them should be a great pair for that silly spelling show. Heck, just saw a pair win $6500 the other day, so it ain't a bad day's work. Good vibes to the dyslexic beau!! I'll keep you posted on the outcome.

Still no word on when Keith's shows start airing. They "say" we'll have plenty of lead time from the notification they provide about the airdate. We shall see.

Oh: spied in the past week...Reba McEntire (at last night's showcase) and Holland Taylor (during lunch with Nelson). Good spy scores.

Okay, need to get back to Pilates. I miss it. The walk to the polls today was good, though. Every little bit....

Toodles!
--
Bon
The Book Is Coming!

"Yup. Kids are growin' up too fast and it's all because of the Dairy Council." - Dale Gribble, King of the Hill

Posted by bonnie at 12:45 PM

October 31, 2002

Dangit... I'm not done.

David, yes. Go ahead. Share my contact info. I'm always über-friendly to transplants and visitors and such. I have lots of advice about fun stuff to do and such (ironic considering I never leave the house).

Okay, I'm done. Really!!!!!

Posted by bonnie at 11:34 PM

Chip... LOVE the Halloween photos.

Looks like it's same ol' Athens. Very cool.

Hey, is that SJWhatley with SRemel in the angel/elf photos? Dayum. Kids are growin' up. Sniffle.

Please explain to me the kid's costume with the Barbie doll on his collar. What's that?

Nice Alf lapel pin, dude. You done me proud.

Okay... I'm really done. Really.

Posted by bonnie at 11:27 PM

What a day!

And the exclamation point is only there because of grammatical correctness, not because I mean it excitedly.

I want to thank Keith for everything he is and apologize for everything I am.

That sucks.

Moving on...

I attended a really neat comedy show last night at the Comedy Union. It was supposed to be some sort of chick night, but somehow there were more men than women on stage. What the heck is that about? Anyway, cousin Faith was brilliant, as usual. A young lady named Christa was phenomenal. She's already gotten in touch with the 15 Minutes of Fem folk about next round. Good. I'm glad she acted on that suggestion. She's got something pretty amazing. Melissa was excellent too, although very blue. Totally wonderful stuff, though.

I have to check the website to see if it's officially announced yet, but FEM is... oh shoot, it's not officially announced yet. Scratch that. Gotta edit. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH Outrageous! I can't wait.

It's tres cool, some of the stuff that's been happening. When the press release went out about the casting director panel I'm hosting next week, I started getting calls from casting directors who want to be involved in future panels. One of them is the head of casting for Oxygen Network. Well, I realized, when we set up our plans to meet next week, that she would LOVE the FEM thing I can't talk about. So, she's coming to check out Faith! Woo hoo! Love how the universe works!

I've decided I'm going to contribute to the online tributes to Faith by creating her official site for her. She was so flattered when I told her about the plan, but honestly, it's just something I feel I MUST do. I mean, c'mon! She just became a "tradable life form" on the official Star Trek trading life-form site, or whatever. That's huge, right?

I guess I've decided I'm too lame to enjoy the Super Hero Generator thingy. I didn't like any of my choices, nor did I understand them. Damn, I'm literal.

We've designed a color postcard to promote the book (scannable ISBN barcode and everything... so very hi-tech). Oh, its blue lines came and went in the last 24 hours. Dammit, if there weren't changes to make AGAIN. I am very sad that I didn't catch EVERY LITTLE THING as I did the last 20 freekin' edits. Of course, last night, Faith gave me a very glass-half-full way to look at it: "Your OCD isn't so in-control of you anymore." That's probably true. There are pluses to being over 30.

What else? Keith got cast in TWO plays last week. One is a holiday play in which he plays some cool city-slicker Santa who sings. Another is "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest," which, of course, is perfect for him. I'm thrilled that he has so much work under his belt in such a short time in this town. Really amazing.

Y'know that whole "definition of insanity is trying to get different results by doing the same thing over and over again" thing? Well, I've decided that that's the point I've reached with the paper. I keep turning my articles in WAY EARLY and providing more than enough information about the schedule, photo needs, etc., and effin' EVERY week, I get an email from my editor asking where the story is. DUH! IT'S IN YOUR INBOX!! I'm just so "Hoochie Momma!!!" about it. Isn't that what they yelled instead of, "Serenity NOW!" on "Seinfeld." I think that's right.

I wonder what Keith's son is dressing up as tonight. I think he's into some new character I don't know about. Earlier in the year, it was SpongeBob SquarePants, but I think now he's into Johnny somebody. Can't recall who. Last year, he went as Picachu. Adorable.

I miss baseball. Already.

Chip, I loved your Googlism, so I tried it too! Googlism for: bonnie gillespie
bonnie gillespie is excellent
bonnie gillespie is excellent as the john's aggrieved spouse
bonnie gillespie is a regent university
bonnie gillespie is now a regular contributor to backstage west
bonnie gillespie is the plumber's straight

Items one, two, and five are all reviews from the same play: "The Secret Nymph of New Hyde Park," a farce I did in the summer of 2000. Item four is true, and has been since June of 2000. Item three... that ain't me. I never finished my PhD. No regrets.

Chip, how was "Punch-Drunk Love?" I like your DC pics. Are you using PhotoTimeSaviour? Susan looks great! So do you, as always. ;)

David: I SO miss ORT. And Ballard. Gotta miss Ballard. This, that you said, is brilliant: "The fact that Susan and Sean were drinking Pepsi leads me to believe that there was at least one person trying to annoy another. On the positive side, it wasn't in Ottawa." Absolutely ADORE your publishing/editing superhero names. Truly.

Trevor, I'll see what I can do to back-link or whatever. I am SO into your whole "Joe vs. the Volcano" luggage set. I worship that movie. Greatness.

Stephanie W., Tina, I am so into y'all dressing up. LOVE that spirit. Really. Also, I agree on the whole Pilates WITH folks issue. Oh, man, can I tell you how happy I was when Krispy Kreme deemed Southern California worthy of a store. < homer drool>ahhhhhhhh. Krispy Kreme< / homer drool>

Oh, poor Courtney, I am so sorry about the Italian words and the proof! Ack! Having just dealt with my own blue lines, I cannot even IMAGINE facing someone else's and having to hope to catch more the next time through. I was SO happy to just fax the changes (we compromised on FIVE at $15/each, and saved the other few for the second edition) today and SIGN OFF!! Augh! So ready to have it done. I've been sequestered for the past three days. Pet sitting for the five-cat-lady and I chose NOT to take the laptop. Instead, I took the huge box o' goodies for the second book and spent a TON of time doing the initial organization. Still much to do, but getting there!! I realize that the ONLY time I can devote to the second book is the time while the first book is being printed. After it's out, I'm on tour!

Courtney, when you say, "Chicken Pot Pie," over and over again, are you doing it like the character Donnie in "Just Shoot Me?" If not, you MUST become acquainted with this genius character. Just brilliant, and a reason for ME to love saying "Chicken Pot Pie" over and over again.

I love that you're going to town for Chip's b'day. That's so awesome! Absolutely 100% agree on what the best time(s) of the year is/are in Athens. You nailed it. I used the make-your-own-splint thing for my TMJ and teeth-grinding. Didn't break my jaw. Ended up on the floor in the middle of the night a few times. Drat! Hey, use grits for your ants. Seriously. I've seen it work! They eat it and expand and die. They tell each other through their death pheromones and they never come back.

OMG, Big Mike, I almost split my pants laughing over your "I got a ROK." For those of you not in the know, Big Mike is in Korea and that makes that saying/spelling just effin' brilliant! Woo hoo!

I'm sorry I have no advice on the digital camera buying thing. I got mine as a gift from someone who was "upgrading and didn't want to lose money on an eBay sale," so she took the higher write-off from giving it away. I do like it, though. It's an Olympus Camedia thingy. Very nice. D-340-R is the model number. I like it a lot.

A friend from way back (hey, Deb!) said she found it really weird that I "have my whole life" out here on the Internet. I was like, "Huh?" I guess, if you really know me, you know that there is only a FRACTION of my life actually "out there," but if you know me only a little bit, you think, "dear GAWD, how could that woman put so much of herself out there?" I can see that. Still, trust me... this ain't nuthin'!

Oh, for the coolest holiday decorations, check The Wolfesden. It's an actor's board, but dang did Beth make it purdy!

BTW... I know my "Blind Date" episode was really boring, but why the heck could it never be aired, if they could air this evil witch woman's date and this scary "Mercury Man Gets Naked" date I just saw? Ugh. TV.

All righty, I think that be it. Happy Halloweeny, folks! It's soooo spooky! Tee hee!

Posted by bonnie at 6:12 PM

October 21, 2002

Okey Doke, Artichoke (shout out to viv)

It's Bloggin' time!

While the book happily flies through the machine that is Transcontinental Printing, I am enjoying (finally) SLEEP. Yes! For an entire four... or is it five?... days now, I've actually slept 10-11 hours in a row. That's huge! Yay!

Today, Keith came running home from the P.O. Box with this money order.

Yep... The First Sale of Casting Qs: A Collection of Casting Director Interviews. Wow! So awesome! It's just really bizarre that someone I've never met has just sent me money for my words. I could get used to this! Wheeeee!

Management is going great. Definitely gearing up a lot more. Getting requests from people in casting to "send over my people," which I happily do. Today, two of my peeps got called in for an audition based on my submission of their headshots. That's amazingly gratifying for me, as I love to do anything to help others get work (yes, I know, an audition is not "work," in the minds of most, but for me, it's a "yay," just the same).

Keith and I attended the CSA Artios Awards ceremony Thursday night. It was grand! As for celeb-spotting/spying, here's what I can report: Joey Lauren Adams, Catherine Bell, Orlando Jones, Christopher McDonald, Chi McBride, Megan Mullally, and David E. Kelley. Pretty good list. I only saw Tommy Lee at the Best of FEM show Sept. 30th. This was definitely more celeb-intensive. Of course, the people I'm most interested in chattin' wid are the casting directors. Booked for later this week, the Artios Award-winning team that cast Scrubs. I'm excited!

Keith's anniversary of LA Livin' is Wednesday. We went ahead and celebrated yesterday. He baked a cake. It was yummy!

Blog Response Time (I know, I said weekly, but I gots stuffs to say.)

Trevor's Spytop RULES. I really like it. Of course, I looked at the list at first and thought, "Hmm. Am I really that old?" not even noticing that the date was not my birthday and that AGE didn't refer to MY age. Yeah. I'm bright like that. I really like that the Blogs don't open up in new windows. That's way cool for my happy Netscape life.

Courtney: I'm thrilled your TMJ visit proved to you you're not a hypochondriac. Yay! And I love the idea of superheroes with lives/lies to maintain. You ARE a mild-mannered copy editor by day! LOL. I understand the not wanting to turn down work for fear of not being called again... but I also know that I HAVE TO turn down work, at some point, because I just say yes to way too much. You'll know when it's crossed a line. 'Til then, say yes to the work you enjoy! Hey, how was the asparagus pizza? Thank you for your description of Xander. I feel better now. I'm sorry my Blog blinks for you. What browser and OS do you use? Just wonderin'. Oh, and your pumpkins are GORGEOUS. I really like the white one with stars and marbles. You are SO creative!

Stephanie W.: Great new template! I have no Halloween costume ideas either. Keith and I walked down to Hollywood Blvd. last year for the big parade and just general people-watching. It was a huge scene. I'm guessing we'll do that again this year, rather than try to dress up. I should try to remember to take photos this year. Oh, thank you for the David Sedaris recap. Very cool. Oh, and I SO get the Cheese Nip finger/typing thing. LOL.

Shelley: I want to see the slipcover! I'm so proud of you!

Chip: I think it's super cool to hum the theme to Alias while downloading files from your car parked within the wireless cloud. I swear, if that's not James Bond Come to Athens, GA, I don't know what is!

Big Mike: Great idea about a movie setting having nothing to do with the story. I do recommend that you start with a short, though, just because you will have a less monumental task getting funding for your feature if you have a good short to shop around. I hear ya on the self-search turning up weird things online. There are still replies I've made to Ed-Tech Listservs in 1997 coming up on searches of my name! Oh, and thanks for showing me what my Blog looks like in OmniWeb. I'm glad you aren't having trouble seeing the Blog, even if the color change dealy doesn't work.

Trevor: I LOVE that the "order is rearranged with no sense of what is fair or just" with the SpyTop. Just frickin' awesome! Oh, I just quoted you and then read that you think public Blog bloggers should ask permission before quoting or referencing Spies by name. I'm okay with that. Would you prefer I leave you out? I had to go public with the Blog b/c I was just having a really hard time keeping up with everyone in all the various places I kept in touch with people. I'm sorry. Let me know if I need to go back and delete references to you or anything. I'll totally understand. Oh, but I don't understand what you mean about "links given by Blogs deserve a back link." What's that?

The new Munchies Blog template is gorgeous! Ooh!

Jocelyn: What is the "great assignment" you gave to your students. I want to know! I'm glad you love the colors of my Blog. Yay! Worth keeping, right there. ;) Re: learning darts in Athens... you GO, girl! That's where I learned (and I played on a league). It was SO much fun. Dang, I want a dart board. Do they even sell the "real" ones anymore or are they all those silly electronic ones with plastic darts?

Okay, that's it for responses today.

I need to get back to organizing and assembling the second book. This was my project for the currently-at-the-printer book during Memorial Day weekend. I figure this is a good pace for getting a new book out every six months. This assembling process is a whole bunch o' work, though. Hard to filter out the stuff that doesn't need to be there... it all seems so relevant, but dang, who wants a 700 page book?!?

Oh, the panel discussion I was going to moderate on Oct. 23rd has been cancelled (sniffle), but... drumroll... I'll be moderating a panel of casting directors at Take One Bookstore on Wednesday, Nov. 6th, 7:30pm. Woo hoo! I'm very excited. I sent out a little email to a few of my favorite casting directors and the response has been excellent! We're going to have a blast. I'll post the official roster and press release once it's all... well... official.

Toodles!

Posted by bonnie at 6:31 PM

October 16, 2002

Had a really cool dream

Had a really cool dream where my online pregnant friend called in the middle of the night, talked to me about what being knocked up felt like, and then, was in my bed with me, chatting away about how her boobs felt, what her hubby was doing to help out, and when she was expecting (which, of course, made no sense, considering she's preggers now and, in the dream, was due Oct. 24, 2003). Anyway, it was a cool dream and now I'm awake and thinking about her and how it's going. Gonna do the Blog I was gonna do last night (but the weird Blog server thingy was down for my Blog, but not for all Blogs to which I post... weirdness) and then I'm going to email her and see how she's doing today.

Blog and Response

BrYan: I didn't know that "Yoda" was the "Lola" parody by Weird Al. I feel shame. Thanks for the shout-out to my cool new background. I don't know if you're going crazy, but isn't it nice to know--if you are--that my Blog background is not a symptom of that?

Chip: Sorry the color is freaking you out. Maybe because you're sick? I've been sick for two weeks now. Sucks. But... I did finally get some sleep. For the first time since June, I've slept for more than two hours at a time several times over the last few days. I am very happy about that. I am also in a lot of pain. Damn, I miss medication sometimes. Hey, Chip, what's "Clocked" and what does one eat there?

Re: Instant Film Fests, here's the link to the 48 Hour Film Fest, which was recently in LA. Also, here's an article about it from the LA Times, and a link to another of the Instant Fest variety. I am totally in support of you doing such a thing. Let me know if I can help!

Courtney: I did the Buffy character thing too, even though I've never watched the show. Could someone who watches tell me if being this guy makes me cool or makes me really annoying or anything of note?

Which Buffy Character Do You Identify With Most?
brought to you by Quizilla

I love the photos from your trip! Looks like you had a great time. I went to the Jellyfish exhibit in Long Beach last summer and was just mesmerized by the little guys. Stared at them for hours and hours. I want some as pets. They're just really hypnotic.

I'm sorry the background flashes for you. What browser are you using? Is it only on the archive page that includes Keith's son's photo (yes, he is precious)? Did you try changing the preferences in the right-side window? I know you can change font size and stuff. Let me know if this stays a problem... and if anyone else is experiencing such things, please let me know. I'll email you, Courtney. ;)

David: I love your new format, and that I know what "M&P" means. I feel so "insider." You mentioned East-West Bistro and I am so hungry for that. Man... love that place.

Jocelyn: I LOVE your retelling of the night out in Athens. Makes me homesick for experiences I've never had, but ones that are darn-near like ones I've had. I'd bet Athens is like that for a lot of people, though. I don't think my mom ever refused to make my lunch. I had a pretty easy lunch order: carrot sticks, celery sticks, rice cakes with peanut butter, a box of raisins, and money for juice. Man, no wonder I was so hot and skinny when I was a kid. Maybe I need to revisit that menu.

As I'm typing this, I'm realizing that my headaches get worse every time I eat. I'm thinking I must have some pretty big food allergies that I'm not dealing with. It so sucks to not be able to afford to be checked out in a way that would answer questions and fix me up at least a bit. Augh. I'm very frustrated with my lack of health. I'm 32, not 82. Heck, even my neighbor, the yogi, is healthier than I am... and he's 80. Gotta come up with something.

Stephanie W.: How was David Sedaris? I've been meaning to read his stuff. Have some of it on my ever-growing Amazon wish-list... just greatness. Did you have a good time?

Oh, do you know what's really WRONG? That'd be naming a show "The Sunday Night Sex Show" and having it be some lady older and uglier than Dr. Ruth talking to other women as manly as Bea Arthur about sex. Skimmed past it on the Oxygen Channel. Be advised: try and miss it.

Okay, I guess that's the sum of my brain this early morning. Onward! I'm hoping for health and less pain. Wish me luck!

Posted by bonnie at 8:27 AM

October 14, 2002

So, obviously

I really like Blogging now. Don't know if it's the new template, the non-passworded access, or the fact that I am stalling on writing a big huge article right now, but I'm just Blogging my arse off and loving every minute of it.

Trevor: I love that you are now a Featured Spy (which, I guess, is a shout out to Chip, more than Trevor). Also, you should definitely make a short film. Enter it in our Shorts Fest next year. Meanwhile, take pride in the fact that you're creating something really cool that is short enough for even ME to sit through. Love shorts.

I slept for about two hours (natch) and then got up to start working on my article. I've organized my raw interview info and now I just need to get to writing it all up. I am somehow intimidated by the task of making 3000 words into one, long, flowing piece. Don't know why. I've certainly put together many thousands of words more than that into one, long... oh, okay, I guess I need to shoot for "coherent" here too. Nevahmind.

Peace.

Posted by bonnie at 5:00 AM

October 12, 2002

Hiya

I cannot believe it has been SO long since I Blogged. Well, Chip's going to un-password my Blog, which will give me an incentive to keep it up a little more, as I'll use the Blog to keep up with a whole bunch of everybody, not only SpyNotebookers (but I'll always love y'all the most...shh). Hm. Wonder if I need to go through and edit out anything incriminating from the archives. Nah. Anyway, this will now be the main source for news and updates and links of interest, rather than trying to keep all of that in different places on the bonsite.

Boys are so forgetful. I'm not talking about things like dates or silly emotional things that chicks get so caught up on guys remembering. I mean big things. Big, stupid, he-said-he-did-it stuff. Urgh.

I got pissed at the powers that be at the paper this week. They pulled my piece from this week's issue. I'd only put about 30 hours' worth of work into it and it was of the theme of the whole issue, per their request several weeks ago. Bastids. Response: "Yep. That's the price of freelance living. You're not in here pitching for your story to stay in with all the staff writers." Theory: the muckity mucks above are pissed that I own the rights to my work and am going to get rich ("Rich! Rich, I tell you!") from the sale of my book. Keep pushin', punk-ass suckas. I welcome the walking papers!

Ah, don't mind her. She's just venting. ;)

Santa Ana Winds are killin' me! Ugh. My poor allergies. Broke down and took drugs today. I don't care if I wind up addicted to this sinus medication. It's better than the not-breathing option.

Finished the edits on the casting director's book (woo hoo) just five hours before deadline. Pulled all-nighters the ENTIRE weekend. It was rough, but worth it. It's a happy dance-inducing thing, finishing a big project like that. I must say, though, it sure is a hell of a lot more gratifying, editing your OWN work, than editing someone elses.

Let's see... what else to tell?

I've been doing way too much posting over on Wolfesden with this dink who owns a casting director workshop and actor database website thingy. He's sent shills over to pitch on his behalf and stand up for his services. I finally broke it all down for him, since he's clearly not getting it. The board to which he's pitching his wares is filled with cynical, skeptical, seasoned veteran actors who know a turd when they step on one. This guy is definitely one. Anyway, the most recent thing is that he's been publishing a Casting Director Guide that is written by one name (his pseudonym) and edited by his legal name. Smarmy guy. I say run from anyone who has the need to pretend he's more people than he really is in order to make money off people.

The illness that wouldn't die had me sick in bed for a full week, feeling better for two days, and back sick in bed (but editing) all weekend, then dragging hard for the rest of the week. Keith got it and was done with it after five days. Lucky guy.

Today, the 12th, was supposed to be our wedding day. If you're looking for news on how that went, then you missed the announcement of the big postponement decision. Oh, it's nothing dramatic. Keith and I were so overwhelmed by the drama of planning a wedding and all of the chaos involved that we chose to back burner the whole thing and stay blissfully engaged for as long as we can stand it. We'll run off to Vegas and do the hitching thing... or perhaps do the deed at the Beverly Hills Courthouse one Thursday (thanks for the tip, Judy)!

'Til then, you can continue to weigh in on the dress, the ring, etc. over on the bonsite, and I'm sure someone, somewhere, has started a pool for predicted dates. Keith's one-year anniversary in LA is upon us. That's a huge celebration, as he has accomplished SO much in no time, really. Ahh. We're so happy! Being engaged rocks. Really!

It's official. Cricket Feet Publishing's inaugural title Casting Qs: A Collection of Casting Director Interviews is at the printer! Expect it out just in time for Pilot Season, January 2003. You'll be able to buy the book online at CricketFeet.com/CastingQs. Further titles in the works: Casting Director Stuart Stone's new book, Acting Out (due out Spring 2003, edited by me, see above); and my two other titles Self-Management for Actors: Getting Down to (Show) Business (due out Summer 2003) and Casting Calendar: An Actor's Datebook and Action Log (due out for Pilot Season 2004). I'm currently looking at a couple of other manuscripts that have come my way, from folks who have some cool stuff to say.

While the book has been my main focus right now, I'm still collaborating on a few other writing projects. Most recently, I've been asked to contribute to the 10th edition of Judy Kerr's top selling book, Acting is Everything. I'm really excited about that! I'm doing the section on casting directors and on acting in Atlanta. And Keith's headshot will be featured in it, as well as his story on starting acting in his mid-30s. Other writing projects include a series of articles posting to The Actor's Bone. I'm answering questions in the Career Chat area of the BackStage.com site. That's amazingly gratifying. I've also started dispensing advice on ActorPoint.com. Guest lecturing here and there on the business of the business (next up, I'll be moderating a panel on successful women in film at Take One! Bookstore in West LA.

Here's the press release.

Take One Bookstore, 11516 Santa Monica Blvd. (five blocks west of the 405) 310.445.4050 Wednesday, October 23, 7:30pm, FREE OF CHARGE.

Back Stage West Casting Columnist Bonnie Gillespie will moderate a panel discussion featuring documentary filmmaker Mollie Gregory, author of Women Who Run the Show: How a Brilliant and Creative New Generation of Women Stormed Hollywood and several special guest panelists (women profiled in Gregory's book, other women who have made their mark in film).

Review of her book from Publishers Weekly:

Documentary film producer and director Gregory interviews over 100 powerful women who've made their mark in film in this hefty book. She organizes it by decade; thus, the 1970s chapter is called "Beachhead," the '80s is "Securing the Perimeter" and the '90s is "Breakthrough." She investigates the barriers women like The Sting producer Julia Phillips came up against and lauds the accomplishments of Mimi Leder, who directed The Peacemaker. Dense and very thorough, Gregory's work will be important to those in the fields of film studies and women's studies. Photos.

Getting started back up with the management company, slowly but surely. For those of you just tuning in, when I started managing Keith's acting career earlier this year, I had no idea things would take off so quickly for him. I decided I must know what I'm doing, so we decided to start up a little management company. On July 1st, we launched Cricket Feet Management. Keith's been working on two series (one for the Discovery Channel, one for the Learning Channel--check back for when they will air), as well as indie films, student films, commercials, plays, staged readings, and two Spanish-language videos. Amazing!

Have a short film burning a hole in your pocket? Enter it in the ActorsBone ShortsFest (inaugural fest, January 2003). If you're interested in being a screener for the shorts, shoot me an email. I'm the co-founder in charge of that element. We'd love to have your help! The deadline is fast approaching (November 1st), and I am so happy to have such an amazing team of professionals in the industry helping out with this entire process. Wow!

Radio show Back Stage Live kicked off in September on KRLA 870am. I've been the in-studio guest a couple of times. Download the evil listening tool, then go here to listen, and then call 1.866.870.KRLA between 6pm and 7pm Saturdays with your questions about acting and casting. Woo hoo!

A quick response to some Blogs before I sign off (oh, and you'll notice I'm not responding to some of the more intimate issues in SpyNotebook-er's Blogs, now that this puppy's going public.

Chip: Thank you SO MUCH for killing the evil letters. Now I KNOW I love you. I love the idea of an anthropological study based on the contents of a school's Lost & Found. Maybe someone has done this? Don't worry that you missed me on the air last week. I'm on again today (see above). Ironic that I had my return to the air for the first time in five years on the same day as the WUOG 30th anniversary. Greatness. Did you listen to the alumni DJs? Any good? Is long red-haired Blake the guy from punk band Balrog? We studied acting together at UGA in the early '90s. Tell him I said hi.

Trevor: Interesting dialogue on copyright issues. I'm sure, if I had the energy, I could come up with actual percentages, but let's just look at the professional writing I'm doing these days, as opposed to the gazillion pages of academic writing, personal creative writing, and other expressions of creativity and angst I've penned or otherwise let escape from me somehow. As for the stuff I get paid to write, the % that is owned by me is 100. That was by design. I get low pay to write freelance, but I do retain my rights. So, it was a trade off, and based on how the book sales go, I'll get an idea of how great that trade off was. The money I get for my column each week is minute, and considering the paper is $3 and goes out to 30,000+ weekly, I ain't getting much of a cut. No royalties, but no reprint without renegotiating the contract either. % of the pieces I've written sold? All of 'em. In fact, even if I broaden the scope to include other works (photography, art, acting, creative writing), I've scored a very unusually high ratio of sold works, compared to most creatives. I absolutely understand how incredibly lucky that makes me! I think, as to your last question, that the work is the same for me, whether I'm paid to do it or not. Obviously, a deadline and someone else's money changes the vibe attached to getting a piece done, but I think the creative joy is the same. At least I hope it is. I think I would stop writing for money if I didn't enjoy it.

Courtney: Big ew on the blood spatters thing. I have so much more I want to say to you about other stuff, but want to respect your privacy on this now-public Blog. Wanna email me?

David: Your string of Braves game, Chick-fil-A, and Steak-n-Shake posts just got me SO homesick. Dang. See the post to Trevor above about item five in the copyright discussion. I don't know that you would feel more creative if paid to write. I think the bliss of it comes from the doing it and the pay is just a huge, unexpected bonus. At least that's the way I see it. Perhaps because I know it could all as easily dry up as it has flooded in. That's the former actor in me, I'm sure. We're always prepared for the downtime between paying gigs. And we still go do free theatre and stuff for the love of it.

Stephanie W.: I am so impressed with your boot camp thing. Wow. Y'know, I don't think I'd ever get anything done if I had Trillian. It's probably for the best that I'm not even going to explore whatever that is. Oh, in software news, Keith used something called Hijack (or somesuch) to record my radio show off the Internet last week. He then used iMovie to edit it down and will burn it to a CD when we have enough tracks to make that worth doing. Then (total side note here) we'll shop that baby around for some other interesting opportunities. Woo hoo!

Tina: Thank you so much for looking for pix of Hello Kitty slippers for me. I'm bummed you didn't find them, but I think I can gather a pretty good idea of what they look like, from your description. I have Power Puff Girls socks. Is that close? ;)

Jocelyn posted! Yay! I must be rewarded for my optimism of checking the "tardy" Blogs by getting to see your story about the blind date and the guy winning bible trivia at church camp. Reminds me of something that happened to my friend Deb when she was living (and dating) in Athens. She was set up with this guy who turned out to be a real bible thumper (which was so not her thing). He had on purple socks and Deb mentioned that. He said, "I wear purple in honor of our King." Deb asked, "Elvis' favorite color was purple?" Of course, all I could think of was Donny Osmond (shows the generation gap) and his saying, "Cute Marie. Real cute."

I am SO obsessed by these online quizzes, I finally made a page just for sharing the experience! More new quizzes just added... again (oh, it's so dangerous)!

Some Interesting Name Statistics for Bonnie Gillespie:

* The Girl's Name Bonnie is shared by ~314,000 people in the USA.
* The Last Name Gillespie is shared by ~41,300 people in the USA.
* The First Name, Last Name Bonnie Gillespie is shared by ~50 people in the USA (there's me, a stripper in Hotlanta, a gym teacher in the midwest, and some really well-published academic).
* The First Name, Last Initial Bonnie G is shared by ~11,270 people in the USA.
* The First Initial, Last Name B Gillespie is shared by ~1,900 people in the USA.
* The First Name Athene is not common in the US and if it exists, the shared population is less than 1,000 (damn straight).

Terribly cool, is this product name random description generator. Here's what it came up with for me.
bonnie is a screwdriver! It waters your plants! (Which is ironic, since I kill plants.)
keith is like a normal key-ring, but it can be used on the move.
cricket feet is a billboard! It weighs anything you put on top of it!
casting qs is a small plastic pyramid that's made of solid gold! It is also available in white and detects harmful gases. (Me likee that.)

Had to do the cats.
archie is a new type of vegetable that looks bigger than it really is! (So true!)
salema is like a normal suitcase, but it sticks to the skin. (Hee hee.)

And a reintroduction, of sorts. Ah, yes... the greatness of Babelfish. Shoulda figured! Thanks, Panj.

or (english to portugese and back to english)

Ampere-hour, yes... greatness of Babelfish. Shoulda appeared! Gratefulness, Panj

Okay, that's gonna have to be it for tonight. Back to work I must go. Or sleep. Not sure yet. Decisions, decisions. XXOO all!
--
Bon
"Welcome to the humiliating world of professional writing." - Homer J. Simpson, food critic, to Lisa, his ghost writer

Posted by bonnie at 6:56 AM

September 26, 2002

There's Got To Be a Way To Make Money off of This

As readers of the late, great DeadLaszlo.com may recall, I live on the street that leads to the Hollywood sign. Every day, tourists stop right in front of my front door, hop out of their cars, and snap photos of the sign from the street. Ours really is the best view of the sign, and I giggle every time I see people excitedly glimpsing the sign I live beneath.

Keith and I were driving down the Sunset Strip recently and he spied one of those Star Maps salesmen on the side of the road. These kids set up little stations every few hundred feet or so along the strip and sell photocopied maps of the area, with certain celebrities' homes highlighted. They sell these maps for $5 apiece. I figure that's a HUGE mark-up over the cost of copies and the highlighter they use. As for research on whether these homes really are the stars' they purport to be... I have my doubts on whether that aspect even really matters all that much.

Keith asks me how on earth these folks make any kind of money. Puh-lease! That's simple! Tourists will pay for anything like that! So, that brings me back to our little place in front of the Hollywood sign. How could we make money off of the tourists who stop on our street every day? Easy... let's sell maps to the sign itself. If we set up a little stand right in front of our door, I KNOW that at least one tourist a day would stop and shell out the bucks for a map that leads all the way up to the sign itself.

But, much more interesting--to me, anyway--is the idea of a cool little web-based financial venture. Considering the fact that most tourists find out about our street (not the most main of drags) by doing an online search of "best view of Hollywood sign," I figure it's only poetic justice to make a buck off the web for all of the traffic it sends our way.

Here's what I propose: each time a tourist stops in front of my door, I want a camera set up to take a photograph of that tourist and his car. This would be like a side-angle view of the photographer as subject. Okay, next, I would put these photos up on a website. The coolest underground thing would be to find yourself on that site. We'd do a "search by date," "search by car," and "search by goofy tourist outfit" version. Finding yourself on the site would be like a Where's Waldo for Hollywood looky-loos. Can't you see the potential for greatness here?

But is there potential for cash? Can't see it yet... so perhaps this brilliant concept will be back-burnered for a while.

Posted by bonnie at 1:36 PM

September 20, 2002

Blogging While Watching Family Ties...

Today was the day that summer officially ended in the Gillespie-Johnson Household. Here's how we decided that. When it got too hot to move (which Siouxsie Sioux said was over 92 Degrees), we moved the big TV and the DirecTV receiver into the bedroom and ran a network cable from the big blue box so that we would work and live in the only room with a window AC unit. Well, tonight, when Keith needed to go to sleep (and, since I don't sleep at night, we've been compromising by me working with one little light on and him trying to sleep through it... some compromise!) we decided to call summer officially over and put the house back the way it was meant to be. I swear, coming back to my little living room setup was such a delight. I had organized the living room prior to doing the BIG work on my book so that I would write the dang thing from the POWER source of the room (according to the Feng Shui octagon). I am happily back in a nice little comfort zone. I've never been a big fan of TV or work in the bedroom. Turns out that's a fundamental principle to Feng Shui! Who knew?!?

I've just pulled up a bowl of carrot and celery sticks, a little ranch dip, and some ice water... ah, such a good midnight snack. Yeah, I'll probably have Oreos after this. Tee hee.

Okay, so, here's what's up in my world: scanned a whole bunch of pictures of Keith's son, Quinn. Here's the most precious.

He'll be four in December and should be allowed to come visit us next summer. Hopefully, we'll be in a house by then. Man, some things are going to have to move quickly in order to see that happen. Fingers crossed!

The book is in galley copy form now. The FINISHED cover is up at my designer's site and I'm just thrilled! It's really gorgeous. We met with the author of the book to which I'll be contributing earlier this week. She's a delight and a great source of information. Keith will meet with her distributor tomorrow to see if he wants to distribute our book. Meanwhile, I'm trying not to strangle the author of the book I'm editing and most likely publishing. I say most likely because the money behind this guy keeps changing its mind. Whatever. I'll start editing (resume, really, since I already began) when I get a check.

Anyway, ten galley copies will go out this weekend for advance reviews and such. Still waiting on our Library of Congress number. Very exciting (to me, anyway)!

Keith's TV show on The Learning Channel wrapped. The wrap party is October 4th, and that's when they'll give out the episode schedule for the airdates. I'll keep you posted so that you can get a load of my fiancé playing a Texas cop. With an accent. And a moustache. Should be a real hoot! Keith's play opens tomorrow night--and this one he's actually going to let me see! So, I gotta figure out what to wear tomorrow. I have like one outfit. Grr.

I have five active complaints registered with the Better Business Bureau right now. Effin' Equifax! They've so screwed with my credit rating and they acted illegally to do so. I have proof, so it should be a pretty "easy" win, but dear GAWD, how do you begin to challenge the powers that hold the keys to your credit rating?!? I'm being vewy careful, to say the least. Mercury is in Retrograde for another two weeks, so I'm double and triple checking everything!

Now on to the Blogs!

Trevor: We had Earthlink issues when we switched from dial-up to DSL. Not to discourage you while working on it, but it took months to straighten out the mess. Of course, we did end up with something like five free months of service for the trouble. Woo hoo!

Bryan: What is Amazon's Gold Box thingy? I saw it up there the last time I shopped, but was afraid to click on it, after reading your post. Is it scary?

Chip: There's more than ONE Avril song? Hmm. Think I'll have to go take that quiz. Yes you DO know what those letters mean and where they are! Quit teasing me!! You stop that!!

Courtney: Sounds like you're working with a good author. I totally agree that grad school is a magnet for the crazies. That's where I met Psycho Boy (the one and only character in my life to ever have a restraining order placed on him by me). Actually, I met him at the Engine Room... so, nevermind.

The Boy Spoke Ton thing is on the FIRST page I go to, but the page I'm talking about with the frickin' letters is the one with all our names on the list (with Trevor now on top). I think I'm about to give up and just say it's Esperanto for "Chip loves Alf" or something. *sigh*

You don't see the Dave Foley attraction thing? I guess it's the "funny smart guy" thing. Not sure. Maybe it's b/c he's Canadian. Hmm.

I hope Hank is 100% now! Have fun on your trip!

David: Thank you for giving me the origin of "feh," at least for you. I think it's kind of like "eh," but with more disdain. Perhaps? When did I last see you socially? Um... have we met? At the Academy, maybe? And why were you going to address the Blogs, "especially Bonnie's?" I'm so intrigued! You liked The Rock baby doll photo, right? ;)

Jane: You must be REALLY busy with your boyf!

Shelley: Yay! Yay! Shelley! Yay! I love the idea for a new Blog to go with your new house. That's awesome! I wish I could make a slipcover myself. I bought one from Surefit.com and let me just say... "sure don't!" Bleh. I finally took it off and stuffed it under the sofa. The kitties sleep in it now.

Make sure you take a look at California's renter laws. They are VERY pro-renter. I think you should have NO problem getting your money back, once the landlord knows you're not just going to shrug and roll over. Also, according to California law, you are entitled to the interest the landlord collected on your deposit for the ENTIRE time you rented! Make sure you get that too, if they're going to be a pain! Let me know if you need me to look up links for you.

Kahuna Roll sounds delish!! Yum!

Oh, here's the punchline on Keith's bike wreck from March: we got the settlement check today. Nothing major. It was for $9500. So much less than we'd been told to expect, by attorneys... but also enough for us not to bother pushing the issue by getting a lawyer at this point. I'm sure the insurance company KNOWS that, and that's why this was the dollar amount offered (actually, the offer was for $1000 less, but Keith got them to bump it up). His hospital and medical expenses were $6200, so that's a nice $3300 for pain and suffering. Considering he lost work, had to ride the bus, had to fix up his bike, and basically be in pain for a month and a half, I guess that's about right. *shrug* Who knows?!? Anyway, wanted to let you know, since you were SO awesome in helping us start the whole process, back in March!

Stephanie H.: School is good! Talk to us about school! That lets me live vicariously. I would ALWAYS be in school if I could afford it.

Stephanie W.: I guess new Buffy=back to Blogging, eh? And not just for you, it seems. Too bad I've never seen the show, or I'd have more to talk about.

Tina: Hello Kitty SLIPPERS?!? You must post a photo of them! My friend Faith (who Chip will recall as the chick who starred on two episodes of Star Trek: Voyager, has the Hello Kitty boombox and she loves it! I only have little kitschy Hello Kitty things. No major appliances.

Now... has anyone noticed that Sweet Little Sara is busy posting away down under the "Used to Write" heading? That makes me SO sad! Chip... you bump her up, right now! She even knows the theme song to Felicity. You MUST reward that!

Results of recent quizzes:

Which Rejected Character Are You?



Which Avril Lavigne Song Are You?


Ooh. Charles in Charge is on! G'nite, Bloggers! XXOO
--
Bon

Back at Somesuch-Whatnot: "Ewwwwwww... I'm out on that, but I'd trade my roommate for a pig and a John Deere tire." - Jamie, 24 May 2002

Posted by bonnie at 2:08 AM

September 11, 2002

Time to Blog!

Hi Gang!

The big news here is that Judy Kerr, author of "Acting is Everything," has asked that I contribute to the new 10th edition of her book. Woo hoo!

I've been pet-sitting, but I'm back home now... thank goodness! Animals were great, though. Still... better to be home.

Trevor: Nice job jockeying for position. Color me impressed! Let's go by middle name (Athene) or height (5'7"). I like my odds either way.

Can YOU tell me what TQZOPUFCPPL means? I'm convinced Chip has decided to torment me by not answering. Do you know? Will you tell?

I agree that we need to instill nerd culture very early. Our kids will be at a disadvantage otherwise. Oh, and I'm TOTALLY stealing your quote for my sig file: "The next thing you know, they're wearing tin foil hats and teaching their tadpoles the French national anthem in Esperanto." Just effin' genius!

Congrats on the new house. No TiVo? I can't imagine going back. I don't have it yet, so it's not like I know (other than in theory) what it is that I'm missing. That would make me sad.

Big Mike: I now have iPod envy. I didn't before, but I sure do now. Sounds GREAT.

Is Eric Bravo coming back to Hollywood? I like Eddie Blaze-o for a comic book character too. Officer Blades... is she built like Edward Scissorhands? Can she frisk perps?

Hmm... OmniWeb, eh? I'm loving Netscape 7.0 on my Mac. I may have to check out OminWeb, but for now I'm pretty pleased (except with its ability to import... which is NO ability... address book and email files from Outlook or anything other than an old Netscape or a text-only format). So, I'm now making a deal with several devils, using Outlook Express and Netscape 7.0. Thinking of going to Microsoft Entourage for mail. We'll see.

Is it true that version 6 of anything sucks?

Chip: No more Gini Eldridge's dad in the government?

Windows security update sounds about right.

McDougald family AND Tetris... are you TRYING to make me jealous?

Don't use Front Page. Tell the dink who's using it to stop. Then flick him.

Jane's link doesn't stay blue in Netscape, only in IE. WHAT DO THE LETTERS MEAN, CHIP?

Time for a new "Written Since" date thingy. Yes?

Courtney: I'm sorry your cat is sick. One of the animals we've been babysitting this past week is old and sick. Reminded me of Muffy (my cat who lived to be 18). Uncle Bill (this cat we babysat) gets subcutaneous fluids every other day. It's hard when animals are sick. I hope your baby is okay.

I can see an affair with Dave from NewsRadio. Yum. I love watching that show on A&E. So good.

The jellies you bought sound yummy! I wish I had a sense of adventure for foods like that.

I wish I had the fundage to steal some ideas from Trading Spaces for my bedroom. We need a new space before we try to decorate though. Next place. Where ever and when ever that may be... it shall be good. Hoping for Santa Monica and an actual HOUSE. We'll see.

Yay for being off caffeine! How'd you do it? I take Excedrin which has caffeine in it, and then there's chocolate and such. I never drink soda or coffee, so that part is easy, but there's other caffeine I guess I can really avoid. Any tips would be appreciated.

Your brother's football writing was GREAT. Damn Good Dawg! Flagpole should snap it up, easy! If they don't, maybe the Red and Black? Good stuff, there!

Thank you SO much for the editing rate info. It was VERY helpful. I set a rate and gave a quote to the casting director who wants us to publish his book. He's probably going to hire me to edit it, even if he self-publishes (which, at this point, I'm kind of hoping he will... he's already driving me nuts and we haven't even made a deal yet). I'll keep you posted. But, BIG thanks for the info!

David: Yep, the "too busy to hate" slogan is from way back. Kickin' it old school with that one.

I guess no programming is as cool or as free as WUOG. They're having their 30th reunion next month. I won't be able to return for it, but man that sounds like fun. Guest DJ shifts and all sorts of nostalgia. I can't believe my first airshift there was 14 years ago! Wow. Midnight to 4am Sundays. I walked over from my dorm room in Reed Hall with mace and a lit cigarette (to burn the guy who attacked me... so I could ID him easier later) and a stack of albums. Ah... the good ol' days.

Hey, what's "feh" from? I've seen it used in a few posts and emails. I get the meaning, but where is it from? When I used "dur" for a while, everyone knew I'd just read "Bridget Jones' Diary," so I'm wondering if "feh" came about from some Brit read or something.

I liked your Little Shop reference with regard to your dentist visit. I was listening to the soundtrack just the other day. Greatness. Oh, and my dentist sent me porn in the mail, so I'm not going back to him.

Dera: Yay! You're back! We missed you!

You should've bought Hello Kitty-related action figures in New York! I hear Sanrio items are quite hard to come by on the east coast. Here, they're everywhere. Love me some Hello Kitty goodies!

I'm glad you're carpooling with Chip. Definitely sounds like a good way to save money and improve your Academy-related mental health.

Happy belated birthday! I ALWAYS order something I really want from a catalog or online store and make sure that it'll be delivered on (or as close to as possible) my birthday. That way, when I arrive home from wherever, I ALWAYS have a box waiting for me at my door. Makes me feel so happy! Amazon works. eBay is less likely to time out as well. Body Shop is also a good one for me. Gap too. All great. Try that next year. I ALWAYS do it!

Tina: My mom made the Kraft Marshmallow Fluff fudge too. It was GREATNESS. She loved pecans, so she would always add pecans to ONE PART of the fudge (for her) and leave the rest plain and smooth for me. Guaranteed holiday weight gain... and I didn't mind one bit! I liked to freeze a beer mug and then fill it with milk, and the icy milk would be the perfect mate for still-warm fudge. YUM. I miss my mom.

Apple crisp! Yes! Peach cobbler! Yes! Very very very good list!!!!!!!!

Oh, y'all should've bid on the Land Speeder. It's parked (or was, before it sold, anyway) right up the street from us on the Cahuenga Pass. They have a film car lot and it has that one plus a couple from Tron and Star Trek too. It's way cool to drive past. Not at all touristy. Just some little used car looking lot, gated and dirty, with these amazing film cars in the back of the lot (you can see them from the street). Anyway, I'm guessing yours wasn't the winning bid for that?

Okay, that's it for responses to the Blogs. Life is generally good here. I spent two days working in the office of the paper, where I had a freak psycho guy call in and yell at me and the girl who was assisting me. She started crying. I just laughed at the guy. He was SO mentally unstable. He told me that he's worked with drug dealers who are more professional than I am. This is because I told him not to use such language with me when he told me that I should suck his cock so I'd know what it felt like to have something where my brain should be. I said, "Goodness gracious!" and he said, "Oh, fuck you, you whore! You Charlie Brown loving cunt!" I just had to correct him. "No, sir. That's Good GRIEF Charlie Brown, not goodness gracious. I'm afraid you're mistaken." That's when he lost it. All this over having called him to get a little more information (items he had left blank on his casting form). He said that he shouldn't have to give more info... that it was our fault for having a web-form that actually can go through without complete information.

Whatever. It was a fun little drama and a nice big reminder of why I do not like office work. I so prefer working from home.

Which reminds me... I need to get back to work!

Bye, y'all!
--
Bon

"Hey... ignorance is blistered." [Katy, on The Psycho Ward, 13 April 2001]

Posted by bonnie at 3:19 PM

August 31, 2002

Insert Title Here

Hello Bloggers,

Happy Labor Day weekend! Woo hoo! I just got up from a nap. I love naps. Ahhh.

Clemson and UGA are playing football on my TV. Clemson just pulled ahead in the 3rd quarter. Is the game at GA? I haven't noticed. Oh... big G on the field. Home game. Okay. Sorry, Athenians. I always hated home games.

I've given my kitties happy catnip. They are very content. As it should be.

We've been house/pet-sitting for the five cat lady in Culver City. Next week, it's a couple of dogs in the nicer part of the Hollywood Hills. I go in on Tuesday for orientation and keys. $35/day. Not bad, considering how much I love animals anyway. It's one of many things I'd probably do for free, really.

Keith's Saturn commercial has started airing. It starts out with a guy leaving his garage on foot, running backwards into the street, and then going forward as if he is a car. Then, as the commercial shows everyone doing that little jog-run thing without cars, Keith is in the city streets where everyone is stopped and then again he's in the night-time shot, holding flashlights and headed toward the camera. It's pretty cool.

Alphabetical Blog Response Time:

Amy: Oh, man, I wish I had PT for migraines. I had an evil migraine last night for the first time in a while and it was just really atrocious. I ended up feeling like I'd been hit by a truck all day today, as I recovered from the hell of last night. HATE migraines. Ugh. Just glad I have them less frequently now than I did in my 20s.

Big Mike: I totally understand and agree about milk being the least of the evils in an unhealthy lifestyle. See... since it's easy for me to be without milk, I like to be all holier-than-thou about it. I am not at all a candidate for a healthy lifestyle, though I have been in the past. I'm at a pretty big low on the self-care meter, these days.

BJ: Oooh, can I have Netscape 7 for my Mac? Should I get it? Is it free? Oooh... is its Composer life better? That's mostly what I use Netscape for and I did NOT upgrade to Netscape 6 because its Composer life SUCKS compared to Netscape 5's. Sorry about the cat poop on the couch. I don't know why animals do that stuff. We were just saying how lucky we are that our cats were trained so well so young (after having stayed with five cats... two of which like to pee on things). Of course, those were "rescue" cats, so I don't begrudge them any odd behavior. Still... that sucks, that you had everything in place, kitty-care-wise, and still got the poop treatment. Once, my then-16-year-old cat Muffy took a crap on top of my Master's Thesis, which I had printed out and stacked neatly on the floor. I told him, at that point, I agreed with his review of the material. ;)

Chip: WHAT DO THE LETTERS TQZOPUFCPPL MEAN?!? They are at the top of the page that lists the bloggers and I MUST know. It's killing me! DragonCon will make Keith jealous. Did you have fun? I watched part of the Must See TV Special too. It was cute. Oooh, I miss Gyro Wrap. Go have a BBQ Chicken Wrap for me and dip your fries in feta dressing. Please? Yes, those 2003 kids would've been my 7th graders. I liked them... but not nearly as much as my 6th graders (class of 2004). Tell them I said hi, if you feel like it.

Courtney: Bless your heart, dealing with the CA DMV. Boy, don't I know what a pain in the ass that is! Hey! I'll be doing freelance work all three-day weekend too! Yay us! Uh-oh... you said, "My next husband." That can't be good. Everything okay? I'm thrilled your TMJ PT includes massage. Man I need one of those! Thank you for sharing the details of your treatment. I really do appreciate it. Oh my God, I think you are TOTALLY right about the anti-anxiety drug timing and the rise of Starbucks. I wonder if they own stock in one another's companies. That's brilliant, Courtney! Do you still need advice on defragging? There is a way to set up your computer to do it on its own every week (or whatever timeline you put it on). I think, if I remember my PC correctly, you go to Start, then Tools or wherever the System Tools Live, and when you select the defrag option, you have the opportunity to set it up on a regular schedule. Be prepared for its first run to take a big chunk of time, if it's been awhile. Hey, I totally get the need to copy and paste blogs to respond to them. I do that too! Necessity! Thanks for clarifying the Joe + Dad + Cigar dynamic. I like it better, now. Ooh, I guess the Discovery Channel would be a good thing to watch during exercise. Oh, my Pilates purchase from Amazon is a DVD, not a book. Of course, it might as well be a piece of art, considering I haven't played the dang thing yet. Grr. I'm so impatient with myself right now! Thank you SO much for the rates on editing. One more question: for those who do choose to charge a flat fee, what would that be, generally? Thanks again. I told the guy that we WILL publish his book, so now I just need to give him an idea of what the editing will cost and decide if I want to take a bigger cut of the book sales or get paid up front. I'll let you know what I decide. Oh! The letters I keep asking Chip about are in the Title Bar of my web browser, not on the page itself (like all the way at the top of the computer screen... does that make sense?). I do have the blue notebook and the list of bloggers. The letters, though, are in the title bar and I'm just dying to know what they mean! I guess I'm not surprised that you would say I live the lives of a dozen people. That's probably true. I get really down on myself when I under-function (in my opinion) and people have to remind me that even when I slack off significantly, I'm still doing more than three people at once would be doing. It's hard for me to get that through my head, though. I like doing all the different things at once, though. My greatest joy is the writing, and luckily I get paid to do that (something I never imagined would happen). Now I just need to get paid more to do it (or at least get paid for more of it that I do for free right now). Thank you SO much for saying that a hummingbird was telling you to say hello to me. That TOTALLY made my day. It's the little things, really, and I've been missing Mom a lot lately. Thank you, Courtney. Really. Oh, I've never heard of plutes. I did just see mache (lettuce) on Oprah though and I really want to try some of that. Know anything about it?

David: Your task with WRFC sounds like the GA baseball game broadcast crap we had to do over at WUOG when I was there. Of course, we didn't switch anything over to an automated jock after the game, but the sitting there during it process sucked! Ugh. Do you like football, at least?

Shelley: Wanted to tell you about Keith's bike wreck settlement offer. Okay... so, Keith gets hit by a truck (deluxe Cadillac SUV, actually) while riding his bike in the bike lane and following all the laws, etc. The guy doesn't signal nor merge into the bike lane before making a right across the lane (and on top of Keith) to turn into a parking lot. The attorney you got us in touch with (via the San Fran legal folk) tells Keith that this is such an open-and-shut case that he should write a demand letter on his own and keep all the money for himself (surely, $10k over his hospital bills, ambulance fees, and lost wages from his job at Yahoo!), but that he'd be happy to represent him if he WANTED to share the money. We did the letters (using NoLo's "Writing a Winning Demand Letter" guidebook) and... get this... the offer comes back: $8500. Period. That's $8500 to cover $6500 in hospitalization, ambulance, and medical bills and... oh, here's $2k for your lost wages, pain and suffering, getting your bike repaired, etc. WHATEVER!! So, Keith thanked the guy from the insurance company, after making absolutely sure that he understood that the $8500 wasn't the offer on top of paid medical bills, and now we'll go back to that attorney and start again. Pff. Seems so stupid, since now we'll sue for triple the bills (1/3 for paying the bills, 1/3 for Keith, and 1/3 for the attorney)... when they could've just settled for even as little as $15k inclusive. Anyway, just wanted to give you the scoop on that. Obviously, LA is NOT a bike-friendly place. I'll keep you posted on the continuing saga.

Tina: I love your list of foods with which to have milk. I agree with them all. Would you add pecan pie and fudge to that list or is that just me?

Okay, gang... that's gonna have to do it for today. Must get back to work and earn some money, holiday or no holiday. Keith has an overnight shoot for a film tonight. He's going to be shot between the eyes. It'll be great tape. Yes, I'm sufficiently worried and made sure he took precautions with the safety and stunt folks in the planning stages of the shoot last week. Ooh, time for Big Brother 3... just as UGA pulls ahead late in the 4th. Very good!

Happy September, everyone. XXOO
--
Bon

"Welcome to the humiliating world of professional writing." - Homer J. Simpson, food critic, to Lisa, his ghost writer

Posted by bonnie at 8:00 PM

August 22, 2002

Rubber Necking

Okay. I'll admit it. I have watched The Anna Nicole Show.

I actually was quite looking forward to its premiere. How could I not have known about the show? With the full-on media blitz that was the advertising campaign for what the E! Entertainment Television networked hoped would be their "The Osbornes," there was no way to not know this show was starting up.

I tuned in on that first Sunday night, champagne at my side (I knew, just from the promos, that there there would be no way to enjoy this show without some sort of libation of my own), half-hoping that Anna Nicole would crush her poor little dog in an early-on-in-the-episode stumble/tumble.

Within four minutes (yes, I was generous), I knew I could not possibly invest another second in this show. This vapid woman seems to be drunk with power, drunk off her ass half the time, and medicated with some delicious Valium-based sedative the rest of the time. I can see why. I would need to be too, were that my life.

Honestly, I went in thinking I would root for this poor underdog of a Playmate or at least have fun giggling at her cluelessness. Instead, I am just saddened (nearly sickened) by her every choice. She sits, makeup-free, in the interview segments (shooting for intimacy, I guess) and I wonder, how metaphorically naked can one be while adorned with fake nails, fake boobs, bleached hair, and the facial track marks associated with botox injections.

I realize I am feeling sorry for this woman. That can't be what the executives at E! had in mind when putting this show together. Or is pitty-viewing a draw that people have begun to hope for? I realize that there are very few new ideas hitting the tube these days, and perhaps the train wreck syndrome was destined to be the new stab at Must See TV.

After watching one episode, I was ready to soak my eyeballs in acid. But then I found myself tuning in again. Why? Perhaps I'll never know. Perhaps I can blame my interest on that catchy theme song. And, of course, any TV show that has its own drinking game within two weeks of its premiere deserves at least a second look. I suppose, as long as I'm cultivating a TV-based drinking problem, I might as well let Anna Nicole be the one who drives me to drink.

Posted by bonnie at 1:37 PM

When Delete Keys Attack

I've read some Blogs. I have some thoughts. I'm very excited.

First, though, I'll scattershoot, just to let y'all in on what's going on up in here.

The Book: Got the whole effin' thing indexed and did the TOC, added acknowledgements, web resources, LIC/CIP page, and proofed the design of the back cover. It is really... really... really almost done. I pulled an all-nighter (no big whoop) last night to get the page numbers verified on all index entries, and then was too wired and fired to fall asleep even for a little bit. I tried, but I was just too fitfully energetic over actually being THIS CLOSE to the end product of all of this work.

The Man: Keith is working on The Learning Channel's "Scene of the Crime." It's in its second season, starting in December, and he's going to (new news) be in TWO of the first six episodes. They dig him so much that they asked him to do another role in a second episode, and that one shoots tomorrow. He's already put in a week on the set and he's having a blast. His play closed last weekend. His first LA stage show. He has another play in the works, plus shooting on two films in the next couple of weeks. No... no one in this town has ever seen anything like this. It's just effin' amazing.

The Paper: Doing better with the powers-that-be lately. I think my attitude adjustment really helped. I just decided to NOT work my ass off so much. Make them come after me sometimes instead of over-providing more than enough information and then getting pissed when they ignore it and disregard my worth. Just interviewed SEVEN casting directors for the new Fall TV Season issue. Shows: American Dreams, Everwood, Good Morning Miami, MDs, Odyssey 5, Presidio Med, and Push, Nevada. That's going to be a kick-ass issue and I'm pretty dang proud of scoring some of those interviews. Got a call from the associate publisher today. A happy, happy man.

The Management Company: Very scaled back from the big push in late June. I'm much happier for that right now. We'll gear back up in October, and I already have a stack of submissions (headshots and resumés) from actors who want me to represent them. That's kind of fun. The pain in the ass of management wheels, deals, and character breakdowns for every film, TV show, commercial, music video, and corporate hoo-hah is just a little overwhelming, still. We'll see if that gears up to full speed.

The Publishing Company: I've now had a casting director and a monologue writer ask if we'll publish their books. Could be that THIS is the focus I'd rather have... we shall see. I've been answering actor questions on the Career Chat forum of Back Stage West's site, plus on The Actor's Bone. I've been asked to start doing that on a site called Actor Point, and I think I will try to do that too. Oh... and we're corporate sponsors for a new short film festival. Woo hoo!

D: She's on vacation (still). She left the day after our "healing" phone call for a month-long trek across the country and back. She's taking this one last month of disability before going back to work in September. She'll still have reconstructive surgery and implants ahead of her, but she's delaying that quite a bit, just for her own sanity.

The Body: Contemplating going on the Atkins diet. Saw the Dateline NBC show where one of their correspondants has lost 50 lbs. in the four years he's been on it and blah blah blah. No real passion about diving into it... but I do like the idea of that nice, fast, 14-day induction period where you drop like 10 lbs. That would get me geared up about just about anything more moderate. We'll see. No decisions yet... though I am looking at what that cool George Foreman Grill my cousin Joni sent me can do. ;) Actually, the more I think about Atkins, the scareder I get. I'm kind of freaking out about doing something that radically different from what I do every day now. Also, wondering if I'm just setting myself up for yet another food plan thing by which to be disillusioned. Sigh... don't know. I feel as though I'll be going back on my overarching commitment to myself to just be gentle with and good to myself. Why can't I just love me and the skin I'm in?

The Wedding: Toying with the idea of marrying at the stroke of midnight on the New Year... anyone planning a Vegas trip for that time of year?

The Kitties: Still crazy. Salema has really come out of her shell (even more). She's just a hussy and that's so much fun to see happening (always fun to see a hussy realize her true self). Archie is Archie. Fat and happy.

The Weather: Unseasonably low temps, which is just delightful. Love love love the cooler weather. Local news teams described it as "winter-like" today. God, I love LA.

The Random Thought: I miss music. I haven't listened to music in a really long time and I think that's just really sad.

What Else? Oh... my fingernails have FINALLY recovered from the hell that was acrylics for Sissa's wedding. They are lovely once again, which makes me really happy. It's the little things, really. Painted them ice blue tonight. Reminds me of 1996. Ah...

Okay... as I watch Fletch on Starz, I shall respond to Blogs. Yay!

Boston Amy: Yay! You read my Blogs! I too wonder if Sean ever saw Reign of Fire and, if so, what he thought of it. Hmm... how can I make you famous? Well, I'm not sure really. I just told Keith, a year ago, "Come to LA and I'll make you famous," and, well... just look at him now! So, if you're bored, come on down (said in my best Bob Barker voice) and we'll see what we can do. As for living with (and off) me 'til the fame kicks in... I don't see why not... you like a couch and PB&J and cats, right? Peace Corps sounds good. What's the deal with that? I'm sorry about the whole "working with the morally bankrupt" thing. That sucks. Have you read Barbara Sher's books? She wrote I Could Do Anything, If I Only Knew What it Was and Wishcraft. Those were both really good for helping me figure out what I wanted to do when I knew I HAD to stop working at Athens Academy.

Big Mike: Yay! You read my Blogs! Milk in Korean just really looks like what milk should be called, y'know? Ooyoo... that's just perfect! "Keeping Sara in Frosted Flakes" is a great name for a band, don't you think?

BJ: I once ordered candy from this great Australian catalog (back when I was dating Dominic the Aussie and wanted to surprise him with some faves from home). Musk Lifesavers are the nastiest ANYTHING on the planet. Why anyone would want to put that in their mouth is beyond me. Ick. Tastes like that bad roll-on perfume that I once mistook for my strawberry roll-on lipsmacker. I not only burned my lips with the strong alcohol content but I tasted that fragrance for days. That's what Musk Lifesavers are like. Don't get suckered in. Sounds like you had fun in Vegas. Wonky is one of my all-time favorite words ever.

Cash: Hi. Are you out of college yet?

Chip: Congrats on getting Chippernet back up and running. Phew. Oh, I don't think you read my Blogs. Really. But I keep asking... just in case... why is it that Jane's link never turns purple like the rest of ours? Why is she special in your heart? And WHAT do the letters (tqzopufcppl) at the top of the Spy Notebook page mean? I know I've asked before and I've tried to figure it out, but I'm just so lost. Please help me, Obi Wan. You're my only hope. Oh... that reminds me (for some reason) that my friend Steven was on Beat the Geeks yesterday. He won. He beat the Movie Geek. I think he gets killed in a Troma Films movie now. Very cool. You should go be on that show. Sorry that school has started and it's already evil. Who got boobies this summer? Remind me who's in the class of 2003. I know those were some of my kids. 2006... Would I have taught any of them? Maybe they were my 4th graders in the after school program? Hmm. Say hi to daddy for me (is he leaving?). And anyone else who may still remember me anymore.

Courtney: Yay! You read my Blogs! Add me to the list of folks with TMJ. Have you tried one of those night-time mouth guard things? You get it semi-melted in warm water and then mold it to your bite. It keeps you from grinding and clicking in the night. Your dad sending cigars to Joe sounds like something my dad would do. No clue what kind of person I am or anything... just thinking he's all thoughtful. Ugh. Dads. I agree with you about reparations for slavery descendants. That's a complicated issue, for sure. Very cool for you that you're doing weights. Back when I was doing gym workouts I had an idea for those treadmills, bikes, stair-steppers and anything else that they put in front of a bank of television screens. At our gym, they'd started putting mini TVs on these machines and renting out headphones so you could choose your channel, pay them to show you a video, or just listen to music, etc. Well, I decided that what I'd most like to do with that 40 minutes was surf the Internet. So, I came up with this concept to put a keyboard/mouse combo thing where the handle bars for your contraption are. Then, your screen would be the monitor. You could check web-based email and get all of your news and stuff and, if you're a working type, you'd be getting work done while working out (which was what I needed to do). I would get so impatient thinking of all the things I could be doing while I was "wasting time" working out (hmm... wonder how my ass got so big again) and this just seemed to be such an easy and do-able solution. Heck, they may have done it by now. Last time I was in a gym and thinking of this was three years ago. Anyway... tell me about your Pilates class. I bought Pilates for Dummies recently and haven't even looked at it yet. I feel shame. But I'll do it... I love that stuff. Just very NOT eager to start anything right now. Not sure what that's about. In a funk, I guess... which is weird considering how happy I am, generally, right now. Oh, wow... you mentioned hummingbirds making you smile. My mom's favorite bird to have visit the feeder at her office window was a hummingbird. So, since she died, I've seen more hummingbirds than I'd EVER seen in LA. I've decided that they are her, coming to say hello and remind me she's with me. So, they make me happy too. I especially like them when they park. Oh, Courtney, how much do you charge for editing? The casting director who asked me to publish his book first needs an editor (in a major way). I have to decide if I'm going to publish the book, of course, but I also have to decide whether I'll make him get it edited elsewhere or pay me to do it (and, if he pays me... how much I should charge... or if it would be worth more to me in the long run to just keep a bigger cut of the book sales). So... what's the fee structure for that kind of work?

Shelley: I'm mad no one shared sushi. That's one of the great pleasures of having sushi... sharing. Hmph. Spoilsports! Oh, I am glad to read you "boo, hiss" on milk. I'm not a milk person myself, so that's cool. The only thing milk is good for is calves. I think I may steal your champagne and carrot cake anniversary feast. That sounds like something I could really enjoy... and maybe Keith would like that too. Yes... let's try that. Thanks!

Susan: Yay! You read my Blogs! I think we can make you famous too. It's really all about The Bonnie System, which will be the subject of my next book. Of course, the next book will be called Self-Management for Actors, but I think I'll still be instructing The Bonnie System (just don't think that concept will sell as well under that name, for some reason... even though I find it to be very fitting and intriguing).

Tina: Do B vitamins help you relax? They get me all hopped up and racing. I have to be careful, because if I have too much B, I get a blood-too-close-to-the-surface-of-my-skin rash thing. But, if it helps with TMJ and grinding... maybe I should try it. I agree with the crap that is the demise of the cents symbol on the keyboard. Should we take bets on what the next symbol to go will be? It's kind of like the appendix... the symbol no one uses... hmm... what would that one be? I can't decide.

Trevor: "It's foggy and that's what you do" is the best line ever. Naps are the best. If massage, chiropractic adjustments, and siestas were mandated, there would be no war. I am convinced of that. I loved your note about the house and learning the moods and patterns of one another. Very sweet. Very.

Okay... I guess that's it for me. Beverly Hills, 90210 is coming on shortly and I have to get ready for my nightly (insomniac special) fix. God bless Aaron Spelling.
--
Bon

Back at the Ward: "Are you actually calling me witty and clever? Quick... someone take her temperature! I'm just a schmuck with a computer." - Katy, The Psycho Ward, 22 May 2001

Posted by bonnie at 4:41 AM

August 12, 2002

Hi Bloggers.

Does anyone read my Blogs? I can never tell from reading y'all's whether you ever read mine. I must be pretty dang boring. Or sporadic. Or both. Hrm.

Amy... move to LA. I'll make you famous. I said that to Keith last year and today he's on the set of his new TV show. Boom.

Chip... yes, update the Spynotebook layout. And make Jane's link turn purple like all the rest once it's been read. And get rid of my Athenstown account (or change the username). It's all porn and Spam and ick. I would love to see the Blogs in order of most recently updated. That would so motivate me.

Oh, and it wasn't your sister's birthday the other day. It was another Lori's. Sorry.

How ARE you? Timmy... Brandon... it's been a rough week.

David... I'm doing walks (hopefully) every day. Maybe if we have a pact that we'll both do 30 minutes every day, we could keep to it. Back in Athens, I was soooo good about doing my Oglethorpe/Athens Regional loop walk. Man, I loved it. I miss that.

Tina... you crack me up! I made a crack about Brandon and got scowled at. I'd like to hang out with you. We could scowl back together.

Trevor... count me in on fake Blogging. Yes please.

Okay. Back to editing. The book should go to the printer this week or next. Still working on the back cover. Anyone want to write a testimonial? Tee hee.

Bye.

Posted by bonnie at 8:59 PM

July 28, 2002

Hi Bloggers

It's Sunday night in Los Angeles and Keith is out shooting a commercial for Saturn. He's been on set since 5:30am which means $$$$$. Yay. He's very happy. Booked a Discovery Channel TV show that shoots next week. My working actor fiancé. Ah.

My wrists are sad. I've been working on my book so much that I have very sad joints and wrists. I used to have a really cool pair of Handeeze Gloves, which I'm guessing I loaned out or lost or packed away somewhere. Can't find them since Keith moved in, so I blame that event for the fact that I can't find something I used to always use. Blast. So, I'm typing with my hands wrapped up in my Krav Maga wrist wraps, which really aren't made for typing support.

Anyway...

Last night I flew into a rage that I don't understand. I don't know where it came from or why it was so intense, but I don't really "get" me lately. Struggling, struggling.

Okay... Blog replies...

Amy: I love the concept of Punk Rock aerobics. I think I could really get into that. Yum... sweet tea. I miss that. And how cool to spy Forest Whitaker like that. Very cool.

Big Mike: It sounds as hot in Korea as in LA. Or at least the Valley. Ugh. Hang in there!

BrYan/BJ/Beej: I so understand the whole "unable to interact with people" feeling. Excellent choice, listening to Robyn Hitchcock. One of my faves. Oh, and for Vegas... I'm a big fan of the Luxor if for no more reason than the inclinator and the slanty-window rooms. Love it.

Cash: So political these days. Wow! Go, boy!

Chip: How was Goldmember? I want to hear about it. Worth's b'day and I missed it? Tell him I said HAPPY DAY please. I so miss him! All of them. I'm glad you hung out and listened to stories of the po' old days. That makes him happy as your grandpa. What a sweetie!

Chip: I am such a fan of correcting people in their emails. I don't do it often, but man if you catch me at the right time... ooh, I cut loose. Way to go on that y'all thing. I get so pissed about that one. My big thing lately is getting these stupid five year old rumor emails with all of our addresses in the TO line to share and share and Spam... and I copy and paste the snopes.com link and reply to ALL to make a dang point. I just don't care anymore. I have no time for that crap these days! 448 unanswered emails in my inbox. Don't tell me Bill Gates is going to send me money or that the government is trying to tax email. Grr. It's like the Internet has become P.T. Barnum's playground.

Chip: I am such a fan of Big Brother 3. I never saw Big Brother 2... but I'm loving this so much more than the first Big Brother. One thing I hate (two things, really): you have to pay to watch the all-the-time cam online (so sucks) and we don't get to vote off the sparest of them all. Why did they take that away from us, Chip? Why?

Chip: Two more things... tell SMason I said hi while she's in town. AND kill my Athenstown email address (or change it to something else like bonnieg or something). It's nothing but Spam anymore and most of it really icky stuff. Thanks!

Courtney: I tried to check myself in on the 6th floor before. That's still my favorite phrase, when I'm losing it, "I'm so 6th floor!" It just says so much, y'know? I'm sorry you're finding bottles hidden around the house. That's not good. Bless your heart. Hang in there and please keep us posted. I'm guessing this is a well-traveled road for you two and that you will handle everything with love and hope. I'll be thinking of you.

Jane (or Chip): Why does your link stay blue after I've read your blog? Is this some trick to make me think I haven't read yours yet? ;) BTW, nice to meet you.

Shelley: Your drive through Death Valley at 121 degrees reminds me of my drive through Needles at 119 degrees. We were running no AC b/c it overheated the U-Haul... we were towing my car behind it (a 17-footer) and the "we" was my father (from whom I'd been estranged for years) and my 13-year-old cat, who was hyperventilating. I think it was the saddest cross-country trip in August anyone ever conceived of trying. I think being 23 makes one very optimistic. I'd never do such a thing now. LOL.

Tina: Oh my gosh, you're blogging! Is St. Simon's anything like Amelia? It's the one I remember riding bikes around. We could do the whole coastal loop on dirt bikes. Felt so free. I was a kid, but I have fond memories. If I've been to St. Simon's, it's where I went with my ex-beau back in 1992. Can't remember, though. Just know we ate lots of crab, worked crossword puzzles, flew kites, and tried to avoid hearing "Achy Breaky Heart" on the radio. I think we also went to see Batman when it opened. Not that any of this should be of interest to anyone other than me.

I would love Snopes TV shows! YES!

Okay, my latest drama is this: D. The friend with cancer I've been taking care of for the past six months.

First off: I love her. Really really really really I do.

Second: I needed to NOT go take care of her during last week's chemotherapy session and after-care. I've done it every time and really felt like I'd be too broken to take care of either one of us, if I didn't stop and take care of me first. So, I told her I couldn't be there, but because I gave only two days' notice, she got mad. The bummer is, the email she sent to tell me she was mad never got to me. She sent a fairly abrasive email about my "ignoring her" and being one who is "not to be counted on" and I was so mad. Turns out, it's because I never got the first email from her that she thought she was being ignored. Ugly situation all the way around, when all I was trying to do was take care of myself first but was too afraid of hurting her to have just called and talked the whole thing out. I said, when she wanted to fight about this, "Let's deal with all of this AFTER you're well, when we can really understand each other."

She seemed to agree to that (after taking some really low... though well-informed -- damned intimacy -- swipes at me about things she knew would hurt me) and I thought we were going to be okay, even though she was still hurt by my choice to take care of me and lack of communication.

The other morning, I had a series of late-night and early-morning emails from her. Wow. She was lucid and really analyzing our friendship and lessons together. She had some of it wrong, so I engaged her in the dialogue she started.

Oops.

I have to remind myself that she's operating at diminished capacity on many levels, even if she may seem "all there" for moments here and there. So, after her last round of abuse-filled, ego-bruising emails, I just replied:

"Fair enough. I love you."

I feel like such a bad person, even though I know... I KNOW better.

Anyway, it's been hard. But somehow, I'm better for having taken care of me, even if it means that our friendship is over. I hate to think that all of my hard (and loving) work for her has been undone by the fact that I overestimated my ability to continue taking care of her for this long at the expense of me. Ugh.

So, besides the book (which is awesome at making me happy), that's my deal right now. Go check out my book's site: http://cricketfeet.com/castingqs (I'm so proud). Tee hee.

Okay, bye now! XXOO for tonight.
--
Bon
Back Stage West - Casting Qs with Marki Costello, on sale August 1st

Posted by bonnie at 11:57 PM

July 25, 2002

Enders

About a year and a half ago, Psycho asked a group of us single folk to share with him what we considered to be our "Enders" when on a date. I've been in a serious relationship for about a year now, but I did make some notes back then and--finally--I'm ready to share them with you.

Here's how the whole thing started. Psycho said, "Assume you are dating. What counts as an Ender on a date?"

Here's what I came up with.

Me: I'm having fun. Thanks for asking me out.

He: Me too. Next date, we'll go to my bible study class.

or

He: Me too. You're a much better kisser than your ex-boyfriend told me you were.

or

He: Yeah, you looked pretty desperate, so I knew it wouldn't take much to impress you.

or

He: Cool. When do we get to the part of the date where you blow me?

or

He: Mind if I shoot up?

or

He: Shut up, bitch, no one cares what you think.

or

He: I've been dreaming about this moment. I love you.

or

He: Oh, shit, there's my wife. Quick, get under the table.

Sadly, these were non-fiction accounts I came up with pretty readily. Since then, I've recalled what was the all-time Ender for me.

A guitarist and I had been dating for, oh, about six months or so. We'd known each other for years and years and finally got together for a purely sexual relationship that eventually evolved into some more "traditional" human connections (in other words, we TALKED sometimes). Honestly, I think we both would've been happier had we never attempted to stray from the "fuck buddies" status we began with.

Sigh.

Anyway, when he came to visit me in LA for a week, we had a blast together. Truly. We did all sorts of touristy things that we both enjoyed, drank, saw bands, had lots of sex. You know. On the last full day of his stay, we were at my apartment--hanging out in my room, and he decided he wanted to go downstairs to watch "The Simpsons" on TV. I asked, "Why don't you just watch it on the TV up here?"

Now... here's where it became an Ender. I'm thinking he's going to say he prefers the larger TV... or perhaps he'd like for me to join him downstairs so that we can watch it together away from my room, etc. His answer?

"Nah. I want to watch on the downstairs TV. It's closer to the beer."

Yeah. Every time I wanted to miss him from then on, I just remembered that line.

Hell, I can't fault the guy. At least he knows his priorities.

Posted by bonnie at 1:39 PM

July 11, 2002

All right, dangit.

It's a zillion degrees in here and Stompy Stomperson has his floor fan on upstairs (and it shakes the whole effin' apartment... including my poor head). I have a wet washcloth draped around my neck. I think I need to store my undies in the freezer. Whose idea was this summer thing?

It's my birthday today. Aack! 32? Dear GAWD, how did that happen? You're next, Chip.

I'm already stuck on Big Brother Three. Never watched Two. But this is better than the first one, anyway. So far.

I'm about over all of my little jobs right now. I'm not paid enough and I'm not respected enough and dammit if I could just finish the edits on my book, I could start making some bank off of it and then tell everyone to shove it.

Man, I'm in a punchy little mood today. I think I'd like to have a Diablo. They were drinking that last night on BB3 and I had some on the 4th at a BBQ. It's good. No idea what it is, though. Lemon Zima, perhaps? Makes me feel like Rusty on MadTV.

Now that Chip has segregated Spies by when we last Spied, I'm so all over posting (especially b/c I'd rather Blog than edit). Way to go, Cash... getting to stay in the top list. ;) Thank you for Blogging on my b'day.

Okay. Must suck on some ice cubes.

XXOO

Posted by bonnie at 8:10 PM

June 27, 2002

The Eighth Deadly Sin

Did you ever see the movie "Se7en" starring Morgan Freeman and Brad Pitt? Well, without giving away the ending for anyone who hasn't seen the dang movie yet and is still counting on the element of surprise, let's just say that I am a less-violent version of Kevin Spacey's character. If I had the time, I would keep a library full of notebooks in which I'd written down every infraction every idiot I've ever encountered has made. Of course, I would have a better organizational system than Mr. Spacey, but that's not the point.

I had this epiphany while driving. I became so annoyed by the poor driving habits of Los Angelinos that I decided I had to come up with a way to vent my anger. I cannot keep my fury bottled up. When someone doesn't signal when turning, I actually take it personally (I know, I know... I am NOT stable... I own that fact). When someone changes lanes in an intersection, I scream at the top of my lungs. And when someone parks in such a way that I cannot park near them, I want to key my dissatisfaction into the paint job of their hood.

So, I began thinking: why not keep a list of license plate numbers of these evil-doers? I mean, not to call the cops on them or anything, but just as a reference for those of us who are PERSONALLY offended by idiot drivers. My fellow obsessive-compulsives and I could cross reference our lists and make sure that we have as much information as is possible to share about these bozos. We could start a message board for reporting driving infractions.

Yeah, I know that this could end badly. Vigilante OCD'ers could decide to take out some form of retribution for the infractions we've collectively listed by those idiots in SUVs and other vehicles worth more than the house I grew up in. But, is that REALLY such a bad thing?

I mean, isn't the world a better place when we all arrive alive? I mean... all except for those of you who really do need remedial driving class and a big "Watch Out, I'm an Idiot" bumper sticker. Wait... I know. We don't need to hurt these folks. Let's put them all on their own island and let them drive around together. Darwin will win out and they'll be extinct before too long anyway.

I like that. Someone get on that.

See... I'm definitely not a Kevin Spacey-caliber villain. I am too lazy to execute my evil plans. That's probably a good thing.

Posted by bonnie at 1:40 PM

May 26, 2002

Second Blog of the day.

Man, I am so on this twice-a-day routine!

Chip, I do not have your "Can't Hardly Wait" DVD, but I do have your "10 Things I Hate About You" soundtrack.

Chip and/or Jocelyn, which Dunkin' Donuts died? Not the one next to the Milledge Taco Stand... that would SUCK. Why? What are they putting where it was?

Chip, where are the bear chairs?

Chip, how cool... Shamp money is good money! Is Mike the same Mike who came after me? Is he the football coach yet?

Chip, do I know Ellis? How about Colleen?

Chip, Coconut Kiss sounds good.

Chip, Summer of Funner is my kind of slogan. What's the goal for this year?

Courtney, I am happy you're moving to CA, just b/c it increases the chances we'll intersect... but you don't seem too happy about it. I'm sorry. What can I do besides invite you down to LA for some social fun??

Courtney, if they could move all the stuff that makes LA LA to Athens, I would so move back there and be with you for drinks and conversation. I am a big fan of Athens, as everyone knows... but just as DC people need to be in DC, Hollywood people need to be in Hollywood. Alas, it's true. But we can always raise a glass via Spynotebook.

Courtney, can't wait to hear your tales of the Baltic Sea.

Courtney, I watched X-files and I hadn't in a few years. I didn't feel caught up, b/c I've missed so much, but I also didn't feel cheated of anything they left out. I thought it was pretty good. Not the kind of review you'd hope for... but that's what I have to say on the subject. I still really enjoy reruns of my favorite old episodes on FX. Oooh... FX is also where my old 90210s live... so that's a happy channel for me (until that Ally McSkinny comes on... I never got any of that drivel).

Oooh, I loved the prom pix too. That backdrop was genius. Makes me want to have a prom in LA just so I can fancy the place up a bit. How very very cool! And yes, what the hell was Cash? A Star Wars thing?

Oh... did anyone see the Conan O'Brien Triumph the Insult Comic Dog sketch with all of the people in line at Star Wars? Greatness. Get a copy of it, if you can. Brilliant.

Courtney, you made me sad, saying you've been halfway in a coma for two years. I so get that. Hang in there, baby. You'll wake up. Soon.

Stephanie H., I too was a big fan of Felicity mainly for The Box. I haven't watched in years... so I really gave up and bailed on it... so, I don't know what they ever said about anything... but I recall an interview with JJ Abrams in which he mentioned that The Box was along the lines of the briefcase in Pulp Fiction. Does that help?

Stephanie H., I love that you can sit outside and knit at work. That is great! Oh, I shipped all of Mom's knitting- and crocheting-in-progress back to Dawn here in LA. She does that yarn craft stuff that I do not do... and she is finishing one of Mom's crochet blankets as a wedding present for me. Very sweet. I can't tell what Mom was knitting... not far along enough to decipher.

Shelley! I'm Fozzie too! I want to apologize for dropping off the face of the earth after you were so great to get us all of that wonderful bike-wreck attorney info. Keith talked with the guy here that was referred by your guy in SF and he (the local attorney) said we should self-claim rather than filing a lawsuit, since it's a lock of a case... and we will end up with more money if we do the settlement directly. I thought that was a pretty decent thing to say. He was pretty cool, talking about how anyone would want the case, since it's an easy one. But... that means we have work to do to make it all happen. Translation: I have to do it. Anyway, it's all writing (letters, claims, etc.). I'll keep you posted on how it goes.

Shelley, what is wrong with your poor back? I'm so sad! Can you still bike? When faced with Naproxen vs. Vicodin, I personally would go with Vicodin, but I'm a junkie like that. My friend with cancer (who has been on just about every drug in the past few months) prefers the Naproxen b/c it doesn't hurt her tummy nearly as much. Be careful.

Oh, and I have to put my shoulder blades together too (and, being a 38C, that's a nice big boob-sticking-out situation) for a car accident I was in back in 1991. I'll never be all fixed, in my spine, but that is a good posture to work on. Yoga is good. Pilates too.

Congrats on the new iMac. Has anyone seen the ad for the Mac toilet? I should post a link. Hang on... lemme look for it. Ah... here 'tis. Remember the iBrator? Tee hee.

Okay... here are the photos from my trip to Florida
and Georgia (including connecting with Chip at T-Stand... man, I should've eaten more. I still crave it). Enjoy.

That's it for now. Back to Alias and Chianti. Cheers!
--
Bon
Barry's book

"They've been on three dates! I dated a guy for six years, almost married him and I didn't get anything better than a Motel 6 in Arlington." - Jamie, in Somesuch-Whatnot, 1/28/02

Posted by bonnie at 9:52 PM

I'm feeling pretty good.

This weekend I have...

- organized the mountain of papers that was once my fiancé's desk
- acquired a dozen tiny scratches while attempting to show restraint when all I wanted to do in life was kidnap Rose's parents' two new kittens
- rearranged the furniture to have better Feng Shui in our apartment
- moved a few of the non-plant plants outside (shhh... don't tell psycho landlady or she'll call the cops) so that dead soil is now farther away from my open windows
- washed, dried, and folded four loads of laundry (thanks Rose's parents' washer/dryer)
- formatted and printed 100 chapters of my book, hole-punched the pages, and put them all into three binders to begin the organization and editing process (dear GAWD this is a huge project)
- grilled veggies, baked cookies, and washed dishes
- taken two naps
- watched the Indy 500, as per usual (my one guilty alone-time pleasure since 1995)

Okay... now what?

Posted by bonnie at 9:01 PM

May 23, 2002

That Which Does Not Kill You...

My friend has cancer.

As I write this, I am seated next to her. Between us is a hanging rack of various drugs, all dripping into her body through a PICC line.

During the second of three drugs administered via IV push, she sucked on a Popsicle. The cold is supposed to keep her mouth from developing sores.

Her wig is on crooked, but it's kind of cute that way. She has the cutest wig of everyone in the chemo facility: lovely blonde streaks through a dark brown mass of hair thicker than hers ever was. She was more stressed about losing her hair than she had been about losing her breasts, but she's into being bald now. She's whipped off her wig in public a few times now, and it's always in an inspired show of solidarity for someone else on this journey.

By her 35th birthday, she'll be through with this mess. That will be a huge celebration. But my friend celebrates every day. Even when she's tossing her cookies, she's laughing about it. Even when she can't see straight, she's joking about her hallucinations. She has faced death several times over and still finds joy in her life.

I had to give her an injection the other day. You go through so much with your friends and you never imagine that you will be inserting a needle into a tummy... but then the need is there and you do it. Period.

My friend has cancer - but in a few months, she will have a body in which no cancer cells can survive. And then, if she's lucky, she'll be clean for another ten years. Maybe.

There are no guarantees - but we all know that. So, with each mechanically-measured drip from the Omni-Flow 4000 Plus, another prayer goes forth: that my friend is not just surviving cancer, but kicking its ass.

Posted by bonnie at 1:41 PM

May 19, 2002

Hello again, my Blogging friends.

Wow. Twice in one day! Maybe I actually WILL make a comeback of some kind.

All I have to say right now is... I still have a LOT to read before I can start catching up with comments to each of you. From what I've read, everyone's been very busy and I can't wait to catch up completely. Oh, and Chip... both PROM and the pics from the T-Stand rock! And YOU rock. I hope the Archie comics (or at least the Cap'n D's one) bring you some money or at least some joy!

Meanwhile, I DID go take a few quizzes (I am such a sucker) and here's what I learned about me.

	You are Fozzie! Wokka Wokka! You love to make lame jokes. Your sense of humor might be a bit off, but you're a great friend and can always be counted on..
Take the What Muppet Are You? Quiz!

Which My So-Called Life Character Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz, by Angel.

Such a cool Me!

Oh, and here's the Anatomically Correct Oscar billboard by Guerrilla Girls. Love it!

Love y'all. Be well! Have a safe and happy Mercury Retrograde. XXOO

Posted by bonnie at 9:59 PM

I'm not dead!

I'm not dead! I'm sorry I've been so out of touch. I've been doing Nurse Bonnie duty, plus had to go out of town for two weeks to attend the Royal Wedding of Clearwater and to have Taco Stand with Chip. The latter was definitely far better.

I'll attempt to catch up on all of the blogging I've missed, plus catch y'all up on me, once time permits. Meanwhile, know I've missed being in touch with you all and hope everyone is having a happy Mercury Retrograde. XXOO
--
Bon

While DeadLaszlo wasn't looking: "I am almost positive we're interested. Needs to be run past the Ninjamunkey, and he's busy building a work bench in the garage with 8 Fingered Greg at the moment. Put us down for a tentative in." [Ali, on Theft of Orange Socks, 13 October 2001]

Posted by bonnie at 10:15 AM

April 25, 2002

Engaged To Dread

Being engaged is pretty fantastic. I highly recommend it. I have been engaged for five months now and have another five months of being engaged to go.

The first hour and a half of being engaged, I was speechless. Yes - me: speechless.

Something I never anticipated about being engaged was the permission complete strangers feel they have to ask about the wedding just because they recognize a piece of jewelry as a representation of engagement. Even stranger is my willingness to share intimate details about my wedding plans with anyone who asks.

The plans themselves are pretty sparse, actually. I'm pretty anti-wedding. I just attended a $35,000 170-guest affair and the bulldog of a wedding planner alone has turned my stomach. I'm hoping to do our wedding at about one-tenth the scale, all the way around.

One of the biggest issues, currently is the family. Mine is fractured and dysfunctional, as most families are. My fiancé's is no better. One major difference is that his family is happy to stay out--way out--of our lives. Mine is not. Of course, I'm too politely Southern and female to tell my folks where to stick their overblown fantasies of how my wedding should be. Don't let anyone fool you: being a Southern Belle in 2002 sucks.

That's not entirely true, but it is true enough, where wedding days are concerned.

Currently, I'm considering elopement. Now, if I can only convince my fiancé that it's a great idea!

'Til then, I'm going to milk this heavy ring finger. "Yes. Someone wants me. Someone wants the whole world to see that I am his and no one else's." Never mind the stress that the WEDDING has already caused... being ENGAGED rocks.

Posted by bonnie at 1:42 PM

March 22, 2002

I'm a Prick

Recently, I began engaging in a practice that makes me almost entirely "Hollywood."

Acupuncture.

I took my friend to her appointment and decided to ask whether these folks could ease my headaches with some ancient needology. Sure enough, they can!

Sign me up!

So, now twice a week, I lie on a table wearing nothing but a blue paper ass-exposing robe thing while three Asians put needles into my head, neck, arms, stomach, legs, and feet. Then, they connect the needles to some sort of electromagnetic generator (SO not an ancient eastern medicine technique) and turn out the lights. Within a few moments, I am filled with sharp pulses of energy. A woman has entered the room to put a heat lamp near my skin and burn marijuana-scented sage over my toes. And so my treatment begins.

I know I'm supposed to be at peace. I know I am supposed to breathe deeply and fall into a meditative state. I am supposed to let the energy flow through me and feel stronger, renewed.

Here's what I'm doing instead: envisioning experiencing an earthquake during a treatment. I imagine the ten of us, each in private rooms, emerging to evacuate the building. We are mostly naked, filled with needles, and attached to battery chargers. Can you imagine the sight of the street below - filled with human pincushions?

When the clinicians come in to remove my needles, they always say, "Wow. You're not afraid of needles?" I guess this is an indication of the fact that I let the doctor put dozens of needles in at once, whereas many patients will only endure a few per treatment. As the clinicians remove needles one after the other, they marvel at my willingness to have so many needles inserted at once.

No. I'm not afraid of needles. The scariest part of acupuncture is the San Andreas Fault.

Posted by bonnie at 1:43 PM

March 14, 2002

Hi Bloggers

First off - did my Madd Libs Oscar Speech thingy not come through? I posted it in the TV Blog, so that you could have an opportunity to write your speech before the telecast. Hmm. Lemme see if I can find the link. Ahh... here 'tis: Oscar Speech.

Now... Who watched the Boxing Match on Fox last night? Wow! No surprises in the outcome. I missed Danny's radio show this morning, though. I'm sure it was quite entertaining. Anyone lose money on this crazy event? Ideas of who will be up next?

Blog Comments:

Amy - Thank you for the 411. Very cool to go back and forth to NY and Boston (two favorite cities of mine, along with San Fran, Athens, and DC... hmm... it's like all of my cities are represented in Chippernet. That's so cool). Anyway, I know nothing of Brooklyn, so I guess I really don't know what I'm talking about. Big bummer about the lockers at Penn Station. One of my favorite things to do as a Delta Brat is fly to a city I love with a backpack for a change of clothes, store the airplane dress in the locker at the main terminal and go exploring for the day. I'm guessing that's all out of the question now. I've only taken one flight since 9/11 and that was to Sacramento to see Keith's fam.

Andy - Yay! Good for you! I quit a few years ago! Don't be big tobacco's bitch! Yay for you! Stay strong and watch how healthy you'll feel by summer! Woo hoo!

Big Mike - I so want digital pics of your world. That barber pole story was almost as good as the hotdog one. Keep 'em coming -- and don't get deported! That would suck. Oh, did you do anything touristy yet like go visit the "Axis of Evil" exhibit?

Chip - If you see anything in Athens paying $45k, that's a good thing. Nice high salary for that standard of living. I've only had a couple of jobs (back before freelancing) and the benefits were not included in the total salary I was told I earned. Generally, the benefit packages, if quantified, would be about $8k - $10k, which is a pretty big chunk of the income contracted. Hope that info helps. No matter what, I'm sure you're being underpaid at the Academy, but that's just from my own personal experience there.

Hey, tell me more about your mom building a new house! Will she move the doggie graves?

Courtney - I've only watched about three episodes of the X Files since Duchovny left, and I think two of those were ones where he made a guest appearance or something. Such a damn shame. Yes, the idea is that he will come back for the season (and series) ender and wrap all mysteries up. I hope I remember to watch, but honestly, my heart's not in that show anymore.

I agree that Mike's Blog is way entertaining. Hey Chip, is there a way to list on the main page when each Blog was last updated? I'm just so lazy that I've quit clicking on Cash's, Sean's, and Jenny's Blogs -- and almost missed out on Andy's, but just happened to click on it today.

Yes, Courtney, I guess we shocked the poor little jade plant. We started it out in water and then put it in soil after about two months of it growing new little roots and buds, and, that same day, put it outside, and it was cold that night. So... lots of shock to its system. Oh well, we'll try again. Thanks for the info. I'm just so clueless about all things plant-like.

Glad you like the photo of the cats. They are holy terrors. But I love them so much! Such a nice piece of Mom's energy to have in my life. They really are her two sides, so to speak. As I type this, Archie (the great pumpkin) is sitting on the cordless phone, dialing... well, Big Mike in Korea, probably. Gotta extract that phone before he makes a connection to who knows where. Talented kids, these.

Keith's recovery is coming along, thanks for asking. He's in a lot of pain (shoulder, mainly) and all of his road rash is healing nicely. His big issue is the shoulder stuff and it's pretty bad. Bad news for me is, I pinched a nerve in my back the other day and I had to take his Vicodin. Big scary, being a former pain killer addict, to take anything, but I was in so much pain, I had no choice. Still pretty sore today. Sucks.

Catch Phrase sounds awesome. I am so putting that on my list!

Dera - Yay! Glad to see you blogging again. And I really like the rock pics in your template. Very pretty. And it's wonderful that you survived the ride in the Big Benz. Does Chip have a suitable nickname for the car yet?

Sara - LOL about Big Mike posting from Portland. I really like that idea! Ha ha!

Shelley - YES! Please do share the bike-type lawyer contacts with me! I got an email address from Chip (he's pretty sure it's your address) and emailed you to ask the same, so sorry if this is a duplicate request, but I wanted to be sure to get your attention and definitely take you up on your kind offer to help us connect with someone here. Yes, it was the driver's fault. Already, his insurance company is calling with a settlement offer. Keith is too nice about that kind of stuff. He never wants it to appear that he's taking advantage of anyone, so he's now pretty sure he needs to defer to an expert in the matter, to keep him from being silly and accepting a settlement that will really only cover the cost of the ambulance ride. Again, thanks. Keith has learned that riding a bike in a non-bike-friendly town is not a good idea (even though he was in the frickin' bike lane)!

Susan - Ew to the Phillip Morris employee benefit story. I am SO sharing that with everyone I know. Just really evil! Thanks for the laugh.

Stephanie W. - What are you testing in Amsterdam?

Tina - Congrats on the 4% increase. That's almost a "you rock" raise. ;)

Okay, gang, that's it for me. I'm in too much pain to sit up right now and I really need to finish my article for the paper. Tomorrow is a Nurse Bonnie day for D (errands and such). Her next surgery is Monday. Keep us in your thoughts.
--
Bon
http://www.bonniegillespie.com
Barry's book

My epiphany of the night: I live my life like an interviewer on the red carpet. I'm listening to you. I'm asking (somewhat) intelligent questions. I'm right there with you. But I'm constantly looking just over your shoulder, in case someone better is coming up the path. Now, that's deep. [from Dead Laszlo's Oscar Wrap Edition, 2001]

Posted by bonnie at 1:52 PM

March 9, 2002

I'm addicted to the Game Show Network.

I think I figured out why. It's always happy there. No matter what silliness is going on in the world, there is something very sweet going on on DirecTV 309, and it's just enough to remind me that life is good. It started out with a very healthy Match Game addiction, but now I've realized, that unless it's Let's Make a Deal or Press Your Luck, I'm happy with just about anything on that channel.

I am sweet, like Sugar. I am all sweetness and light; fluffy bunnies and dancing fairies; happiness and joy. Too much of me will make you sick. What Flavour Are You?

I swear I love these quizzes. Much less healthy than my Game Show Network addiction, I'd bet.

Evil Animals

Realizing we've spent more money on these cats this year than on ourselves or the TicTac. That's not sad, it's just devotion to the animals' happiness. Oh, my, do they love the California Condo and the slanted cardboard track with catnip rat hidden inside the case! There's kitty drool all over the dang thing, from them trying to out-mark one another. We JUST brought it home a few hours ago. Oh, boy... another toy to destroy.

Okay, so what's been going on out here and why have I been so non-Blogging? Well...

You already know about D and her breast cancer and the more bad news and the more surgery and the evil harsh chemotherapy and all of that. That's been a major time consumer for me, as, working freelance, I'm the one with the best schedule for helping her and still being able to make a living. I just need her to know, no matter what, she's not alone.

Well, last week (and one day the week before), I subbed in for the casting editor at the paper that runs my column. I do this about once every three months or so and it's a nice little diversion for me, plus a good way to stay in sync with the overall editorial mission of the paper. I've been doing this job in a sub capacity for 2.5 years now. Well, there's been a significant downturn in the quality of service our clients and our readers are getting, in terms of casting notices in the paper. I realized things were about to get really ugly, and in the wake of our latest corporate buyout (we're now owned by a MAJOR media conglomerate--pretty sure that'll get me out of jury duty next month), it's just getting worse. So, I pulled the associate publisher slash editor in chief aside and asked for a meeting (which was fine, because we also needed to discuss my book proposal and the timeline for hearing back on that from New York). I didn't want to be one of those people who just goes, "There's a problem [pointing]. There's one [pointing elsewhere]. Oh, and there's another problem [still pointing]." I want to be the type who says, "There's a problem and here's my idea." So, that's what I did. Looks like my next project will be creating a style manual for casting notices in the paper and doing a little training session with the newer, younger gals in the office about why it is the way it is. During some of the editing last week, the casting assistant said, "Wow! Reading your proofer's marks is giving me so much of a grammar lesson flashback! I'd forgotten that rule." Seems that the casting editor figures it's easier to make all the changes herself rather than tell anyone what the actual right way is to do something... so they never learn and therefore continue making the same mistakes. So, so, very inefficient.

Surreal moment: just saw coach Tubby Smith being interviewed about bobcats on Animal Planet. What the eff is that?

Anyway, as usual, I was asked to come work in the office full-time, something I've turned down again and again. There's just absolutely no way, financially, that they could make that offer worth my time. Still, it was a good week.

On Tuesday, while we were really crunched on the deadline from hell (since the assistant had decided to put off on Monday night all of the things that would've made Tuesday morning a quick once-over prior to production and then an easy stretch), my pager was going off like crazy. Too crazed in the office to return a page, so I just kept letting it go. Finally, we were on to the production phase and the assistant girl went home, very ill, since I could just cover everything else for the day, and I returned the page... to Keith's cell phone. Turns out he'd been calling from Cedars. He'd been hit by a truck while riding his bike to work in Santa Monica. Yep. Day six of his job at Yahoo and he's run over (well, actually, he flipped over the hood of the truck and then landed on his shoulder and head, rolled to his other shoulder and elbow, and then skidded a few feet on his backpack -- big endorsement for Jansport; not a hole in the dang bag, and it kept his back from receiving the same scalping that his shoulders received) on the way there. Of course, it's too soon for any sort of insurance coverage to have kicked in with the job... so, he's in the ambulance on the way to Cedars, having given his bike to the guy in the truck (who took it to have repaired, rebuilt, whatever), and wondering how the hell we're going to afford all of this. He had a CAT-scan and X-rays and got cleaned up, splinted, and sent on his way, Vicodin in hand. My friend Mike went and picked him up, took him home.

Of course, I'm feeling like the most evil girlfriend in the world. My fiancé is trying to get in touch with me and I'm editing in Quark. What the eff?! I suck!

Keith was feeling well enough by last night for us to go out and see Faith Salie (fellow North Springs High School survivor) do standup at the HaHa Café. In attendance were two other North Springs types: (another) Keith, visiting from Atlanta, and Stacy, who lives here in LA. We've all known each other since 1983. Very strange to imagine having known someone that long and still having anything to talk about. Faith was a genius, and she was thrilled that I put together a rather large group of friends to come see her work. I just go out so infrequently anymore that I really do love getting to gather a group to do something fun like see a dear friend do standup. She's got this whole bit about how she's a carney attraction back home in Georgia, being over 29 and unmarried. "Look at the spinster woman, Ashleigh. Don't touch her! You might catch some of that feminism!" Anyway, it's great stuff. Last night, she had new material about being a single mom (to her 31-year-old boyfriend). "This week we're working on putting the toilet seat down." Very cute.

We all went out to a piano bar after and it was such a great scene. There's this massive projection screen and a satellite dish... they're having a major Oscar party there. Could be fun. Not sure yet... there's always so many of those worth going to (I like the one with the biggest cash prize, as I've won the pool three years running). Anyway, it was great to have basketball on where the players were 15' tall... but no sound, so that we could enjoy the vocal stylings of... well, whoever that guy was.

Okay... who famous have I spied of late? Oh, did an interview on the lot of Alias and saw Victor Garber and Patricia Wettig (so, now that her hubby's crossed the line from executive producer to guest-star, looks like she'll be along for a few episodes). Attended a wonderful talk with Sir Ian McKellen that our paper put on Monday night. He was so very generous with his time. His answers about the craft of acting and his take on his journey as a performer and as a man were so genuine. Very cool guy. I got pretty ticked off at all of the, "Would you do Gandolf for us?" questions. So lame, reducing this amazing actor to stupid human tricks. Still, he managed to navigate the fools and handle everything with grace and class. Last night... Stacey Stillman (lawsuit-happy bimbo from Survivor) was at the comedy club. Charles Barkley was at the piano bar. And today, while in a toystore on Rodeo Drive, Keith and I realized we were shopping right next to Mike Myers and his wife. Very cool. It made me giggle.

Question: why is the term "on line" correct for (what I would say) "waiting IN line"? What is this "waiting on line" thing? I don't get it, I don't like it, and I don't buy it. Could someone explain?

Loved catching up on the Blogs. Lemme see if I can get all of my comments in order.

Reading: Courtney - great take on Shakespeare. I'm all over your comments! Excellently worded and so right ON! You would LOVE my friend Barry's short film: Romeo & Juliet, Revisited. I did the makeup, so I may be biased, but dang it's such a great adaptation of The Bard's work.

Watching: Tina - Danny Bonaduce is a morning DJ on a big radio station out here. They taped the boxing match this week. The day of, they were on the air with people calling in non-stop going, "Danny, you are gonna spank a Brady!" And Danny's response, to every caller, was, "That's what *I'm* talkin' about!" It was quite funny, all the trash-talking. Should be interesting to see who wins (of course, they couldn't talk about it after the day of the taping). You've heard, I'm sure, that Amy Fisher had to drop out due to the fact that her parole officer wouldn't let her leave the state for the taping. Tonya Harding ended up fighting Paula Jones, who Danny said was a real hick (no... really?). The mystery fighter against Vanilla Ice was Tod Bridges. Gotta love good TV. I'm so ready to watch that mess!

Amy - why do you go back and forth to New York so much?

Big Mike - how awesome about the hotdogs! That is just the coolest!

Chip - where is this Athens Music Factory? Is it the old place on Clayton that spawned a gun-wielding brawl every other weekend back when I was there? What was that place called? Shae looks great. What grade is she in now? LOL on the Statesboro paper and Worth's new setup. That's just awesome. Please tell the folks I said hi and I love them! Acer haikus rock, baby. You are so gifted with that stuff! Dear GAWD I am SO all over that Dead Letter Office keywrap at eBay! What the eff... you gave up eBay for Lent or something, Chip? What's that about? What can *I* buy for you there, then? I'm so there! Alf bookmarks: I still have mine! And Devlin... man, I had no idea he was still around. How about Ort? Any sightings recently? Oh, and Chip... what do the letters at the top of the page (in the < title >code< / title >) mean? I've tried to figure it out and I'm at a loss. Also... what was the best $750 you ever spent? Tell me!

Courtney - I am so sad about your moth. That's just tragic. Did you have any Jade-related advice for me? What is Catch Phrase? I'd like to know about it. We hung out with a great new couple (the guy was an actor in the film we shot in December, so he and his wife joined us last night for the standup and she's from Texas -- great gal) who want us to come over and play Trivial Pursuit. And I was thinking cards.... So, I'm up for learning about games that are fun and not too silly, but not so crazy that they'll make me super-competitive either.

Jocelyn - I just love all of your fun quiz links and little pictures. Makes me feel like a real slacker for just typing about my life when I Blog, instead of offering up some cool places for you guys to go online. Could I get fired for that?

Susan - Sean in the bathroom... very bizarre. I mean, I know guys are all about their bathroom time... but the CD player and the headphones? That's a little odd. I guess Keith does that too, but he's in a bubble bath when he's in that privacy mode (and usually reading Linux books... the perv).

Trevor - I love your tale of poker! Such good reading, there.

Oh, wow... the messenger guy just showed up (finally) with the blue lines on a casting director's book I'm reviewing for the paper. I think it's called, "Wanna be an Actor? ACT Like One!" and it'll be out in April. He's going to do Rosie, the Today Show, and Regis & Kelley. So, it's been like pulling teeth to get an advance copy of this. I think I'll start reading. Maybe more Blogging in a few days. Keith will take my car a couple of times to work (the bus takes forever) and that'll leave me here with time on my hands for that sort of thing (I hope). We're attending the Garland Awards Monday night (like the LA Tony Awards), Faith's play ("A... My Name is Alice") on Tuesday night, and then Wednesday, I am parking my ass in front of the TV (after doing an interview) so that I don't miss the boxing event of the year. One thing that gets me, with this satellite dish, is that except for the local channels, I have to look at the TV Guide and imagine I'm looking at EST. Dammit if I miss one more Real World/Road Rules Battle of the Seasons due to the time zone crap... I'm gonna... well... I guess I'm gonna wait for the next marathon one weekend and get all caught up. Sigh.

Bye, all. XXOO
--
Bon
bonsite
Barry's book

Yet again: "Red Dwarf makes my brain want to jump through my nose and destroy my television." - Jay, on The Psycho Ward, 7/1/01

Posted by bonnie at 7:29 PM

February 24, 2002

Chip! Love the Benz.

It's so bitchin'! Very very cool. Hey, is your hair really long?

Amy, the exploding dog thing sounds very creepy. Glad everything is okay.

Oh, here's my Trading Spaces self. Don't know this chick, so you'll have to tell me whether I should feel insulted or not.

take the which one of the trading spaces cast are you? quiz!

I WANT TACO STAND! I so miss it!

Oh, I learned, that when you travel far to visit a Chick-fil-A and then fill out a comment card, you'll get, not one, but FOUR coupons for free Chick-fil-As AND a personal note from the manager, who is also from Atlanta. I like that!

Chip, I love the long and weird pic. Very clean room, dude. Or is that why we can't see the floor? ;)

Courtney - help! We nurtured a little Jude Plant thingy and it got little roots and new tops, so Keith planted it and put it outside... and it died. Boo hoo! Now what?

Oh, and kick the ass of that evil neighbor woman.

Sorry... festive mood tonight. Got my article turned in and it's a new Alias in a few hours. Tah!

Posted by bonnie at 6:25 PM

February 23, 2002

Okay, Bloggers, here we go...

Spied one of the stars of Barney Miller and Paul Reiser Thursday at Jerry's Famous Deli. Saw three TV stars yesterday whose names I don't know (like "one of the stars of Barney Miller" is a name), one of them was the backwards-talking-dwarf from Twin Peaks. Also recently spied Nestor Carnoball (or BatManuel from The Tick, Luis from Suddenly Susan). He was with his wife taking a tour of the Birthing Center at Cedars when we were waiting to hear how D's surgery went a couple of weeks ago. I was tempted to take the Birthing Center tour with all of these 8-months preggers ladies and their SOs. Al (D's sister) and I were daring each other to go on the tour together. Had the tour taken place earlier in the surgical day, we'd have gone, just to diffuse the energy.

On to the Blogs...

Amy - Thanks so much for the Spammobile info. I've shared it with my friends in TX, since that's where much of the current visits will take place. Very very cool.

Big Mike - Have you considered eBooks for your journey? I've never been a fan, but it seems, in terms of the heavy factor, that could be a good way to go.

Chipperonie! Love you, man. Still want to see photos of the Benz. Did you pick a license plate yet? Congrats on the digital camera. Can't wait to see what you put up! I give up on the best $750 you ever spent. Could you give us a hint? Keith was Ernie too, when we did the Sesame Street character quiz. So I guess I DO go for the same "type" of guy. Heh heh! Hey, do you want one of my camcorders? You know I have two. If you'd really use one, we could work something out. Oh... and why don't you just borrow one from the Newsteam? Please don't tell me they're still using those huge S-VHS cameras for field work. I think it's great to start sentences with "I"... that way you never have to justify for whom you're writing. You're writing about your experiences from your point of view and that's always great! I'm sorry you've been sick. That's a bummer. Oh, and I want your ReplayTV if you're done with it. Keith still claims that it is all evil spy device stuff, but I'm a big fan of having that sort of TV control. Does anyone know if there's a site that took the place of Prevue.com? I really loved that you could tell it to email you whenever certain criteria you selected would be on TV. Example: I wanted to know whenever John Cusack will be on TV. I would get an email for my viewing grid telling me when he'd be a guest on talk shows, when any of his movies would air, etc. When you go to Prevue.com now you get TVGuide.com, and it has a pretty good search function for that sort of thing, but not at all as cool as what Prevue.com's email thingy. Well... if you know of anything....

Courtney - Did you fly? That could be why you got so sick. Many times, if you're a little sick and board an airplane, the pressure and recirculated air can make you very ill. When was your birthday? I wish you a happy belated one, and hope it was fun! What is Cecelia cake? You should have Coke Cake. Have I told y'all about that? My friend Faith (fellow Atlantan) makes it for every major occasion and it is pure greatness. I'll put the recipe in the Food Blog. It's truly yummy and yes you can substitute Dr. Pepper for the Coke and it's delicious too. I'm all for People's Court and Blogging being considered a full day. Very good stuff, if you ask me! Good luck catching your stray cats. Once upon a time, Mom went on a campaign to get all of the local stray girl cats fixed, even if she then let them back out in the wild. At least that way, they wouldn't get knocked up. Good luck! Oh, your obnoxious woman in class... that's the person I call the Classhole. There's one in every class, and I really appreciate being able to pick that person out (because it means it's not me). Tee hee. Tell me about the Athens Academy Talent Show! Who was great? Anyone I know? Oh, and I love the hiding figurines thing. An old roommate and I used to do that with a pink glitter-woven shoelace. We'd get out on campus and discover it was tied to the back of our jacket or backpack or we'd pour a bowl of cereal and it would be the prize, etc. I think, now 12 years later, I actually mailed the shoelace to her as a baby gift. Great tradition, that! Keep it up!

Jocelyn - The Crazy/Cat Kid song has been in my mind for days. Thank you for that! Unless you saw it being poured in, I doubt champagne was in your Orange Kiss Martini. Most likely Triple Sec, Gran Marnier, or Contreau. The reason I doubt champagne is in there is that, if they're made to order, and not the special drink of the night, there's no way it's profitable for a bar to open a bottle of champagne for a splash in a drink. That's why most bars serve champagne in a Split form (two glasses per bottle). It's just more economical, if they're going to try to sell by the glass. Here's a few recipes from a bar drink site. Do some experimenting! Let me know what you come up with.

From Bar None Drinks.

Orange Martini (would be clear)

3 oz. Vodka
1/2 oz. Triple Sec
Dash of Orange Bitters

Citrus Martini (not clear)

4 oz. Lemon Vodka
1 tsp. Grand Marnier (Or orange liqueur)
1 tsp. Lime Juice (Fresh)

Jamie's Martini (not at all clear, but sounds tasty)

3 oz. Vodka
1/2 oz. Triple Sec
1 oz. Orange Juice (Fresh)
1/4 tsp. Sugar

Soul Kiss (also not clear)

1 oz. Whiskey
1 oz. Martini and Rossi Dry Vermouth
1/2 oz. Orange Juice
1/2 oz. Dubonnet

Sara - I too am 53% evil! I was so sure I'd be more evil than that! Dangit!

Stephanie H. - I too am Zoe. I did not copy the code or grab the image on that one, though, since I have no idea who or what Zoe is. I was so going for Oscar the Grouch.

Okay, so here's my news: The guest speaking thing went really, really well at the acting school. I've gotten tons of email and calls about it. Over 50 people stayed for my little shpiel and they had tons of questions. It was very gratifying. Keith and I went out after for our belated Valentine's Day dinner. We went to the Pacific Dining Car, an enlarged train car restaurant that's been in downtown since 1920. It was really romantic, very laid back, and just perfect. On Sunday, after Keith and I attended a Bridal Expo (dear GAWD, how awful is that?!) I checked in as Nurse Bonnie and stayed with D for most of the week. Her further bad news has really taken its toll on her. And me. Whenever I come home, I get very sad and over-manic. I know that's all a reaction to having to put on a brave face for D so much of the time. So, long week, but I was able to do a lot of my work for the paper from D's, as her dad had just bought her a new scanner, fax, printer combo dealy and that helped me a lot. The book deal memo is in place. I'm very nervous, but excited. It's a good thing. We attended my friend Barry's film screening last night. It was great. I've seen the film a few times now (it's one of the ones on which I did makeup) and this time was my fave, just b/c the crowd was so into it. Very cool. Fabiana, Barry's wife, is having a baby in a few months, and I'm putting together a shower for her. Just got off the phone with Sissa, my best friend from UGA days, whose wedding I'm in at the end of April. I'm going to be doing a whole East Coast tour thing, since she's in Tampa. So, I hope to get to see everyone in Athens after that week in Florida. Anyway, I'm now talking wedding gowns and bridesmaids' dresses and such and it's all just very bizarre, to me. Another old friend from Athens is in LA and we'll be going out for crab nachos on the Santa Monica Pier tonight. That'll be nice. Tomorrow night, I go back to Nurse Bonnie duty for a long week of doctors visits (and Intro to Chemo Class, which D wants me to attend with her). Keith starts his new job at Yahoo Monday. He's very excited, even though he'll never be home anymore. It's a short-term contract, so we'll endure the stress on the relationship and then sit together and count all of the money to make us feel better.

Cats are good. I'm good. Life is good. Just busy, busy, busy, as usual. Love reading y'all's Blogs, so thanks so much for keeping me entertained and amused. XXOO
--
Bon
Barry's book

On The Psycho Ward: "We almost went to Vegas for a honeymoon, but we spent the money on a new fence instead." [Leeming, 5/28/01]

Posted by bonnie at 2:36 PM

February 16, 2002

Ah... another great episode of BH9

I usually don't bother watching them unless they're from The Brenda Years, but this one was the one where Hillary Swank says good-bye and Val is cleaning toilets at the Wyatt Clinic as a part of her probation. David just sold a song to Jasper's Law. Oh, life is good -- except for Brandon, who cheated on Kelly with Emma. No, I am not at all troubled by the fact that this has spawned an intense conversation on the difference between men and women and monogamy and genetic predisposition with my fiancé.

I'm ramping up for a big day. There's an Open House at an acting school. Keith will be attending as an actor type and I will be attending as a guest speaker slash industry professional. Dear GAWD, I'm getting nervous. I don't know why... as I'm just going to be saying to a group the same things I say in my column each week or to actor type friends of mine about the business-end of the industry... I guess it's just that whole "something new" thing. I know I can do it, just have to go do it.

After the open house, we'll go feed Cleo the Wonder Cat and Woody the Cockatiel (these are Rose's parents' animals, and they are all up north at a wedding). After we do the feeding and litter box scooping, we'll call D to see if she wants company. D is my friend who had the double mastectomy last week (why I haven't been Blogging--been playing Nurse Bonnie) and she got her pathology report yesterday. More cancer. More surgery. Definite chemotherapy. If anyone has information on how we could get her hair made into a wig, please let me know. So far, I'm only finding info on how she can donate her hair to Locks of Love for kids. Also, a sad tidbit: it takes ten heads of hair to make one wig, so she can't really get a wig made out of her own hair only. Anyway, coming on the heels of having lost Mom to cancer, this is a pretty emotional experience.

But, I am encouraged by the happy feelings I get when I read the SpyNotebook blogs. There is just something so right with the world that is inhabited by Chip and his technology.
--
Bon
Barry's book

Psychoism: Interim general manager Dave Wallace has made it clear that he doesn't want the job, but will stay in the position for as long as it takes for them to find an actual qualified replacement. Just one step on the way to making things right with the world. [Rose, on The Psycho Ward, 4/19/01]

Posted by bonnie at 12:11 PM

February 15, 2002

Postage Due

I'm going to start right off by saying that I have no idea whether these things exist in places other than LA and New York, but I'm writing about them anyway because they rock my frickin' world.

Postcard racks.

Have you seen these things? I remember the first one I spied. I was on vacation from UGA (combined with a radio conference for WUOG) in New York. This was August of 1996, just after the Olympic Games. I remember that because my hair was short and blonde, which was how I'd worn it for my job as Technology Coordinator at the Olympic Soccer Stadium. Not that this has anything to do with anything -- it's just how I remember when things happen.

I was eating with our music director at a cool dive in the Village with a sidewalk elevator/lift thingy outside the window. Dew Drop Inn was the place. On the wall between the restroom doors, there was this rack of postcards. Twenty different kinds of postcards and about 100 of each kind, in handy little slots.

I wondered if I could nab a few of these postcards and send them home to friends, bragging about stealing postcards during my first trip to New York in 20 years (and that previous trip was before I'd think about writing postcards home, I'm sure). Then I saw the statement, "Free Cards Brought to you by... blah blah blah." No idea what the "blah blah blah" was, now, because I was enchanted by the words Free Cards.

New York was my new favorite place to shop for stationery.

And then, one summer later, when I visited LA... holy shit... postcard racks. In every restaurant.

That may just be why I moved here. I can't recall.

See, postcards are cheap to mail. I think we're at 21 cents postage on a postcard these days, and that's about what I remember letters going for, back when I was a kid with pen pals all over the country (and Canada, eh, but those hosers required extra postage, so I didn't write to them as often). And I can just about say everything I'd need to say to catch someone up on my life in the space of a postcard.

Yeah, I know... hard to believe... but trust me, if I have more than a postcard's worth to say, I just scrawl my URL and make people drive up my hit counter.

I'm realizing that I write a lot about writing. How does that phrase go? "I write, therefore I... write?" Yeah, that seems about accurate.

Okay, where was I?

See, I have this whole OCD-organizational fetish thing going on. So, I can't just pick up postcards. I have to categorize them when I get home with them. Yes, it's true. I have an entire box filled with blank postcards, free from these racks, all in some sort of systematic filing strata, the evidence of years of accumulation.

I could write a postcard a day to every person in my address book for the rest of my life and never run out of postcards.

This can't be healthy.

Posted by bonnie at 1:44 PM

February 5, 2002

Courtney, m'love!

Thank you for loving my Blogs.

Renee had a baby (Ella) in late March (maybe the 30th??) of last year and she's gone from being a punk rock botanist to being a really cool mom. I miss her! Keith and I looked into renting her house, but it's in Pasadena, and that's a bit far out for us. Keith rides his bike everywhere (in LA! Shock!) so proximity to all things was important in our decision. Anyway, Renee works with me at the publishing company (most of my coworkers are out of state -- God bless the Internet). The first pillow I ever crafted was a gift for Ella. Hmm... maybe I'll put it up here.

Renee sent that out via email with a note saying, "Bonnie made this (the pillow, not the baby)." Made me laugh!

Okay... panic attacks over. Thank goodness. Why am I up at this hour? No idea. Tried to sleep. Nope. So, I'm emailing with my friend Barry (who will perform the wedding... I used to say "who will marry us" but that sounds weird.... especially since Bar lived in Utah for a while). His new book is POD with Book Locker and I am SO proud of him. It's a collection of essays and one of them is the one he wrote to me the day Mom died. It is so sweet. Anyway, he's special.

That's it for now, fellow Spies. Oh, wait! Spy-wise, I saw Edward Burns last week at the coffee shop. I think that's it for sightings. Hard to see celebs when you can't leave the house. Moving past that, now, so there should be some spy activity to report here before too long. XXOO, all.

Posted by bonnie at 12:58 AM

February 3, 2002

Dera - I hardly watch ER anymore. Dr. Weaver, though, does direct quite a few of the episodes now, so I'd think (I'd hope) she'd have some ability to direct the theme of her character. I have heard the whole show has gone down in the past couple of years. Did Dr. Benton really leave? And is it good to have Susan back?

I cannot explain anything Britney Spears-related. Chip is your guy for that, I'd gamble.

Shelley - try drinking while watching Leaving Las Vegas. That'll do the trick!

Still watching the PopStars2 marathon... will switch soon to Alias, if that's on tonight (need to check... I think we missed one episode during Sundance... SO addicted to that show), and then go to The IT Factor on Bravo during commercials (we missed the first 1/2 hour at 6pm today).

Has anyone else become addicted to Cheaters? It's the worst bad TV ever... and I love it!

Posted by bonnie at 8:29 PM | Comments (0)

Hi! I'm reading "An Invisible Sign of My Own," by Aimee Bender. She's the author who did the collection of short stories called "Girl in the Flammable Skirt," which was really well-received. I'm only through the prologue and chapter one right now, but I love the main character (a 20-year-old woman with OCD who uses the beauty of numbers and mathematical formulas to keep herself sane).

I also just bough "Micro Fiction," a collection of short shorts; "The Freedom Writer's Diary," about students writing to change their world; "How to be an Adult," by David Richo; "An Unquiet Mind," about a woman's journey with manic depression (yes, you are detecting a theme here); and "Feng Shui for Dummies," which I hope will make all the other self-help books I bought useless in my world.

Ha ha!

Posted by bonnie at 8:17 PM | Comments (0)

Mike

I'm so jealous. I want guacamole and salsa and chili and tortilla chips. I just had a can of soup and some saltines. So underwhelmingly yummy.

Out here, we call that tea stuff Bo-Bo Ball Tea. It was really popular last summer among some coworkers at the publishing company. I could never get into it. Too weird, that combination of textures.

BTW, after having Chick-fil-A lemonade yesterday, water is too bland. I want everything so sweet a spoon stands up in a glass of it.

Posted by bonnie at 5:27 PM

Amy

Go here to locate your Chick-fil-A. I'm sure there's gotta be something within road trip range. Of course, you could do like me (before I found the Redondo Beach Chick-fil-A) and request, every time someone flies in from ATL, that they hit the Dwarf House and pick up a Chick-fil-A, a Dwarf Burger, and a fried apple pie.

It's a small favor, but always appreciated by this Hotlanta native. Hope this helps.

BTW, I am in Day Two of panic attacks. Any advice?

Posted by bonnie at 5:24 PM

February 2, 2002

Blogger Beware...

Okay, I'm composing this one in another program, only to paste it in at Blogger... just in case.

Let me start by commenting on Blogs I've read and then I'll tell you about my past couple of days, days ahead, and other such stuff.

Sara: thank you for the Yeast Gravy recipe. I have given the recipe to the chef (read: fiancé) and hopefully we shall enjoy some yummy potatoes and Grit-style gravy very soon. I can't wait! Keith's recipe for dinner tonight: English Muffin Mini-Pizzas and Caesar Salad. Yummy!

Jocelyn: you have made my day with the Where Are They Now on Scott from 90210. As you may or may not know, my Debt Pop Culture Category (yes, from the short-lived but brilliant Lifetime game show starring Wink Martindale -- when, oh when will this show make it to The Game Show Network?? I mean, you're whipping us with Greed... can't you share the love?) is Beverly Hills, 90210, The Brenda Years. Well, when I was at Sundance (oh, and we just got the photos back, so Keith's scanning those in right now and I'll share a link after I get them uploaded, for your perusing pleasure), I worked with a guy who claims to be unbeatable at 90210 trivia. Pff! So, we've been emailing back and forth and he's stumped me once so far and I've stumped him three times (ha!). Anyway, this is a nice little thing for me to share with him (and, of course, I mean "rub in his face"). So, thank you!

Oh, and I think the people who yell on Milledge have no lives and they just wish they could be as cool as those who dwell in homes on Milledge Ave. Oh, and yes, yell back. But act like you're just doing it for fun. That'll learn 'em.

Dera: yay! So glad you're Blogging too! It really is an Athens Academy reunion! Happy b'day to your aunt! That's so cool! Your comments about neurotic pets remind me of what a neurotic pet-owner I am (Chip can concur. When he babysat my cat for a week while I was out of town, I wrote up a three page instruction manual on the care and feeding of my 17-year-old baby. Yes, I was teased mercilessly for having written such a thing, but I would've been a bad Mommy, had I not done so). I take care of pets here in LA when rich folk go out of town and I have learned that I am nowhere NEAR as neurotic in writing my pet-care manuals as these folks can be. Anyway, your story just reminded me that pets are nowhere near as neurotic as their owners... at least in my experience.

Chipperoonie, my love: you are a cornucopia of Academy kid contact! I'm so jealous! I think you had my ideal day: hanging with kids, doing technology, watching Bev9, and eating at the T-stand. If anyone can score a recipe book of my T-stand faves, I will be way happy. BTW, no one in Cali has even HEARD of Queso Dip and that right there is just sad! Speaking of sad... the end of the Evil Monkey era. Sniffle.

Shelley: I don't even know what an Xtracycle is, but you are my hero for being so fit. I didn't even walk to the market today. I drove. I did walk to the coffee house yesterday for tea with ReBecca and then walked, again, to the same strip of shops for dinner at Birds last night... but the market is something I wouldn't come back from either buzzed from caffeine or cider, so no walk there. Pff! Anyway, I'm still impressed with you. Fitness is a good goal. For everyone but me.

Courtney: I love you! Okay, I have a friend I made out here who is originally from Ohio and has now moved to Virginia who could be your twin in about a zillion different ways. I knew today, when I saw the photo you posted in the What We're Looking At Blog (no, Chip, my feelings aren't hurt at not being invited to any of those cool Theme Blogs), that I had to ask if you are, in fact Renee Burkhammer. Are you? Have you been fooling me all this time?

Oh, I loved your Scientology story. Too funny! And I am SO composing this elsewhere and pasting it in. Damn that Blog for stealing my brilliance. Oh, but Ev did write me back right away. What a cool guy!

Big Mike: thank you for the cookie advice! I got rid of the cookie that was stored and went back through the process... happy me! The new cookie is a happy cookie! I'm in! To stay! Yay!

Okay... what was today like? Uh... I had a gigantic panic attack today which was totally unfun, but I got through it and realized I was in desperate need of pantothenic acid. We'll see if that helps. So far, I'm still shaking. I hate that. I so thought I was done with panic attacks in my early 20s. Pff. This stuff bites! Anyway, post-panic attack, we drove to Redondo Beach, home of the closest Chick-fil-A to us. I became quite happy. The lemonade was even authentic. So so so happy: me! I also learned that Donna Karan Chaos is no longer made due to the fact that her dead hubby designed the fragrance for her. Of course I would buy it before he kicked it and fall in love with the fragrance and not be able to buy it ever again. Drat!

What else... oh, came home and Keith wanted to teach me how to ride my bike but I'm still to frightened of breaking a bone or two, so we'll do that another day. Instead, gave him a pedicure and made him watch Get Shorty, which he'd never seen. He got his new headshots in the mail today, which was very exciting. Next, they'll go to ABC Pictures for typesetting and litho printing. Man, I'm so glad I've retired from acting. Oh, yes, Chip, I think it's The Chamber that got cancelled. The Chair is definitely shooting next week and then taking a short hiatus (yeah, we'll see).

Yesterday was coffee with ReB, who is secretly married (Canadian) and now getting officially married. We had all sorts of "how to get married dirt cheap" talks. There are some pretty decent ideas for that, even in this godforsaken town.

Okay, I am now having a huge debate with the fiancé over pixel vs. inches and putting his headshot up on the website... blah blah blah. Y'know... it's fine for the boy to have his technology, but he shouldn't be allowed to debate about its uses.

About to watch Cops... our Saturday night ritual. Yes, I'm looking for family members. So is Keith. Made for each other, or what?! See, Chip, your family was just too law-abiding for me. Going to the club tomorrow for lunch? If so, tell them all I said hello and I love them muchlee. XXOO, Bloggers. Perhaps more later tonight. If not, I'll post again Monday (car's going into the shop for brakes, so I'll be house-bound). 'Bye.
--
Bon

My epiphany of the night: I live my life like an interviewer on the red carpet. I'm listening to you. I'm asking (somewhat) intelligent questions. I'm right there with you. But I'm constantly looking just over your shoulder, in case someone better is coming up the path. Now, that's deep. [from Dead Laszlo's Oscar Wrap Edition, 2001]

Posted by bonnie at 8:00 PM

January 31, 2002

Okay, the brilliance...

was something like this:

Chip - the Chiplist entered my life at a time when I couldn't handle that kind of volume. Hell, I couldn't even get out of bed. Do this: go to Somesuch-Whatnot using the webbased option and only read my posts, they're the only ones that matter. That'll get you all set for the volume.

Yes, I'm completely jealous that you got to hang out with our kids. I am terribly nostalgic.

Yes, you need at least two rooms, as the bathroom is no good place for a self-respecting comic book collection. You will only find a place like that in your price range if you buy a building downtown and rent to yourself. It's just too prime, that real estate.

Why why why why cannot Blogger recognize that I want to stay logged in and what the eff is that box for that says "remember me" if it's just false advertising anyway? But I'm pouting at Blogger until they give me back that 1/2 hour I spent being brilliant.

You can buy my fiancé a gift certificate if it's something that will help lower his heartrate if he gets cast on The Chair. We need that $200k. BTW, if anyone wants to buy a house in Grand Rapids, MI, that's totally cyber-ready and on an 18-hole golf course, be sure to let me know.

Susan - I am sorry I referred to your Bennie as if he were Tina's Bennie. It won't happen again. Oh, and 90210 dreams are so not lame! FX has been my friend these past two days, as Brenda has been arrested for breaking into the animal lab and freeing the captive cats. Wow. That's some major acting.

Trevor - Happy birthday, Sunday! 28, eh? Enjoy! And yes, I so totally know the joy that is more RAM for the iBook. Pep, pep, pep... but be careful if/when you decide to change out for a larger hard drive. Keith snapped the track pad's cable when he removed the faceplate. Dammit. Does anyone know anyone who can get me a new faceplate for my tangerine baby? Sniffle.

Today... long day. Went to the paper and picked up checks for three columns, then to Sundance for a little post-festival archive work. Spent the rest of the day doing emails. A gazillion. Here's a little-known fact, BTW: When you send out your Year-End Thoughts to your friends and family (or, say, 500 contacts in your address book), approximately 10% of those people will follow the link to the page and read the words that indicate you are engaged. When you send out an email to friends and family asking them to check out a dear friend's new book (and casually mention that said friend will be conducting your previously-revealed wedding), 95% of the recipients will email back saying, "What?! You're engaged?! Tell me everything!" And, having OCD, you (read: me) will answer each and every email personally.

That's all I have. I am beaten down by the whip that is the login timeout of Blogger. Console me, someone.

Posted by bonnie at 9:51 PM

Resolute

Okay. I am the most thoughtful friend on the planet.

If your birthday is in January.

See, every year, I promise myself (since I don't make resolutions) that I will stay on top of my correspondence, beginning with remembering my friends' birthdays. So, if your birthday is in January and I know about it, you will receive a card from me.

Pretty sad that none of my other friends will ever know this side of me, as they may or may not receive acknowledgment of their birth.

I'm glad that, with email greeting cards, I can set up birthday cards to go out on a certain date. Maybe now, I can just try to visit the greetings sites at the beginning of each month or something, and get all of my cards done at once. Hmm, that's a good goal. Still, I know folks like receiving cards in the mail. I do.

I also drink more water in January. Another of those pledges to myself... a gallon a day! This year, I was in Utah for most of January. The Park City altitude really did a number on my body, so it's a dang good thing I was over-doing the water intake. I've been told that most of the water I drank left my body via my mouth as I breathed. Damn. All that work for nothing.

Now I'm back in LA and peeing a lot.

I suppose that can't be bad.

Oh! I've got it! I'll start bringing a stack of birthday cards and postage to the bathroom. That way, I can use the extra time on the can to keep up with those birthday cards all year 'round.

Better hope I have your email address!

Posted by bonnie at 1:46 PM

January 30, 2002

For the love of God

Andy, you are one GMF. Thank you so much for the link to Hill Street Press. I love them. Now I need a $100 gift certificate over there!

Chip... this was the closest template to Hello Kitty I could come up with over here on the still-won't-let-me-stay-logged-in Blogger.

Chip... will you EVER post on somesuch-whatnot? They love you there! You have dirt on me!

Chip... why did you buy my fiancé a gift certificate? He's shooting an episode of Six Feet Under right now, BTW.

I'm watching the whip that is That '80s Show. WHAT were they thinking?! Ugh.

I'm out.

Posted by bonnie at 8:26 PM

Rant

1. I keep telling Blogger.com to remember me, but I keep having to log in. What's up with that.
2. I want a Grit Cookbook.
3. I got my Amazon.com order today. $100 gift certificate from daddy, so I got eight books and one DVD for $15.59. I am happy.
4. No wine. Pear cider.
5. Psycho kitties are killing each other over a satin ribbon.

Posted by bonnie at 5:57 PM

Okay

Okay, so here's what ELSE I learned about Blogging... Sara (no H) wrote to welcome me too! Love those Mason Sisters!

Pacific Coast Crew rules! Did you hear about our series of earthquakes? Tons o' fun!

I guess I casually mention Sundance because it's one of my jobs. I work in the LA office of the Sundance Institute, so to me, it was just making a business trip. But, it's also very cool... and I'd be lying if I said I was "SO over those celeb-sightings" and all that. Tee hee.

My favorite films were a short called "I Lost 20 lbs. in Two Months... Ask Me How" (non-info available... drumroll, I'm going to insert some HTML here... here), "One Hour Photo" (others were unable to see Robin Williams as anything other than Robin Williams but I totally bought his creepy character and really liked this non-violent (but essentially violent) suspense thriller), "Human Nature" (a really funny low-brow comedy with Tim Robbins, Patricia Arquette, and Rhys Ifans), and "The Kid Stays in the Picture" (documentary from Bob Evans' same-titled autobiography).

I also saw Frank Whaley's "The Jimmy Show" but didn't like it because it was SO sad. Ethan Hawke was good in it, though.

I guess, really, my biggest complaint about Sundance is that the festival was so much more corporate and high-financed than I'd anticipated. I couldn't say I saw any film (other than shorts) made for under $2M and in my book, that ain't an indie film! I'm working on a short for next year (submitting under a pseudonym, of course) spoofing the whole film fest culture. It really is a laughable experience.

Parker Posey was snooty, but not in an "I'm too good" sort of way. She just seemed busy and important (sadly, I'm getting used to that attitude being considered the norm, living in LA this long). She was wearing a floor-length fur coat, and that really pissed me off.

Oh, and I agree with you, that Chip's new plate should be HIPPER with a little C sticker in front. I still want to see a pic of this car thing.

Okay... now I'm done. Gotta call casting directors to set up interviews for Friday.

Ooops -- One last thing -- Keith just got back from his audition for The Chair and they told the group that he was the first auditionee to score 100% on the written exam. They wouldn't tell him what his heartrate was, though. Bastids.

Okay, 'bye.

Posted by bonnie at 3:46 PM

Here's what I learned about Blogging

I Blog... then I go read other Blogs... and see that Tina wants to know about her boyfriend, one Benicio del Toro, whom I mentioned in my first real Blog.

So, yay! Here goes Blog #2 from LA.

Benicio... yummy. What a cool guy! He was the honoree for the Piper Heidseck Independent Vision Award at this year's Sundance. The event took place during my shift at my venue (woo hoo). So, I was told that, while I'd see celebs, I'd not be able to attend the event or anything like that.

Well... turns out, they had empty seats at showtime, and didn't want to offend Bennie (as he's called) by not filling the house, so I got to sit... just behind Sir Bennie.

He was introduced, and came down the aisle, all humble and blushing and waving at the crowd. His hair has a lot more grey to it than I'd expected to see, and I don't know if that's for a role or just the way it is. He is VERY handsome.

Kevin Pollack hosted the roast, which really is what it was, and cued the retrospective clips from Bennie's work. The editing was brilliant, with questions he'd posed in some roles being answered by lines delivered in other roles. Very clever. And touching. He is an amazing actor, and it was incredibly touching to see a collection of his work in one place like that... and with him. He was embarassed and soft-spoken, when brought to the stage.

He accepted his award and then sat with Christopher McQuarrie, in the style of Inside the Actor's Studio on Bravo. The Q&A was great. His observations on acting as a profession and its place in the big scheme of things proved that he's a smart guy with a real grip on what's important. He honored his parents, who'd come for the ceremony, and also spoke about every character he'd ever played with respect for the writer who created that reality.

Very cool guy.

And hot. Don't forget hot.

But you knew that.

I should have my photos back, scanned, and up on my website by next week (no, I didn't take the digital camera to SLC... too risky).

Okay, 'bye (oh, I'm wearing my Nurse Bonnie Hello Kitty scrubs today).

Posted by bonnie at 3:20 PM

January 29, 2002

Okay

Okay, so here's my first real blog (real = I think I'm doing it right and I'm not just testing to see if this works).

I'm on my newly covered sofa (thank you Surefit.com [do I need to throw some HTML around that or does Blogger just make a link?] still sipping Nyquil, as it's the only thing I can stomach other than water right now.

Got the whole post-Sundance flu thing. I thought it was just the whole change in altitude, weather, and coming home from having been working so hard for two weeks, but I now think I actually caught something yucky.

Here's who I've spied in 2002 (details provided upon request): Reese Witherspoon, John Claude van Damme, Dennis Woodruff, Ray Liotta, Jason Patric, Christina Ricci, Jennifer Anniston, Kevin Pollack, Benicio del Toro, Kelli Williamson, Kyra Sedgwick, Christopher McQuarrie, Mike Ovitz, Robin Williams, Parker Posey, Juliette Lewis, Gena Rowlands, James Cromwell, Fairuza Balk, Josh Brolin, Frank Whaley, Patrick Stewart, and Uncle Bob Redford.

So far, so good.

Okay. Now what?

Posted by bonnie at 10:54 AM

November 22, 2001

Gobble Gobble

Once upon a time, I was a vegetarian. I'm not sure why. Oh, wait, I remember. I'd had my wisdom teeth extracted and I ended up not eating for the entire summer I turned 15. I got blissfully anorexic. When I started eating again, I never added meat back in.

Well, not never. I think I went about three years without eating meat. I ate seafood, since that didn't walk around or get milked or anything, but I was a pretty dang good vegetarian, I think.

No one ever really noticed that I didn't eat turkey at Thanksgiving. I'd eat dressing and gravy, so why should anyone expect that I had a little wedge of white meat hidden under my cranberry sauce? I guess I wasn't a great vegetarian after all. There's turkey broth in the gravy, right?

Oh well.

My most traumatic Thanksgiving dinner took place in Calabassas, California, in 1993. I was away from home for the first Thanksgiving of my young life. My boss, a musical artist manager, fancied himself my LA-based father figure, and called my mother to tell her I'd be having a traditional Thanksgiving dinner at his home.

I asked if I could bring anything, as good southern girls do, and was told just to bring myself; his wife would have everything prepared. Truth be told, his wife was more of a supervisor in that kitchen; directing traffic made up of four non-English-speaking employees. I chose to hang out in the study with my boss, a record label exec, and Meat Loaf's business manager. I had more in common with them, somehow.

Dinner is served. Why are there raisins and walnuts in my cranberry sauce? How is oyster stuffing considered a complementary dressing for turkey? And where are the mashed potatoes? Where is the candied marshmallow glaze across the sweet potatoes? Where is all the beloved Thanksgiving starch? And why are we drinking wine? I'm expecting iced tea so sweet a spoon stands up in the glass.

I miss home.

Give me over-cooked green beans, five different casserole dishes, and cranberry sauce with rings on it, fresh from the can. Then, I'll be able to pass out after Thanksgiving dinner like every other loyal American former vegetarian: properly stuffed, in front of the television, hoping to be woken up for pecan pie, pumpkin pie, and banana pudding with Nilla Wafers.

Tiramisu is for communists.

Posted by bonnie at 1:47 PM

November 8, 2001

My New Favorite TV Show

I am not even going to begin to be disturbed by the fact that my columns make it seem as though I value TV above any human social interaction. That's not productive behavior (though it may be something worth being disturbed over... later).

A month ago, having given up on "Saturday Night Live" just after the "Weekend Update" segment, I flipped through my non-cable TV choices and came across a new show, syndicated, begging to be watched (by me, anyway), "Cheaters."

One segment and I was forever hooked. "Cheaters" has become my heroin. If you are in my house at 11:55pm Saturday, you will be prepped for the upcoming hour in a, "Get ready or leave now," speech of sorts. I am not interested in what you think about the show, nor what you think it says about me that I love this show. I just want you to hold all commentary until the commercial breaks. Of course, gasps and exclamations of, "Oh my gawd!" are expected and encouraged.

"Cheaters" encourages viewers to contact their office in Dallas. From Cheaters.com: "Thank you for considering "Cheaters'" licensed detectives to assist you with your matter. "Cheaters" wishes only the best outcome for you." This is what's so amazing about this show (and its propaganda): while viewers are watching unfaithful spouses with unknowing (or oblivious) boy toys or bimbos, producers are selling the premise as a service to the "Client" who has "hired" them (of course, there is no charge for the tailing, recording, and confronting of the "Suspect"... just the right to broadcast it).

"Exercise your right to know the truth," is the tagline to a commercial break. While host Tony Grand (a pseudonym), all tan and dressed in black like some reject from a Johnny Cash/George Hamilton Revue in Vegas, hugs a "Client," he shows her a video montage of her beloved engaging in non-monogamous behavior (my favorite clip included the hubby tossing a used condom from a car window after having gotten frisky with the couple's roommate... who is also the "Client's" sister). She falls into the host's arms, weeping uncontrollably.

What do you know? The "Suspect" and his mistress are together right now, engaging in vehicular sex, yet again (lots of sex-in-cars on this show, by the way). "Yes, Sarah, it's true. We have them under surveillance in a parking lot near his workplace. They are currently engaging in sexual activity... in your car." Sarah gasps as the camera closes in for a more dramatic shot. "Do you want to confront them now?" Suddenly, with the realization that the infidelity is in her Infiniti, Sarah's tears dry up and she gets furious, wailing, "You bet your ass I do!"

And this is just in the first 15 minutes of this hour-long schlock-fest!! Oh, yes... we get two cases, plus follow-up interviews with "Suspects" from previous shows; a sort of "Where Are They Now" report on whether or not couples tried to work through the cheating issue.

Here's where it gets really good: every couple tries to work it out, gets into rehab, or comes back to speak to "Cheaters'" producers (on-camera, of course), meaning that the show has committed a public service.

This is considered healing Television. You've got it... all of that drama is just a set-up for the self-righteous, scared-straight line of BS that comes at the end of the show. We all leave the show filled with warm fuzzies and the satisfied glow of knowing that we can work through the trauma of our personal lives.

This is exactly what the world needs: hope that a little hidden-camera action and a production crew-slash-posse can heal the world... one couple at a time.

Posted by bonnie at 1:48 PM

October 18, 2001

October

I love October. I'm not sure why. I can't remember ever not liking October, so I'm guessing I was conceived in October and that's why I dig the month so much.

But there are other reasons too.

October is when it turns cold. Well, at least in places that have seasons. In LA, I guess it turns cold in October too, but it's not the same thing. Back East, I could always count on bundling up to leave the house on crisp October mornings. "Dress in layers," my roommate would remind me. Yes, of course, since it'll be warmer in the afternoon at some point. Layers are good. A little tank top, a mock-turtleneck shirt, a sweater (cardigans are good). Yes. That's good. Even the ex-boyfriend's leather jacket to top it all off. Hmm. Cold is good.

Too cold is not good, though. I'm a weather wimp. I hate extreme temperatures. I'll complain when it's warmer than 82°F in the summer, and bitch like Hell when the temperature drops below 50 ever. That is why I live in Los Angeles. It is a haven for weather wimps.

October is when we go back to Standard Time, which I appreciate. I don't really like the whole Daylight Savings Time premise. I think it's so cool that there are places in the world that completely ignore this tradition (and let's face it, if it's not mandatory, it's just a tradition) and laugh about our little clock-changing ritual. Since I don't keep "regular hours" of any sort, I have no issue with the number of hours of daylight. Daylight is overrated. Well... except when I'm deprived of it. I have that thing where I get more depressed in the winter time just because of the lack of sunlight. Hell, I don't care if it's a real "condition" or not, but it allows me to have an "out" for eating extra chocolate and nesting in January.

"October" is the title of a song by the band The Disciples. This is a band that spawned other bands you may have heard of (Black Crowes, Butthole Surfers, Drivin' and Cryin'). This band won Battle of the Bands at North Springs High School in 1986 and their prize was the pressing of a single. The B side of "Can't Live Without You" is "October" and I, being the non-mainstream type that I am, always preferred that B-side non-hit.

October is when the leaves match my hair color. Well, at least the leaves in Boston. I remember going to Quincy Market in October for several years in a row and marveling over the breeze, the smell, the chill, and the colors of the leaves. I miss that. Palm trees don't change color (except when the fronds are dead and fall off onto your car).

October is when Braves Fever really sets in. I have been a Braves fan since I was a kid. I even loved the Braves when they were the worst in the league. That's when we could get the best seats at the stadium (for $4). But when the Braves went from Worst to First in one season... oh, man, that was an October I will never forget. All of the professors at UGA were willing to forgive us delays in turning in assignments, as we were all up so late watching the Braves spank the Dodgers in stupid pacific time. Oops... I live in LA now, I'd better reel that in. Oh wait, I live in LA. No one here cares about sports. Duh!

October 31st is Halloween. That's my favorite holiday. I love dressing up. I love taking kids trick-or-treating and pretending that I'm doing it for them. I love entering contests at bars and winning Best Conceptual Costume (because I'm never literal). I love haunted houses and Halloween parties and masquerades of any kind. That's a big contributing factor to my love of October, I'm sure. Freshman year at UGA, one of my dorm mates noticed that we had a Friday the 13th that October. She pondered, "Wouldn't it be scary if one year Halloween fell on a Friday 13th?" She was serious. If Reed Hall was "Friends," this girl was "Joey."

October is when I start to feel energy shift. It's like the end of the year is coming and October is our last chance to make something of the year before the stupid holidays rush in and keep us from being productive (or even sane). I feel all the potential of the new year ahead in October. Maybe that's why New Year's Eve and New Year's Day have never meant a dang thing to me.

I'm over here with my magnum of champagne and pointy hat in the eighth-tenth month of the year!

Posted by bonnie at 1:49 PM

September 20, 2001

My Favorite Sport

As football season begins and Psycho sports wood, I began to reflect on my favorite sport: the High Speed Chase.

There was a time when I just thought I enjoyed the thrill of watching, from the comfort of my living room, the helicopter view of the inevitable end to some guy's wild ride. Then it hit me: in a city where sports fans are more fickle than teenage girls, we DO, in fact, have our own Official Sport. It is, most definitely, the High Speed Chase.

I mean, look at the parallels: sports fans of the more, shall we say, traditional nature, know the stats of every player on every team. Okay. I used to teach traffic school for the Improv Comedy Club, so I know the point violation and accompanying fine associated with each bold maneuver my car chase dude executes.

Sports fans cannot be interrupted when their sporting events come on TV. All right, just try to distract me while a car chase is on.

Football fans can predict which team will win, and by how much, but they still choose to watch the game as it unfolds, cheering and screaming at their TV sets. Me too. I know the cop will win. He always does. Whether the guy being chased has stolen the car, tossed drugs from the window, hit unknowing cross-traffic during his chase, or started running just to avoid that damn third strike, he will, unquestionably, be caught. Will it be a spike strip that flattens his tires? Will it be a PIT maneuver that ends the chase? Will his family and friends rush the street as he drives through his own neighborhood? Will he try to flee on foot after the car chase itself ends? All of those variables make my sport of choice exciting, and just the same as my football fan friends, I watch from the edge of my seat.

Now, I don't know much about football commentary. I personally prefer NBA basketball and Major League Baseball, when it comes to watching sporting events. But, I'll assume, for the sake of this comparison, that football announcers are just as annoying, with their attempts at humor and droll observations of the, well, obvious, as my favorite newscasters are in covering the play-by-play of a Car Chase. These pretty idiots chime in with their, "Oooh! He narrowly missed that pedestrian!" and "We're not sure what started this chase, buy since we've joined the pursuit, we've seen erratic behavior on the part of the suspect as he drives, sometimes on the wrong side of the street."

Last week, one of my heroes on KCAL-9 made the comment that the Geo Metro being pursued was, "the type of car you want in this situation, as its fuel efficiency will keep you on the road for hours longer than some other cars." Oh my God. Did this woman just recommend a car for use in High Speed Chases? Well, I guess it's no different than Howie Long hawking Radio Shack products. And there was that weekend that sales on Range Rovers skyrocketed in the LA area after one in a High Speed Chase survived three popped tires and an off-road pursuit better than any other car in recent Car Chase history.

Anyway, I realized that the only thing different about my favorite sport is the fact that I can't look at TV Guide to know when it will air. What I can do, however, is listen for choppers overhead. If they are hovering in small circles, I know what's going on, and I head for the remote! Of course, I could sign up for the service that pages you when a High Speed Chase is on in your area, but I don't think they notify you quickly enough. Still, I may try it. It's never as much fun watching the highlights on the evening news as it is watching the sport live! Now, if I could just find a way to buy tickets to ride in that helicopter....

Posted by bonnie at 1:52 PM

September 3, 2001

Amagi Was Cool!

Thanks for coming!

Finally got the beau to LAX this morning (5am... yawn!) and now can get back to life for a minute.

Thank you to everyone who participated in Official Check Out the Boyfriend activities this past week. It was a blast!

Posted by bonnie at 1:31 PM

August 30, 2001

Tune In, Drink Up?

Okay, so I'm watching a rerun of "Friends." It's the one with Susan Sarandon and she's some hoity-toity soap star teaching Joey how to take over her role on "Days of Our Lives" -- which is, of course, not shot in New York, where "Friends" is set, but that's okay, since "Friends" is also not shot in New York. Whatever. That's not what this is about.

So, this soap character is famous for two things: slapping her costars and throwing drinks in their faces.

Now, I've seen "Friends" enough to know that these characters drink coffee. Lots and lots of coffee -- and usually only when they're at Central Perk. In this particular episode, the gang has inexplicably switched to water -- and everyone has a nice tall glass of it while hanging out at Joey's apartment.

Guess why.

Yup. Susan Sarandon is going to be there after sleeping with Joey (yeah, whatever) one afternoon and every single person in the room will have a glass of water ready for Susan's hydro-tossing needs.

Oh, wait. There was one other episode in which the gang imbibed delicious New York city water: the one with Brook Shields as Joey's love interest. See, she'd seen him on "Days of Our Lives" and started stalking him. Good thing she was gorgeous. They had some sex (yeah, whatever) and when he broke it off with her, sure enough, the entire gang was assembled in his apartment, swilling the clear stuff, just waiting for the opportunity to soak him for sport.

I have no problem with water-drinking or even water-tossing, for that matter. Here's my thing: of course your character is going to get wet. See all that water? Joey, I know you're an idiot, but you could see that coming, right? I mean, there's never ever ever ever ever water unless you're gonna be wearing it.

I hope he understands this.

Whenever I see reruns of "NewsRadio" I want coffee. I don't drink coffee, but these folks rely on it so heavily that I find myself craving the stuff -- which, by the way, was found by Berkeley researchers to contain more carcinogens than a cigarette... ew -- and I don't even own a coffee maker.

When I used to smoke, watching "Reality Bites" made me want to chain smoke. Watching "Chocolat" made me want to binge on chocolate. "Pulp Fiction" made me want to, well... you see where this is going.

It's a good thing I don't have cable. I understand there's a lot of sex there.

Posted by bonnie at 1:54 PM

August 16, 2001

Can an Insomniac Still Dream?

So I have this affliction I've named Summer Insomnia. Every summer since 1990, I've gone as long as ten weeks with no sleep. It started with a migraine. I don't really get migraines anymore, so I think now it's become a psychosomatic habit.

I really thought I'd get through this summer without a visit from the insomnia fairy. Then August 5th hit. Some sort of post-full moon heat wave crashed into the Hollywood Hills and I couldn't get to sleep. "No matter," I thought. "'Tis just one night." Yeah, right.

So... here's what I've learned this time around:

* Oprah comes on twice a day.
* So do Leno & Conan.
* Newspapers are delivered between 3:10am and 3:50am.
* The mailman lady wears shorts.
* My landlady's cat was originally named Adventure, but he never really responded to it. He likes Alphie better.
* The upstairs neighbor's sex life is much less interesting than it was a few months ago.
* My dial-up connection is fastest and most reliable before 5am.
* I eat less food but more frequently when I don't sleep.
* With all these hours, I still procrastinate.
* Every game of Free Cell is, in fact, winable.
* Madame Cleo is on every channel at some point each day.
* I see dead people.
* Unwanted hair removal is a national epidemic.

I'd like to take a moment to express my shock over that last discovery. I guess, as hair goes, I'm bodily bald. I only recently bought tweezers (something about nearing 30), my legs only show the finest blonde pseudo-stubble about five days after shaving, and I've never had to bleach, wax, or otherwise melt or burn hair from my... regions.

So, maybe I just haven't been paying attention. Based on the hours of infomercials I've logged this month, I'd guess that the average woman spends a great deal of time focused on the removal of her unwanted hair.

Wow. I guess I need to be grateful for my pale, Irish-Scottish... uh, roots. I'm sorry, my brunette sisters. I always thought "removal of unwanted hair" meant pulling a stray off of your tongue.

Posted by bonnie at 1:55 PM

August 2, 2001

My Favorite Tool

There are two types of people in this world: those who have the ability to assemble Ikea furniture and those who do not.

Perhaps there are more than those two types, but there are - for certain - those two.

For those whom the word Ikea has no meaning, I'll elaborate. Ikea is the company that furnishes the MTV Real World houses. It's a store whose furniture designs are in the homes of every LA resident I know.

Ikea furniture is packed in boxes. Contents of these boxes include particle-board (pressed potato flakes) slats with holes bored through mid-way; smaller slats with different holes, some bored through all the way; a crisp white sheet of paper with drawings (no words) indicating the box inventory and the state of said inventory, once assembled properly; assorted screws and dowels; and - most essentially - an Allen Wrench. These are the ingredients for ultra-mod furniture of the '90s (and yes, I do mean '90s).

Most of this furniture is inexpensive enough to toss with each move, mainly important because the disassembly/reassembly or transportation of assembled Ikea furniture tends to render the furniture items unusable - or, at the very least, unstable.

Know this: the only tool necessary in assembling Ikea furniture is an Allen Wrench.

I once was asked to assist a client in assembling a computer desk for the computer I'd been hired to integrate into the existing network. When I mentioned that this work would be at my regular consultant rate, the client paid someone else in the office to do it. When I re-entered the room a few hours later, the desk was... well, what my Mom would call "catty-whompus" and none... none of the screw-type items had been used. In fact, the crisp white instruction sheet remained folded neatly in its air-tight plastic wrapping. Turns out the employee had selected a power drill and hammer as the tools of choice in constructing his masterpiece.

I'd always had a "he-rubs-me-the-wrong-way" sort of relationship with this guy and now I knew why. People who know how to assemble Ikea furniture should only be subjected to interactions with others who know what to do with an Allen Wrench. This has become my opening line when meeting Potential Mr. Bonnie Gillespies:

"Finish this sentence. Ikea furniture is best assembled using _____."

Correct answers include the word Allen. Incorrect ones come from other tools.

Posted by bonnie at 1:56 PM

July 19, 2001

Call Me!

There is a shared moment in which we are all out of control. We sit, strapped into our overpriced seats, inside an illogically massive transportation device, and we just let go. We have no choice.

We may control the climate with those efficient and effective fish-eye air holes. We may control the light cast upon our reading material. We may even control what we hear as we escape to the monophonic melodies of some forgettable recording artist.

Can I control whether you'll talk to me, your neighbor at 30,000 feet? Nope. Can I control whether I'll speak English when you do talk to me? You betcha.

No matter how many calls you've made from your cell phone prior to boarding, no matter how many times you've opened your laptop at the gate, there is a moment, corporate wannabe, when you can do nothing but think - not do. Takeoff is the great equalizer.

Yesterday I went for my smog check - or what is called in every other state an emissions inspection. The technician struck up a conversation with me about cell phones - and how he doesn't understand, when he comes to work at 5am, who all these other people on the road are talking to - and why it can't wait until they stop driving. Just then, a cabbie drove up, cell phone firmly attached to ear, and the technician gestured toward him as if to say, "See?"

He told me he'd lived in this country for 13 years and didn't have a cell phone. I quickly did inventory: cell phone, pager, voicemail, palm pilot, laptop, desktop, über-access.

So, I went on cell phone hiatus. I waited patiently at the ARCO station, knowing I could make the ten phone calls in my mental outbox in an hour when I returned home.

Today, as I sit at LAX, awaiting a flight that leaves six hours after the flight on which I was booked, I feel smugly judgmental as each passerby makes an urgent, too-good-for-a-pay-phone call, rather than talking with their travel companions. And, sadly, I realize how much work I could've gotten done, had I my cell phone with me today.

Instead, I've read, I've written, I've talked (with humans right here at the airport with me), I've consolidated my many lists, and I've flirted with a boy way too young for me - but who was just served a beer, so he can't be that young.

Oh, I'd get into much less trouble if I had my cell phone. But would I have enjoyed my day at the Museum of Modern Travel?

Posted by bonnie at 1:57 PM

July 5, 2001

Top 17.4 Ways To Piss Me Off

Why would I want to write an article about the things that piss me off? Aren't I just arming the masses with the best ammo that way? Well, here's my theory: this list already does exist somewhere out there. It must, otherwise people who say they love me - as well as complete strangers - wouldn't keep doing these things. I figure, the list is out there, and its title has been changed to "Things Bonnie Loves, So Keep It Up" or something.

Since you all mean well, I'm sure, I'm going to take this opportunity to show the list, in its entirety, and explain why said items are on the list.

1. Punctuate Incorrectly. Let's get it straight: y'all is a contraction of the words YOU and ALL, not YA and WILL. '70s is the proper shortening of 1970s. See, the apostrophe goes where the 19 once was. Quit writing "Did ya'll see That 70's Show?" or I will have to kill you.

2. Be Anal About the "I Before E" Rule. Remember, there is that part about "except after C" - like in received. Also, it's WEIRD, not WIERD. It just is. Look it up.

3. Pronounce Common Words Incorrectly. It's supposedly -- see the D in there? No B. It's supposedly. I guess I just figure, if it's been a joke on "Friends," everyone should be doing it right by now. Sheesh. Now, one exception to this rule is if you're doing that cool hipster-speak thing like Katy [HorridScope] does. That's effin' coolio, y'know?

4. Be Redundant. Make ATM "ATM Machine." Make PIN "PIN Number." Make SAT "SAT Test." Make HIV "the HIV Virus." For the love of God, people, what do you think the letters in the acronyms stand for?

5. Write in Ricki Lakese. I know it SOUNDS like "would of" but it's "would have." I know it SOUNDS like "alright" but it's "all right." I don't care if you say it wrong, just make sure, when you write it down, you get it right (except in the case of item number three, and then I do care if you say it wrong). Oh, and that reminds me, it's EXCEPT, not ACCEPT, when used like I just did right there. Of course, I reserve the right to change the spelling of words like CRAP to KEY-WRAP and YEA to YAY. I know YEA is correct, but YAY just seems to really capture the mood better.

6. Ask Me if I Know What You Mean. Listen. I'm not an idiot. If I need you to clarify what you just said, I will ask you to do so. You do not need to follow every statement with the question, "Do you know what I mean?" just so I'll nod or respond or somehow interact with you. I'm not ignoring you if I'm silent after you speak. I'm thinking. Well, that or listing all of the grammatical errors you just made.

7. Take Me Personally. See, every time I mention item number six, Joni [of Entertainment News? fame] busts on me for making fun of her. She loves to ask if I know what she means. She's been doing it for twenty years. She's allowed. Now, if she takes number six personally, I'm gonna have to smack her! It's like that Jeff Goldblum sketch in Saturday Night Live with Rob Schneider. Rob's homeless and playing a guitar, yet he yells at Jeff with each donation. "I'm not looking for your pity! I don't need your money!" Then he sings, "This isn't just a song. I really need the money." This is not one of those times, Joni. For everyone else, every one of these items is about you.

8. Create Increments that Don't Exist. When the radio station has a contest and the DJ says he wants the 98.7th caller, I almost drive my car up a building. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS 7/10 OF A CALLER. Yes, I know this article is called Top 17.4 Ways to Piss Me Off... it's a joke. I get it. Item eight also applies to saying things like 110%. Now, you can have an increase of 110% but there is no such thing as "Giving 110%." Coaches, take note.

9. Say "awholenother." This has always bothered me. I understand that certain phrases and terms make their way into everyday conversation and in fact join the ranks of the dictionary listings. Still, when I see a film or TV show in which someone says awholenother, I scream. See, somewhere, in print, there was a script for that scene, and I can't imagine someone actually typing AWHOLENOTHER. In fact, I'm queasy just having typed it three times myself.

10. Take up 2 Parking Spots. I have a tiny car. So, if you take up a spot and a half, I don't really care. I'll fit. But you stupid SUV owners who think you'd better park at an angle to protect your baby from dings, don't be surprised if you find me parked under you. Yeah, that'll show you! Okay, I guess I've got no pull on that one. I'll let it go.

11. Ignore Instructions. I get notices for jobs every day. These are not job lists, but actual friends and associates looking for help doing such and such, and I am too busy right now to take on another new client. What do I do? I forward the email, along with originating sender contact information, to my many friends in search of work. What do they do? Email me, "Oh, Bonnie, this sounds PERFECT for me. Do you want me to attach my resumé? Oh, I think I just will, so that you can review it and tell me when I can interview. Oh, I also have a friend who's interested in that job you emailed me about last week [which frickin' one?]. Could you call her and give her all the details?" Forget a reference, my friend. It's like that test they gave in the third grade about reading all instructions before doing a single item. Last item says, "ignore all other items, sign your name at the top of this page, and turn it in." I think every one of my friends failed that test. Sigh.

12. Forward Urban Myths and Chain Emails. I think I have reached my tolerance level on this one. I used to say to people who complained about forwards, "Hey, you have a delete icon. Use it." Well, now I'm getting pretty antsy. I guess I've been online long enough now to have seen every single thing no fewer than eight times. Tell ya what: Bill Gates sends you that check for $100,000 for forwarding that email to a million people, you give me a call.

13. Make a Stupid Slogan for Your Product. Advertisers, get it straight: there are people out here who really, really, really want to throw something at the TV when you choose to be stupid. Psycho would insist that this includes hiring Blue Man Group as your pitchmen. I would say, a much more egregious fault is advertising tampons, then using the tag line, "So comfortable! You can't even feel them." THEM?!? HOW MANY ARE YOU PUTTING IN? Jesus!

14. Act Shocked When I Answer the Phone. Yes, I never answer the phone. That is true. Well, almost true. Sometimes I do. When I do, should you greet me with, "Oh my God! You answered the phone," from here on out, I pledge to hang up on your ass and block your number forever. End of topic.

15. Say "No Comment." Got a newsflash for ya: "No Comment" is, in fact, a comment.

16. Be Fake. Here's my favorite: you come to me, with your fake nails, your fake tan, your fake boobs, and you ask me, "Do you dye your hair?" Bitch, please! In the interest of full disclosure, I do use a rinse that washes out (so it says on the box) in 24 shampoos. I use that about once every nine months or so, when I feel like my hair looks drab. Last time I did it, I ended up using my exact natural color. Yes, I am brilliant. I know.

17. Take Me Seriously. This is just venting, folks, and, yes, I guess it goes along with item number seven, but get over it. The other day, as I was doing my Nurse Bonnie duties, Dawn asked, "This is going to end up in a column, isn't it?" Yep, it is. It always is. If you're in my life, you're out, baby. So, if you take yourself too seriously to be written about, you'd better let me know that before you do anything interesting in front of me.

I just realized I've become my 10th grade History teacher. He was such a meanie to everyone in class that, on the first day, he asked for anyone who didn't want to be made fun of to slip him a little note on that day, or else he'd consider them fair game for the whole quarter. Hmm... I'm different in a good way, though: I won't make fun of 15-year-olds. Too fragile. See what it did to me?

Posted by bonnie at 1:59 PM

June 7, 2001

Stuff You Can't Get in LA

I'm not from Los Angeles. No one is. Well, Rose is, but she's different. All of the tens of thousands of LA Natives are different. But they don't count. There are all of these Transplant Pseudo-Natives. It is said that, once you've passed the 18-month mark in LA, you have become a native. No thanks.

Of course, I know better than to complain about LA while choosing to make my life here. That habit just invites people to say, "Well, if you hate LA so much, then leave!" I did just that in 1994, but it was also because of the Northridge Quake and my persistent migraines. So why am I back?

Ah, who knows? I'm not into the Big Club Scene. I don't go out of my way to attend swanky premieres or see show tapings, except when someone visits me from out of town. I never go to the beach. I rarely drive with the top down, for that matter. I do have an agent, a cell phone, a pager, a Palm Pilot, a roadster, an "in" at several cool places, and a network of anorexic, surgically-enhanced so-called friends.

My two-digit dress size makes me abnormal out here, at least in certain circles. I believe there are two distinct LAs... maybe more. But for sure, there are two. In one, I am too big, too old, too southern, too intelligent, and too opinionated to be considered average. In the other, I am a goddess. I am self-sufficient, clever, witty, buxom, outspoken, and charming. And where do I spend my time? Begging to be permitted to sit at the Cool Kids' Table in the cafeteria.

Yeah, well... I'm getting over that. I have a whole lot more fun surrounding myself with people who appreciate me for who I am, not for how much money I could earn them, if properly cast, made-up, starved, trained, and packaged. Does this mean I've had some Oprah-worthy epiphany? Nah. Just means I'll let myself off the hook every now and then, when I don't get cast in The Next Big Thing that really is tomorrow's canceled series.

'Til then, I'll continue my quest for the things you really treasure in a place like LA: a patch of lawn, a clear-sky day, a smile from a stranger (and not the kind of smile that makes you want to take a bath), laughter, honesty, Krispy Kreme donuts, Chick-fil-A sandwiches, serious queso dip (which NO ONE out here understands), punctual mail delivery, and sweet iced tea.

Posted by bonnie at 2:00 PM

May 24, 2001

When Did I Get So Old?

I'm not sure when it happened. I can't really pinpoint a particular moment of realizing, "Hmm, this feels harder to do than it did the last time I did it. I must be getting older." No, it was more like, "Why am I so sore? Why am I so tired? Why would I rather go to bed with a good book than that hot guy over there, if it means having to do the work of flirting, catching, cleaning, and cooking the damn thing? Why am I acting 80?!?"

So often, I'm sure I'm still a teenager. Nothing much has changed, in terms of my likes and dislikes. Too much perfume or cologne still pisses me off. Bass thumping so loudly from a car's speakers that the street cracks still annoys me. These aren't new traits of the Grumpy Old Hag I've become. I still firmly believe that weekly massage and chiropractic adjustments could bring about world peace. I still know Robyn Hitchcock is a genius and John Cusack will marry me the instant he meets me. Yep, same beliefs for over 15 years now. And I enjoy a cherry popsickle today as much as I did after playing all day on the Slip-n-Slide in the front yard.

Of course, there's the gradual wrinkle I notice once every few months. I have to pluck and tweeze and things that I never had to as a teenager. My fingernails won't stay long all at the same time and I no longer have the time to paint little portraits on them with acrylic paint. I don't spend hours trimming split ends off my hair. I use moisturizer religiously. It takes much longer to bounce back from illness, a drunken bender, or a fall (and somehow I've gotten much more clumsy these days).

But when did I start making noises when getting into and out of my car? When did I start saying, "Oy," under my breath when getting out of bed? When did I start squinting so often that it feels strange to force relaxation into that spot just above my left eyebrow?

Maybe those things happened just as gradually as the ability to find joy in a familiar song, passion over a new idea, and unconditional love for a dear friend. Perhaps it's just a by-product of the years passing, that my mind - and my body - find pleasure in the simple things. Maybe it's all part of the grand scheme of things and I'm becoming a wise soul. Or, could it be, just possibly, that I'm a lazy old coot who is grumpy and needs a nap? Yeah. That sounds about right. Now get off my yard before I come after you with this cane!

Posted by bonnie at 2:01 PM

May 10, 2001

Pop Culture Challenge

Once I was dining with some of my more literary friends and was interrupted by one of them. "Bonnie," Dawn began, "you've made five TV references in the past ten minutes and, since I don't own a television, I find it difficult to keep up with your analogies."

I was speechless.

First of all, get a TV! Second, if you're gonna be The Freak with No TV, then you should just keep to yourself that you can't keep up with my stories. Third, what's so wrong about using TV to help make a point?

I called my friend Chip, who owns a CyberHouse I covet like you wouldn't believe. "Chip," I whined, "why did I feel like such an outcast after she made that comment?"

Chip proceeded to tell me the tale of his recent weekend getaway with some of our favorite nerdy friends. "Kate decided that we all make too many pop culture references, considering how intelligent we all are."

"That's not the point!" I interrupted.

"I know!" Chip agreed. "But she threw down the Pop Culture Challenge for the weekend." Immediately, I remembered the short-lived Lifetime Television game show, Debt, in which Wink Martindale would reward contestants with a repayment of their life's debt, perhaps even double that reward, based on the contestant's sudden-death turn with their Favorite Pop Culture Category. I remembered seeing several people choke on questions that I knew the answers to, even though the categories weren't ones on my Expert List. I decided, if I ever go on the show, I'd use Beverly Hills, 90210 - The Brenda Years, since I know every word to every episode within that era. See, it's always smarter to use a show rather than a film, since a film is so short, by comparison. The question could be about another film on which the cinematographer of your favorite film worked. Choosing a band is good, but you have to know with what other bands the bassist played or on what label they first recorded. Nah, I had it right: BH9, Brenda Style.

But that's not what Chip meant. Kate's challenge to the group of friends - and this was not to win a debt-free life or anything - was to make no pop culture references for the entire weekend. Ugh! That just sounds painful! And why would anyone do this voluntarily?

I'm constantly adding to the list of shows that will air on My Ideal TV Network. This is actually funny, since now, with TiVo, Replay, and that overpriced Microsux version of the same thing, My Ideal TV Network actually exists. You just tell the darn thing what you want to see and there ya go! Once it airs somewhere, you've nabbed it. Of course, I was thinking more along the lines of programming all the shows that never aired (and never will be run, even after having been shot, due to early cancellation, networks' greed, advertisers -- ah, don't get me started). For instance, I'd have a network of Relativity (that adorable show between Thirty-Something and My So-Called Life); Class of '96 (the quickly-canceled Fox episodic between Bev9 and Melrose Place); of course, Bev9, MP, and other such candy; Partners and any other show created by or starring friends of mine; Freaks & Geeks; Match Game, Pyramid, and other classics from the Game Show Network; The Donny & Marie Variety Hour; Iron Chef; Family Guy (a brilliant cartoon that has disappeared this season); and finally, E! True Hollywood Stories, VH-1 Before They Were Stars and Where Are They Now, A&E Biography, and any other true story thingy.

Oh, man! I can't wait to have TiVo!

Where was I? Oh, yeah. Chip said they were able to rise to Kate's Pop Culture Challenge. "Did you become better people for it?" I asked.

Chip's deadpan response: "It was the worst weekend of my life."

Posted by bonnie at 2:02 PM

April 26, 2001

Boys Are Dorks

Flirting is such a difficult thing. Actually, it's quite simple, but the language is so easily misunderstood. It's like you want to be sure you speak the same version of Flirtage and not some bastardized Esperanto before you invest a minute in what can be an exhausting process. Still, flirting is healthy and it's fun, even when done with someone with whom there's no potential.

For example, flirting with gay guys is the best! They really appreciate the art form, so they play right along, even though there's nary a stir from their nether regions during said flirting. Last night, I had such fun with my new best friend Nelson that he has made a commitment to me. Yep, he's going to introduce me as his girlfriend the next time his dad comes through town. Hey, it's not the first time I've played beard.

In high school, I was certain that I would be the mother of David's children. His sister Faith assures me that I can still do this, just that I'll have to give the kids to David and his husband Mark. Okay, that's not really what I had in mind.

John, my friend of eleven years who has been "out" for seven of those, has told me I am one of only three women for whom he'd "go back" for a night of heterosexuality. I know there's a compliment in there somewhere.

The worst feeling is that moment in which you realize you're flirting with someone who has no interest in you. Not because they're gay, but because you're too fat or too old or too smart or too loud or too similar to their last girlfriend or not the right religion or whatever stupid Jerry Seinfeldian excuse for not being into a woman they choose to come up with. Of course, in Los Angeles, I'm way too frequently conned by the guy who'll flirt, then reveal that he'd prefer fake boobs, fake tan, fake nose, and a stapled stomach to someone with her own curves, her natural alabaster skin tone, original facial parts, and healthy appetite. Oh, gosh, I'm sorry... am I too real for LA? Nine times out of ten, yep! Most of the time, it's a non-native Angelino who finds me interesting. Remember, though, Native = 2 Years or More in LA, so I've gotta get 'em quick! Maybe I can set up a booth at the airport. It works for Moonies, right?

Posted by bonnie at 2:03 PM

April 12, 2001

MOH, I Didn't Even Know You Were an Acronym

On the 4th of March, I went from being Bonnie Gillespie to being Maid of Honor.

My phone rang at 8am--and this was on a Sunday--so you know that hour is obscene. I let the voicemail pick up; I'm sleeping. Fifteen minutes later, another call. Roll over, cover my head with a pillow, and let the caller go to voicemail again. A few hours later, I take a shower and then check the voicemail. It's Sissa.

Sissa is Melissa. She was an exec staff member at the radio station I advised back in grad school. She became my little sister and I became her big sister. It was a slow evolution, our friendship, but one that enriched my life and continues to do so, years later. Once I realized Melissa was becoming my best friend, I began calling her Sissa. In my mind, that's short for Melissa. In her mind, that's slang for Sister, so she calls me Sissa too. I will never, ever correct her on that one. I am honored to be called Sissa by my best friend.

Okay, so I'm checking my voicemail. Before she's said five words, I know. "Oh my God, he proposed," I'm thinking. Then, in her calmest voice, Sissa confirms my suspicion with the words, "We'll be home all day." Not, "I'll..." but "we'll...." I know, at that moment, I'll be attending a wedding. Wow, maybe I'll even be in it. Then I call her back. Certain of the reply to come, I say, "Tell me everything."

My best friend says, "What are you doing next April and will you be my Maid of Honor?" Oh my God... Maid of Honor? I am stunned. I mean, I'm honored beyond belief and I'm screaming with delight. But suddenly, I realize, my whole life has changed.

The last wedding I was in was my brother's. It was 1976. My mother made my sunshine yellow, butterfly-sleeved, floor-length dress, complete with God's-eye pattern stitched into the bodice. I was the flower girl, which meant I walked down the aisle just before my future sister-in-law, dropping rose petals from my white basket. I thought it was my wedding! I thought that my sister-in-law would come live with us at our house, not that my brother would leave us. What trauma! Somehow, I've not been the same since they returned from the Bahamas, bringing me a multi-colored dollar bill with a picture of some lady on it.

So, here comes my second wedding. Wait, that's not true. I was in my dad's second wedding, and in my mom's second wedding too. But both nuptial rituals resulted in years of therapy, so I'll leave those out. Okay, so this is my second wedding. And I'm Maid of Honor. Gee, no pressure!

I'm trying to think of the last wedding I attended. It was my buddy David's big day and I'd not yet met his fiancee, Kim. So, during communion, which we all went up to the alter to share, David elbowed a praying Kim and said, "Kim, that's Bonnie!" I was even more shocked when she whispered, "Hey! David's told me so much about you! Thanks for coming!" I mouthed the words, "We can do this later, y'know?" We all got a big laugh out of that one.

Oh, there's also been Big Debbie's wedding to Big Evert. At the reception, Debbie drank champagne from the bottle before the official first toast. Luckily, I snapped a quick photo of that!

I have all of these strange duties as MOH (I learned that acronym from visiting one of the dozens of websites designed for pre-newlyweds. My biggest concern, other than losing a pound a week between now and the wedding (yes, that's like 55 pounds, but I can dream), is how to plan a wedding that will take place in Florida, for my best friend, who lives in Kentucky, while I'm out here, in Los Angeles. Can we do this whole thing online?

Posted by bonnie at 2:04 PM

March 8, 2001

I Could Never Leave the House

I don't understand the Unabomber. Remember him? I remember, back in grad school, seeing his manifesto printed in the New York Times and thinking, "Y'know, he's not crazy. He just really, really hates technology." Now, maybe that's not an accurate summary, but that's what I was thinking at the time.

Today, I'm thinking that I could live like he did, alone in the woods in a shack with none of the technological conveniences of the day. I could do without watching television, listening to music, knowing what time it is, talking on the telephone. I love to write letters, so I could still communicate, much like the Unabomber did (sans bombs, of course). I love to read, and there's daylight for that, since, in this scenario, I would have no electricity. I don't cook, so the kitchen is a non-issue. I could totally remove myself from all types of communication.

As long as I had the Internet.

For example, I can log on to Pink Dot and order food, drinks, sundries, household goods aplenty. Yes, there's a Ralph's 1/2 block from my apartment, but I'd rather go to PDquick.com and click on the list they've created, showing me everything I've ever ordered from them, and have the heavy things brought right to my apartment for just a few bucks more than it would cost to get dressed, brush my teeth, comb my hair, and walk to Ralph's (and that takes too much time, once you factor in wandering up and down the aisles, standing in line, schlepping the bags home).

I can read all of the news on my favorite websites. I can post on boards where people with common interests live and lurk. I can update my website a dozen times, manage my eCircles, and shop, all from home. Amazon.com loves me. Think I'm overstating it? Well, like Pink Dot, they keep up with my purchases. They also, bless their hearts, keep up with items I own that did not come from their site. More importantly, they care what I think about these things that I own. When no one in the world cares about me, Amazon.com wants to know if I like the things I've filled my shelves with. Oh, they are so sweet! I've ranked over 600 items, just so they can suggest the perfect Robyn Hitchcock CD, the coolest toys, and books written just for me.

Of course, if I'm here living the Unabomber life, I can't listen to the CDs they've recommended I buy. I can't watch the videos they suggest I add to my collection. That's okay. I don't need technology. I'll use Launch.com to hear music and watch some streaming video on some of those sites that have yet to go out of business. Let me add those lists to my bookmark file on the Palm Pilot. Oh, I'll just beam it over later.

Okay, so where was I? Oh, yeah, living without technology.... I don't know what the big deal is. I mean, it's not like I'm unreasonable. My iBook and my Palm Pilot (which really isn't a Palm Pilot, it's a Visor) aren't technology. They're pets!

Oh, wait. Maybe I'm not up for a technology-free existence. I'm just lazy. Whew! That's better. I can totally live with that. www.lazybutts.com? Hmm....

Posted by bonnie at 2:07 PM

February 22, 2001

Choosing My Religion

I'm not Catholic. I'm not Jewish (though I've been told I could pass -- it's all those Jewish ex-boyfriends, I s'pose). I'm not really anything, though I have things I believe that get me through each day and all of that stuff. Still, I don't go to a building and pray each week. I pray pretty much daily and I usually do that in bed, as I'm falling asleep, and even more while I'm driving. I'm not so much asking for things, when I pray, but really just being thankful for all the wonderful things that make up my life.

But it's almost that time again. Lent. Yup, I'm not Catholic but I always, always give up something for Lent. I figure, I can do without anything for 40 days. I mean, if I can't, then I'm a pretty big wus. And I know I've got will power. Anyone who's lost and gained hundreds of pounds over a dozen or so years knows how to show self control. At least for 40 days.

In 1999, after having lost 37 pounds, selling everything I owned, and moving out here to Los Angeles, I gave up COMPLAINING for Lent. I needed to give that up, let me tell you. I'd been working for a month with this borderline personality business owner who made every day in the office an absolute excuse for suicide (each day, I hoped it'd be hers, not mine) and had found a way to bitch my ass off every day about my psycho ex-roommate, my boss, not getting to eat chocolate, my pseudo-boyfriend's need for phone sex, etc. Complaining had to stop. So I gave it up.

That was a long 40 days. At first, I did a lot of complaining inside my head, which I decided had to stop as well. What's the point of giving something up if you're still thinking it loud and clear inside your head? Imagine, each time you think of complaining about something, anything, shutting yourself up. It kept me quite busy, honestly.

In 2000, I gave up GOSSIPING. I'd been working in a much better office, and only part-time, since I was beginning to earn more money doing freelance web design, pet-sitting, and acting. But my one or two days per week in this office provided me with lots of opportunity to engage in the good old fashioned office chit chat. I guess I appeared non-threatening, since I was hardly ever there, so everyone would tell me every piece of dirt they had on everyone else. I learned a lot. Oh, the temptation! Yeah, I knew what I needed to give up for Lent that year.

So, here it is, another opportunity to rid myself of some behavior. You've noticed I don't give up coffee or chocolate or smoking or drinking or swearing or something more traditional. Not sure why that is, exactly. Maybe because I'm sort of "faking" this Lent thing, not being Catholic and all.

Any suggestions for my 2001 Lenten Luau? Just email 'em to me. Winning suggestion will be, well, given up for Lent and written about in a future column. Woo hoo! Doesn't that sound like fun?

Posted by bonnie at 2:08 PM

February 8, 2001

Long Hair for Life?

I refuse to get my hair cut.

No, I don't have some odd phobia (well, I do--I have a cotton ball phobia--but that's not what this column's about, so, for right now, I don't have a phobia), I just cannot get my hair cut.

I can excuse away my all-one-length, hip-grazing red hair by saying, "I'm an actress! I can't cut my hair." Okay, that works. Here's why: When you are an actor, you are expected to show up for auditions looking like your headshot, which arrived in the hands of the casting directors (hopefully) well before your arrival. One of the biggest Hollywood pet peeves, from my understanding, is the air-brushed, glamour-shot-looking headshot, when the actor then shows up, less air-brushed, less glamorous. You piss off people that way.

I've been told, almost on 80% of the auditions I've attended, "Oh, it's so nice that your headshot looks like you!" Seems logical that it would, but I'm not into touch ups. I wear just a little makeup, so there's just a trace of it on me in my headshots. I have freckles. Those show up. I have blue eyes. Those show up shiny and light in those black and white 8-by-10s. I am a curvy, big girl, and I have what's called a 3/4 headshot that doesn't crop off my hips or boobs (this really shocks people, as I am told, "It's great that you use a headshot that shows your ass." Are you kidding me? I show up for a day's work on the set, my ass shows up too. Who would I fool sticking my head on Julia Roberts' body? Sure, it might get me in the door, but my own ass following me around the corner would get me thrown out. I'd rather go legit). I also have, in my headshots, long, long hair.

Getting a haircut, and I mean more than just a trim, means not only getting a haircut (a staggering $125 venture just for a cut and style, when you start out with such long hair in Los Angeles), but getting new headshots. That's a new photo session, new proof sheets, new 8-by-10s, new prints, and a new supply of 'em to cart over to my agents' offices. It's also new photo postcards, photo business cards, photo mail inserts. Face it, I don't have an extra $600 lying around so that I can get a haircut right now.

But, this is just an excuse.

I have headshots from my last session that I could use, just by cropping them so that no one sees where my hair ends. No casting director would scream at me for entering a room with shorter hair than they thought I had, if it had been just their assumption that gave me longer hair than the photo indicated, right?

No, I refuse to get my hair cut because I watch too many court shows on TV.

I'm not talking quality television like "The Practice" and "Law & Order" - though I do watch those shows too. I don't mean CourtTV (I don't have cable). I'm talking about Judge Judy, The People's Court with her hubby, Judge Joe Brown, Judge Mathis, Judge Mills Lane, Curtis Court, Moral Court, Divorce Court, Judge Hatchett, and reruns of good ol' Judge Wapner's People's Court. If there is a court show on, I'll watch it... unless it's on up against any Brenda-weilding episode of "Beverly Hills, 90210" or a rerun of "Match Game."

These court shows have taught me a lot about life. Forget book learning! Forget talk shows and the (ha ha) local news! Watch court shows.

The average Joe or Josaphine (Judge Jerry's bailiff's name) gets up in front of the esteemed (or at least judgmental) entertainment professional and presents his or her case, supplying paperwork, photos, and other assorted pieces of evidence.

Including bags of hair.

In the past few weeks, while I've been planning "the big haircut" (actually preparing for a pretty major cut with some style and layers and things from which I can never turn back), I've noticed an enormous amount of hair being presented in these courts. And it's not all worn in on heads--it's in bags--the only transportation device appropriate for hair that's been burned, damaged, or processed off the head in the hands of an evil stylist-slash-defendant.

Look, if I'm going to get booked on a TV court show, I'm going to look damn good. Why risk getting my big break while holding a bagful of my own hair?

Posted by bonnie at 2:10 PM

January 25, 2001

Earning a Living

Okay, I love house-sitting. It's one of the dozen or so jobs I work so that I can pursue my acting career. So, when I complain about things that go on while I house-sit, I do so with the understanding that I'm really hypocritical, since I wouldn't give up the gigs for anything.

However, at this moment, I have a pug on my shoulders. Yes, a pug. Moses, the coolest, smartest, ugliest, snortiest pug on the planet, is hiding from Ruby, the prettiest, dumbest, most-in-need-of-Ritalin Sheppard/Lab mix puppy on that same planet. These two, supposedly, peacefully co-exist, but while I'm here, I'm not seeing any of that.

Of course, I don't understand dogs to begin with, so maybe it's a sweet, friendly thing when one clenches its mighty jaw around the snout of the other. I just know that that's the sort of behavior that gets me escorted out of trendy LA clubs. Maybe I go to the wrong clubs.

Anyway, while house-sitting, I usually get depressed over the fact that I surrender my free time during the most popular travel days of the year to pick up poop or scoop litter and live in a palace I could never afford. This time, I'm not depressed, despite the fact that I've been hearing constant messages on the machine, congratulating said palace-owner on her recent Golden Globe nomination. I'm not jealous. No, not at all! Even though I was sure that my birthday would be listed on Entertainment Tonight by the year 1990, I still believe that it shall be in 2001. That doesn't make me unreasonable, it means I have goals, dammit.

One of my goals, when I house-sit, is to take bubble baths. I have only a stand-up shower in my crash pad of an apartment, so this is a biggie. Other goals include watching cable TV (since I don't have cable) and using the kitchen (since I don't have one of those either). Even though I don't know how to cook, it's important to me to do more than microwave a frozen dinner, since I can do that much in my crash pad. Here, I can heat up Spaghetti-Os with Meatballs on the stove (which I did yesterday, for breakfast -- yummy).

Last night, after tiring out the puppy and convincing the pug not to carry away my socks, I began filling the bathtub with the usual water and some delicious smelling imported bubble stuff. I lit candles, put on some music, and eased into the tub. I thought the water could stand to be hotter, so I let some of it out, and began to add some more, full-blast on hot. I began to relax and breathe in the aroma of mango or whatever when I realized the water entering the bath was ice cold.

"Hmm," I wondered aloud, as I changed the temperature to the extreme other direction, figuring I'd somehow become inept at reading "H" and "C" and knowing what those letters mean. Nope, the water was still cold. "Well, this sucks," I told Moses, who was eying the bubbles, playfully. Figuring that the water heater just needed to replenish itself, I began washing my hair. Yeah, that was smart. I had to rinse this stuff out eventually, and, you guessed it, the water never heated up.

What a disaster! I'm now taking a tepid bath, rinsing my hair with icy water, not giving a shit about the mango stuff and all of this in front of a snorting pug. I'm outraged! Is this what I'm getting paid for?

Oh, wait... no, it's not. Duh! Back to cable TV.

Posted by bonnie at 2:11 PM

January 22, 2001

Temping in LA

Originally found at Wolfesden.net In Response To: Who else here has a day job? Do you still act? (Cami)

Cami,

What follows is part of an email I sent to someone who contaced me for advice on the subject of freelancing and temping (back in July, 2000). Hope any of it is of use to you. Good luck!

++++++++++++++++++++++++

When I first got here, I was the office manager for a small temp agency in Hollywood that sends folks out exclusively within the industry. What I learned while there was that the temp agencies are getting a TON more for you than you get. You would be much better off, hourly, by getting your own gigs. Of course, that requires that you be entreprenurial.

The down side to working in "big" industry jobs is that you don't want to get known as the receptionist - you want to get known as the wacky neighbor (or whatever part you'd play). I've found it's better to work in "fringe" industry settings - like the trade papers, the magazines, the production houses - that support the industry, rather than the studios and networks. That way, you can still get time off for auditions, remain in an entertainment setting, but not get pigeon-holed as a temp (or, if you do, it doesn't really matter as much).

Freelancing requires a good bit of organizational skill and a great memory for names, faces, etc. You don't ever want to "drop" a contact. You have no idea how valuable it can be, down the line.

Of course, I don't know you, so I can't give you specific advice, but I can tell you what worked for me. I know a lot about computers, so I started doing freelance work, teaching old ladies how to send email to their grandkids, installing software for the technophobic, building the occasional webpage. People will pass your name around until you're having to turn people away! That's a great feeling! But, it takes a while. I had to get VERY poor between temping and freelancing. But I wouldn't trade it!

One of my clients is a college textbook publishing company. A very mom-and-pop place, extremely casual, and the most flexible company I have ever encountered. They hire everyone at $8/hr. to start (which sucks), but raises come very, very fast, once they find out they can count on you. Jobs range from packing books into boxes to copy-editing from home. Some folks that work there come by once a month to get assignments and do everything by email and phone, billing whenever they need a check. There are clerical jobs, data entry, phone work, billing... on and on. They are always looking for people, as the company is really growing. Many actors work there. We run lines together in the break room!

A local actor's trade paper started calling me in to do as-needed data entry work when people went on vacation back in November 1999 (I'd sent in my resumé for a one-day-per-week typesetting job in September), then they asked me to transcribe some interview tapes, and now I have my own column. The beauty of freelance is, no matter what, you pick and choose your work. I was happy to just be in that environment - and now, just by being reliable and flexible, I'm getting to interview people I would PAY to see, and instead I get paid to do it!

I also tutor kids, house sit, babysit, petsit, design webpages, create educational software, etc. I used to be a paid studio audience member, a substitute teacher, and also taught traffic school for the Improv Comedy Club, but quit b/c it became the lowest-paying / most time-consuming job I had, and I had enough to choose from to get really picky. Again, that's really nice!

A book I can recommend (one that I bought just two weeks before leaving the temp agency) is "Survival Jobs". They sell it at Samuel French and on Amazon.com, probably everywhere else too. It's filled with ideas for ways to make money while leaving you with time, energy, and passion to follow your dreams. I think it lists 154 jobs (and I've worked about half of them). ; )

If you're sticking with temping, register with multiple companies. Be available. On the days you don't temp, ask the agency if you can come in and improve your skills on their computers. They will notice the effort and reward you with the best jobs. Also, you'll get better paying jobs when your skills improve.

Job Factory is a service you pay for, but it pays for itself with the first job you get, which is guaranteed. If you take in The Working Actor's Guide and a headshot, you get like 20% off (making it $45, I think). Tell them I sent you, if you go. They love me. I haven't been a member since December 1999, but I worked SO much while with them, they still know my name.

I don't know that the money is much better than with temping, but there's certainly more listings there than with most temp agencies on any given day, mainly b/c the companies DON'T have to pay for the service, like they do when they hire you through Apple One. Most companies pay cash on the day you work. That's a biggie! Most of it is "one day" work, meaning you won't have to deal with taxes or anything. They have long-term stuff, too, but it's all very non-traditional. The guy who started the company was an actor, frustrated with the temp scene in LA. So, they're very understanding. Again, though, it working relies on your ability to be proactive.

One lady I worked with (for $12/hr., teaching her how to use her computer -- I charge $50/hr. now) in September 1999 headed her own casting service and gave me tons of free "insider" info after we'd worked together a few times. Now, she's a casting director on a film and asked me if I could come over again. I had to say no, but we'd made such a good connection last year, she asked if I'd read for a part in the film. You can't really put a price on that kind of thing!

Okay, I've gone on and on and on and on! Tomorrow's my birthday and I think I'm trying to be all wise and grown up or something! It'll pass, I'm sure!

Take care, good luck, and let me know if you'd like me to walk your resumé in to any of the companies where I work!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you get to the point where you want an "in" for any of these joints, just let me know.

One benefit to working freelance with a dozen or so companies is that, at any given time, you can hook friends up with jobs of some sort.

Good luck to you, and just stay focused. You have a passion to follow. The day job thing is just a way to make sure you can live that dream.

Posted by bonnie at 7:21 PM

January 11, 2001

Delta's Dirty Secrets

Now, I know better than to put this "out there." It means my pass-riding days are over. And trust me, I do fear the Delta Gods. But there is something that only members of the Delta Royal Family share and it's time the rest of you knew.

I have a kinship with fellow Delta Brats that I didn't discover until college. See, we've been socialized to keep this lifestyle to ourselves. Now I know why.

I realize that people will not feel sorry for me when they know that my complaints relate directly to my lifetime of free flights, often in First Class. Okay, I'll admit it; it sounds petty to gripe about the rules when you're getting something for free. Still, it's time the truth is told about my childhood and Delta Airlines.

One important note, in case you Delta Spies are reading this and want to tell me that things have changed: I know things have changed. I still ride on pass, albeit a three-cents-a-mile version of the pass, and I know that now things aren't as strict, but the past did still happen the way I remember it, and it must be exposed!

When I was a child, even a teenager, taking a Delta flight meant putting on my Sunday Best. A nice dress, uncomfortable shoes, and always, always pantyhose. The idea behind the dress code is simple: We want those who fly Delta to appear as classy as the airline itself. If we can control the appearance of a percentage of the passengers, the other passengers may begin to show up in clothing other than ripped up jeans and flip-flops. Yeah, that's logical.

Well, when you're riding on a pass card, you know you might not get on the plane at all. You fly "space-available" and that means you only get on the plane if there's a seat not occupied by a paying customer. This is why I often end up in First Class - those are the seats that don't sell out, generally. Okay, but since I'm basically in competition with my fellow pass-riders for those coveted empty seats, I like to size up my competition. Here's how: one of my favorite games to play at the gate is Pick the Pass Riders. It's an easy game. You just look around the gate and sift through the sweat-pants-wearing, backpack-carrying, Walkman-listening passengers to find the suits, the ties, the dresses, the pantyhose, and you've found your comrades.

Not that you could ever talk to them. My dad made it perfectly clear that we were never to speak about our "free ride" to anyone. And as I meet fellow Delta Brats as adults, I find we share stories of our terror that anyone would find out we were flying for free, our experiences with getting "bumped" in strange cities, being told there were no meals left for us to eat on long flights, and how we were all taught that you never, never ring the Flight Attendant bell. NO MATTER WHAT.

Of course, I've now begun talking with my fellow pass-riders to compare stories of woe. Again, I know no one will feel sorry for me here, since these stories of woe come as a result of flying for free everywhere. Okay, okay, get past that and just imagine this experience.

I was in college, feeling bold, and visiting a friend for the weekend. I checked in at the ticket window wearing a sweater, skirt, leggings, and boots (hey, it was 1989 - this was accepted fashion). A Delta agent approached me, walkie-talkie in hand, and escorted me to a tiny room off the main terminal. "I know you must have pantyhose in your bag," he said, and closed me in the room while he waited outside for me to change. I'm not sure what was wrong with leggings. I mean, my ankles were not exposed in any way. But, I dutifully changed into the black pantyhose I'd tucked into my carry-on bag and emerged from this secret room for a final inspection from the plain-clothed Delta agent.

"Okay," he said. "That's better." And with that, he disappeared. I'm not sure if he lurked behind a nearby plant to know that I was a pass rider or if the ticket agent pressed some secret Dress Code Button, but I was humiliated, just the same. I understand that we're looking for a "classy" thing with this dress code, but COME ON!

Maybe Delta and L'eggs had some sort of corporate deal that no one knows about. Whatever. Point is, I'm almost positive that the relaxed dress code is not a result of years of research showing that extreme over-dressed-ness does NOT contribute to the improved look of those paying full fare but instead is a direct result of the end of the corporate deal Delta made with L'eggs in 1950. Look it up! I bet I'm right. Okay, maybe not, but still, think about it the next time you check in at the ticket counter and see some guy with a walkie-talkie, checking out your wardrobe.

Posted by bonnie at 2:12 PM

April 21, 2000

Southern Fried Observations

* "Iced Tea" means "Sweet Tea", even from the McDonald's Drive Thru.
* Hardee's now has the Carl's Jr. Star logo.
* Slower traffic moves to the right lane as you come up behind them in the left lane.
* Traffic jams span 1 - 2 miles and last 10 - 15 minutes, max.
* It is a pleasure to drink clean, delicious tap water.
* There's superior local TV news but very few radio stations.
* You pay for your tank of gas after filling up.
* Bank of America has now bought up NationsBank / C&S.
* 430 miles of driving yields: cows. Lots and lots of cows.
* Doctors' waiting rooms include magazines AND the Bible.
* Yes, Ma'am. No, Ma'am. Period. You respect your elders!
* Time stands still in Athens. The exact same teenagers in the exact same outfits are in the exact same locations as when I was there in 1988, 1992, 1995, and 1998. I guess that's why you feel as if you never age when you're in a college town. Since the town repopulates itself w/ a new crop of kids each year, it always seems as if you're staying the same too. Amazing.
* Drinks cost NOTHING compared to the prices I've become accustomed to. An expensive draft cider cost me $2.50. That's 16 ounces, mind you.
* People are very trusting. I saw a woman come out of a SunTrust bank w/ bags of money, balancing them on her hip as she fumbled w/ her car keys.
* There's no bulletproof gas in post offices, banks, or at fast food restaurants.
* No homeless folks beg for money at the ATMs.
* Strangers will give you a hug if you ask for one. Okay, let me qualify that... I had had an exhausting trip to Atlanta. I'd been bumped from flights, pulled off flights upon which I'd already been seated, detoured through several states, and sat on the tarmac in Delta's birthplace - Monroe, LA - for an hour. And then they'd lost my luggage. So, here I am in the Delta Baggage Service Center, fighting back the tears from a combination of frustration and exhaustion. The woman behind the counter asks what's wrong and I wail, "I need a hug!" The woman next to me, also in search of lost luggage, reaches out and says, "Come here, Sugar, I'll give you a hug!" I started bawling. Now, I'm not saying you COULDN'T get a hug from a stranger in Los Angeles. I just don't know that you'd want one.
* My mother is beautiful. My step-father is protective. My father is talented. My step-mother is creative. My brothers are supportive. My cousin is nurturing. My friends are faithful. And everyone, EVERYONE, makes me feel like I've already "made it." No matter what California feels like after 16 months of enduring an ego-bruising profession, HOME feels like HOME. And I have no doubt, having been back there, that I am exactly where I am meant to be. And that I've accomplished far more than I'd realized.

Posted by bonnie at 7:36 AM

December 31, 1999

LA-isms:

* Earthquakes are recreational
* Personalized license plates are a means of advertising your wares
* No smoking. Period
* Everyone has a dream they're working on
* As bad as the traffic is... shopping cart rush-hour at the market is worse
* No drive-thru banking
* Potty mouth
* Sunglasses all day and night, outside and indoors
* Smacking your chewing gum
* "You know what I mean?" after every single sentence
* Dressed in black
* 3 cars turning left after lights turn red
* Sparkly makeup
* Parking tickets like crazy
* Old elevators
* Rooftop and underground parking at supermarkets
* Smog!
* Out to eat at every meal
* Pagers and cell phones
* No full-serve gas stations
* No one carries cash
* 'Tenna Toppers (these ridiculous things that fit on top of your car antenna to advertise fast food places or gas stations)
* Name dropping
* High Speed Chase: the official state sport
* Celebrity Bingo at The Stonewall on Santa Monica (Tina Youthers called numbers last month)
* Jeans = "dressy casual" - if paired with the right accessories
* Valet parking at the gym
* Meeting for coffee
* Refusal to adopt new technology
* No one's a native
* Our hours are everyone's hours - we're not getting up early just to talk to the East Coast!

Things I've learned in LA:

* I thrive on variety - the quickest way to suffocate me is to make me do the same thing every day. I've realized my tolerance for this is six weeks.
* I am happier than I have ever been. Healthy. Passionate. Living my dream.
* Surrounding yourself with positive, passionate people is the best way to stay positive and passionate.
* You cannot teach others anything by "telling" - only by "doing".
* I miss: The Globe, Engine Room, Taco Stand, Bluebird Cafe, Old Hickory House, Change of Seasons, Chic-fil-A, decent radio stations & local TV news, family & friends & Muffy.
* I'm thrilled to have: Del Taco, Improv, the beach, new friends, celebrity - sightings, a lifestyle of simplicity paired with constant activity, dreams fulfilled each and every day, constant phone contact with my Momma, dates, applause, the internet.
* I am thankful for the support and encouragement of my family & friends - it does me worlds of good to hear a voicemail or read an email or actually speak on the phone for hours... when it's a precious, supportive soul; praising me for my hard choices - and the best part of it is - I'm not invested in that validation. It's nice - but even nicer to feel connected to my core at every turn.
* 1999 leaves my life in as thrilling a manner as it entered - filled with promise and the rewards of living an authentic life: MY OWN.
* Live your dreams ('cause if you don't, someone else will)!

Posted by bonnie at 7:30 AM

October 29, 1999

Tune Out or Shut Up

Hmm... Been getting a lot of traffic lately. Two emails in two days stand out in particular. One challenges my beliefs about my body and theories about the psychological / emotional benefits to resisting change - asking to be added to my journals as a rebuttal. The other is a cease-and-desist of sorts, for something that only exists in the vaguest of terms in my public journals.

What this brings me to is this: why have I chosen this public (?) forum for my journaling? Well, at first, I was joining in Sloane's BABE2000 quest. That fizzled, but I began getting very touching feedback from friends and family. Folks wanted me to know that I had their support, that they'd been through similar things, that my words challenged their beliefs, and that this very personal "peep-hole" was pretty cool.

While only those who know me really KNOW that this is here (or would even take the time to look at it), it still is "public" - and I have to question my motivation in being so "out" about my issues. Yes, it invites controversy. It may seem self-indulgent and melodramatic. But anyone who's known me for any length of time knows that I too am these things. And part of my decision-making process in getting to this point in my life has involved being honest. Genuine. Open. So, what you're getting is a real look into ME. Values, Neuroses, Fears, Baggage, and 100% what's on my mind. It's not meant to affect you or validate YOUR opinions in any way. It's just me, living my life.

I guess all I can do is say, you've been warned. If you don't like what you're reading... STOP. It's just like TV. You invite the signal into your home and tune in the violent show... then you complain about violence on television... I'm sorry, you can't have it all. No one forces you to watch what repels you. And for the many, many more supportive than negative emails and calls I receive: THANK YOU.

Posted by bonnie at 5:03 PM

October 24, 1999

Ethics

I just had the opportunity to be extremely dishonest. And I took the proverbial high road. A rude Mercedes-driving man left the ATM vestibule in a rush, nearly knocking me down as I entered. When I got to the ATM, it was beeping frantically, asking "Do you need more time?" If I had hit "Yes", I could have continued this man's transaction. By hitting "No", I ejected his card, which had a Visa logo on it. Yet another opportunity to be dishonest. I could take this card and fill up my gas tank, buy groceries, or even something frivolous. Very interesting, temptation. Gary Zukov says it's evidence that we are conquering our greatest life challenge.

Today was strange on a lot of levels. I was at rehearsal for the USC piece I'm shooting tomorrow and the guy who was my scene partner, after having met for rehearsal twice in the past week, still didn't know his lines. Even when he read them, he wasn't nailing the character. So, the director gave him direction (as directors are known to do). He still struggled. So, at one point, the actor left to feed his meter, having asked for money from the director, which she provided. After 30 minutes, we realized that he wasn't coming back. In fact, he'd told us earlier that he'd parked in the lot, not at a meter, so that story was just a way out. The remaining actors and the director discussed his choice, and how it just compounds the "flaky actor" reputation we all have to contend with. Still, the director was able to see that it was a blessing in disguise, as she could probably find an actor who'd do a better job with the part - even on 24 hours' notice. It's wonderful to see people find the lesson in every experience. It makes me feel good.

In other news... I'm FAT. So, so very FAT. My clothes don't fit anymore, and I'm embarrassed. It's damn sad. I started taking StarCaps again today. I'll break out the near-maxed-out credit card on the first Tuesday in November to buy another supply of them at GNC (on their 20% off day). I'm considering taking Metabolife, only because I saw that report on 20/20 that said they are extremely unhealthy (see, to me, that's a better endorsement than any before-and-after photo). I'm also wondering if I could NOT eat, like I did back in 1985 for an entire Summer. I know it's possible to NOT eat... but I really like to eat. Augh!! Why do I even consider options that are worse for me than just living my life? Because I'm desperate. And I don't like wearing tight clothes. SUCKOLA! Pray for me, friends.

Posted by bonnie at 5:02 PM

April 28, 1999

Email with Sloane

[Sloane's words in italics.] Oh!! There is one interesting bit of information that has come across the wire. I got a phone call from Greg Palmer today. Greg Palmer was the guy in my high school who had his fingers in every pie: Presidential Scholar, president of every club, band geek, etc, etc. Three guesses what that phone call was regarding, and the first two guesses don't count. Yep....it's reunion time. Woohoo!! It is scheduled for August 6 and 7. A two day event. How scary is that. So I have 17 weeks (yes, I counted) to lose 60 pounds, get a good paying job, hot, successful boyfriend, and find a killer outfit. No pressure. None. Very relaxed. Calm. Peaceful. SERENITY NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Cue tragic score.....DUM DUM DUUMMMMMM!! Commence weeping.......I'm considering taking up bulimia as a hobby.

Hoochie Momma!!!! Good luck, girl. I was at 196 lbs. with a goal of 169 lbs. in the ten weeks prior to my reunion... one week away and I hadn't lost an ounce, so I bought Star Caps ($100 at GNC... but they WORK) and got down to 186 and felt better about myself. Of course, one month later, I'd weigh 205, so... it's a deal with the devil. Good luck to you! Go, even if you weigh 300 lbs. You'll kick yourself if you don't at least go. As you know, I had a blast. It's just a very surreal experience. How can we have graduated 10 years ago? Very strange. Good luck on your quest to be thin, rich, engaged, and in the best looking Vera Wang gown south of the Oscars. Let me know how you do! As for Bulimia... I'd recommend becoming a cocaine addict first. Then try bulimia if you don't reach goal weight in time. That nasty puking is really bad for your teeth. Coke may give you nosebleeds, but at least you don't care as much about hygiene as if you were sober and purging. See, you wanna go for the path of least consciousness. Don't know what you're doing to yourself and you're much more likely to succeed at it. Right?

I'm stalled out at 169 - 171. I keep showing up at Jenny Craig every week to weigh in... and I keep spending the money, knowing that I'll break out of the plateau eventually, if I just keep at it. But the emotional issues are the biggies now. I have done as much as I can on the purely physical level. Now the work gets really hard and very personal. And I'm not sure I'm strong enough yet. This past week and a half has been a roller coaster of bullshit and tears. Every person I've taken care of for the past few months has now shit on me. In a way, that's a good thing, since I can now go from feeling "poor me" about it all and now be pissed. Anger is a great motivator. Of course, that's easy to say when you've just had a Butterfinger for breakfast. What the hell do I know anyway?

I look great. I know that. Size 12 jeans... tucking shirts in... But, it's still feeling like failure to be 18 lbs. away from Goal and not moving one inch toward it. Maybe it's when I let go that it'll all come together. We'll see.

Lessee......I passed Chicken Shit on Alps the other day. Don't know if he recognized me without "Sucker" stamped on my forehead. Still haven't run into him in the big bad world, or even the Engine Room. Go figure. I came across that Halloween picture of him you gave me and was actually embarrassed. He was dressed as a clown. Ahhh....you have to appreciate the irony.

Well, I'm glad the wussy knows better than to show up at the ER. He'd be wrung through if I were there. Trust me! I'd treat him like the bitch that he is. Well, as for the clown irony (and yes, I do appreciate it), I think we really do reveal ourselves without meaning to in photos. The one I have of Ed from before I left Athens is the absolute poster-child-for-hemp-nation if you ask me. Whenever I miss any part of what I had with him, I look at that photo and remember him leaving my room to go downstairs to watch The Simpsons b/c that TV was "closer to the beer". Then I know that I did not cut ties with my Prince Charming... so there's nothing to mourn. Same for you, sweetie. HIS LOSS.

So that's me in a nutshell. How are you?? Absolutely fabulous I hope. Can't wait to see you in May!!

Ooh, ouch... news on that... I'm not going to make it home in May after all. My acting class has bumped its "final exam" (a comedic improv scrimmage) to 5/17, so I'd have to leave after that... which means I'm missing Mother's Day and mom's birthday anyway... so, I'm going to push it until after my job here at the temp agency is through, so I don't have to take off work and miss out on earning money, plus spend money, to go home. I can just wait until the summer, when my work here is through anyway, and then have the flexibility to take off whenever. Also, I need to save money to get into my own apartment (the roommate situation is not pleasant) and, of course, to get my new photos done. Then there's tuition (but worth paying, since it saves me making $300 / month loan payments) and books... you see, it's getting tight and... well, I'm already not going to be there on Mom's special days, meaning I'm the evil child... no longer the favorite. So, I might as well stay out here and be totally selfish until I'm famous enough to redeem myself somehow.

Yes, I'm filled with guilt on this issue. Suckola! Of course, stack Mom, Ed, Maria, Dawn and anybody else on the stack and you'll understand why I'm craving drugs again. Luckily, I have not tried to acquire my beloved Fiorinal, nor have I resumed smoking. I have, however, renewed a love affair with chocolate. So be it. I deserve a vice right now. I'm homesick and poor and lonely and heartbroken and fat. So there!

Of course, not everything is THAT bad... I'm just venting. I'm actually feeling on "the other side" of my shit too. The shift I mentioned above, from "poor me" to anger, has been very helpful, methinks. A very different energy now. Maybe one that will serve me better for awhile.

Posted by bonnie at 4:48 PM